AN- Hmmm....Okay, this was meant to start out as a WWF Fear Factor with the
stars I chose but....well, it went weird after I killed the Guy. (You're
saying 'what Guy?' You'll find out) The idea for this came when I saw Steve
Baldwin dissin' everyone on the celebrity Fear Factor. I was thinking about
DDP at the time and his 'Breathe in, Breathe out, Think Positive' lessons
to Christian. (They both are in the fic. And, It's not a bad thing, It's a
GOOD thing! ....... Sorry, couldn't resist) I was going 'If he told
everyone to think positive and inhale, and Goldust was in the cast, they'd
probably duke it out. There will be lots of HHH bashing whenever I can fit
it in. I just don't like the FountainBoy. I'll post a little bit,and if
you like my oddness and weirdness, lemme know. My funny scenes series shows
off my oddness quite well, or so I am told. *sees that everyone has already
skippped ahead to the fic....* Ahem. *shrugs...might as well* SCOTT HALL IS
A HOTTIE!!!! *blushes as everyone looks at her* Ummm.......Oh yeah! This is
my first WWF fic. Pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssseeeee R/R!!!! *big smile* : D
Disclaimer- I hate these dumb things. But, anyway.....I don't own any of these people I mention. Just like to play around with odd little ideas that pop up. Now that half my audience is asleep, onto the fic....
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*Guy from Fear Favtor walks up and looks to the audience with that 'I've been smellin' what the Rock is cookin' toooooo much' look. He has an odd habit of not....blinking...at.....all. He begins his boring...uh, *exciting* intro. Author forgets his name, so, Author just calls him Guy*
GUY- These are very dangerous. They are also very hazardous to one's health and mental stability. They should be attempted at home.
AUTHOR- Uh..... o_O
GUY- *blinks for the first time in the last 10 minutes.* Oh. Yeah. They SHOULDN'T NOT be attempted at home. *shakes his head in confusion* Damn you, Triple H! *apologizes to the audience* I asked him to write out the cue cards, and well....you know him. He likes to spit water everywhere and be wet.....*smiles* And, that's NOT a bad thing....
(VOICE FROM BACKSTAGE) You steal my line and I'll "positively" kick your ass. And THAT is a good thing....for me anyway.
GUY- Ummmm..... *clears throat nervously* These stunts are performed by....
AUTHOR YAWNS
GUY- Hey, it's my job! Gimme a break!
(BACKSTAGE: Chuck and Billy sing the kit-kat bar song with great enthusiasm. Everyone just slowly, cautiously, backs away from the "partners". They don't want to catch whatever weird mental disease Chuck and Billy have)
AUTHOR- Not anymore, uh...., whatever-your-name is! *deletes him from the fic* o_O SHIT!! Now, my fic is without a host....
UNDERTAKER- Are you disrespecting me?!?!?!?!?! I'm the Dead Man Walking!! I want, no, I DESERVE to be the host, you stupid bitc-----
AUTHOR- *readies the delete button* You wanna finish that sentance, Dead Man?
UNDERTAKER- Uh..............no.
AUTHOR- Thought so. Now then...... *Brings in one of her fave hotties: Beni Gabor from The Mummy. Beni smiles, thinking about how rich he's going to be. Turns around and slams right into Kane's chest. Beni glances up, sees Kane, and runs from the fic.* Damn it all to....
KANE- HELL!!! HELLFIRE!!!!! *does his intro...you know the one. Flames shoot up from all corners of the ring*
TRIPLE H- *screams like a girl and runs to the ring, quickly throwing water on his head. Runs to one corner, and does the spit-up thing he likes to do. Extinguishes all the flames. Smiles proudly*
AUTHOR- *smiles innocently as KANE walks to the back room. As soon as he is gone, I bring the flames back up....just to watch TRIPLE H be his usual moronic self again. Gets bored of that and sends him back to the locker room or whatever it's called* Okay, well, I guess I'm the host of this mostly plotless plot.
Y2J- *comes to the ring, carrying the belts....as usual* I'M THE BEST!!! ME!!! I DEMAND TO BE THE HOST!!! MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!!!!!
*Suddenly, the nWo come out. Y2J looks at them, confused.*
Y2J- *angry* YOU DARE INTERRUPT THE LIVING LEGEND'S SPEECH? *pauses. Pulls out a huge Dictionary and looks up all the words he just said, except for 'Living Legend'. He overloaded his mental capacity again.......*
KEVIN NASH- We are......*confused. Looks at the script and turns to Hogan* Uh......why'd we come out?
HULK HOGAN- *Looks at the script as well* I have no idea......Wait. *they both look at SCOTT HALL, who is fixing his ever-geled hair, making sure the bang is just right. HULK HOGAN looks back at KEVIN* Do you need to ask, brother?
KEVIN NASH- Yeah, as a matter a fact I.....*looks at SCOTT HALL, then at the AUTHOR* Nope, never mind.....
