Hello again! It's me - Sharkey52 - with another brand spanking new ranger one-shot! This one was inspired by a recent trip to a bowling alley with some friends and family, but of course we didn't do all the stuff in this one-shot (I think some us would've been charged with vandalising public property if we did).
This one-shot features my OCs Kanna and Joshua, so feel free to look them up on my profile if you don't know who they are. They're not all that important. This one-shot isn't even in my head-canon, so there you have it.
Everyone please, sit back and enjoy the randomness! (and probably some OOC-ness, but who knows what these guys are like when they're competitive?)
Bowling Blues
When several Staraptors and other flying-type Pokémon pulled up in front of Fall City's bowling alley, no one really thought much of it. Even when a whole horde of rangers, operators and scientists began disembarking from the bird Pokémon, no one thought anything of it. In fact, it was a pretty normal day, until...
"TURN IT AROUND! TURN IT AROUND! I WANNA GET OFF! I WANNA GET OFF!"
"Nage, I swear if you don't keep your mouth shut, I will personally sew it shut and then we won't have a problem!"
"Guys! Stop fighting! This is seriously the last thing we need!"
"...You people are scary."
Several passersby openly stared as a Latias emerged from the clouds, straining under the weight of four people. Summer was at the reins, struggling to keep the slowly falling Latias under control whilst yelling at Nage. Nage was at the very back, practically curled in on himself as he screamed about how much he hated flying. In the middle, the poor unfortunate Lunick was trying to stop the two of them from killing each other, whilst little Joshua just looked plain nervous.
"Why are we here?" Elita grumbled as she got off of her Skarmory.
"It was Spenser's idea to come here" Joel replied, sounding as if the idea alone was giving him a migraine.
"So why did Professor Hastings stay behind?" Elita asked, helping Vatona off of Ben's Staraptor.
"It was Spenser's idea to come here" Joel repeated, glancing at said green-haired leader as he raced inside the building like an excited five-year-old on a school-trip.
Elita nodded with understanding as she and the rest of the group headed towards the building. It was hot and everyone was hoping to escape the heat. Kellyn, who had been forced to listen to Keith chattering the whole way to Fiore, was blaming the unbearable heat for everything from hippies to poverty under his breath. Elita could understand why.
Meanwhile, Latias was finally on the ground. Nage, who looked like he had been utterly traumatised by the half-an-hour trip, was still whimpering as Ben and Vatona hung back to help him off. Summer sighed as she let the exhausted Latias go and took Joshua's free hand (the other one had a thumb in his mouth) to led him into the building. Lunick was rubbing his ears, having had to listen to Nage's shrieks just a few feet away from his ear the whole journey there.
"Did you enjoy the trip, brother?" Vatona asked as positively as possible. This was positively the worst thing he could've said.
"NO!" Nage completely and utterly blew "I DID NOT ENJOY IT BECAUSE THAT MANIAC," he pointed dramatically at Summer. "WAS DRIVING WAY TOO FAST! THEY SHOULD HAVE SPEED LIMITS UP THERE OR SOMEONE'S GOING TO—!"
"Sounds like the best expiernce of your life!" Vatona tried sarcasm, Nage's native language, to calm him down. "So? Are you excited to go bowling?"
"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" Nage just kept going, showing no signs of slowing down or running out of steam. "THEY ARE THE MOST DANK, HORRIBLE AND UNHYGENIC PLACES ON EARTH! I MEAN, DO I LOOK LIKE I WANT TO PUT MY FINGERS IN THE SAME HOLES AS PEOPLE WHO MAY HAVE UNCOUNTABLE BACTERIA ON THEIR HANDS?! NO! DO LOOK LIKE I WANT TO WEAR THE SAME UNCOMFORTABLE SHOES AS PEOPLE WHO HAVE RELEASED BODILY FLUIDS THROUGH THEIR SOCKS INTO THEM?! NO! DO I LOOK LI—!"
"Jeez! Calm down bro! We're not even inside the building yet!" Vatona laughed, really not helping the situation.
"And that's the way it's going to remain!" Nage stated, storming off towards the other end of the car park. With a sigh, Lunick marched after him, picked him up and slung him over his shoulder as he headed towards the bowling alley again.
"PUT ME DOWN! PUT ME DOWN!" Nage immediately flew into a rage and he banged his fists on Lunick's back. "PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANCE OR I'LL SUE YOU FOR...for...for...SOMETHING!"
"Drama queen" Ben muttered, tailing them alongside Vatona.
"I wouldn't be complaining" Vatona sighed "This is one of his good days." Whilst Ben stared at him strangely, Vatona then asked: "So, why aren't Nick and Nema coming?"
