You All Everybody

"No, really? You're kidding me, right?" I laugh, flopping down onto the sand. I grin, turning my head toward Charlie who has taken my lead and propped himself up on one elbow next to me on the beach. "An altar boy? You were an altar boy?"

"'Fraid so," Charlie says, grinning at my good mood. "I can sing Ave Maria with the best of them."

"So while I was being Miss Rebellious Let-Sneak-Out-Of-The-House-At-All-Hours, you were singing in a church choir?"

He nods. "Played organ too."

"A man of many talents," I joke, trying desperately to keep a straight face but losing in the end. Charlie can't help laughing either – I suppose it's infectious.

"Well, I find it hard to believe you were Goth as a teenager," he says. "Look at you now. All New Age and maternal. I suspected you always had your crystals and 'power symbols' and all that rot. Did you really sneak out your window at night?"

"Of course," I say. "To meet boys. Bad boys. Mum hated it."

"And what does your Mum think now?"

I sit up, looking off into the water so I don't have to tell him the truth. "She'd be proud I decided to keep Aaron. She'd love being a Grandmum."

"I hope she gets to meet him one day, then."

"Yeah, me too."

I lay back down next to him again, mimicking his turned-to-the-side-propped-elbow approach. "What do you plan to do once we get off the Island?"

Charlie shrugs which is really quite something considering how we're laying. "Mount a 'back from the dead' tour. Me brother Liam and I were talking about getting Driveshaft back together before the crash. He's married with a little baby in Sydney. That's why I was there. People love nostalgia now so my new manager thinks there'd be a market. Especially once I miraculously rise from the dead." He grins and I can tell how much the music means to him. "Do you have a life to go back to?"

I shake my head. "Not really."

"Maybe you can come with," Charlie suggests, the first time he has ever out-right talked about us being together after we're rescued. "You, me, Aaron, Liam, Karen, and Megan all in a big tour bus. Or two separate buses if you'd rather. Megan's three, going on four, she'd love a little baby around."

"Are you asking to prove to Liam you're a better man or because you really want us around?" I ask.

"I want you and Aaron around, of course," he says. "Why would I even bring it up if I didn't?"

"Do you love me or do you just want to take care of us?"

Charlie's happy expression crumbles and I inwardly hate myself for asking such questions and hurting him with words.

"Well, both I suppose," he finally answers. "When you love someone, aren't you supposed to take care of them? I want you and Aaron around. Both of you. I don't mind you're a package deal. I rather like it, actually."

"Probably one of the only guys in creation who wants a ready-made family," I say, sitting up, looking at the water so I don't have to look at him. Charlie sits up too, reaching for my hand and holding it tight in both of his. The frayed paper where he's written 'F A T E ' tickles my fingers.

"I'll marry you if you want," he offers. "If you're worried about someone leaving you and Aaron again, I mean. I won't be like him. The guy before. Aaron's dad. I won't leave you, Claire."

"People have said that before and they always do."

"Not me," Charlie insists. "I've never said it before, Claire, and I intend to keep the promise if you let me. I won't leave you. You just gotta tell me that you want that."

I should say yes. I really should. It's not every day a girl gets a marriage proposal and an offer to start a new life with a member of a rock band. I should say yes.

But I can't.

"I need time to think on it, Charlie," I say. I turn, cupping the side of his face with my free hand, before leaning in to kiss him. "Thank you. I really will think on it."

"Promise?" he asks.

I nod, brushing his shaggy blond hair out of his eyes. "Promise."

He leans in to kiss me, longer this time, and I really wish I could be happy. I really do.

But I can't.