SCOTT HALL- What? The AUTHOR wanted us to come out. So, we did. It's not because she likes me or anything.....................*blows a kiss to the AUTHOR*
AUTHOR- *catches the kiss and blows him one right back*
KEVIN NASH, HULK HOGAN- Oh, good grief........*they roll their eyes and leave. After a moment, SCOTT HALL realizes they left and follows them out*
AUTHOR- *blushes* Ahem. Anyway..........Uh...what were we doing again?
Y2J- We were discussing on promoting me to HOST.......
AUTHOR- No, Jericho. I have someting more important planned for you...
Y2J- *After looking up the word 'important', he turns to the AUTHOR* Reeeeeeeaaaaaalllllly?
AUTHOR- Really, really. You're in our first match.
Y2J- WWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOHHHHHOOOOOO!! It's about time I got the respect I deserve!
UNDERTAKER- *whispers to the AUTHOR*
AUTHOR- Nope. You won't be fighting him. It's not that kind of a match.......*thinks*......Although, if you wanted to interrupt the next match, be my guest. But, if you interrupt, that means you have to participate...
UNDERTAKER- *gets nervous and remains quiet*
*CHRISTIAN'S intro plays as he makes his way to the ring. A PENCIL comes into the picture and deletes the belts from Y2J's shoulders*
Y2J- Hey!! I'm the Living Legend! THE UNDISPUTED CHAMPION, you ass clown......!!
*PENCIL hovers dangerously close to Y2J's mouth*
AUTHOR- You want to repeat that, sucka?
Y2J- *nervously* Um....no, not at all.......
BOOKER T- *thinks about complaining about the use of his phrase. Thinks about GUY who got deleted so quickly and decides against it. Realizes he had 2 full, complete thoughts. Does the SPIN-A-ROONI in excitement.
Y2J- Um...........This is nothing like Fear Factor.......
AUTHOR- You'd rather eat bull's testicles and be covered in bugs instead of this match? That can be arranged......
Y2J- *quickly changing the subject* So, uh, what kind of match is this, anyhow?
*CHRISTIAN steps into the ring and looks around, noting the abscence of a ref.*
AUTHOR- Well, Mr. Legend, what do you think this match is?
Y2J- *thinks about this*
..............five minutes later
Y2J- AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! MY HEAD HURTS!!! I THOUGHT TOO MUCH!!!!!!
AUTHOR, DDP, nWo, CHRISTIAN, UNDERTAKER, KANE, HHH, CHUCK & BILLY, anyone else I will add- o_O
AUTHOR- Well, Genius, it's a.........TANTRUM MATCH!!!! Whoever throws the best tantrum, wins. *turns to UNDERTAKER* Will you be interrupting......?
UNDERTAKER- *quickly shakes his head no*
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AUTHOR- Well, do you want me to continue? If you'd like to see any certain WWF Superstars in any certain odd match, lemme know via e-mails. You could post it in a review, but either way, I'll take your suggestion into consideration. Don't bring up any stars from the 80's or 90's that aren't around now.....I only started watching WWF in November of 2001. Well, anyway, r/r!!!
Disclaimer- I hate these dumb things. But, anyway.....I don't own any of these people I mention. Just like to play around with odd little ideas that pop up. Now that half my audience is asleep, onto the fic....
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*Guy from Fear Favtor walks up and looks to the audience with that 'I've been smellin' what the Rock is cookin' toooooo much' look. He has an odd habit of not....blinking...at.....all. He begins his boring...uh, *exciting* intro. Author forgets his name, so, Author just calls him Guy*
GUY- These are very dangerous. They are also very hazardous to one's health and mental stability. They should be attempted at home.
AUTHOR- Uh..... o_O
GUY- *blinks for the first time in the last 10 minutes.* Oh. Yeah. They SHOULDN'T NOT be attempted at home. *shakes his head in confusion* Damn you, Triple H! *apologizes to the audience* I asked him to write out the cue cards, and well....you know him. He likes to spit water everywhere and be wet.....*smiles* And, that's NOT a bad thing....
(VOICE FROM BACKSTAGE) You steal my line and I'll "positively" kick your ass. And THAT is a good thing....for me anyway.
GUY- Ummmm..... *clears throat nervously* These stunts are performed by....
AUTHOR YAWNS
GUY- Hey, it's my job! Gimme a break!
(BACKSTAGE: Chuck and Billy sing the kit-kat bar song with great enthusiasm. Everyone just slowly, cautiously, backs away from the "partners". They don't want to catch whatever weird mental disease Chuck and Billy have)
AUTHOR- Not anymore, uh...., whatever-your-name is! *deletes him from the fic* o_O SHIT!! Now, my fic is without a host....
UNDERTAKER- Are you disrespecting me?!?!?!?!?! I'm the Dead Man Walking!! I want, no, I DESERVE to be the host, you stupid bitc-----
AUTHOR- *readies the delete button* You wanna finish that sentance, Dead Man?
UNDERTAKER- Uh..............no.
