The Rejects
Author's Note: So, here's that NaruSaku I was telling you about. No spoilers, but I just want to make sure you know that it starts off kind of... Well, it's going to seem like another pairing for a moment. Just stick through it. By the end of this first part, you should be able to see HOW it's going to become a NaruSaku story.
Sakura
"Hey, Ino can you bring that over here?"
"Don't you mean 'Queen Ino'?"
I rolled my eyes, holding my hand out expectantly until she grinned, swiveled around in the large easy chair Tsunade normally sat in and tossed me the last box.
I caught the box, which had to be more than sixty or seventy pounds, in one palm and easily slid it onto the cart.
"And that's all folks..." Ino said.
I nodded and leaned back against the wall as Ino continued revolving around in the chair and Hinata quietly stayed where she was, sitting on the desk. All of our eyes turned against the setting sun which cascaded an orange-ish yellow hue on the entirety of the office.
My mind washed back to my youth. Ages 14 and 15 training hard under Tsunade to be the best medical ninja I possibly could be and fortifying my Taijutsu arts.
"If this is hard for you, you'll never reap the acknowledgement of those two you're so desperately chasing after..." Tsunade had said at one point.
And...
"You really think being a medical ninja is easy?! It's offensive as well as defensive. Not only are you capable of changing the tide of war with the amount of ninja we can send onto the battlefield and how effective said ninja are but you're also saving lives."
I turned my eyes to the setting sun, allowing myself a small smile.
But I did it, Tsunade Sensei... I've finally captured their attention and acknowledgement as a serious ninja.
"What the hell are you smiling about over there?" Ino asked.
"How you never perfected medical Ninjutsu like I did."
"Hah!" Ino exclaimed. "Why don't you cram that shit right back up your ass Ms. Genin Parents?"
I waved her off.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever... You don't have to bite my head off just because you weren't as useful to the alliance as I was." I joked.
"I was acknowledged by Hashirama Senju, the God of Shinobi, himself." Ino said, standing from the chair and swaying her hips.
"I was acknowledged by Madara." I retorted. "And he was like 100 times stronger than Hashirama by the time the war was over."
Hinata cocked her head back, stuck in reminiscence.
"Can you believe that was already three years ago?" Hinata asked us.
"Seems about right to me." I said, tapping my hand on the box next to me. "Since Tsunade's retiring and all."
Hinata gave me a wide smile.
"Why do you say that like it's a bad thing?" She asked. "It's not like the position won't be filled."
Filled, huh?
That was the exact reason why I was taking it solemnly. Because even though the filling of the Hokage position was a cheerful event to the villagers, who saw a boy who was of great importance to the alliance during the Fourth Great Ninja War finally taking a post they thought he deserved, and to Tsunade, who was beyond tired of paperwork. To the boy, or by then man, who was actually taking the position...and the one he'd secured it against... It was nothing but a fierce power-struggle.
"Isn't it obvious, Hinata?" Ino answered after watching me silently stare out of the window. "I mean, with the way they chose him yesterday... And the fact that they're both her teammates."
She shrugged.
"Imagine if Kiba and Shino both wanted to be Hokage and all the villagers picked Shino? Even though no one's ever seen what his face looks like and he's crazy mysterious with those weird bug things..."
Hinata smiled.
"Kiba did want to become Hokage." She pointed out. "He was actually pretty depressed when it became all about Naruto and Sasuke and everyone forgot about him."
Ino rolled her eyes.
"Please... He was just as trapped in that Infinite Tsukuyomi jutsu as everyone else." She replied. "At least give the position to someone who helped win that war."
"That's true." Hinata agreed.
"...Anyway, enough about the depressing stuff." She said, showing off a wide smile as she got up from the swivel chair. "We still have a good four hours of daylight until we have to meet the gang for the Hokage Inauguration Party tonight?"
"The Official Inauguration Party is tomorrow." Hinata corrected. "But our private thing is tonight."
"Oh, Hinata!" Ino said, pressing her hands on her shoulders. "You know what I meant."
Private thing, huh...?
My mind, which had been set on an odd "record" strain ever since the new Hokage had been decided flashed back to the moment we came up with our idea.
It was only two days before...
"We need to do something that's going to be memorable, you know?" Kiba had said as we all stood around just outside of the Hokage manor. "I mean, something we can do right now before everyone settles down and has kids and shit."
We had just finished our last mission for "clean-up and restoration" of all the arable lands that were destroyed during the 4th Great Ninja war. It was a long process, as it took us the full three years after the war had ended to fully finish, but it was also good because it kept all the villages connected. Project Kyuseishu, or Project 'Savior', piled all ninja lands funding together to save whatever land could be saved, restore the lands that couldn't be, clean-up any remaining hidden paper bombs, smoke bombs, or other projectiles that could harm unknowing civilians, and also save the minds of all the helpless people twisted and turned by the Infinite Tsukuyomi Jutsu. Many people sustained heavy psychological damage after that... Especially children.
