Broken

by The 483

At what point does a heart become too broken to be reached? With all the horror and pain they felt, the damage they suffered to body and soul, can they bridge the gap between two hearts? A one-shot, with a little bit of racy content, but noting too obscene. Mostly just fluff.

Guilty Crown: Broken

By: The 483

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Guilty Crown

Spoiler Alert: Some spoilers, Light to moderate, are contained herein.

Just wanted to do something a little fluffy, with sad happy stuff. Nothing to serious.

Broken

Ayase felt very, very, very stupid. She wasn't sure how she had managed it, but she had. Well, not the act itself. That she could excuse away. Just being friendly, or something like that. She was glad he was blind, and then was horrified at herself for thinking that. But then her worries returned. She just looked so damn stupid! Her hair all neat and combed out, skin scrubbed and perfumed, a pretty little red and black knee length dress, dark stockings, and little black buckle shoes. Had she seen it on anyone else, she might have thought it was cute. But on her, it was so far out of her comfort zone she thought she looked like a circus in a wheelchair. She steadied herself down, pushing the thoughts away before she lost her nerve and ran. She gripped her runners and doggedly pushed herself forward. She may be scared, but she would not keep him waiting. She managed to hold off the doubts by cursing Tsugumi from the bottom of her heart.

Miles away, ensconced in her personal office, Tsugumi watched her friend grit her teeth and push herself forward.

"That's right, Ayase. Keep going." She smiled as she watched from a camera mounted on street lamp, as she pushed herself into the small cafe. It had taken more then a week of working on her, but she had finally gotten her to commit to making a move. It had been hard, as even though Tsugumi was her closest friend, and she did love Ayase, there were still limited buttons she could safely push until she clammed up and sulked. She had wished she could have asked Shibungi for help, but if Ayase had even remotely suspected her confidence had been broken, that would have ended it, and she would have remained miserable.

Tsugumi had even dressed her, despite her protest on the grounds that fancy dress would be out of place, but Tsugumi fell back upon the fact that it was essential, and that he would know if she did not take it seriously and dress appropriately. This had panicked Ayase, and made her susceptible to reason. So she was now headed into the cafe, on a psudeo-date with Shu, dressed as cute as Tsugumi could make her, and carrying her best wishes. But, never content to sit idle when she could watch, Tsugumi had used her skill to get access to video surveillance and watch over her. There was no camera inside the cafe, so all she could do was cross her fingers, and hope Ayase didn't lose her cool.

(...)

Ayase pushed her way into the cafe, craned her head around, and spotted him near the back, already seated in a booth, his cane propped against the side of the seat. She rolled her way back, paused to let a waitress with a heavily loaded tray pass, and then maneuvered across the tile floor, weaving between tables and chairs. The booth he had chosen was agaist the wall, looking out over the rest of the cafe, leaving an open booth across from him. He sat, wearing a casual wool sweater and dark pants, his chin resting on the palm of his left hand, elbow supported on the table top, eyes facing the window onto the street. He did not notice her approch, so after a panicked and awkward silence, she spoke, and was exultant when her voice did not shake.

"Hello, Shu." She hoped it sounded as warm as she had intended. He turned his head toward her, and smiled.

"Hello, Ayase." He sounded pleased to see her, but it was easy for her to think that her own hope was coloring her thoughts.

"One second while I climb into the booth." He waited while she moved up, and then lifted herself into the booth. "There, that's better." She carefully positioned her legs under the table so as not to take up too much room. Shu reached out, pawed at the air, and located a handle of her chair, and carefully pushed it behind him until it gently met the wall. A lance of humiliation stabbed through her center, though she couldn't say why, and she had to wait a second while she fought the feeling down before she trusted herself to speak.

"Thanks." She said, relived that that came out, rather than the squeal she feared might have. In a way, it was pleasing, as now she would have to ask for him to move her chair before she could leave, and she couldn't just run off. Before anything else could be said, a kindly looking waitress walked up.

"Good afternoon. Are you two ready to order, now?" There was a quick discussion between the two of them, where Shu insisted he would have whatever she got, and Ayase decided two frothy shakes would be the correct type of beverage to order, and placed it. When the waitress walked off, her heels clicking on the tiles, there was a brief and awkward lull in conversation, until Shu started the conversation.

"So, how have you been?" This easy start transitioned into other topics, the drinks came, were consumed, and another round was ordered. A pleasant hour passed as the two talked earnestly for the first time in years. But near the end of the hour, Ayase's doubt and insecurity had reasserted itself, and was all but drowning out everything else. Sure, he seemed to be enjoying himself, but that was all probably just a front. What the hell was she trying to do here, anyway? What reason could he possibly have to like her, after all? She could never recall a time that she had been anything but critical and rude to him. Sure, near the end of the Quarantine, and that night when they had all lost so much, she had been soft with him, and he had seemed to respond to that, but wasn't that her own infatuated feelings playing with her? She had realized long before then, possibly not long after Gai was killed the first time, that she did indeed have some form of feelings for Shu, that had fully manifested by that night. But she had never expected anything to come of it. She knew his heart belonged to Inori, and while she was not happy about it, per se, she was not jealous.

But what was it that now made her crazy enough to think that she might be able to earn a place in his heart? Was it the petty reasoning that now that they were both missing parts, were both broken, that she could hope that her could see her as a romantic option? She hoped not, but perfered that to the thought that now that both Hare and Inori were no longer with them that she might stand a chance. But the utter callousness of this horrified her to the point to where if she truly suspected that this was a reason, she would not make an attempt. She did not think her chances were enhanced by the elimination of competition, and indeed would have perfered them still being alive to having a shot at Shu due to their absence.

She snapped out of her gloomy thoughts when she realized Shu had spoken and she had not replied. Her cheeks glowed red as she had to ask him to repeat, and she noticed he had already paid the check.

"I am sorry, I spaced. What was that?" Her face burned, and she was a little glad he couldn't see it, and that was accompanied by the usual stab of guilt when she thought such things. Shu simply smiled kindly over at her as he tucked the money into the leather bill jacket.

"I said, that it was a surprise when you called. A pleasant surprise." She did not mention that it had been a surprise to her, as after Tsugumi had convinced her she was going to make a move, dialed, and then threw the phone to her. The conversation had been flustered and confused, but somehow, she had managed to ask if he wouldn't mind going to get something to eat or drink with her.

"I am happy you were willing to come. I know it was kind of sudden." He waved it away witth his prosthetic arm.

"No hassle. It was enjoyable. Would you care to go for a walk?" He felt the face of his watch. "It's still fairly early."

Ayase was so taken aback by the question, she couldn't immediately answer. When he began to look concerned, she managed to croak a response.

"Oh, sure. Umm... would you push my chair back to where I can get into it?" He nodded, and pulled the chair away from the wall, and to the side of the booth where Ayase sat. She mounted her conveyance, and backed up, backing clear until Shu, his cane feeling out his path, moved past, wherein she followed. They walked from the shop, where instantly Tsugumi was following through the wires, pleased to see that they were still together, and seemingly continuing their date. More and more, she was glad she had pushed Aya into doing what she wanted to, even against her doubts. There was no reason Aya didn't disserve her shot at being happy.

