Don't Deserve You

Pairing: Roy and Thea

Rating: M

Summary: Takes place in Birds of Prey when Oliver tells Roy he needs to leave Thea. My take on the Roy/Oliver and Roy/Thea part of the episode. Inspired by a video I saw on YouTube.

Beta: plainjanedee

~A~

At the Arrow cave

"You okay?" Oliver asked cautiously, as he pulled out a chair and took a seat opposite a scowling and frustrated Roy.

Chuckling bitterly while removing the bandage from his hand, the younger man answered in a clipped, annoyed tone, "Yeah. By this time tomorrow, it'll be like nothing happened," he paused to inspect his nearly-healed hand then glanced up at a concerned Oliver. "That's one upside of the Mirakuru."

Leaning forward, his mentor said in a stern and strong voice, "The only one."

Sighing dejectedly and shaking his head, Roy closed his eyes. "Look, I know what you're gonna say," a brief moment of silence passed between them before he looked up at the man before him. "I had it under control last night."

"Yeah, so under control that I almost had to put another arrow in you," Oliver countered, mockingly.

"I was gonna back off but you never gave me the chance," Roy shot back, defensively.

Not prepared to listen to his excuses, Oliver retorted stubbornly, "The only thing that snapped you out of it was when I brought up Thea."

Expelling a breath of disbelief, the younger man chuckled in realization. "That's why you called me Speedy," he stopped, shook his head and continued. "I-I thought your were trying to give me a nickname," he admitted, averting his gaze down to his hands. "But for the record, don't call me Speedy."

"Noted," Oliver replied quickly.

A pregnant moment of quietness stretched between them before Oliver took a deep breath, and mentally steeled himself for the reaction he knew was to come. "Roy...you're dangerous...I thought I was helping you control it bu-"

"You are," Roy interjected, intently. "I mean, I can look at a bowl of water without slapping it; that's progress, right?"

Sighing in frustration at Roy's blatant ignorance and his amused tone, Oliver pressed his lips into a long thin line and looked directly at the troubled younger man. "And yet, the first time you're out in the field for weeks...you're ready to kill somebody? C'mon," he said, unimpressed. "I'm sorry, I should've asked you to do this months ago."

A frown line marred Roy's forehead as he raised a brow in confusion, "Asked me to do what?"

"Stay away from Thea."

Roy's face instantly drained of all colour and his blood ran cold. "What?" His voice was a panicked whisper. "You can't be serious?"

"I don't see any other choice, Roy. You're dangerous and I have to protect my sister."

"And I have to protect my girlfriend!" He threw right back as white-hot rage soared through his veins. Pushing up forcefullyfrom his chair, he yelled, "You know I'd never hurt Thea, she's everything to me!"

Remaining calm and collected in his seat, Oliver nodded in understanding but continued on. "You think I want this? You think I want to break her heart?"

"Then don't fucking ask me to do this!" Roy slammed his fist down onto the steel table in unbridled anger, his entire body shaking uncontrollably.

Cursing to himself, he began to pace the length of the room frantically, while willing himself to calm down; to prove to Oliver that he could do this. He could be out in the field with the rest of the team, and still be with Thea. But the more he thought about it, the more his temper rose.

"I love her. You can't ask me to do this," he ground out through gritted teeth. "I-I can't survive without her. She's the only thing that's kept me sane during all of this. Please, don't take that from me," Roy turned and pierced Oliver with a helpless, terrified look. "Don't take her from me, please. I can do this. Just...just let me prove it to you."

Determined to stick to his guns, Oliver held firm. "She's not safe when she's around you. I'm not sure anybody is, when you lose yourself to this rage," he explained gently, meanwhile every word slowly and excruciatingly shredded Roy's heart. "You love her, and that's why you'll do what I'm asking. It's better this way."