"Kids?" Shino asked. "You're really thinking about that at this time?"
"Yeah." Choji said, between chomping down on his chips. "You don't even have a girlfriend!"
Kiba's eyes, oddly, flicked over to Hinata and he blushed slightly.
"Will you shut up? I'm working on it!"
"...In any case, wouldn't your impending death as a ninja be a better reason for urgency than growing old?" Said a slow, drawling tone.
And, like always, everyone froze, and the air hung low, and our feet shuffled slow. Naruto's eyes darted to the left... As the only person willing to make eye contact with Sasuke. It had been three years but everyone still couldn't find it within themselves to understand just what the hell he was doing there, even though he didn't mind explaining it to anyone who would listen.
I smiled.
"Always gotta go for the realistic approach, huh, Mr. Rain On Everyone's Parade?"
And then, like magic, everyone mirrored my smile. And the movement, the natural flow of things, our conversation ensued. And Sasuke, though he was standing right there, separating Naruto and I, was forgotten again.
"It has to be something special... To honor Naruto for achieving his dream." Hinata said.
Everyone grinned at that. The little boy that sucked at everything running around yelling about being Hokage was finally ready to take up that throne.
Naruto turned away from Sasuke who he had still been staring down and smiled easily and put his hands behind his head.
"Whatever you guys want is fine."
"Well, you have to pick, Naruto, it's your party." Ino pointed out.
"Hmmm..." He said, seeming to seriously put thought into it. "So... Ramen?"
We all could've fallen and collapsed right then and there from stupidity shock. Just because his Bijuu- Mode made him look brighter than the sun, didn't mean he was the brightest crayon in the box.
"Seriously, Naruto? We said SPECIAL." Tenten shouted.
"Well, I dunno! I mean..." He shrugged. "What is special anyway?"
"Like something you've never done before." Hinata explained.
He scratched his head.
"I haven't done a lot of things, really..."
I smiled again, reveling in his innocence.
"One thing my parents used to do a lot was take me to the Outer Banks of the Land of the Waves with all the Tourist Towns around there when I was younger." I spoke up. "You know the one with the Fair and all the lights and stuff?"
Most of them nodded animatedly.
"Let's go take a Road Trip." I suggested.
Sai nodded.
"I've been there before to restock my art supplies. They have some nice mountains out there, great for paining."
"And the food is incredible in the town!" Choji added.
"And we could see really cool places... I've heard the night life over there is out of this world." Ino added.
"And we could get there by running nonstop!" Rock Lee exclaimed. "Bursting with the power of EXTREME YOUTH! What are we WAITING for?!"
"A time and a date." I responded, then I turned to Naruto. "So what do you say?"
"Sure!" He agreed. "I've never been on a vacation before. ...Does everyone really wanna go?"
Shino and Sai shrugged. Choji, Rock Lee, Kiba and Ino fist pumped excitedly. Tenten and Hinata nodded animatedly and Shikamaru sighed.
"...That's such a drag." He said. "Well, it can't be tomorrow. I promised Kurenai I'd watch the kid."
"Then the following day." I proposed.
And everyone seemed fine with it, so fine in fact, that they went on...switching the topic to joking on Kiba about who he was 'working on' and probing Rock Lee about how many gates he's currently able to open while I watched. Out of the corner of my eye, Sasuke turned, saying nothing and walking along the walk in the direction of his apartment.
Wordlessly, I turned, too. Not even considering leaving him alone for a second, though the look in Naruto's eyes as I ran off after him spelled 'just give him space'.
I caught up to him. Easily sliding my hand into his palm and nudged him.
"So, great food and camping out under the stars and night clubs don't sound like fun to you?" I asked him.
He stared off into the distance, unblinking. His hand was lax, as if he didn't notice my hand was in his at all.
"I actually have work to do."
"It'll be fun."
But he said nothing, casually losing himself in whatever consciousness he'd been hiding behind like a smokescreen the entirety of the three years after the war had ended. He would show up when I forced him, when I dragged him out, but he'd remain silent, or speak and say the complete wrong thing. But I couldn't leave him alone. Even though Naruto continuously, through these long three years, has backed off and away from Sasuke, content at just having him in the village with us, I couldn't bear to see him sitting in his house alone, eating alone, just always...alone. So, I...
"Yo! Hey!"
I blinked, shaking my head as Ino finished snapping her fingers in my face.
"Earth to Sakura! Come on, I've decided we'll go out for a couple drinks before we get ready for our trip."
I stood up, stretching.