Ayase followed along, responding to small talk as Shu tapped his way along, impressed with how functional he was without sight. Sure, he had had a number of years to get used to it, but it still impressed her. She had had such trouble adjusting to life with useless legs, and Shu had lost both his arm and eyes. He led her down the road, across a street, and down the walk alongside the river. When he reached the area he wanted, he sat down at a bench he had obviously frequented, and leaned back. It was right about the time the sun was setting, and the air was glowing orange. She thought breifly about pulling up next to him, but decided against it, parked her chair, and eased herself onto the bench next to him.

"I always used to enjoy watching the sunset." He said, almost wistfully, but not unhappily. "I used to watch it from the roof of my apartment complex, or occasionally from here if I was late coming home from school."

"You miss seeing it?" Ayase let slip, before near instantly regeting her words. But Shu merely smiled, and raised is face to the setting sun.

"I do, but not to keenly. I still have my memory of it, and I can still feel it's warth, so it is not gone." Suddenly, his features turned grave. "Ayase... do you hate me?"

"Oh, geez." Tsugumi fretted. She had at first been overjoyed that there was a left over directional microphone in the area, from back in the GHQ's occupation, and not removed during the restoration. It allowed her to listen in on the riverside conversation, and to continue monitoring. But the blunt question surprised her, and judging from the set of her shoulders and tilt of her head, had shocked Aya fairly severely as well.

"What? No! Why would you think that?" Her mouth continued to hang open after she sputtered her reply.

"I would not blame you if you did. After all, I killed him." Ayase did not understand what he was talking about.

"Wha... what do you mean?" She asked, hesitantly. Shu kept his face turned from her, clearly ashamed.

"I know you said you didn't, but I could see it in your face the first time I killed him, when you tried to blame Tsugumi for pulling you out of the Endlave. But it was me. Both times, I was the one who killed Gai." Ayase didn't quite gasp it, though watching and listening from her apartment, Tsugumi did. Shu had never talked about what happened those terrible nights. Things had happened so fast after the first time Inori had been stolen, and they had not had a chance to press him for answers, as they had been too busy organizing efforts to keep everyone in quarantine alive. All they had known was that Gai was dead. Then, after he had reappeared and taken the Void Genome from Shu, they had all had to question what had happened, but events again were too hectic for a clear explination. And finally, when they had found Shu, half dead and blind in the wreckage after Last Christmas, all he had told them was Gai was dead, Mana was at last at rest, Inori was dead, and that the Apocalypse Virus and Void Genomes were forever gone.

Ayase's surprise at this, a chance to find out what happened that horrid night, had been thrust upon her so suddenly, it almost caused her to try and badger him for information, but her slight irk at being told bluntly that Shu had known that she had had a crush on Gai even when she had lied to him about it served to stabilize her thoughts. She saw the pain etched into his face and body set, and she mellowed.

"Yes..." she said, almost mornfully, "that's true. I did have feelings for Gai." She looked sadly out at the reflection of the setting sun on the surface of the gently moving water. "And I was a little hesitant about it because I wasn't just in Funeral Parlor because I liked him, but because it's purpose was important to me, but I did not wish to appear as if my motivation was otherwise." Moved by the desire to comfort him, she was not even embarrassed as she reached out and put a hand over his remaining flesh one. He turned his head at that, and even though he couldn't really see, his eyes still met hers. "Shibungi always used to joke about it, because most of us really were their because we believed in Gai..." She caught herself, and added hastily, "...and later you. I would not be surprised if most of us were such fervent supporters of the cause because we had feelings for him." She squeezed his hand lightly, and gave a mournful smile. "And even though I do not know what fueled his actions at the end, when he abandoned us for the GHQ, I still do not regret having followed him." She took a breath, and ended with a statement heavy with finality.

"So I liked him, but I do not hate you for it. If anything, I am grateful you have told me." As if noticing her tone, and coming back to her senses, she pulled her hand away, maybe a bit too quickly, and shrugged while chuckling nervously. "Hehe... urm... Besides... knowing Gai, I would not be surprised if that was part of his plan the entire time." Shu had his face again averted, was seemed to be looking out over the river.

"Maybe. It did seem like all he wanted with the whole thing was to put Mana's soul to rest, to save the little girl we knew so long ago. And even at the end, when we fought, he didn't seem bitter about losing. After he lost, he took Mana's soul and departed with her, letting Inori come back just long enough to say goodbye." Ayase, engrossed by the story, had unconsciously brought a hand up to her mouth, the other clutching at the dress's neckline. She was not completely sure about all that he was talking about, but had gotten some information on Mana from Shu's mother, or rather Miss Haruku, when Ayase had been ready to use the last Genome on herself in order to stop Gai. But it was still confusing. It was basically believed that Mana, Shu's older sister, had been gone from the first instant she had touched the Crystal that carried the Progenitor of the Apocalypse Virus. It had latched on to her soul, and replaced that little girl with a monster bent on remaking the earth in its own image.

Ayase fought with her curiosity, both on the fact of finding out what had happened at the top of the tower on Last Christmas, and finding out what end Inori had met. Her resistance lost the fight.

"If I may ask... what did happen with Inori?"

(...)

"Aya! You idiot!" Tsugumi yelled at her screen, her nose a centimeter from its glowing face, throwing up her hands and falling back in her chair, defeated. "You've done it, you killed your chance." She gripped her face in her hands, as if trying to will the stupid out of her friend. You don't quiz a person about their lost love if you want a chance for your own love to blossom."

"Oh? What's going on, Tsugumi?" A voice called from the kitchen. A second Later, Shibungi came out, carrying a pair of ceramic mugs, steaming cocoa filling the office with a thick scent. Tsugumi grimaced as she took the mug he offered.

"Ayase is blowing her chance to make a move on Shu." She grunted, and tested the liquid. Shibungi eyed her monitor, then cocked a brow.

"And you are still spying on her? Does she know?" Tsugumi looked irked, but unapologetic.

"I am her handler. It's my job to keep an eye on her when on a mission." Shibungi smiled wryly.

"So she doesn't know."

"She probably suspects, but I haven't told her I am watching." She smiled happily. He sighed.

"Well, it's good to see she is finally taking a shot. How is she blowing it?" He sipped his own mug.

"She's quizzing him about Inori's death." Both his eyebrows inched up.

"And he is telling her? You have sound?" She looked at him darkly.

"Weren't you just giving me crap for watching this?" She asked, as he leaned in closer, and shushed her.

(...)

Shu was quiet for so long that Ayase thought she had offended him.

"I... I understand if you don't want to talk about it." She suddenly realized she was still covering his hand with hers, and drew it away. Or rather, she tried to, but the action was arrested as he grabbed her hand, while he heaved a massive sigh.

"No. It's okay. It's just...hard." She turned her hand until they were holding hands, rather than him clasping the back of hers, and she gave his a slight squeeze. "You know how I said that Mana was gone from the moment she first touched the stone, and became subject zero of the Apocalypse Virus. But I don't think it was quite that simple, as the Mana that Gai loved was still my sister, but that all happened after she had been infected. I like to think that Mana's soul was still alive in there, but more likely it was just the Virus using her memories and emotions to puppet her until it could reach its own goal. Maybe... maybe upon infection, the Virus fused with her soul and Eve was a combination of both.