AUTHOR- Thought so. Now then...... *Brings in one of her fave hotties: Beni Gabor from The Mummy. Beni smiles, thinking about how rich he's going to be. Turns around and slams right into Kane's chest. Beni glances up, sees Kane, and runs from the fic.* Damn it all to....
KANE- HELL!!! HELLFIRE!!!!! *does his intro...you know the one. Flames shoot up from all corners of the ring*
TRIPLE H- *screams like a girl and runs to the ring, quickly throwing water on his head. Runs to one corner, and does the spit-up thing he likes to do. Extinguishes all the flames. Smiles proudly*
AUTHOR- *smiles innocently as KANE walks to the back room. As soon as he is gone, I bring the flames back up....just to watch TRIPLE H be his usual moronic self again. Gets bored of that and sends him back to the locker room or whatever it's called* Okay, well, I guess I'm the host of this mostly plotless plot.
Y2J- *comes to the ring, carrying the belts....as usual* I'M THE BEST!!! ME!!! I DEMAND TO BE THE HOST!!! MEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!!!!!
*Suddenly, the nWo come out. Y2J looks at them, confused.*
Y2J- *angry* YOU DARE INTERRUPT THE LIVING LEGEND'S SPEECH? *pauses. Pulls out a huge Dictionary and looks up all the words he just said, except for 'Living Legend'. He overloaded his mental capacity again.......*
KEVIN NASH- We are......*confused. Looks at the script and turns to Hogan* Uh......why'd we come out?
HULK HOGAN- *Looks at the script as well* I have no idea......Wait. *they both look at SCOTT HALL, who is fixing his ever-geled hair, making sure the bang is just right. HULK HOGAN looks back at KEVIN* Do you need to ask, brother?
KEVIN NASH- Yeah, as a matter a fact I.....*looks at SCOTT HALL, then at the AUTHOR* Nope, never mind.....
SCOTT HALL- What? The AUTHOR wanted us to come out. So, we did. It's not because she likes me or anything.....................*blows a kiss to the AUTHOR*
AUTHOR- *catches the kiss and blows him one right back*
KEVIN NASH, HULK HOGAN- Oh, good grief........*they roll their eyes and leave. After a moment, SCOTT HALL realizes they left and follows them out*
AUTHOR- *blushes* Ahem. Anyway..........Uh...what were we doing again?
Y2J- We were discussing on promoting me to HOST.......
AUTHOR- No, Jericho. I have someting more important planned for you...
Y2J- *After looking up the word 'important', he turns to the AUTHOR* Reeeeeeeaaaaaalllllly?
AUTHOR- Really, really. You're in our first match.
Y2J- WWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOHHHHHOOOOOO!! It's about time I got the respect I deserve!
UNDERTAKER- *whispers to the AUTHOR*
AUTHOR- Nope. You won't be fighting him. It's not that kind of a match.......*thinks*......Although, if you wanted to interrupt the next match, be my guest. But, if you interrupt, that means you have to participate...
UNDERTAKER- *gets nervous and remains quiet*
*CHRISTIAN'S intro plays as he makes his way to the ring. A PENCIL comes into the picture and deletes the belts from Y2J's shoulders*
Y2J- Hey!! I'm the Living Legend! THE UNDISPUTED CHAMPION, you ass clown......!!
*PENCIL hovers dangerously close to Y2J's mouth*
AUTHOR- You want to repeat that, sucka?
Y2J- *nervously* Um....no, not at all.......
BOOKER T- *thinks about complaining about the use of his phrase. Thinks about GUY who got deleted so quickly and decides against it. Realizes he had 2 full, complete thoughts. Does the SPIN-A-ROONI in excitement.
Y2J- Um...........This is nothing like Fear Factor.......
AUTHOR- You'd rather eat bull's testicles and be covered in bugs instead of this match? That can be arranged......
Y2J- *quickly changing the subject* So, uh, what kind of match is this, anyhow?
*CHRISTIAN steps into the ring and looks around, noting the abscence of a ref.*
AUTHOR- Well, Mr. Legend, what do you think this match is?
Y2J- *thinks about this*
..............five minutes later
Y2J- AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! MY HEAD HURTS!!! I THOUGHT TOO MUCH!!!!!!
AUTHOR, DDP, nWo, CHRISTIAN, UNDERTAKER, KANE, HHH, CHUCK & BILLY, anyone else I will add- o_O
AUTHOR- Well, Genius, it's a.........TANTRUM MATCH!!!! Whoever throws the best tantrum, wins. *turns to UNDERTAKER* Will you be interrupting......?
UNDERTAKER- *quickly shakes his head no*
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AUTHOR- Well, do you want me to continue? If you'd like to see any certain WWF Superstars in any certain odd match, lemme know via e-mails. You could post it in a review, but either way, I'll take your suggestion into consideration. Don't bring up any stars from the 80's or 90's that aren't around now.....I only started watching WWF in November of 2001. Well, anyway, r/r!!!