"When we get to the actual banks, all we'll really be doing is drinking anyway." I pointed out, continuing to blink my eyes. "What's the point of going now?"
"Drinks work wonders for spilling gossip!" She declared.
"DID SOMEBODY SAY...DRINKS?!" A voice exclaimed.
We all turned to see Tsunade in her classic pigtails and green gamble cloak standing in the doorway.
"Even though you three should've finished packing my room up a good hour ago... I'll bless you with my presence on your little sake outing."
"But Tsunade-sama, no one asked for your-" Ino began.
"Ah! Ah! Ah! You don't have to beg me, I'd love to go drinking!" She shouted, walking up to us and placing her hands firmly on Hinata's shoulders. "You'd love to have me there, too, right?"
And as expected, Hinata nodded firmly. Though, she probably wasn't lying. She was the type of person to enjoy anyone's company.
We made our way out of the door and around the curving hallway. As Tsunade and Ino chatted animatedly about random things and Hinata lent a supporting comment here and there, I allowed my mind to wander again.
I took in the glowing sunset, which had left its blazing golden hue and began to settle into a tender pink... Just like another time I remembered from a long time before then.
It was only about three months after the war had ended...
"But Sasuke!" I had called. "You still haven't told me what you mean by all this!"
He didn't pause in his walking or even seem to consider it for that matter. He sighed, sliding his hands into the pockets of his brand-new navy blue Konoha Shinobi pants and continued on the path toward the front of the village.
"I have told you." He replied. "It isn't my fault if you can't understand."
I grabbed his shoulder.
"Don't just leave me hanging, then. Explain it to me in a way that I will."
Finally, at the South Gate Entrance of Konoha, he slowed his walk, turning his head to me.
"You really mean to tell me you haven't noticed all the people that hound Naruto and I on a daily basis?"
I blinked hard.
Of course I noticed... That's why I'm next to you right now. To encourage the infected villagers to leave you alone.
My eyes flicked around, even then, there were two visiting Cloud ninja villagers eyeing Sasuke heavily. All across the five ninja nations, he and Naruto had been deemed the saviors and though that comes with pride, it also comes with a price.
The issue was that the Infinite Tsukuyomi was so particular to everyone's own personal interests. One person wants to be rich, done. The other person wants to have all the lovers in the world, done. But like a drug, it took hold of that person's brain, releasing chemicals into their blood stream that are normally only released when a person is experiencing extreme happiness...a thing called peace. Some people, ones who had the most traumatic lives, needed more of the drug than others... So they took more. While some people were in the genjutsu only for a couple of days or even hours in their mind, others were in there for years...
The worst patient Tsunade, Shizune and I received recounted growing to full manhood, marrying a woman, having three children and being close to resting on his deathbed right before he woke up. The total amount of time in years his mind recorded being in the genjutsu was a full lifespan, sixty good years. But the patient... The patient was only seven years old.
Instead of coming back to the real world whole, these men, women and children, held more steadfastly to the dream... Especially if, in their memories, the dream lasted longer than their real age, such as in the seven year old's case. He barely remembered anything when he awoke. That his parents were killed right before his eyes by Akatsuki member Kisame and he fled the Mist Village in fear, living off of raccoons and acorns in the wilderness from ages four until seven. But then, one night, he lifted the leaves he had poured over top of himself for warmth, crawled out of the leaky cave he'd holed up inside, pulled the bushes to the side and saw it ... The gigantic red moon taking up most of the sky. And he raised his eyes to it, gazing at it openly and suddenly... he was home, and his parents coddled him and his big sisters kissed him and it was like reality was the true dream. Or rather...reality was a nightmare.
I sighed.
"So that's what you're getting at..." I said, finally understanding. "Sasuke... Those people... Just ignore them, they're sick."
"They're lost." Sasuke replied. "And I know what it feels like to be lost."
I slid my hand down to his hand.
"I know how you're feeling. I have to treat those people all day long and more and more keep cropping up." I told him helplessly. "But it isn't as easy as you think! You don't even know what you're up against..."
I shook my head hard, voice quavering.
"How do you explain to someone that can recall his entire life as a boy with ease... Being adored by his little sisters, being spoiled by his mother and father, and living every second of his life with a silver spoon in his mouth." I swallowed. "How do you explain to that person that the entire life they remember living as this rich prince is all a lie and they're actually a...girl. A poor little farmer girl from the Grass Country...? How... How can anyone explain that?! It's... It's just..."
"It makes you think."
I paused, looking up at him as his eyes layered over the masses of trees beyond the Konoha gate.
"Makes you think that... Maybe some people have to be cajoled instead of coddled."
And immediately, I was shaking my head.