"But either way, from the moment of infection, she was gone." His face was contorted with the bitter pain of this, and his hand shook slightly. Ayase was completely taken aback by the level of trust he was placing in her. She did not think that he had ever spoken of this before, and knew it hurt him.

"As I am sure you know, having been with Funeral Parlor for as long as you have, that Inori was a clone of Mana, intended to receive her soul so that she could be reincarnated and complete the goal that started on Lost Christmas when Mana originally lost her body." Ayase was shocked at this, though she never once doubted the authenticity of the information.

"I knew we pulled Inori from one of Sephirah Genomic's buildings, but I was never told who she had been or why, just that she was necessary to Gai's plans..." she looked down, slightly ashamed, "...and we never questioned Gai's orders." Shu nodded mutely.

"No one would blame you for that. I think I only was resistant to him, because I thought I had been drawn in against my will. But Gai knew what he was doing, and even if his plans were not what we thought they were, I do think he was working for us, at least in part, too." He gave a wry chuckle. "I guess it's funny that I fought so hard to not be involved in the whole affair, seeing as I had been in the center of it since before it began." He shook the feeling away, and tracked back to where he had left off.

"Anyway, most of the situations I am guessing at from things Gai said, or what The Envoy of Da'ath said, or what my Mom told me afterword." His voice hardened, and he again turned his empty gaze out over the water as the sun dipped below the horizon, and lit the gathering clouds from below.

"And I think... I think Inori was lost back when the Quarantine started." Ayase looked up, startled.

"What do you mean? She was there with us the entire time, after you rescued her." His bitter features did not soften.

"I don't think I did rescue her." He seemed to struggle with his emotions, and tears grew in his eyes, but did not flow. "Inori was already infected with Mana's seed when Gai got me in close, and I killed both of them. I think... I think it was too late after that point. And I think she knew it, too." The tears rolled silently down his cheeks, but he managed to keep his voice level.

For some reason beyond her pall, Ayase knew what to do, and was not embarrassed or doubtful in doing it. It was like the rightness of the action was beyond shame. She swapped to holding his left hand with her own, freeing her right hand, which allowed her to put her arm over his shoulder, and hug him in closer.

"It wasn't your fault." She believed it, even though she lacked the evidence to support it. He was quiet again for a long time, as he got his emotions back under control. He hadn't thought about this in a long time, the lack of consideration all that kept the pain from becoming overwhelming. But now, having started, he had the pressure to continue unburdening himself on someone who could actually empathize with him.

"When you were in the Endlave, before Tsugumi pulled you out, you saw how Inori was bound up on the stairs?" She had his head tucked against her shoulder, and was resting the side of her head against the top of his. She nodded slightly, just enough to allow him to feel her accent. "She had already been infected with Mana's soul at this point, even before I was able to get to her. I think, and my Mother supports this with her own experience, it was made fairly easy for us to escape once Mana's Crystalline form was shattered, because Inori was infected, and need time to germinate before she could be used. Moher added after it was over, that Mana needed time to rebuild herself before she could take Inori's body as her own, so the GHQ was contented to let us hide in the Quarantine Zone while they completed the preparations to resurrect Gai and allow my Kings Power to grow."

"But why do you say Inori was lost the entire time? I worked with her in the school, and she seemed fine to me." He was quiet for a long time again, and a chill wind seemed to pick up, causing her hair to flutter about her face.

"She wasn't okay. It wasn't really noticeable until after Hare's death, and probably only her and I noticed, as we had limited contact with anyone while I was doing the terrible things while I was in charge of everyone. She was having blackouts, and would come to not knowing how she got to where she was. You know how Arisa was attacked? Inori had done it during one of her balckouts, which I suspect were periods when Mana was able to seize control of her." Ayase bristled slightly at the mention of Arisa, but said nothing.

(...)

Arisa was a sad case, even amongst all the horror that Japan had faced since Lost Christmas. Ayase had a little more knowledge on this then Shu, since after Shibungi had eliminated Kenji and allowed Tsugumi free access to all of Sephirah Genomic's records, which she had pulled and copied. After analysis, Tsugumi had called Ayase over to inspect certain things within, including the file which they had on Arisa's involvement when they had breached Quarantine. True, when she first started reading, and listening to the audio logs, she had wanted to charge out and ring the bitches traitorous little neck. But instead, she stayed, continued reading the reports from her time with the Antibodies, and her interrogation reports after she was detained when the fighting was all over. By the end, Ayase could not say that she hated Arisa. If any word could come close to describing the feeling, it would have been pity.

Arisa had succumbed to her feelings of inferiority and fear, lost herself to the hopelessness of her situation, and the impartial cruelty of what Shu had to do. While she had betrayed her fellows, it was not nearly as severe as her betrayal of herself. In despair, she had allowed herself, willingly, to be violated to garner favor she could leverage to save herself. This part Ayase found most disgusting, not from the act itself, but from the other party, whom, were she ever to meet him again, she would castrate the bastard with a rusty spoon and leave him to bleed to death clutching at his severed manhood. Not for Arisa's sake, but for the indignities the little stain of human waste had subjected her to.

After this, when Quarantine was broken, and Gai took the Kings Power from Shu, there were systematic files detailing her functioning in the Antibodies, the incident where she killed her grandfather, and her abandonment of her post. The relevance of this last part was unknown to Ayase, because she and Tsugumi had been with Miss Haruka at the time, Ayase willing to take the final Void Genome herself, and had not been aware of Arisa's connection with Shu arriving.

The next set of files had detailed the previous parts of her story, as told to questioning peace forces during her inprisonment, and ended with a short note detailing that she had been found, dead in her cell, her wrists opened on a sharp corner of the metal bed frame in which she slept.

In all, the event was just another tradgedy in the sea of sadness that was Japan during the early phases of the reconstruction. The whole thing left a sour taste in Ayase mouth, and while she pitied the contemptible creature, she would not mourn her passing. He grief was reserved for people like Hare, Inori, and Oogumo, who fought to the very end, even when hope was gone.

(...)

"She came to me, shortly after..." Shu continued, the tears running freely now, though he was in control of his voice, "and told me about it. She was scared. She was afraid of herself, of what she was doing, afraid she was losing control. I think she might have known, then, something about what was happening, but she did not say. But when the time came to give her up for punishment, I refused. Inori was all that kept me from breaking during that time, and I could not let her go." His tears stopped, and he wiped them away, his voice again growing hard. "I think this act of inequity is what finally broke order, and caused everyone to turn on me when we reached the Wall." Now that he was back to where he could blame himself, his resolve was stiff, lacking the tender earnest hurt it contianed when he talked about him failing Inori. It tore at Ayase's heart, but he continued before she could try and speak.

"After that, Inori hid me, feeding me, taking care of me, as I just lay in my own failure and shame and pain. The last I remember from then, is her telling me goodbye, and then blackness. I think she drugged me, and turrned herself in to protect me." His voice was still hard, but the watery undercurrent betrayed his true feelings. "I charged off after them, when I came to and figured out what happened. That's when I found you and Mom and everyone, being assaulted by Sagai." Ayase, stroked his hair, an insictive mmotion, and spoke softly, hugging him a little tighter.