"Better for who, exactly?" Roy spat, as his heart threatened to break within his chest. "You say you wanna protect her, yet you're perfectly okay with letting me break her heart?" Stepping closer to him, Roy pushed further, "How is that protecting her?! You wanna keep her safe? Teach me something that I can actually use in the field! I have the skills, let me utilise them!"

"Roy, I won't discuss this any further with you."

"Tough shit! Because I've sure as hell got a few things I need to say to you!"

"Roy," Diggle said in warning.

Holding out a hand in thanks, Oliver nodded to his friend before turning back to heartbroken man before him. "No, I'd be the same if I were in his position, but I'd also do what I'd been asked because deep down, I'd know that I wasn't stable enough to be around her."

Unwilling to listen, Roy continued to tremble with anger. "I'd do anything you asked of me, you all know that, but like hell will I lose the woman I love. I've never felt this way about anyone, Queen, and you want me to throw that away? Give up what I have with Thea?" He asked, incredulously. "No. I'm sorry, but, no. So if this is how it's going down, you might wanna put that arrow in me now, because putting me six feet under is the only way you'll get me to leave her."

Clenching his jaw tightly, Oliver narrowed his eyes into a squint. "Don't do this, Harper. Don't be foolish."

At that, Roy whipped around and nailed Oliver with his own murderous glare, "Oh, I'm not. For once in my life, I'm actually thinking clearly."

"You don't wanna do this, Roy," Diggle advised, looking at him sympathetically.

With his eyes darting back and forth between the two men standing before him, Roy clenched his fingers into fists and worked his jaw in agitation. The anger he felt was coursing through his body like wildfire. It wouldn't take much for him to snap, so the best thing he could do, the only thing he could do, was leave.

Grabbing his red hoodie from the chair, Roy stormed past Oliver and Diggle, shoving them both backward in his fury and muttered an incensed, "Fuck this," before yanking the door open and slamming it shut behind him.

~A~

Several hours later, after storming out of the Arrow cave, without giving a second thought as to where in the hell he was going, Roy found himself pacing the cold and eerie streets of Starling. Every time he closed his eyes all he could see was Thea's beautiful face. Scrubbing his hands over his face in helpless frustration, Roy gulped thickly and ground his teeth and fists together in an attempt to lessen the ache he felt in his chest, but no matter what he did, nothing seemed to work. If anything, the mere thought of what he was being forced to do only made him angrier.

~A~

"Hey, handsome," breathed the soft, beautiful voice of the woman he loved, as she slipped her arms around his middle. "Where've you been? I missed you today." She placed a loving kiss on his neck.

Standing behind the bar, Roy braced himself on the crates of liquor, clenched his eyes shut, trying hard not to give into his natural reaction to lean into her touch. He took a long, deep breath. "Sorry. Didn't realise I needed to give you a play-by-play of where I've been."

Thankfully, his voice was uncharacteristically cold and hard and it caused her to flinch back as if she'd been burnt. Turning his face toward hers, Thea asked, "Whoa. Everything okay?"

Jerking out of her clutch, he gulped hard attempting to block out her intoxicating scent and sighed heavily. He hated himself for putting the look of confusion in her eyes, but in the long run maybe Oliver was right. As fucking gut-wrenchingly painful as it was to imagine a life without her, maybe being away from him was better. Now all he had to do was get his heart to agree with his mind.

Hefting the next crate on the bar with more force than necessary, he bit out an annoyed (or, what he hoped was annoyed) growl, "Everything's just peachy. Where do you want these?"

Thea's brows folded together at the noticeable amount of unusual hostility in his voice. "Jeez. Evasive much. What's going on? You're not usually like this with me..."

"I said, I was fine. Can't you just leave it alone?" he said, scowling.

Her perfectly shaped brows pinched together in bewilderment. "Uh, no, I can't. Not when it comes to the man I'm in love with," she shot back, anger hinting in her voice. "So, stop being such a dick and tell me what the hell happened today to make you so hostile with me."