"Naruto's already proposed a plan that Tsunade's following." I told him. "He wants her to continue treating everyone with the brain chemicals. It's like a drug withdrawal that they're going through. If we slowly wean them off of it, we're hoping they'll come back. And if, after the five month roll-call, some people still can't return. He's decided to just...create a safe home for these people to just go back to sleep. You were there when we planned that."
He continued staring out silently and then turned, finally looking me in the eyes.
"This was the guy that said all the dreams were lies and anyone who believed in them was a coward." He said. "And now suddenly, he's giving them a shortcut. That's the man you want to believe in?"
This rivalry...
"Naruto is our comrade."
"That doesn't make him smart." Sasuke interjected. "I'm the one they should've consulted..."
And then he stepped away, pulling out of my grip.
It's like it'll never stop.
"Everything depends on the person's psyche." I went on, following him. "You can't force a person's mind to bend to your will. That's why the Infinite Tsukuyomi worked so well in the first place. Because the person creates it themselves but... If you're thinking to force this reality on them, they'll snap."
"Handing 'dream passes' out to people like candy is only going to encourage dissention at a time when we need people awake and coherent the most." He said. "You know that full and well, Sakura. Soon, everyone will start to feign 'sickness'. ...Who the hell actually wants to live in reality?"
He bit the corner of his lip tersely, something I noticed that he'd do when he was really agitated.
"Naruto cherishes reality above everything."
He didn't even hesitate before he responded.
"That's just because he doesn't know any better. People who have actually lost something before as opposed to never having anything to begin with. Those people are the ones who truly understand reality. He's just a common idiot preaching about things he doesn't understand."
I raised my eyebrows then. Surprised at his tone. Even though I'd seen Sasuke angry countless times after the war ended, it still surprised me. I put my arms around him, pulling him into my chest just as he passed the gate entrance.
He paused, probably more so because I was restraining him than because he actually wanted to.
It's always like this... You leaving and me hugging you from behind.
"Sakura..." He said quietly.
I let go of him, nodding.
"Uh, y-yeah..."
He glanced back at me, and I saw the deep red Rinnegan in his eye flick on momentarily before he enacted whatever teleportation technique he was able to use and disappeared. In the leaves and dust kicked off by his sudden departure, I stood there and...
"Sakura, really?"
"What?" I asked, blinking.
"What's your order? This nice waiter has had to ask about fifty thousand times."
I looked up at a man with smooth light blonde hair, shaved at the sides and softly spiked on his head.
"I'm sorry!" I told him. "Uh... You know what? Just water would be fine."
Amid all the loud complaints by Tsunade and Ino, who were both having two cups of sake, the waiter handed me a glass of water.
"Oh, it's fine." He said, smiling at me widely. "If I were as pretty as you are, I'd be spacing out, too. Probably about all the marriage proposals, right, Sakura-san?"
I blinked.
"Huh?" I asked, giving him a proper once-over. "You know my name?"
He nodded hard.
"Of course! You were the first face I saw when I truly woke up from that moon genjutsu."
Truly woke up...
I gazed into his golden eyes, suddenly coming to a distant memory of a guy who looked similar to him.
"I never got a chance to fully thank you." He said. "So...how about dinner?"
Ino laughed.
"Sorry, lover-boy! She's got a boyfriend." She declared.
"Crap... So that Uzumaki guy actually nailed you down, huh?" He asked. "Well, it's to be expected that a girl like you would end up with a hero like him. ...See you later."
Ino snickered as she sipped from her cup.
"Who wants to break it to the poor asshole that the guy he lost out to is actually the other 'hero'?"
"Who is less like a hero in people's eyes and more like a tolerable villain." Tsunade added.
I rolled my eyes.
"Sasuke's no villain..." I muttered, but then I cocked my head. "But Naruto... Really?"
"Well... When you guys are together, you do have a certain chemistry." Hinata said, seeming to choose her words carefully. "Many people probably think you two are..."
Hinata's tentative tone attracted my attention.
That's right... Hinata, you have feelings for Naruto, don't you?
She glanced at me and then looked down at the cup of tea she'd ordered.
I considered the word "chemistry" that she'd chosen, feeling like a deeper and more tender meaning was there but being unable to comprehend it.
"Right, and Sasuke on the other hand, it's rare anyone sees the two of you together." Ino pointed out. "It's like you're ashamed to take him places."
Yeah, right... More like the other way around.
"Speaking of you two, though... How is going anyway?" Tsunade asked, reaching for her third drink. "You barely talk about him."
But I think about him all day.
"He's fine." I replied.
Or that's what I tell myself.
"Let me just ask the question we all really want to know, what's the sex life like?" Ino wanted to know.
Hinata blushed furiously and Tsunade tried unsuccessfully to hold down a burst of laughter.
