TITLE: Eye for an Eye

AUTHOR: LOTSlove®

CHARACTERS: Richard / Kahlan

RATING: R/M

WARNINGS: Author Chooses Not to Use Warnings

TIMELINE: Anything up through S2

DISCLAIMER: I'm completely obsessed with the show Legend of the Seeker and all things Richard and Kahlan. I love to write about them even though they cancelled my show and now I'm fighting to get it back!

SUMMARY: Sequel to my fic Deception, Richard deals with the death of his son Michael while an enemy seeks revenge.

Chapter 1

A thick heavy mist blanketed the entire landscape as far as the eye could see, hiding the majestic mountains as well as the People's Palace that stood somewhere in the distance as a dark smudge on the horizon. Not even dawn's early morning rays could penetrate through the heavy mist that had descended upon the entire area during the night.

She stood staring out over the extensive stretch of plains, the tall grasses that she knew was there concealed behind the white curtain of fog that shielded it. There was something so cold and dismal about the fog despite the warmth that spring had brought to the air. It seemed to only expand the frozen wasteland that occupied the spot where her heart had once beat.

She wrapped her arms around herself, her gaze narrowing with the hatred that oozed through her veins. She wanted to just charge into the Palace, find Richard Rahl and slit his throat, ending his life once and for all. She wanted Kahlan to feel her pain, the utter loneliness and devastation that consumed her now that Sabinus was gone by that Confessor witch's hands.

But Sangria knew that she couldn't. Even with her powerful magical abilities, she wouldn't get that deep into the Palace without being stopped by those faithfully guarding the royal family. It was too heavily guarded now especially with her still wandering free.

It made no difference, though. She had formed an alliance, one that even her own twin brother Sabinus hadn't known about. It was something she had sought out on her own, keeping Sabinus in the dark. She knew he would've had a horrible fit if he had known what she had secretly been planning.

She still didn't have the powerful twins that she had wanted, but she had new plan in mind now, one that would still ensure success. Despite their anger at first with her lack of success, her alliance had been more than interested in her new plan to get revenge, ensuring they would still both win in the end.

In fact, their plan should begin falling into place very soon. She was going to have to be alert, keep an eye on things here. As soon as things were finally set into motion, she needed to be ready to act.

Sangria smiled to herself. This was far from over. Richard and Kahlan would never begin to expect what was about to come this time.

XXX

Cara sat staring down at the little boy in her arms nursing at her breast, rocking him gently as she held him. He seemed so small to her, so fragile, but he was theirs and that was all that mattered.

She lightly ran her finger against his check, amazed at how much their son resembled his father. She had never had anything win her heart so readily, so completely as this baby cradled in her arms. Even Garren had taken at least a few weeks to actually capture her heart and even longer than that for her to admit it.

But this boy had reached right into her heart with his first cry, his first gasp of breath, the moment he opened his eyes and looked at her – he was completely and wholly hers.

And it terrified her to no end.

This little life, so helpless and so dependent upon her, scared the life out of her. She had no idea how to be a mother, how to raise a child. Her last baby had been taken away from her the moment he had been born. She'd heard him wail his protest at being thrust out into the cold world only to be spirited away, never to be seen again.

Tears pricked her eyes as she suddenly thought about it, wondered what had ever happened to him. She didn't have to think too long or hard though. In her heart, she knew that he had been smothered, kept from becoming a future threat to the reigning Lord Darken Rahl.

Her little baby…her first born…so helpless to fight for himself and she had done absolutely nothing to save him, to protect him from his fate. She had walled off her heart, healed from the damage of giving birth and sent right back into the service of the Lord Rahl, but had never truly been healed from the horrific pain that she'd endured.

Instead, she'd forced herself to forget, pushing it all into the deepest darkest recesses of her heart and mind never to be dealt with again. Until now. The birth of her son Caiden had awakened a grief so deep she couldn't begin to face it, couldn't even comprehend it.

What kind of a woman…mother…was she to allow them to take her baby, knowing what they were going to do to him. Had she been that devoid of emotion, that cold-hearted and broken that she could just move on with her life and never once grieve for what had happened to her…to him?

Looking down at Caiden through tear-filled eyes, Cara drew a shuddering breath. As desperately as she loved him, she was terrified of failing him, afraid that she was never meant to be a mother. She never stood up for her first son. Would she be able to do what was necessary for Caiden?

Garren silently slipped into the nursery, watching his wife nursing his son. He didn't think that he had ever seen a more beautiful image. He could scarcely believe that the good spirits had seen fit to allow him such an amazing wife and then on top of that to have a beautiful son with her.

It was more than he could comprehend sometimes. It was everything that he had ever wanted. Caiden was only two weeks old and was already beginning to gain a little weight. He was beyond relieved that although premature, he was healthy in every way.

Garren made his way to Cara in the rocking chair, kneeling down beside her to watch his son. Sensing his presence, Cara quickly wiped her eyes and nose, not wanting him to know that she had been crying. She detested crying, feeling it was a sign of weakness, of being unable to control her emotions.