"And you saved me. You took the last Void Genome, even though you knew it would likely kill you, and you killed him. I will never forget that." The finality of this statement snapped Shu a bit out of his sadness, and a slight flush of embarrassment warmed his cheeks. Burned in his mind's eye was Ayase's limp body at the base of the stairs, given up as the truck bore down upon her. That was the image he had seen when he snipped Sagai's life line.

"It was nothing special..." he said, suddenly acutely aware of the warm form holding him, and felt his body responding, "he whole thing was my mess, even before I knew it. I had to end it, protect you all, and free Inori." He carefully did not use the word "save" there, because he had not, he had simply freed her soul from Mana's influence. Ayase, not caring how he worded it, muttered quietly.

"It may not seem so to you, but it was, and is, special to me." Shu, now feeling a warmness he had not in a long, long time, tried to take his mind off of it by continuing.

"After that, you know what happened until I reached the top of the tower, and confronted Gai. When I finally reached him, it was too late. Inori had been completely consumed by the crystalline virus, and was reborn as a corporate Mana. She tried to get me to join her, but I spurned her, and Gai and I fought. He lost, although, I think that too, was part of his plan." The air got slightly colder, and smelled of water, rain approaching. They both became more aware of the warmth of their closeness. "He had drawn out Mana's Void, and while I held with all of your's support, it was not enough. As I was about to fail again... I heard her voice. It told me not to give up, and from a small, crystal flower where Mana had hatched from, Inori's own void appeared, and she helped me defeat Gai, who finally got his wish. Holding Mana close, they were gone. And with that, I began to absorb the Virus. All of it." There were no tears, just a level, steady, weary sadness.

"I don't know if it was part dream or not, but in the middle of being consumed, I know, somehow, Inori was there with me, to go with me where it was I was to go when I finished solidifying, and shattered, banishing the Virus, the Genomes, and all of it from this existence. But somehow, weather it was just her spirit, or if she had regained her body for only a minute, Inori was there, and she took the virus herself."

He said no more, indeed, there was no more to be said. He had made it out of the ruins after, somehhow, and after that it was all just a long, dull sad period, where he interacted when he needed to, but mainly kept to himself. Ayase didn't know what to say, but knew she had to say something.

"I am sorry." Was all she could muster, but the squeeze on her hand showed it was appreciated. They just sat like that,for a long time, quietly in the dark, holding eachother while their emotions settled. Finally, though it was not thought out, she spoke again.

"Shu... you know, you aren't alone, don't you?" She felt him nod slightly, under her cheek. "All of us are still here for you, for each other, and we all worry." He moved like he was going to say something, became still, then answered.

"Thank you, Ayase. It means a lot to me to hear that." And somewhere in the back of Ayase's mind, she knew the time to voice her feelings had come, and if she let it pass, she would never be able to work of the nerve to make another attempt. She stroked his hair softly, and spoke even more so.

"You remember, back on the carrier before the assault, when I lent you my Void, to help save Inori?" He did not stir, but made a noise signaling that he did. "While it was a practical act, it was far more than just that. The gesture was even more true on the symbolic level." Shu pulled back, his eyes going wide, as he thought he might get what she was aiming at. Very slowly, and very deliberately, she began to untangle herself. Pushing herself up on the back of the bench, she held herself with one arm, while using the other to lift and place her left leg over his lap. When she finished, she was sitting, her knees flanking his hips, her rear sitting near his knees, her eyes level with his.

"I lent you my Void, but I gave you my heart. I love you, Shu Ohma." Before he could react, the look of shock still frozen on his face, she grabbed his ears, and slapped her mouth to his.

The kiss, or more accurately just her lips sitting on his, both too surprised to act, lasted for 5 seconds. It was the longest 5 seconds of her life, an eternity lived in that one short span. His lips were colder then she had thought they would be. Then, just at the point where her spontaneity was about tto click over into panic, reaction set in.

Suddenly he was pressing her against him, his prosthetic wrapped around a shoulder, palm to the back of her head. His left hand traveled ceaselessly, caressing her back, running down her spine, cupping her butt. Her hands remained up, wrapping around the back of his head, like she was trying to force his face into her mouth, her chest straining against his like she was trying to merge her front with his.

It was not a soft, romantic scene like in a sappy love movie, all nice, gentle, and emotional. It was closer akin to two vicious animals trying to maul one another. It was aggressive, messy, wet, and involved more than a little biting, moaning, and quivering. It was an passionate, disjointed expression of lust and sorrow, driven from internal fires and long surprised urges.

After what felt like hours, but was a scant pair minutes, their lips broke full contact for the first time, Ayase's tounge sliding reluctantly from his open mouth, foreheads pressed together, panting to try and fill their air starved lungs. Her eyes were still flashing with the wild passion that had shoved her rational thought down and into a corner while it fulfilled it's will after so long.

The make out session that followed was longer, more involved, and while lacking the full animal abandon of the first, was no less passionate, going from ravenous fury, to calmer, more systematic exploration or each other. As the swollen lust burned into a lower form of more controlled passions, the mood suddenly changed. As if their hearts were connected, it hit them both in the same instant as the backwash of the lust flowed out, and, defenses weakened, the unmitigated sorrow of thee past 10 and more years stormed in to fill the gap.

Every horror they had seen, all the sadness, loss, and pain hit like a tsunami, trying to push them over, and like drowning sailors, they wrapped their arms around each other like floating debris, trying to keep their heads above the evil murky water of their own pain.

Tears flowed in hot rivers down both their cheeks as all the horror brought by the Apocalypse Virus rose in their chests. Their bodies shook against each other as they mourned all those dear to them that had fallen. And they cried for the guilt each of them felt for their own roles in the tragedy. They just sat, sobbing uncontrollably, unashamedly, onto each other shoulders, holding on as tight as they could, as they cried all the tears they had fought against for so long, for all of those that never had a chance to cry for themselves. They cried for Gai, tortured from youth, fighting for the monster he had loved. They cried for Mana, a little girl consumed by a monster that she was powerless to stop. They cried for Shu's father and mother, who lost their lives and families to the Virus, either directly, or through other sad events. For Oogumo, a true hero to the end. For Hare, who loved and loved even to her last breath. For Inori, who lived short, but still loved and gave the world beauty even while she knew almost nothing but sadness. Even for Arisa, who if not for a weakness of the heart that any of them could have fallen to, would have been great one day. And for all the countless and faceless victims of the Virus and GHQ's, and Da'ath's diabolical evils.

For nearly 20 minutes, they could do not but shake with racking sobs.

And then, as suddenly as it had started... it was over. They still shook likes leaves in a storm, and tears still seeped from beneath their tightly closed eyes, but the worst of it was over. And they still had eachother. When they had calmed further, and were hugging rather than the death grip they had huddled in to keep themselves from falling off and spinning away into sorrow, they began to come back to their senses. Shu was the first to speak.

"Are... are you okay, Ayase?" His voice was weak and still wet with tears. She did not relax her hold.

"I don't know. Are you?"

"I don't know either. But I do feel a little better." She had to agree. It was like a slight weight had been taken off her chest, one she hadn't even known was there until it was gone.