"Ehh... Well... You know, Sasuke would probably kill me if I told, so..." I replied easily.
"Hey, no one here is going to tell!" Ino promised me. "We're your friends."
And because of that true statement, my brain spun, quickly reeling for a cause.
"Well, it's fine." I responded, looking down at my water. "I don't really know how to explain it better than that..."
"Wait a second..." Ino gasped. "Wait, wait, wait... Could it be that you guys have never...?"
I said nothing, continuing to poke my water. I would've responded, if I had just one more spare second to come up with a lie but Ino beat me to it.
"It is, isn't it?!" She exclaimed.
Tsunade looked up from her fourth glass of sake, I expected her to be laughing along with Ino but instead she gave me a pensive look. A look I was too afraid to read behind.
"I mean, we're busy. Unlike some people, we don't have time to just mess around, Ino."
Literally...
"That's a bunch of bullshit. You're at his house for hours on end every day and that thought never once occurred to either of you?" She went on.
My heart beat sped up, unconsciously, I was tuning into the area around us. Counting the number of people total in the bar, eleven, and the number of people who could potentially overhear us, six, and the number of people who were actually looking over, called by Ino's loud tone, two. One of which, being the waiter who had asked me out.
I tapped my sweaty palms against the table.
"I mean, it's been three whole years, you should-" Ino tried to continue.
"But Ino, you and Sai are still in the beginning stages, too." Hinata interrupted.
Tsunade smiled, hopping after Hinata's change in conversation.
"That's true. Shouldn't you guys have all sorts of juicy stories?"
And suddenly, at the prospect of revealing gossip, Ino forgot all about me.
"I don't even know where to start!" She said, smiling, but she began anyway.
I had been somewhere between getting angry and arguing or feigning sickness but suddenly, there wasn't a need for any of that.
I looked over at Hinata and gave her a grateful smile and she smiled back. Understanding how to come to the defense of someone in social strains since she had been in that position for most of her childhood, being the shyest one of us all.
But Ino's words didn't fall on deaf ears at all. I used the time I was given with no one paying attention to me to day dream again. About the first time I came to Sasuke's apartment near nighttime unannounced.
It was a year after the war ended...
I turned the knob, pushing his door open and being met with the soft scent of lavender and lilac, which were caused by a pot of flowers next to the door. His apartment was a straight shot to the bedroom, past the kitchen and a bathroom, and his door was open.
"Sasuke?" I called.
Something shifted and as I entered the room, I saw that he'd closed a book on the desk next to his bed.
He turned to me slowly. And my eyes flicked over him, chest bare because his navy blue shirt was hanging on the rack and wearing nothing but black pants.
"Those flowers next to the door..." I said, setting a cloth bag on his desk. "Were they a gift?"
"I don't garden. Naruto brought them." He replied.
Naruto?
I felt relief spreading through me.
That's good. I almost thought it was another woman. Though... That'd be kind of impossible. It's not like it was in the past. Girls in the village are all after Naruto now.
He eyed the bag.
"What are you doing here?"
"I thought since you keep declining to come have dinner with Naruto and I, I'd bring it to you."
"I can cook for myself."
"What's that got to do with anything?" I asked.
I pulled the cloth down off of the container and popped it open.
"It's curry chicken with a side of diced tomatoes. I made it myself." I told him. "I know how much you like it."
He stared down at it for a second and then looked up at me.
"...Thank You."
A warm feeling settled in my stomach and I blushed.
"Well...eat it first, then you can thank me."
He picked up the chopsticks and began digging in. As he did, I walked around the room. Everything was organized. Not one thing was out of place. Even his bed was made. Whenever I went to Naruto's house, I spent almost the majority of our time together cleaning his messes. I was also a pretty neat person but when it came to my bed or my shoes, I couldn't care less what it looked like or where they went. Sasuke almost seemed anal about it.
Other than that, Naruto had pictures of all of us up everywhere, some taken recently, some taken in the past, but Sasuke's walls were all bare.
"Whatever happened to your copy of our class portrait on our first day as ninja?"
He paused momentarily to swallow one of his last bites and then shook his head.
"I gave it to Naruto. His was destroyed during the blast in Pain's Invasion."
I paused near his dresser where only one thing lay on top. A headband with the leaf symbol etched in the sliver metal.
"Why don't you swap this out for one that's undamaged?" I asked.
He stood up from his desk, carrying the empty container to the trashcan just outside of his bedroom door.
"It's a symbol." He said, as I turned it over in my fingers.
"A symbol of why it's not good to fight your friends?" I asked jokingly.
But he didn't crack a smile, instead, he stopped next to me, pulling the head band out of my grasp and putting it onto a higher shelf.
"A reminder of the alternative."