Garren, however, quickly picked up on the fact. "Cara, what's wrong?" he gently asked, placing a hand on the back of her neck. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm fine," she whispered, afraid to test her voice.

She kept her focus on Caiden, refusing to make eyes contact with her handsome husband. She feared that one look into his eyes would cause her to completely breakdown altogether. He would really think that his wife had lost it if that happened.

She rarely ever cried and if she did, no one was ever allowed to witness it.

"Cara, you can talk to me about anything," he pressed, rubbing her neck. "You know that, right?"

"Yes, of course," she quickly replied, keeping her responses short and quick.

Garren wasn't having any of it. He shifted to kneel in front of her, his hands finding her knees. "I love you, Cara," he told her. "If something is wrong, I want to know so I can help you. I can't stand seeing you in pain."

Cara finally met his earnest gaze, the love swimming in his eyes finding her heart and making it race. He never ceased to awaken a need so fierce that lived so deep within her. She wanted to tell him what she was struggling with, but feared that he would agree with her. She couldn't bear the thought of him thinking that she wasn't a good mother.

"I'm just happy," she murmured, wiping away a stray tear that had suddenly broken free. "I was so afraid we were going to lose him."

Garren stared at her for a long moment, sensing there was more to it than this, but also didn't want to press her too much further. "Caiden is safe now," he gently said as he caressed her knee. "He's healthy and perfect and he's ours. And I will do everything in my power to make sure it stays that way."

"I know," she forced a smile through the remnants of her tears. "I love you, Garren."

Leaning up, Garren kissed her softly, savoring the feel of her lips against his. He could hardly wait to be with her again, but knew it would be a little while longer. Until then, he was content with just being able to hold her and kiss her.

Caiden began to squirm and cry, wanting his parent's attention back on him instead of each other. Garren pulled back to look down at his son, his large hand gently caressing the top of his head. He leaned down, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"Take care of your mother for me while I'm gone, okay little guy?" he told his son.

Cara smiled despite herself, a true smile that brightened her face. "Little guy?" she repeated. "You're going to give our son a complex and he's only two weeks old."

"He'll always be my little guy even if he grows up to be taller than his father," he replied in feigned indignation.

Cara chuckled softly at his words. "I'm sure he's going to love to hear that when he's a young man," she shook her head in amusement.

"Well, I'll work on coming up with something better later," he shrugged as he got to his feet. "Right now, I still have a seer to find."

Cara noted the definite angry tone that filled his voice. Sangria had yet to be found, causing Garren to be more frustrated than usual. He was angered by what had happened on the twin's birthday, causing her to go into premature labor. He was very protective of Richard and Kahlan, their children as well as Cara.

"She'll show up eventually," Cara told him as she adjusted her nightgown. Standing to her feet, she began to pat Caiden's back. "I have a bad feeling she hasn't gone very far."

"I don't think so either," he grimly admitted. "Zedd thinks that she has likely escaped the Palace already, but Holland, Richard, and I think she's still lingering around her somewhere. The problem is her magic makes it difficult. With a single touch, she can scramble your brain and make you forget you even saw her."

"You'll find her," she reassured him, leaning in and kissing him softly. "She'll make a mistake and you'll be there to catch her."

"I hope it's before she can do any more harm," he sighed heavily, kissing her once more before turning to leave. "I'll be back to check on you two later. Be sure to rest while I'm gone."

"Don't worry about us," she shook her head.

"Right," he frowned. "Like that's ever going to happen."

Cara couldn't help the small smile that tugged at her lips. She loved him more than she had ever loved any man. She couldn't bear the thought of ever losing him.

XXX

Kahlan silently made her way through the Lord and Lady Rahl's private garden, the morning fog that seemed like wisps of cotton creating an eerie feeling. Despite the warmer air, she couldn't stop the shiver that suddenly raced through her. She rubbed her arms, not quite certain what had caused the chill all of the sudden.

She'd had an unsettling feeling ever since the whole horrifying incident with Sangria and Sabinus Dorst. She never wanted to go through anything like that ever again. Watching her children being taken away from her like that had been one of the most terrifying experiences of her entire life.

The fact that Sangria had yet to be found did little to settle her fears in any way. She wanted that woman found soon before she tried anything else against her family. She would kill her before she ever harmed her children again.

Kahlan couldn't help the constant fear that she carried now. It opened her eyes to the fact that her family was now a very real target for those who wanted to destroy them. She had grown used to being a target, having grown up as a Confessor and then travelling with Richard on their quests.

Their lives had always been in constant danger, one threat or another always coming at them, but now she had children…powerful children. Paige, Priya and Aiden were the most powerfully gifted children to have ever been born. It made her shiver again, fear welling up like a bitter fountain inside of her.

It also awakened her rage. She would die before she let anyone take her children away from them. Looking down, she found her hands balled into fists, her fingernails digging painfully into her palms. She immediately released her hands, taking a deep breath in order to calm herself.

She had come out here to find Richard, knowing that this was where he would be. She had woken early this morning finding his side of the bed empty again just as it had been the last several mornings. She hated waking up alone, not having him there beside her to kiss her, make love with her.