"I feel a little bit better, too." She pushed herself back slightly, and while she was clear to get far enough to look at his face, his arms still encircled her waist, keeping her from getting too far away. "Is this... is this okay?" Now that the most urgent of her passions had been cooled, her guilt at her position, being with the man she loved, but only because the rest of the competition was deceased, was most pressing in her mind. Honestly, she would have happily forsworn her own desire would it have been possible for either Hare or Inori to have made it through to their well deserved prize. Maybe it was a weird form of survivors guilt spurring her doubts, but she really felt that way. Inori and Hare had been her friends, and she truly ached for the loss. In short, she needed reassurance that she was not a monster for doing what she had just done.

The first drops of rain fell from the sky. They did not break eye contact, even as the cold deepened and the rain changed from a misty drizzle into true droplets.

"I think... it is okay. It didn't feel wrong." He groped about for a second, until he found her hand, and gave it a comforting squeeze. He gave a light, almost mournful smile. "Thank you, Ayase." Her heart swelled, and another, happy tear leaked from an eye. Suddenly, Shu seemed to become aware of his surroundings. He turned his face to the sky.

"Hey, it's raining, isn't it." They were already fairly wet, but they had been a little too busy to pay much attention to the sensation.

"Yeah, it is." Ayase said, noting it was getting colder to, though she could not fail to notice the warm spot under her rear, and glowing in her belly. Shu hesitated for a second, and then spoke shyly.

"I don't want to seem too forward..." Ayase mentally snorted. If climbing into his lap, telling him she loved him, and then kissing him from seeminly nowhere wasn't forward, she couldn't imagine whatever he was about to say would be. "... but would you like to come back to my house?" She read not the thing he said, but her own keyed up interpritation of the implication behind the words, and felt her face warm at the suggestion. Not that she was adverse. But he continued, interrupting her lewd train of thought. "My Mom has work tonight, and I just don't want to be alone." The feeling behind the words was so fragile and tenderly emotional, that Ayase felt a brief surge of shame at her own horny mind having jumped to what seemed like the next logical step. Her voice was soft, and carried the soft smile she wore.

"Yes, thank you, that sounds lovely." He smile changed into a real grin.

"Well then, shall we?" Very gently, he helped her back to her seat, which she noted unpleasantly was both cold and wet. She got into her chair, which was the same way, but could deal with discomfort. Shu gathered up his cane, and transferred it to his right hand. This confused Ayase, as he lacked the sensitivity in his prosthetic to feel the feedback from the cane as strongly as he did in his flesh hand. But she not only understood, but was inordinately pleased when he offered his flesh hand to her, so that they could remain in contact while they walked home.

"By the way." He said, after they had worked their way up the street a bit, "I like your dress." She sputtered.

"I ... don't... but... I... what?" It was not graceful, but it made Shu chuckle.

"I can't see it, sure. But I know what you look like, and I felt that you were wearing a dress. I like it. It looks good on you." She could not truly reconcile this withh her understanding, but the compliment made her feel good none the less.

"Thanks. I tried to fight it, but Tsugumi insisted I wear it." Shu smiled and nodded.

"A smart girl, that one."

(...)

Tsugumi had been proud of Ayase's recovery, and the impromptu way she had communicated her feelings across to Shu. I.E.: trying to see how far her tongue could fit down his throat. Simple, yet effective. Shibungi had been satisfied with the facts that Shu's story had filled in, it being compliant with the information he himself had gathered, and had opted out of watching the encore performance, feeling that the two deserved their privacy for this matter, and had retreated to another room.

Tsugumi, like many of her temperament and classification, had certain mild voyeurism tendencies that she rarely got to indulge. Due to her high degree of emotional investment in her friend, watching her vigorous and clumsily throat punching Shu with her tongue on a park bench was akin to someone battering the hornet's nest that was her libido with a stick. So, even before the two on the screen first broke for breath, Tsugumi wandered back into her apartment, a preditory gleam in her eye, to get her own physical needs pacified. When she returned to her computer, clothed only in an overlarge night shirt, yawning and looking much relieved almost an hour later, the bench where she had left her friend was empty and sitting in the center of a downpour. With no clues to go upon to help her require her target, she ushered a silent prayer of luck toward her friend, and killed power to the monitor. Returning to the bedroom, she mounted the bed, cat crawled back to her hollow, and snuggled up against Shibungi's chest, to watch T.V. until they fell asleep. Post-revolution life may have been kind of boring, but it had its high points. And if there were better things to fight for then a safe bed and a warm body to cuddle with, she was not anxious to hunt for them.

(...)

All things considered, Haruka Ohma was, if not happy, she was contented. After the defeat of the GHQ's plot, at the hands of her own adopted Son, no less, she had had a clear conscience for the first time since her precious Kurosu had been killed. But now, with the Apocalypse Virus gone, Mana at rest, Japan again an independent nation, and her Son safe, she had a lack of tension free feeling she had not had in years.

Shu still hurt so bad it made her heart hurt to think about it, but he would recover. The fact that he had not even tried to look to suicide to escape showed that much, and he had some good friends out there, so given enough time, he would recover. But things for her were going great in all other directions, and it gave her more time to spend with her Son than she had ever had, and that alone was a gift greater than any other factor.

She didn't need to work, other than the fact that it was good for her soul. Once the Government got its feet under it and the economy picked back up, they had begun receiving monthly checks for "Services to the country beyond the call of duty." Not enough to make them rich, but more than enough to keep the both of them comfortable, as their taste did not run to the vices of the wealthy. The apartment, (she purchased the title now that she could afford it, rather than keep renting,) was kept in much the same was as prior to Last Christmas, and it suited them both. The fact that all of the surviving members of Funeral Parlor were also receiving money for their service, she did not know. Haruka, who technically could have been prosecuted as a war criminal just for her involvement with Sephirah Genomics could have lived without the money, but was contented just to be able to go about her own business on this side of a firing squad.

After the chaos of Last Christmas had settled, and it seemed clear that the remnants of the crystallization were gone, Harruka, who had limited medical training, and a stockpile of Funeral Parlor medical supplies on hand, worked until exhaustion day in, day out, tending wounded with volunteer help while they waited for the U.N. official aid. Not for atonement, she knew that was out of reach, but because it was something she could do, and it felt right. But, the other shoe never dropped, and in less than a year, she found herself home with her Son, and happy to be taking care of him. As he regained independence, she started getting official training, and by present, was a night shift Doctor at a local Hospital. It was good, soul satisfying work, and except for the rare odd emergency, gave her three or four nights a week of work, and plenty of time to spend with Shu.

She was leaning on the counter, reading a magazine and sipping tea when she heard the door open, and Shu called out.

"Hey, Mom. I'm home." She smiled. He hadn't called her anything but Haruka for so long, and the good feeling that glowed in her chest when he called her Mom had not yet worn off.

"Hey, Shu. Have a good time?" She looked up when he didn't answer immediately, and watched for him to emerge.

"You could say that." The door clicked shut, and she cocked a brow, wondering what had taken so long. "It started to rain while I was out, though, so we got a little soaked, and I invited Ayase over." He emerged into the common room, not quite dripping, but well soaked. Haruka's lips curled into a smile as she saw the girl in the wheelchair roll into view, her wet dress clinging to her skin.

"That's nice. Hello, Ayase. Long time no see." There was something stiff about the way the girl bowed and greeted her.

"Thank you for having me over, Miss Ohma." Haruka chuckled.

