The Boy Becomes a Man

By Keesha

10/2008

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Terminator, The Sarah Connor Chronicles" are the creations of others and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended.

She watched her son climb out of the black pickup truck and shuffle his way across the dirt courtyard as if the weight of the world rested upon his shoulders. Sarah had tried to raise John to understand his place in the world while still protecting him from the future she knew he must face. She did not know what happened that week in the military camp, but judging by her son's demeanor it was not good. She knew in one way they had been successful because the T triple-eight had been eliminated, but she wondered at what cost to her son.

Sarah turned from the window as she heard his footsteps echoing through the house approaching the kitchen. John arrived in the doorway, stopped and simply watched her. He appeared torn between wanting to run to her for comfort and needing to be separate from her. The battle between boyhood and manhood once again raged through his body.

Sarah started towards her son. "John, what…"

But he did not let her finish. "Mom. I know you want to know what happened but" he swallowed hard, "I can't talk about it… yet. I need time to, I dunna, wrap my head around this whole thing."

"What thing?" she asked knowing full well she was not going to get an answer.

John shook his head no and gave her a tight smile as his Uncle's words 'we all die for you John' echoed through his head. Walking over to her, he gave a quick, yet heart-felt hug to assure her that he still loved her.

Stepping back, he looked her in the eyes, pleading with her not to push him. Sarah gave her son a tight little smile herself and respected his wishes.

"I'm tired. I'm gonna go grab some sleep."

Sarah nodded to her son's retreating back. When his footsteps drifted away, she went on her next mission, to hunt out John's uncle and see what he would reveal.

She should have known better then to trust Derek to watch over his son, she thought bitterly to herself as she searched the house for the resistance fighter. Sure, physically he brought John home safely but what about mentally? She finally located him in a small study that overlooked the city below.

"What took you so long?" he queried dryly as she entered the room.

"What did you do to my son?" she demanded, unable to keep her anger from coloring her voice.

"Nothing."

She marched up to the recalcitrant figure until she was standing directly in front of him.

"Let me repeat myself. What happened at that academy to my son?" she insisted punching every syllable.

Sarah held her ground even though Derek's eyes blazed with fury. "Don't push me on this one Sarah," he growled. "We did, what had to be done."

"What? What had to be done? I have seen your ways and that is not what I want for my son!"

Derek reached out and grabbed the front of Sarah's shirt, shaking her. "Listen. I am fed up with you belittling and criticizing every damn thing I do. You got a mission? Well I got a mission to… to make John into the man he needs to be to lead this world in the nightmare that is going to come."

Derek released her shirt as quickly as he grabbed it and took a step back, horrified at his actions. "God, I'm sorry Sarah," he said running his hands through his closely cropped hand. "Christ I didn't mean to..."

Sarah cut him off. "It's OK. It is not the first time someone tried to shake some sense into me."

"I'm sorry Sarah," he repeated. "This week was… tough. Look, nothing bad happened to John. He saved that kids life. You would have been proud of him. Angry at times, but damn proud of him. I saw a glimpse of the John Connor I know; the man who can save us all."

Derek turned his back to Sarah and faced the window again his mood turning somber like a dark and rainy night.

"Do you know what it is like," Derek continued, his voice choked with emotion, "to see people alive that you have already seen die? And to know that they will probably die again and you might be the lucky bastard that gets to see them die a second time? Do you have any idea how hard that is Sarah? Do you!"

Derek lashed out at the wall next to the window, his fist leaving an imprint in its wake. "You can't know. No one can know. Only me, the man from future," he ended bitterly.

Sarah was at a loss. She did not know how to respond.

"And I keep asking myself, am I doing what is right? Is this what John sent me here to do? What if I do something that causes the destruction of mankind? "

"I trusted you then and I trust you now," John stated, stepping across the threshold into the room.

Derek turned slowly to face his nephew. The two men stared at each other and something passed between them.

Sarah could only watch as the new bond formed between the future leader of the world and his favorite solider… and she was afraid. Afraid that while the world was getting what it needed to survive, she was losing what she needed to survive.

John.