It had worried her at first when she couldn't find him until she had finally figured out where he had been going. Making her way to a bench not far away, she found her worry for him was still there just as it had been the first morning she had found him gone.

With every passing day, Richard was struggling more and more with Michael's death. She felt so helpless watching him work through this, not letting her in to help him through it. She had let it go at first, giving him some space and time to deal with it on his own, hoping that he would eventually come to her with his grief and pain.

But things weren't changing. It only seemed to be getting worse. He was keeping her at arms' length, not letting her in and she didn't understand why. They had been through so much together, survived more than any two people alive. They were best friends, soul-mates in every way. Why didn't he feel he could talk to her now?

She had finally followed him yesterday morning out here, secretly watching as he sat before Michael's small grave. He had sat there for what felt like forever, just sitting and thinking. No tears were shed, no word spoken. Just silence and deep hurting.

Settling down on the bench now, Kahlan spotted Richard through the misty morning fog that attempted to keep things hidden. She could see him kneeling before Michael's grave, that same pained expression gracing his face that she had witnessed yesterday.

She felt tears prick her eyes at the sight of him, her heart breaking for him all over again. She ached to go to him and wrap her arms around him, to tell him she loved him and would always be here for him. But she knew she couldn't.

All she could do now was let him know that she was there for him if he needed her, her silent support hopefully reaching beyond the wall of grief and pain that he was erecting around himself, shielding himself from her.

While it hurt her deeply to watch him slowly pulling away from her and into himself, there was a small part of her that understood. How many times had she pulled away from him over the years, needing to deal with things in her heart and mind in her way, in her own time?

But he had always been there for her, silently waiting and hoping…hurting…while she tried to figure things out on her own before coming to him with it. And she would be there for him now, quietly waiting and hoping and hurting and knowing that their love would only grow stronger because of it.

Kneeling before Michael's grave, Richard stared at the small headstone before him, memorizing every detail, every thin twisting line in the finely polished marble, the gentle slope of the curved top, the subtle changes in the blue undertones in the stone.

It felt like this was the least he could for the little boy who had been his son and yet he had never truly known, never truly sired. He hadn't even told Michael that he was his father, acknowledged him fully as his son. Didn't he at least owe him this? To wallow in his failure? His guilt?

Punishing himself, forcing himself every day to face the horror of what had happened seemed like the least he could do for a little boy who didn't deserve what had happened to him. Even though he should have never been created, never should have been born, he never deserved to die at such a young age.

He had never truly accepted him as his son, as flesh of his flesh and blood of his blood. He had never truly loved him like he loved his other children, the ones that he had created with Kahlan. Why couldn't he have just accepted Michael, tried to view him as truly his? What kind of a man…father…was he?

He should have done more, fought harder to find a cure to save his life. Wouldn't he have gone to the very ends of the earth for Paige, Priya, or Aiden? Why wasn't he willing to leave the People's Palace to save this little boy who had looked just like him?

His heart began to grow hard with the bitterness and self-loathing twisting inside of him, knowing that he had failed this little boy who had lost his life. Even though his death had helped save Kahlan's father's life, it did little to ease the guilt that he now bore.

With a heavy sigh of failure, Richard finally stood to his feet, not sure how long he had stayed this time. All he knew was that he had important matters that required his attention. He ran his fingers lightly over the small headstone that rested beneath the shade of a large tree.

"I'll be back tomorrow, Michael," he softly told him.

Turning, Richard suddenly spotted Kahlan sitting on a bench, a beautiful spirit partially obscured in the gauzy morning mist that attempted to conceal her presence from him. His heart leapt in his chest at the very sight of her, longing for her springing up anew deep within his core.

Spirits, he loved her, wanted her so desperately. It had been far too long. He didn't deserve this breathtaking woman, the children that she had given him. If she knew his thoughts…his heart…she wouldn't look at him with the love that was shining in her bright blue eyes now. She wouldn't want him near her at all.

The thought of losing her or her love for him terrified him out of his mind. He didn't want her to know the deep struggles that he was dealing with, the terrible guilt he carried over Michael's death. He knew that she was worried about him, but he needed to deal with this on his own right now, come to terms with his failure.

For some reason, Kahlan didn't feel that he had failed in anything. She only looked at him like the hero she always believed him to be. He felt like he was anything but that, so unworthy of the titles that he carried.

He slowly made his way to her, wishing more than anything that he could just disappear into the fog, but he knew that she had seen him too. He couldn't avoid her now. Approaching her, he didn't say a word as he sat down on the bench beside her.

They sat in tense silence for several long moments before he finally turned to face her. "Thank you, Kahlan," he whispered.

"For what?" she asked, her brow furrowed in confusion.

"For just being here," he softly replied, quickly looking away from her.

"I'm here when you're ready, Richard," she gently told him. "I'll always be here."

Richard nodded his head in understanding, suddenly unable to make his voice work. Without looking, he reached over and took her hand in his, squeezing it tightly. He sat there with her in the peaceful serenity of morning for a long time, just holding her hand and absorbing her love for him, her strength.

He hoped someday he'd be able to tell her…and that she'd still love him anyway.