"Please, dear, call me Haruka. No need for rigid formality. We're all friends here." She came around the counter and into the room. She was dressed in much the same fashion she always did when at home, trading coverage for comfort. A opaque, solid block color nighty top that ended just below her short ribs, and a pair of matching panties that missed being trampy by about a centimeter of cloth. She pat her Son's shoulder, and it came away with water. "Isn't that right, Shu?" He shucked his over shirt before answering, and she took it from him.

"Yeah. That's right, Mom. I am going to go grab something dry. Back in a minute." Haruka paused on her way to hang the shirt by the heater.

"The hell you are. You're completely drenched. You go run a tub, and then climb in a soak for a while. It'll be good for you. Go do that, while Ayase helps me make some more tea, and I get her something dry to wear." They both tried to argue, but Haruka would have none of it, threatening to haul Shu in and forcefully strip and dunk him herself is he wanted to fight it. Ayase tried to protest that she didn't want to be a bother and would dry out shortly if she sat by the heater.

"Don't be silly, dear. It's less then no trouble, you are as drenched as Shu, and..." she made a show of scanning Ayase up and down, "... you are near enough my size as to be able to fit into most of my wardrobe." A playful smile crept over her pretty features, and her voice had a playfully deviant quality to it as well. "Although you might find the chest a little tight, I am not quite as endowed as you are, Hun." She let the right words drip with slow emphasis, and got the desired result. The kids were so much fun to tease. Ayase's cheeks glowed pink, and Shu's face was carefully blank. Oh-ho, Haruka thought, something is afoot here. She smiled internally, and hoped what she thought she detected was correct, and judging by the flush in Ayase's face, the way Shu was no longer arguing, but moving off to do what she said, what looked like three pink scratch marks on the back of his neck, and what could have been a bite mark on Ayase's throat just above the collar bone, the rain had interrupted far more than a pleasant afternoon out. She hoped so. A little romantic entanglement would be a good way to shake Shu out of his apathy, and though she had a limited impression of Ayase from their short acquaintance, she had liked the girl.

Haruka turned and walked toward her room, and called over her shoulder.

"Come along, Ayase." She did not watch to make sure but strode out of the room, and was pleased when after a short hesitation, she heard the squeak on wheels following her. Moving into her own room, she walked straight to her own closet, and began rooting about.

"I am afriad I don't ...really... have... much in the way of lounging clothes," She said, grunting between words as she dug though the mishmash of dresses, lab wear, and colorful hospital scrubs she had hanging in the space. "... as when I am home, I never wear much more then this...especially now that I won't offend Shu's rather delicate sensablities." It was said with no malice, just quiet contemplation.

"Anything will be fine, Ma'am. I'm not picky." Haruka turned a happy smile on the chair ridden girl.

"Aww, you're sweet. Here." She tossed her a fluffy white robe. "Go ahead and shuck your wet clothes now, and I'll lay them out in here to dry." She tapped her chin thoughtfully, and decided that she had nothing that would be worth just laying around the house in the catogory of "outside wearables." She would have liked to have an actually night gown, or even a full length negligee, a nice, steamy number that would raise her Son's blood pressure when he got the image of Ayase in it in his head, but she slept in her undies, as now, or in the buff if it was warm, and hadn't had a reason to look into sexy night clothes for a long time. Damn Shuichiro anyway, the bastard.

She shook the bitter thought from her head, and moved away from the closet and toward a dresser accross the room. She could spare some underwear, like what she had on... Ayase would look good in that, though it might hang up a little. She noticed Ayase having trouble getting the wet dress off.

"Need a hand, sweetheart?" Ayase had managed to retract her head into the pull over dress, but the wet fabric was sticking to her skin, and she was having trouble finding her way back out.

"No, thanks. It's just proving more resistant than I had anticipated." She muttered as she fought. Haruka paused, then moved over, located the shoulders of the garment, and gently pulled while Ayase wiggled, until the whole dress finally slithered clear. Aya shook her hair to get it out of her face, and smiled. "Thanks." Haruka returned it.

"Never a problem." She passed a skilled eye over the girls body. In the better light, she saw that her first impression was correct. Ayase's eyes gleamed with a fire that Haruka very well recognized, and the mark on her throat was indeed a bite mark, almost a full blown hickey. Further down, she noticed another suspicious red mark on the plaer skin on the top of her right breast above the line of her sopping light blue bra. She feigned a surprised look, and leaned over to inspect better.

"Excuse me if I am wrong... but is that a hand print on your boob?" She kept her voice innocently curious, and pointed. It took every ounce of willpower Haruka had not to collapse in a fit of giggles at the girls reaction.

A look of abject terror lit her face, as she craned her neck downward to stare at the blurred red imprint of what was unmistakable 3 fingers from at least the second knuckle sticking up over the line of her bra, as if the hand were still there, cupping her boob from under the cover. Ayase's entire face blossomed scarlet like a flower opening on a high speed camera. No exaggeration; her whole face. From hairline down, she was a uniform red that seemed to be even darker then the mark on her breast, while her ears burned a shade even darker than that, and on down her neck until the blood vessels coloring her sunk to far below the surface to show color, and in a smooth gradient, the skin faded back to the lily white of her chest.

She looked as if she wanted to cry, vanish, run and faint all at the same time.

"Oh... uh, no, i... uh, you see... it... I must have... missed and ...er.. grabbed myself... yeah... I must have grabbed myself a bit to hard while trying to get my... er... my... my dress off!" She puttered an stammered in panic, losing her track and regaining it mid sentence, and almost shouting the last part. Haruka took a deep breath to steady herself, and played it dumb, sort of.

"Oh, okay. Then what about the bite mark on your throat?" Haruka decided to ennd it there, for she was starting to fear that Ayase was going to blow a blood vessel or pass out for real, and neither suited her purposes. Damn kids; if they couldn't take it, why do they make it so easy? She grabbed Ayase's shoulders with both hands, as if to steady her.

"Calm down, Ayase, I am just playing with you." The girls brown eyes darted around in quick jerks, like a cornered animal. "So help me, if I have to swat you one to calm you down I will." Their eyes met, and Ayase settled slightly, though her blush didn't recede. Haruka gave her warmest, most motherly smile. "I am sorry, I hassle you. I forgot what it was like back when I was your age. But you don't need to worry about me, dear. I heartily approve." Haruka patted Aya's cheek, felt the warmth, and moved again toward the dresser. "Now finish peeling while I dig out some skivvies for you." Ayase did as she was bid as the blood slowly left her face. Haruka looked up, a pair of panties strung on a finger of each hand, holding them up between the women, as if trying to mentally fit them on her, shook her head, and tossed them back into the drawer. Her hips were narrower than her own. "Just toss the wet stuff over with your dress. I don't know if the leggings will hold out, but won't hurt to dry them out, too." She grabbed another pair, this time of brief style panties, and decided the elasic nature of the tighter garment would help it stay on, and set it aside, in the approved pile. Haruka then noticed something she hadn't thought about before.

