Kitchen Killers

Demyx looked around the corner. He was keeping a tight grip on the stuffed turtle and moogle that he was carrying. The strange sounds in the kitchen continued, but Demyx wouldn't go any further. He knew that the creature or person would not be able to see him easily while he was in his black cloak but, he still felt he was as visible as a red wine stain on a white carpet.

He carefully looked around the corner but couldn't see the person or thing in the kitchen. Something metal clattered to the floor and he screamed as he ran down the hallway. He didn't stop running until he reached his room. He shut the door with a slam and locked it then slid to the floor in a shaking fit. Whatever was in the kitchen it was big and smell of burning toast. He looked down at his turtle but found that he only had his moogle. "Fred?" He said in a shaky voice. "Fred! Where are you!" He jumped up and looked around the floor, even pulled off his cloak and shook it but Fred the turtle was nowhere in sight. Demyx's heart races (lol) as he tried to think where he had left the poor defenseless turtle.

Then the horrible truth hit him. He had dropped his poor beloved turtle as he was running away from the kitchen. He breathed hard as he looked around his room for something he could bring with him. Something that could help him fight the thing off. He spotted a bucket of water and he ran for it.

The noise was even louder as he reached the spot where he had been standing before he had ran. He placed the bucket of water down at his feet as he peered into the semi-lit kitchen. Was he over reacting? Maybe it was just Xigbar or Saix raiding the fridge for a midnight snack.

There was a shadow over in the corner by the sink just outside of his vision. It seemed to be eating something… Demyx noted the smell of burnt toast again. He picked up his bucket of water and quickly moved into the kitchen and hid behind Xemnas chair. Despite being on a mission, he took a few minutes to carve "Mansex" in into the back of the chair.

Demyx was quite satisfied with his work but almost dumped his bucket of water as he heard a bell ring. It was short, loud and high pitched just like that of a toaster when it was done cooking your toast. Demyx slowly looked around the chair and saw his poor stuffed turtle laying in front of the shadow. Evil red eyes glared back at him. Demyx swallowed and gripped the handle of his bucket. He drew all of his courage and raced out from behind the chair. "FRED!" He yelled. "I'LL SAVE YOU!" He threw the bucket of water at the shadow, grabbed his turtle and ran.

He was half way down the hallway when he heard what sounded like a very angry Xigbar. "DEMYX YOU FUCKEN'…" He stopped then Demyx heard him yell. "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! IT'S A RENEGADE TOASTER!" Demyx's heart pounded (lol) as he and the now panicked Xigbar ran from the horrible beast known as the toaster.

Suddenly out of nowhere burning wads of toast came shooting out at them. "What did you do to piss off the toaster!" Xigbar yelled at him.

"I didn't do anything!" Demyx yelled back as he dodged several pieces of burning toast in the middle of the hallway.

Several people were standing at the end of the hallway. Evidently they were not happy at the commotion in the hallway. "Zexion! Vexen! Saix! RUN! IT'S A RUN AWAY TOASTER!" He yelled as he and Xigbar ran past. The three turned to see what exactly they were running from, then began to run themselves.

"Vexen if you have anything to do with this I am going to kill you!" Saix yelled as the toaster tried to bit his leg.

"I swear that I had nothing to with this Toaster. Although it isn't a bad idea." He said the last sentence thoughtfully. Zexion said nothing as he ran with the others. Xigbar grabbed Demyx and pulled him around the corner, then he grabbed the other three as the violent toaster ran by without noticing where its victims had gone to.

"Who on earth bought a biting toaster!" Saix snarled at Xigbar.

"Don't look at me! Dear old Mansex don't trust me with the shopping." Xigbar argued back.

"What's going on?" Roxas asked as he and Axel approached.

"Demyx pissed the toaster off and now it's trying to eat us." Zexion said as he folded his arms.

"Why don't you smash it?" Larxene said as she and Marluxia stumbled on the group.

"What smash the TOASTER?!" Marluxia yelled sounding astonished and angry. "But it matches the color of the kitchen!"

"Mar," Xigbar began. "The kitchen is white like everything else in the castle. Anything can match the kitchen."

"Fuck, it's coming back! And it's got friends!" Axel yelled and he tore off followed by the other members.

"I knew Xemnas shouldn't have left us alone!" Saix yelled with his hands in the air as burning toast flew all around them. Xaldin, Lexaeus and Luxord suddenly joined them as two hallways merged. They were also being attacked by toasters.

"Well that's all of us!" Axel said as he looked back. "What a great way to die…Death by Toasters." Demyx laughed and looked forward and stopped. The whole group stopped.

Xemnas looked at them and they looked back. "Is there a reason that you are all running around in your…" He was cut off by the mass of raging toaster. The group watched as Xemnas's eyes widened.

"I have to admit, for a stupid idea I'm surprised that it worked." Vexen said as Saix and Axel closed off the gate. "And now we can see if we can train them to collect hearts instead of all our bread." Saix gave Vexen a dirty look, but then caught sight of Demyx dancing with his turtle.

"My idea worked! Now I'm smart!"

"I'm not sure what to say about that but…" Xemnas said nothing as he watched the hundred or so massive toaster attack each other in their new pin. "Wonderful…Now Organization XIII sells free roaming toasters…just what we needed."

Disclaimer: Don't ask why or how I thought of free roaming toasters. It just happened. The reason I wrote a story was I fully convinced my grade, who are all seniors that people raise free roaming toasters to buy and to eat them, and that they are organically grown. Goes to show how smart the people in my school are. By the way I do not own Kingdom Hearts, wish I did. I could kill Sora for Org. XIII with my army of Free Range Toasters.

P.S if you look up free roaming toasters on google there should be at least one picture.