He sat up on his bed, pulling himself down into a lying position.
"The alternative... Like leaving Konoha again? You'd do that?"
"No." He replied. "That's exactly why I keep the headband. As a symbol against breaking what I believe in to chase someone else's will."
It was then, while I was staring down at him lying across his bed that the thought came to me. Initially, it was innocent. I liked his response to that question. It sounded noble and sturdy and I had been convincing myself that if I was going to be attracted to Sasuke it had to be for the right reasons. Because I actually liked the person he was. So, I began to try to get to know him, in a slightly selfish way.
"That book you were reading..." I said, pointing to it. "You're still trying to find a way to help the 'sick' ones, right?"
"I already know how I'm going to help them." He said. "That's a book on political thesis's."
"...Run that by me one more time?"
He sighed, the way he always did when he had to explain something in detail.
"Do you really think the five ninja nations are just going to get along peacefully forever?"
"No, but it's better than warring, isn't it?"
"That's an idealistic way of thinking. In reality, military villages, like Konoha, are run by feudal lords. In reality, they can wage a war with another land at any point in time if they choose." He said. "And also in reality, war happens more often than peace ever did."
"So... Being Hokage is pointless." I stated, plopping down on the bed next to him.
"That's incorrect. It's still the most important job, because a Hokage has the power to influence the entire military of nation one way or another. And, in reality, less people live completely isolated from ninja and military districts than the opposite. Hokage's have a lot of power."
"So, what's your point?"
"Even though Hokage's have a lot of power, that doesn't mean they have all the power. Danger is always on the horizon in a situation like that. However, if we can change that, get the Hokage's to have all the power, then, it'll only be a few paces before we can..."
"Can what?"
His eyes which had been on the ceiling, flicked over to me.
"Change the world." He replied. "By uniting all five ninja nations into one full, permanent nation with one leader."
I couldn't help but grin.
"I can't believe you!" I said, pointing at him. "And let me guess, you're going to be the leader of all those nations, right?"
"Naturally."
"You're power hungry."
"I'm being logical."
"Naruto wouldn't-"
"Naruto is naïve." He interrupted.
He frowned slightly, looking back up at the ceiling.
"And he's also too trusting. He's the type of guy to sit in a situation as long as it's comfortable and never premeditate. Someone with no intellect like him... How could they ever be Hokage?"
"It's just like you said before, Hokage's use their power by swaying the opinion of the masses of ninja. Naruto might not be the brightest, but you have to admit... He's very charismatic. He's always been able to change the opinions of people... That's what makes him special."
He said nothing, continuing to look up at the ceiling with his hands behind his head. I moved closer and leaned over him.
"Don't be upset with me." I said, pushing my fingers through his hair.
He stayed quiet, and without much else I could think of doing, I let myself down onto the bed next to him, pressing my face into his bare chest.
"Sakura-"
"Tell me something, would you?" I asked. "What will you do when your term is over and it's time for someone else to become Hokage?"
Hopefully not pull a Madara and try to rule forever.
"Someone else can have it." He replied. "By that time, the regulations I'll want will already be in place."
"Sasuke... Why do you want to do all this?"
He was silent for a while. He'd never really gone in deeply about why he wanted to become Hokage. Everyone asked him constantly for hours on end but he would just tell them the obvious... "Because I want control."
"I need to create a better world where what happened to my brother Itachi and my clan will never happen again." He said.
Because of the honestly of that sentence, I couldn't help but want to reward him for it. Like giving a kid candy for answering a question right. So, I lifted my head to him and pressed my lips against his smooth cheek. I felt him go stiff next to me and as I stopped, he didn't waste a second pulling away from me.
Wordlessly, he stood up, grabbing the book at his desk and sitting back down. That was the first time I stayed over his apartment through the night... But just because I was in the room, didn't mean I was anywhere near him.
I raised my eyes from the ground as we all walked home in the early night dark blue. Children ran past us with fire sparklers and adults sat in the plaza or on porches, gazing at the fireflies or having a popsicle. I turned to Ino who hadn't stopped talking since she started and wondered what it meant to have a boyfriend. Was it just someone you spent most of your time with? Someone you spent a lot of time talking to? Or was it about the intimacy. The closeness. What separated a friend from a lover?
"Okay, ladies." Ino said. "I'm going home to pack, if you want to come over, you're welcome."
Hinata nodded.
"I'll do the same. Meeting at the North Entrance?"
I grinned.
"Yup. Make sure you remind the boys to start early. Knowing them..."
"Yeah, Shikamaru's going to need like five hours." Ino groaned, walking off.
"And Shino's insects take so long to get his stuff together." Hinata added, turning to her own path.
"So... What'll you do?" Tsunade asked me, as we were the only two left.
I shrugged.