"Oh!" Ayase, still recovering from her fluster, jumped slightly. "My, I bet your chair isn't much dryer then you were, dear. I am sorry, I never even thought. Hop over onto the bed a minute, and I will grab a towel for it." Ayase started to protest, so Haruka took the diplomatic approach, and ignored her, walking into the adjoining bathroom, and sniffing 3 towels before finding one cleanenough for guests. She'd have to get some laundry done this weekend. She was pleased to find Ayase had transferred herself to the bed in her absence, and less pleased to note that there was indeed a puddle in the seat of the chair.

"So sorry, I should have realised." She added, folding the towel and setting it on the seat.

"It's really no trouble Miss..." Haruka fixed her with a look that promised bad things if the next word was not chosen carefully, "... Haruka." Haruka smiled, and returned to her previous task.

"If you want, Ayase, you can snuggy up in the robe for now if you want, but I want you to bathe and get warm before you change onto dry clothes. It's better for you." She would not rely on the old fallacy of"you'll catch a cold." Virus's are not swayed by the weather.

"Oh, no. It's fine." Haruka sighed, and turned around, leaning back and crossing her hands over her chest.

"Listen, missy. I am a trained, and licensed Doctor, and also a mother. Now, this means, in short, that I am balkier and more stubborn then you. Now, you will obey me in this, or I will carry you in there and make you comply, if I have to sit and scrub you myself." Ayase's look gave the impression that she wouldn't be a push over if it came to a fight. Haruka liked it. The girl had spunk.

"Oh... alright." Ayase sighed, giving in, though she pulled the robe on in the mean time. Haruka again gave a kind smile.

"And please, dear, quit acting so dour. You are not imposing on us in the least. I am exceedingly pleased to have you here, in fact. This flicked her curiosity.

"What? Why is that?" Haruka raised a puzzled brow.

"You can't see it? Hmmm. Because you're making my baby happy." Ayase looked both sad and hopeful at this. Poor thing, she must be as confused inside a Shu. Damn it, Shurichiro. God, she should have pulled the trigger herself, not let the weasel bastard off himself. "If I may be frank..." She continued, pushing off with her hips, and walking over to sit beside the girl on the bed. "...while he didn;t tell me exactly what the call he received was about, I was really excited when he told me he was going out to meet a friend today. Except for very special occasions, Shu hasn't really done much socially since it all ended. And maybe it's silly, but a mother does worry about such things, when her child shut the world out like that." She looked saddly at her own hands in her lap.

"I can't tell you how happy I was to see his expression when he came in with you. It was like he had come back to life, he wasn't just the zombie husk he's been for the past few years." She chuckled softly, and looked up. "Ah, nothing like a pretty young thing kicking a boys heels out from under him to restore his zest in life." To her slight surprise, Ayase did not blush, but merely looked put out. "What's wrong?" She was so slow in speaking, Haruka thought that she might not.

"I... I don't know if what I am doing is right... if it's fair..." She struggled to find the word she was looking for, failed, and stared at her lap.

"What do you mean?" Haruka asked softly, wondering what was going on.

"Well... is it fair to Shu that I confessed to him? And what about Hare and Inori? Does my loving him insult their memories, because I have a chance that they will never have?" Her voice cracked, and Haruka promptly wrapped her arms around the girl and pulled her in a comforting hug.

"I cannot answer that, because I don't know, dear." She cooed, petting the other girls long, damp hair. "But what I can tell you, is that there is never anything to be ashamed of in love, for loves sake. I think all you can do is love the best you can, not just for you, but for the girls who's sacrifice made it possible for you both to be here, through their own love. I think, as long as you love open heartedly, then no one can expect more."

It was not a thought out speech, just the solution she had found for her own crisis of faith, back when she was first courting Shu's father. She loved him and the kids the best she could, for both her and the late Mrs. Ohma sake.

She could tell Ayase was still confused inside, but at least she had prevented the tears for now. There would likely be many more before the girl was fully straightened out, but she had a feeling her heart was in the right place, and she would make it there eventually. She returned to the dresser, and fished out a top to go with the panties.

"Socks?" She asked, looking over at Ayase, not knowing her preference." Ayase shrugged.

"Doesn't really matter." Haruka decided to go for it. Working or not, no reason to let her feet get cold.

"Socks." She pulled out a pair, placed it with the other undies, then picked up the bundle, waited for Ayase to remount her chair, and placed the clothes in her lap. "Alright, then, let's go get some tea going, and then you can hop in the tub." She started to leave, stopped, then turned back to the dresser, opening another drawer. She pulled out a small boss, and tossed it over to Ayase.

"Not saying you'll need these, but I would rather you too have them, just in case." She left before Ayase could determine that the box was in fact a box of condoms, not wanting her to get to flustered again. Giving her space to get over her embarrassment would hopefully help. She went into the kitchen, and set up the kettle and had the serving set out and prepared when Ayase emerged, her color good, and the box tucked amongst the clothes. Haruka checked the clock, noted she still had some time, and leaned on the counter.

"So... tell me about it." She said, again crossing her arms over her chest. Ayase folded her hands in lap, and looked steadily at the older woman.

"Not much to tell. We went to a little Cafe, chatted for a while, and then went for a walk down by the river. We started talking about what happened on Last Christmas, and I got into my...um... gratitude over him taking the last Void Genome for me." She looked sideways, trying to pick out the right words. "Er... I think I was a bit flustered, then, because next thing I knew, I was on his lap, telling him I loved him... and then..." She cleared her throat, closing her eyes and bringing a fist up to her mouth and speaking into. "...I grabbed his ears and kissed him. From there, the situation... advanced." Haruka smiled a broad, beaming, sly smile.

"I understand, enough said." Ah, to be young, and stupid, and love. But her mother instinct was jangling. A frown creased her face as she turned back to the range, and finished putting the tea tray together. She lifted it, walked over, and placed it upon Ayase's lap. She met her eyes, and held them, her face just a few inches away from hers. "Do what you need to do, Ayase. But please, don't hurt him." Thankfully, Ayase's gaze remained steady as she considered her answer.

"I will try." Haruka squeezed her shoulder, and gave a mournful, understanding smile.

"Thanks." Her smile changed to the one she had to wear at work, friendly, but ultimately just another face. "Anyway," she straightened up, "I am afraid I have to head off to work now. Do me a favor, ad bring the tea in to Shu for me, and take care of him while I am gone?" She didn't wait to see Ayase's response, but moved from the room to change. She was cutting the timing close, but she should be able to still make it to work on time.

(...)

The room to Haruka's door had been closed for around 30 seconds before Ayase had manage to re-swallow her heart, and draw a steady breath. Haruka seemed to being doing everything short of jumping in and putting them together with her own hands, but even with this far less then subtle approach, Ayase was suffering from that common affliction of peers that found themselves in a similar predicament. It was basically: The more someone wanted something, the easier it was to find reasons why they should not have that thing. But, working on her side was a biological pressure, along with a slight fear of Haruka if she failed, and nerves strained from a day of far too much emotional exercise, jumping between extremes, so that her emotional doubts were fairly easily overpowered by her biological desires.

She was sitting in front of the bathroom door before she had realized she had moved. She knocked gently on the door, and when there was no response, she tried again, a little bit harder.
"Yeah?"

"Hey, shu?" Ayase had to clear her throat after a false start; her voice had cracked. "You mother asked me to bring you in the tea." There was a pause of a few seconds, and then a muffled reply.