"Oh, well, they both declined for reasons that seemed to go like this," the ranger explained "Nema said she was on the verge of completing a 'brand spanking new!' invention and couldn't be disturbed. And Nick said he was too afraid to come because he was worried someone would drop a ball on his foot which would send his own ball flying out the door where it would be used as a honing signal for aliens to come and take over the Earth."
"I...see..." Now it was Vatona's turn to stare "And Nage calls me weird."
Ben snorted. "Tell me about it."
When they finally got into the building, the shrieking Nage attracting quite a few strange looks, everyone else was already at the counter and waiting for their shoes.
"Alright everyone, here are your shoes and lanes 18 and 19 are open" The shoe-person went on, putting three sets of over-sized shoes on the counter with a grin on their face. The dim lighting made it hard for a few people to see if 'they' were a girl or boy.
After a ten minute debate over which shoes belonged to who and whether Keith, Ben and Solana all had the same shoe size, everyone drew lots to see who would be on each lane. It was agreed Keith, Kellyn, Joshua, Kate and Ben would be on Lane 18 whilst Summer, Lunick, Isaac, Rhythmi and Vatona were on Lane 19. The ranger leaders, Solana and Kanna would wait for Round 2 before they could have their go - until then Elita and Solana were being referees. Nage had decided not to take part at all after rushing to the bathroom to throw up after his 'harrowing ordeal'.
"Now ladies, let me show you how a real bowler bowls!" Keith grinned with his usual cocky, self-confindent grin, waltzing up to the lane after plucking a ball from the rack.
"Do you not want the bumpers up?" Solana asked as she finished inserting everyone's name into the computer.
"Hmph! Bumpers are for babies!" Keith snorted with disapproved, swinging his arm back and forth. With a fluid, pro-like armswing, he released the ball and turned to face everyone as the ball rolled down the lane.
"Please hold the applause" he grinned before hearing a smack as the ball rolled straight into the left gutter. Turning in disbelief, Keith watched as the ball continued down the gutter without hitting a single pin. Kellyn, Kate and Ben struggled not to laugh. Fuming, Keith grabbed the ball as it came back up on the return and rolled the bowling ball into the gutter yet again.
"That, sports fans, is what we call an open frame" Spenser remarked from behind a randomly placed desk, somehow wearing a suit with a headset.
"That it is, Spenser" Cameron agreed, wearing a similar outfit while shuffling a pile of blank pieces of paper for dramatic effect.
"Did you steal that desk from the manager?" Elita asked, eyeing the manager's office where a lonely wooden chair sat.
"I resent that remark!" Spenser complained, jumping to his feet and banging his fist on the table "I am a ranger leader! I do not steal from ordinary citizens! I am here to serve - not become the next Clyde Barrow!"
Elita rolled her eyes. "Right, whatever."
While this was all going on, Keith was glaring at the screen as a cartoon of pins laughing at a gutter ball played before the score came up on screen.
"The lanes are uneven and the ball was oddly shaped" he complained, sitting down in a chair as Kellyn took his turn.
"Let me see" Kellyn hummed as he picked up the same bowling ball and walked up to the alley to bowl. With an awkward swing, he released the ball and it went sailing straight into the pins, knocking all ten of them down in an easy strike.
"Seems fine to me" Kellyn remarked, dusting his hands as a cartoon of a strike filled the screen, the cartoon pins covered in bandages.
"That was a marvellous strike by Kellyn Hajime after Keith Dazuru's failure to hit a single pin by default of the puddle, otherwise known as the dreaded gutter ball!" Cameron pointed out, Spenser nodding in agreement. Rolling his eyes and plainly deciding being around his two colleagues was far too embarrassing, Joel marched off to get everyone's drink order.
"Okay, you don't have to rub it in!" Keith grumbled as Kellyn returned to his seat and put his feet up on the seat behind the computer keyboard, clearly smug and proud of himself.
"We can always raise the bumpers so it can't go into the gutter next time" Kanna soothed, rubbing Keith's back in an attempt to calm the ginger.
"I don't need bumpers!" Keith huffed, insisting again.
"That was awesome, Kellyn!" Kate cheered with a widespread grin. "Now it's my turn!" She practically ran up to the lane, picking up a random ball as she swung wildly and watched as it soared and knocked most of the pins down. Everyone flinched at the loud smack and watched as only the number five pin stood up.
"Ah, a blowout. Let's see if Kate Hitomi can win a spare without rolling into the gutter like Keith" Cameron spoke in somewhat of a low, dramatic whisper. Ben snorted with laughter.
"I heard that!" Keith shouted, waving his fist in the air. It was not clear who he was talking to.