"Go see if Sasuke still really doesn't want to come and then pack for Naruto since I'm sure he expects me to anyway."
She rolled her eyes.
"I'm talking about Sasuke."
I stared at her, she stared back.
"You know... The worst burden a woman can ever bare is decision to let a man go."
I blinked at her rapidly, wanting to ask what she was talking about, even though I understood her full and well but she went on.
"You're missing out on other opportunities you could have if you could get your head out of the clouds."
"Who? That waiter?" I asked, shrugging. "He'll live."
"You know who I'm talking about." She said, then she reached out, placing a hand on my head, a tender action she'd begun to take up when I was younger. "Open your eyes, honey."
She gave me a knowing look. I turned away from her wordlessly, slowly making my way down the path that led to Sasuke's apartment and enjoying the warm breezes floating by.
That day when I brought him dinner, almost a full two years before, was the last time I'd ever gotten that close to Sasuke again. Every time I came over, he made sure to be in a position where I couldn't engage him easily. Most of the time we spent together was wasted with me watching him work or bringing my own work to do.
I lowered my head as I walked under the white, cloth Uchiha flag Sasuke had hanging from the bench above his apartment entrance. Funnily enough, I was the one that hung it, not him. It bothered me that his apartment was so bland and empty looking.
"Sasuke?" I called, pushing the door open.
He was in the kitchen, which was in direct line of sight from the front door and didn't even turn to look at me. I wondered if it was because he was so used to my presence or if he was bothered by something.
"Didn't have time to make dinner. Sorry." I told him, closing the door. "I got pretty caught up with the girls."
He sat at the small, round table in the center of the kitchen, tipping the edge of a bowl toward him and away from him. The warm breezes from the window floated in, ruffling the curtains and somehow feeling cold as they reached me.
"Or...maybe I could just whip something together with what you have." I said tentatively.
"I'm not hungry." He replied, still staring at the table.
"Well... What are you, then?"
He remained silent. I walked over to the stove next to him, deciding to just prepare something small anyway.
"Are you going on Naruto's Party Trip with us?" I asked him.
"Do you even have to ask?"
I grabbed one of his frying pans.
"Naruto would like it if you came."
"I couldn't care less about what Naruto would like."
"You're being selfish."
He dropped the bowl, allowing it to clatter on the table without shattering.
"I'm being the most selfless one out of us all." He argued. "Naruto's not the only person that saved the world. None of us would even be here if it wasn't for me."
I sighed as I put the pan over the fire.
"I know that."
"And now I'm trying to create a long-term plan that could help not just my clan or this village, but everyone in the entirety of the five ninja nations..." He muttered. "Instead of me, they want the idiot with no plan."
"We've gone over this a thousand times-"
"I know. He's charismatic. He's always been loyal to the village. He's trustworthy."
I grinned.
"Right. And you're just the cold, callous bastard that has a chronic backstabbing issue."
"That was in the past."
"Well, you know how people are with the 'past'. You can say and do all kinds of things that people forget. But oddly, people never really forget how you made them feel." I explained to him. "Even after they've forgotten what the whole issue was about, they'll still hate you on principle. Unless you do something that makes you seem sincerely apologetic."
I cocked my head as I opened his refrigerator and pulled more ingredients out.
"Didn't you say your partners in crime were having a similar issue? Karin and the rest of them..."
He remained silent, making it perfectly clear he hadn't listened to a word I'd said.
"You and Naruto are a perfect pair, you know." I spoke up. "There's a reason why he can corral the crowd and you can prepare the plan. It's because you're two pieces of a perfect whole."
I poured the oil into the pan, along with the bag of chilled, diced tomatoes.
"It would be one thing if that was what Tsunade said when she picked Naruto."
"What did she say?"
"That my character was faulty. And that people who want power are always the worst people to obtain it." He scoffed. "And somehow Naruto is more qualified for the job because the reason he wants it has nothing to do with power."
He frowned.
"I spend hours trying to explain to people the complexities of the situation. Why seeking power isn't a bad thing unless your intent is off. Power is the building block of change."
"The issue is your ideology is different." I replied, draining the fried tomatoes I'd made for his snack and placing them in the bowl he was still prodding. "Naruto believes that love causes change."
"Has that ever been true historically?
"I've read all the history books you're referring to." I smiled. "Actually, I read them eons ago. When I was eleven or twelve years old. I know what the world is like historically. But isn't that what change is? Making it so that history doesn't matter."
And oddly, he smirked.
"You're just like everyone else." He said, grabbing a tomato slice. "Idealism is like poison. And you can't change human nature just because you cry for someone or say a bunch of stupid words."
"It seems to have worked for Naruto so far."
"Whatever..."