"Oh... you don't need to if you don't want to. But... If you do, I am about as decent as I can be."

"Er.. Alright, then. I am... coming in." She turned the knob, and opened the door. It was bigger then she had expected, a full sized room, a large, square tube big enough for 4 people set slightly into the floor, do that while it was about shoulde deep at the edge, the edge sat almost level with the seat of Ayase's chair. At least, it looked deep, as just Shu's head was sticking up above the surface of the water, and the angle said he wasn't laying down. A shower stall was off to one side, and a wall rack for clothes and hangers for robes sat directly to the right of the door, which was raised around a dozen centimeters off the tile flooring that comprised the rest of the room.

"Wow, this is nice." She commented almost absently.

"Yeah. Mom had it remodeled when we started getting checks from the Government. Now that she actually has time off, it's not unusual for her to spend half the day just lounging in here. Oh, the Tea. If you come over here, there is a little fold out table at each corner for drinks and such." Ayase swallowed, and rolled gently off the raised section so as not to topple the tea tray. She noted that the tile was a no slip surface, and not the slick material that most bathrooms were done in. She rolled over and set the tray down on the table.

"Hey, Kids! I'm off, have fun." Haruka called, making them both jump, but leaving before Shu could shout a reply. After they calmed, an awkward silence filled the air, while Ayase tried to figure out a diplomatic way to ask him if she could join him. Almost as if he was reading her dilemma, he made the proposition.

"Hey, the tub is fairly large, so, if you would like to bathe now, we won't have to run more water." Flimsy, but Ayase still needed a little bit of a spur.

"I suppose that could work, you just have to promise not to peak until I am in the water." She let it out in an accusatory tone that was never the less slightly playful. The pressure in the lower part of her stomach was spurring her to be slightly bolder. Shu, luckily, smiled.

"It will be hard, but I think I can manage that."

"Let me just put my clothes up real fast." She rolled over, and with slight difficulty, back up onto the raised flooring, and deposited the underwear, top, and socks Haruka had provided in a slot, but held onto the robe and box she had supplied. She then returned to the side of the tub, pulled off the robe, hanging it over the back of her chair, before sliding herself onto the edge, and pulling her legs into the hot water before letting gravity pull her into the water fully. Her butt hit but her legs kept going, ad she realized that the tub was set up like a Jacuzzi, with a deeper center, and a shelf for sitting on around the perimeter, so it wouldn't be necessary to fill the whole thing if a simple bath was desired, just the center to the step could be filled and would be about the size of a regular tub.

"Ooh," Ayase groaned with a slight shiver as the warmth seeped into her bones, feeling so relaxing even her lusty thoughts were momentarily forgotten, "I hadn't realized how cold I was until I got in the water. Shu turned to face her, his hands covering his face. Ayase frowned.

"You know, I was kidding. You could have peeked." They both ignored the impossibility inherent in the statement, preferring the playful air to the facts. Shu shook his head.

"Nope. I promised." Ayase sighed.

"Whatever. It's not like you haven't already done more then look. You even left a handprint." She examined, and while it was fading, it was still visible. "So... what now?" She knew exactly what she wanted, but was hesitant to go for it, even though she was fairly certain it was something he would want, as well. At least, she hoped so. He took on a serious expression.

"I don't know, Ayase." She decided she was going to have to grasp the nettle.

"Listen, Shu. I would like to... um... continue this. I meant it, even though it was a spur of the moment confession, it was nevertheless sincere. I love you. I do not need you to return it, nor would I expect you to. I want to share myself with you, for as long as you will let me, whether it is just once, or for as long as you will have me. I know I rate at best, number three in line..."

"Ayase," he said sharply, "don't talk like that!" She held up a hand to halt him, realized the futility of that, and continued.

"Please, let me say my piece. I know I cannot rate at the top, but that in no way lessens my own affection for you. In fact, I think the fact that such great people will always hold a place in your heart is one of the reasons I love you.

"I don't want their place in your heart. I would not wish to insult their memory by letting you think that I would. No, Shu, let me speak. I would rather have you spurn me then ever let myself think that I benefited from their absence." She cleared her throat again, but left the tears flowing. "So, if you will take me, as third choice, not a substitute, then I would welcome it. Ut if this cannot be, please, do not. For it is not fair to me, not fair to you, and most importanntly, not fair to them." He was quite for a long moment before he slid along the seat until her was next to her. He raised a hand, intending to take hers, but not wanting to grope for it. She took it.

"Ayase... I... yes, I would like to try for something with you. But I am scared. I don't know if I can make it work, not just with you, but with anyone. What if I am too badly broken?" She gave a sad smile, tears flowing freely.

"Hey, remeber, I am broken too." He gave a watery chuckle.

"You think, maybe together, we can be fixed?"

"I don't know, Shu. But if you want to try, I will give it my all." Silence again, but he turned to face her. He didn't answer, not in words, but reached out, stroked her cheek, and kissed her.

(...)

It had been a hell of a day. Beyond anything she ever would have expected. But it was good.

The first time had been as awkward and clumsy as their groupings on the bench, each trying not the impress the other, but merely trying not to disappoint. It had been interesting, and in a way, amazing, but it was strange in a indefinable way, but enjoyable, despite how uncomfortable they had felt.

The second time was better, but whether that was because of more experience, or the more organic way it had evolved from could not be determined. They had been sitting on the couch, lights out and T.V. going, his good arm around her, cuddled under a blanket. He had shifted slightly, his hand brushing accidently across the thin fabric over her breast. The sensation bore further study, so she aided his hand in returning. The next half hour was a busy, thorough study of each others bodies, ending with her on top. Being more versed and less awkward after the first time, this time was passionate, fun, and much more satisfying.

The last time, snuggled together in bed, all awkwardness gone, a simple loving merging, was the best. The most passionate, slow and gentle, loving and comfortable, a good send off to sleep, curled together, her head pillowed don his shoulder, their cares and doubts forgotten in shared happiness.

Sometime later that night, in the wee hours of the morning, Ayase came awake, and lay listening to the pattering of the rain, heavy against the window. It took a minute too figure out what had roused her, and noticed she was no longer being embraced, but she did not move at first, as she could feel it, almost sense Shu behind her, shaking with silent sobs, the result of a nightmare. She rolled over, and touched his shoulder. He shook, but did not turn. She applied pressure, and her turned. She did not speak, just pulled him close, and hugged his head to her chest, planting a soft kiss to his forehead. Shortly, the sobbing stopped, and his breathing came evenly as he was again asleep. But she did not immediately find sleep again. She stared at the dark window, again wondering if she was in the right. Time would tell. There would be more tears. Yes, lots of more tears. Shu had been correct. They were broken. Her legs, his arm and eyes, and maybe in their hearts, too. But she would try, damn it, try and if she couldn't heal the hurt, she would at least do her best to make it bearable. It would not be an easy job, and she wasn't sure even if her own worries could be solved, but for now, she was happy, and she would just have to do all she could to make Shu happy, too.

She leaned her head down, and kissed his forehead again. Then she closed her eyes, and slept.

End.

Sorry if this was not so great, and a little vague/mechanical in some places, I was scrapping to make this stick in the "T" rating category. Anyway, just wanted to make some little fluffy piece, and hope it is serviceable. Thanks for reading.