Panic filled his body and his breath was lodged in his throat at the thought of what he was about to say. Trying his hardest to steel his expression, he turned toward her and forced a glare. "Jesus. Nothing happened, Thea. I just..." Roy averted his eyes, not knowing how to say these next words. A resigned expression haunted his features. Bringing his eyes back to hers, he finally said, "Thea, we need to break up."

Stunned, Thea blinked twice before shaking her head, "What? No."

"What?" A part of him was freaking ecstatic that she was fighting for them, but the other half just wanted her to give in because he knew the more she fought, the more he'd have to hurt her. "What do you mean, no? Thea, you can't make me date you."

"Roy, yesterday you gave me a bracelet worth every dime that you had, and now, what? You wanna end things?" Thea paused, pinning him with a confused gaze. "Look, you're obviously going through some stuff right now, and lashing out at me is the only way you can cope. But whatever it is, I'm not going to let you go through it alone. I love you, Roy, and I'm always gonna be here for you."

Swallowing past the tightness in his throat, he scoffed, "Did you ever think that maybe I don't want to be with you anymore?"

His heart squeezed uncomfortably in his chest at the look of sheer hurt on her face. But still, he kept digging the knife deeper. "It was fun while it lasted, but I guess I just realized that I'm not the kinda guy who does relationships."

Roy was going to hurl. Lying to her like this, hurting her feelings and breaking both of their hearts, felt like a salt-tipped blade slicing his heart. It fucking killed.

She shook her head in disbelief as a distraught tear rolled down her cheek. "No. I don't believe you! How can you stand here and say this to me?"

Seeing her cry had always torn at his heart, but being the reason for those tears? He'd never felt so low in all his life. And that was saying something, considering the life he led. "Pretty easy, actually. I just open my mouth and the words come out."

"B-But you told me you loved me..."

He shrugged nonchalantly, while inside he felt anything but. "How else was I meant to get between your legs? Christ, Thea, you have quite the spoiled little rich-bitch reputation. I knew I needed to up my game, and I knew you wouldn't screw me without some pansy-ass declaration of love. It worked. Although, I'm starting to wonder why I wasted my time. I didn't think you'd get so damn clingy, and, to be quite honest, you could use a few tips," he chuckled evilly. "No man likes a chick who squeals like a fucking pig when she cums."

Thea stood opposite him, completely flabbergasted. She couldn't believe this was the same man that made love to her that same morning. The man who had whispered in her ear how much he loved her while he climaxed. He'd always told her he loved it when she was loud. With her tears now falling hard and fast, she fell back onto the barstool and lowered her watery eyes to the floor. "I don't understand why you're doing this."

A cruel sneer painted his face. "Don't hate the player, baby. Hate the game."

Shaking her head in disbelief, she whispered, more to herself than him, "I really thought you were the one." And it was at that precise moment when her employee, and Roy's co-worker, Lindsey came into view.

Dread filled Roy's stomach at the sight of his colleague. Fuck. How much had she heard? He'd thought they were alone.

"Sorry to disturb you, but Tina just called in sick, so we're down one."

Not really knowing what to do, Thea simply nodded solemnly in response. Her heart was broken. The man she thought loved her had completely obliterated her mind, body, and soul, and he did it as if it was the most casual thing in the world. Unable to talk, she slowly stood from the stool and turned toward her office, causing Roy's heart to shatter further with each step she took away from him.

However, just before she took the steps toward her office, she turned around and looked at the man to whom she'd given her whole heart, "You know, even with everything you just said, I really do love you. I would've done anything for you. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy," she stopped to take a shaky breath. "Now, though? Now, I don't ever want to see you again. You don't deserve me. You took my heart and you trampled over it. You didn't care for my feelings, so I refuse to care about yours. I hate you, Roy Harper. I love you and I really fucking hate you."

With that, Thea turned her back on the man who ruined her life and walked away from him, never looking back.