Several people turned to Keith and shushed for him to be quiet as Kate picked up her second ball and rolled it down the lane. In spite of Keith's wishes, the ball soared straight into the fifth pin, earning Kate a spare. Kellyn cheered as Kate skipped back to her seat to watch as the cartoon pin is knocked over to make a spare, hi-fiving her partner in crime - or should I say, in Keith-teasing.
"Kanna, are you going to go next?" Kate asked with a grin plastered on her face.
"I'll wait for Round 2. I don't really like bowling" Kanna responded with a shake of her head.
With that, Joshua rose, took one of the bowling balls from the rack and made his way towards the lane.
"Um, Josh, I think that bowling ball is too heavy for you" Ben remarked as the eight-year-old struggled to get a grip before his swing.
"Don't strain yourself" Keith warned, eyeing Joshua as he began to swing, momentarily calmed down. He didn't want to face the consequences from Summer if Joshua dislocated something.
With a labored sigh, Joshua rocked his arms (he was using both hands to carry the ball) back only to lose his grip on the ball as it was sent flying backwards.
"Hit the deck!" Spenser shouted as he dove under the desk "Fire the cannons in retaliation! Man the lifeboats! Women and me first!"
In unison, everyone dove down and gave Spenser a weird look as the ball sailed by. Just as everyone released a sigh because the ball was about to hit the door to the bathroom, Nage exited said bathroom and collapsed as the bowling ball made contact with a rather painful spot. Immediately everyone watching Lane 18 made sounds like:
"Ooh."
"Ouch."
"That's gotta hurt."
"Not the kiwis!"
"And Nage is down for the count" Cameron remarked as Nage released a groan. Just to add to his indignity, the bathroom door came swinging back and smacked him on the back of the head, rendering him unconscious on the carpeted floor.
"Since when were we wrestling announcers?" Spenser responded, perplexed.
"I dunno, it just seemed right for the moment" Cameron shrugged "How about we get back to bowling, preferably to the less-likely-to-cause-causalities Lane 19?" With that, the duo carefully readjusted themselves in their original seats.
Rhythmi walked over to the bowling ball rack to pick a ball as a large figure from Lane 20 picked up their own ball.
"Excuse me, miss, but you're better off choosing a lighter ball unless you want to end up like that poor kid" The man explained, pointing to Joshua who was attempting a second go.
"Are you saying I'm weak?!" Rhythmi practically screamed in the man's face as Lunick suddenly appeared next to her so she would not attack the man. "That I'm just too fragile and petite to do a man's job?!"
"Well, I—" the man stuttered, rather taken back to say the least.
"I know I've heard it all before! A little girl like me couldn't possibly do a man's job! Well we'll just see!" Rhythmi growled, on the verge attacking this man with her nails. Though she was a usually sweet girl, she didn't take lightly to her feminine status being prodded at. Keith had received many beatings for it.
"Bipolar" Summer said between mock-coughs.
Rhythmi glared at her as she grabbed a pink bowling ball and angrily rolled her ball down the lane. The ball flew down the lane and managed to knock over half of the pins.
"Come on, even Blondie managed to hit the pins!" Keith complained, jumping up onto his seat after having earned his third gutter ball.
"And with that, Keith earns a buzzard after three consecutive gutter balls" Cameron explained.
"Yep, those gutters sure have it out for him" Spenser agreed.
"Keith, just put the bumpers up, please" Kanna pleaded, having trouble soothing the ginger.
"Not happening!" Keith shouted as the way-too-smug Kellyn rolled yet another strike.
"Kellyn has now earned himself a turkey, the exact opposite to Keith's buzzard!" Spenser remarked in a mock-amazed tone.
"Shut up!" Keith shouted, stalking over to the kids bar to get his drink and to demand to Joel why it was taking so long for him to return.
"Now back to Lane 19" Spenser redirected.
"You're not missing anything; Isaac is still making his calculations in the hope of finding the perfect formula for a strike" Summer huffed, completely bored.
Isaac looked up only to glare before crouching low to measure the lane's lengths. As Isaac was weighing the bowling ball in his hands, Joshua zoomed past towards the bathroom, knocking the ball from Isaac's hands. The ball landed with a thud and slowly made its way down the lane. The bowling ball seemed to dance on the edge of the gutter before rolling away and knocking six of the pins down.
"You've gotta be kidding me!" Keith shouted upon his return, spilling his drink on the unconscious Nage.
Issac was forced to take another turn, and this time managed to knocked down the rest of the pins with his perfect formula (20 minutes later of course).
"With that, Isaac tops Rhythmi with a spare. Nice job, dude" Spenser congratulated Isaac.