Privately, it irked me that he said I was like everyone else. I leaned against the counter, reaching over, playing with the strands of his hair that fell so delicately over his ears. He grabbed another slice.
"These taste just like my mother's..." He said quietly.
I lowered my hand to his cheek.
"Sasuke... Did you notice anything different about me?"
"No."
"You're not even looking."
"I looked at you earlier." He replied, pulling his face away from me.
"I'm growing my hair out."
He said nothing, continuing to eat. The same guy who swore up and down he wasn't hungry.
"Do you even care?"
"What does your hair have to do with me?"
I sighed, bending down to his level and turning his chin toward me.
"Okay... What's my favorite color?"
"That doesn't have anything to do with me either." He replied, staring at me blankly.
"That doesn't mean you shouldn't know it. I know your favorite colors."
"I don't even have favorite colors."
"Exactly! And I know that!"
"Why are you angry all of a sudden?"
"I'm not. It's just..." I straightened up, pulling his head toward me and hugging him. "...I want an honest answer. What am I to you?"
I hugged him tighter.
"A stranger... A sister... A friend... Or...?"
He was silent for a while. It was like the longest silence of my life. I pulled back, moving my head into his line of sight.
"Sasuke... Would you call me your girlfriend?"
"Isn't that what you tell people you are to me anyway?"
Not necessarily... Ino just knows how often I stay here and she talks a lot. Other people don't bother to ask and assume things. No one really knows the inner workings of our relationship. That behind his closed apartment door, if I don't speak to him, the silence will cave in on us and suffocate me like an avalanche of darkness.
But instead of saying any of that, I tilted his chin up again and quickly, before he could avoid it, I leaned down pressing my lips to his gently.
He jerked back, pressing down into the chair.
"Sakura, you're...too close."
I put my knee up on the seat next to him and stroked his cheek.
"Not as close as most girlfriends are." I replied, jokingly.
I went for his lips, kissing him again and I could feel his jaw hardening, his hands grabbing at the arm rests, and the rest of his entire body going completely rigid.
I pulled back, focusing on his pants, where a button kept his pants together.
"I don't have time to-"
"Just relax."
"Sakura..."
My left hand, which had been on his knee, slid up to the button as his hands lifted, anxiously pushing against me.
"I can't..."
I unbuttoned his pants.
"I can't do this..."
I pulled his zipper down.
"GET OFF ME!"
It happened so quickly, if someone asked me, I'd be telling the truth if I said one minute I was looking down at him and the next minute I was looking up.
But as the feeling settled in my body, my hand shot up to my cheek, gingerly touching the place where he'd hit me with the back of his hand.
He stood up, staring down at me irritably and cracked his knuckles.
"What the hell is wrong with you today?"
Another feeling that began to settle was warm and slow to come into my consciousness but the moment it did, I knew what it was. Tears... Suddenly sliding profusely down my cheeks.
And the moment he saw them, he immediately turned his eyes to the right.
"...What is it?" I asked quietly.
His fingers curled into his palms.
"Sasuke... What am I doing wrong?"
But he still wouldn't look at me.
"Why can't you..." I trailed off, losing my words in the abyss of darkness I felt surrounding us.
And suddenly, far earlier than either of us were ready for, the front door swung open.
"Sakura!" That carefree voice I'd know anywhere called. "I thought you were packing my stuff. Where are you?"
He walked into the room, grinning widely with his hands on his head.
"Well, I did it all myself now, so-"
He cut himself off abruptly. Perhaps it was the fact that I was still crying, or maybe the fact that Sasuke was in the process of zipping his pants up. But he was put on complete guard.
"What's going on?" He asked, eyes flicking between us.
I rubbed my eyes on the back of my shirt sleeve and got to my feet.
"I was just about to come over there, Naruto." I said. "Sorry."
I walked around him, heading toward the door.
"What about my trip? You're still coming right?"
With everything that had happened, I'd almost completely forgotten about that.
But... I was planning to stay with Sasuke so that he wouldn't be alone again.
I turned slightly, eyes locking on Sasuke who had looked up at me and abruptly averted his eyes again and then on Naruto whose eyes were wide and hopeful.
I nodded.
"Y-Yeah... Let me get myself ready. I'll meet you at the village gates."
And then I slammed the door shut and broke into a run, a run that was only accompanied by a chilly breeze, a chipper moon and chastising tears that only ended once I reached home and had to put on a face for my parents.
"Sakura, is that you?" My dusty pink haired father asked me on my way to my bedroom.
"Yeah, Dad."
"Coming back from Sasuke's, eh?" He assumed. "How's he doing?"
"He's...doing great. Just great."
"Glad to hear it."
Fine. Fine. We're all doing so fine... Fine, if it weren't for the fact that every opportunity he gets...he rejects me...