"All my careful calculations were for nothing!" Isaac moped as Joel came back with the rest of the drinks.
"What did I miss?" he asked, handing everyone their drinks. Joshua whooshed out of the bathroom again, nearly knocking Joel over and tripping over the unconscious Nage to return to his seat in time to watch Ben's turn. Nobody questioned why it had taken him 20 minutes - Joshua may not be a ranger, but he was just as strange as one.
"Nothing much" Ben shrugged with a smirk as he went on to get a spare.
"Now we have Lunick taking a turn" Cameron went on.
"We don't need a play-by-play!" Keith grumbled, sitting back in his seat.
Lunick picked up a dark colored ball and walked over to the lane as one of the other members remarked "emo" while coughing. Guesses who. Narrowing his eyes at the perpetrator, Lunick turned back to the lane and rolled the ball straight down the lane. Covering her hand over Keith's mouth, Kanna and everyone else watched as the ball made contact with the middle pin and caused all but two pins to fall over.
"Oh my, the dreaded seven-ten split, dudes!" Spenser gasped with mock-worry.
"Bed posts, a bowler's worst fear" Cameron remarked with equal mocked-dramatics.
Lunick smirked to himself, picking up his bowling ball when it returned. With a quite a bit of confidence, Lunick rolled the bowling ball down the very far right of the alley, letting it hit the outer side of the tenth pin. Unfortunately, the pin whizzed past the seventh pin without knocking it down.
"Ouch! Better luck next-time, dude!" Cameron exclaimed. Lunick heaved a disappointed sigh.
"Your turn, Summer" he pointed out as he sat down with his hands in his pockets.
Back on Lane 18...
"Come on, Keith, it's your turn, just roll one last time" Kanna coaxed "The game's almost over."
"I'm done" Keith scowled, turning away in his seat with his arms folded.
"Fine, then, I'll bowl for you" Kanna sighed, rolling her eyes as she stalked up the lane, gripping Keith's bowling ball in hand.
Sighing rather over-dramatically, Summer rose, lifted a remarkably large bowling ball and stood at the same point on the opposite lane to Kanna. Glancing at Summer, Kanna nodded as she swung her arm back and released the ball as it soared down the lane straight for the head pin. Keith seemed to perk up at the promise of a strike (or a hit actually) as Summer swung back and then lofted the ball into the lane. With unprecedented speed, the ball reached the pins before Kanna's and caused several loud bangs and thuds upon impact. The second Kanna's bowling ball made impact, Lane 19 seemed to explode as Summer's bowling ball made contact with the electronics and resulted in a series of explosions from the rest of the lanes, including Lane 18. The pins in Lane 18 were blasted towards the ball before it made contact. Joel face-palmed as everyone yet again dove down behind equipment as the blasts caused the entire building to start malfunctioning. Bowling balls were sent flying everywhere and Spenser stood up on the desk, raising a cheesy breadstick like a sword before a bowling ball knocked him over.
"No fair!" Keith shouted as Kanna pulled him down before a bowling ball hit him.
"So much for bowling" Solana sighed as a bowling ball hit the manager in the gut.
The group quickly exited the building, Elita and Lunick dragging the unconscious Spenser and Nage with them. No one moved to try and stop their daring escape.
"I just want to know one thing" Keith huffed, leaning on his knees after they had run all the way to the harbour.
"Which would be?" Kanna asked, leaning against a wall as she heaved to get her breath back.
"How in Dialga's name did Kellyn learn to play that well?" Keith huffed, staring at the brunet.
"Of all the things you could ask, you ask about Kellyn's playing skills?! The entire bowling alley erupted and that's all you care to ask?!" Elita practically shouted. Keith nodded, earning a face-palm from Elita and several others as they left to search for some Staraptors or call their partner Pokémon to get home.
"Where do you think I go when I'm not on quests or missions?" Kellyn grinned, folding his arms behind his head as he walked "Pueltown has a bowling alley too."
"Why didn't we just go there then?" Joshua asked.
"Because Ben already got me, Keith, Kanna, Vatona and Lunick kicked out and it probably wouldn't have looked very good if we went there" Solana explained, taking the boy's hand since Summer was a bit busy being hounded by people about her part in the destruction of the bowling alley.
"Well, we'll probably not be allowed here now since the bowling alley just exploded" Kate shrugged as if she was just talking about the weather.
"It did what?!" Nage yelped, being carried over Lunick's shoulder and having a horrible sense of déjà vu.
"Nothing" Kanna responded, shaking her head as they headed for the ferry for a more safer return to Almia. "Trust me, it's probably better for your sanity if you don't know."