I do not own tales of Symphonia
It has been a while since I have published, so I hope you enjoy it. :)
The night was his.
It was silent. Streams of light that flickered from the flames of their dying fire licked and kissed the sand, making it glow a warm gold and orange. Small specks of spectacular light glittered of the small grains. Beyond, the rest of the world was dark; the moon caressed the sand, creating rolling hills of silver. Cactus and rocks jutted in the distance, forming shadowy watches for the lonely desert; vigils of the silent plains of glowing granules. The world seemed so still, so quiet. Above, the stars beckoned to Kratos, blinking and winking, shining with their glimmering light. But Kratos did not look; no tonight, tonight the stars only brought him pain.
The others had fallen asleep hours ago. The half-elf boy was curled up on his sister's lap as she leaned heavily against the large stone that protruded out of the sand; it seemed a dark sentinel, another watch with Kratos. He wondered how long the two half-elves would be able to keep the secret of their race. Their breathing was soft and light. The teacher's hand was softly placed in the silver hair of the young child; his face was covered by both of his hands as he murmured softly in his sleep. Their two shadows mingled and stretched across the glowing sand warmed by the fire. It reminded him of a scene long ago; another display of sibling affection. He turned his head away from them; it was not a memory he wanted to think about. Not now. He sighed, his eyes shifting their gaze towards the young blond woman on the other side of the camp.
She was perfectly still. The flames ran their glowing fingers through her long blonde hair, making a small red reflection shine in her light locks. Both of her hands were placed complacently over her chest; there was a smile on her lips. A pleasant dream perhaps. Kratos swallowed. He hoped it was a pleasant dream – she needed as many as possible before she….
Kratos looked away, finally giving into his usual habit of staring at the stars above. He stared a moment before his eyes began to close slowly, a memory descending on him.
"Dada!" a small hand smacked Kratos' face. Something sticky remained on the little chubby hand and Kratos grimaced at the slimy feeling, though he didn't quite mind; the ubiquitous stickiness on the boy's fingers was something he was becoming accustomed to. The little boy began to bounce excitedly on his father's shoulders.
The little voice continued, "Staws!"
Kratos smiled. Lifting up both of his hands to remove the small body from off of his shoulders. The toddler whooped in glee as Kratos held him on in the air.
"Up!" Lloyd demanded.
Kratos obliged, and tossed Lloyd lightly into the air. He caught him then set him down in the silvery sand. Lloyd's hands slid down until they rested lightly upon his father's two strong hands.
"Bwig." He told his father. He looked up at him; his two large brown eyes caught the moon and shone with childlike innocence. He smiled a toothless grin at his father. Kratos crouched down so he was level with his small son. Lloyd lifted his arm, smacking his small little hand heavily into his chest. He puffed out his chest as far as he could.
"Llowyd is stwong, like dada."
Kratos smiled and nodded, "Yes, you are."
Lloyd flexed, "I wanna gwow swonger!"
Kratos smiled again, this time broader, "That's good, Lloyd."
Lloyd shoved his small chubby finger into his father's chest.
"You two, dada, you gwow strong."
Kratos reached for his son, lifting him into his arms and snuggling him close.
"Yes, Lloyd." Kratos muttered, "Let's grow strong together."
Kratos sighed as he withdrew his gaze from the sky. So long ago, yet, the memory was so fresh in his mind. He glanced towards the matt where he knew the brown haired boy lay sleeping. There was just one problem, the boy wasn't sleeping, and he wasn't there. Kratos stood, abruptly, his eyes skimming the camp for the lost lad. Noishe grumbled and began to stretch as his companion stood in the sand. He blinked sleepily at him.
"Where'd he go, Noishe?" Kratos asked him silently.
Noishe yawned and laid back down in the sand, making it clear that we was not going to help Kratos look for the boy in red. Kratos sighed giving the protozone a reproachful look.
"With you looking after him all these years no wonder he turned out the way he did…" he muttered under his breath before turning and walking away in the soft sand.
The noise of his walking was soft and light. It was hushed, the sand shifting slowly underneath his boots. It was a simple sound, however, if Kratos listened closely enough, he could hear each individual grain as it grated against each other. But he was not paying attention to the sand is it sifted beneath him, his was listening for another sound: a sigh, a whisper, a heartbeat… anything.
He was looking for something else – he was looking for Lloyd.
He soon found him. Lloyd was sitting on a large boulder looking off into the immense silver sea of sand before him. The luminous lunar light of the night embraced him, and he seemed to glow with a heavenly light. Kratos approached him, as he did, Lloyd turned to glance behind him.
The young man seemed confused at first, then peeved, then, strangely, slightly pleased.
"Oh, it's you." He stated simply.
Kratos did not respond but continued to walk up to the boy. Lloyd had turned his face away from him and continued to look up at the stars in the heavens above.
"It's a beautiful night." Lloyd remarked casually, "The stars look different here than in Iselia."
Kratos peered at Lloyd from the side of his eyes. He kept his arms folded; the boy did not feel Kratos' eyes upon him. Kratos withdrew his gaze and looked at the stars above.
They were beautiful. They shimmered and glittered, teasing the moon with their envious light. The stars gathered in coruscating clusters, cuddling and quietly kissing each other as they blinked and nodded in the cool night sky. Their seemed to be streams of them that flowed through the sky, the light they gave off looked almost as if they were melting.
"You shouldn't be up." Kratos stated stoically, "Tomorrow will be arduous. And you must be fatigued from the fight with Botta."
Lloyd shrugged, "I couldn't sleep. I'll sleep once I am tired."
Kratos opened his mouth to once again encourage sleep, but Lloyd turned to him again, he looked at Kratos up and down. Kratos couldn't tell if he was annoyed or amused.
"It's weird with you just standing there like that. Want to sit?" Lloyd asked.
Kratos felt an odd sensation deep within his chest; his heart stirred – something that, until recently, had not happened for many, many years. His heart had continually ached for almost fourteen years, but it did not move. It was stone, stone that was continually being beaten by a wave of emotion; but it remained flinty and solid and cold. But now, now his stone heart began to tremble every time he looked at the boy and saw Anna within him. They had the same smile, the same colored hair, the same wide-eyed naivety that was known as hope. He was definitely Anna's son.
He remained silent as he sat next to the boy.
"Kratos," Lloyd stated, the boy looked down her brow furrowed suddenly. The next words came out slowly, as if they were hard to say, "Thank you… thanks for today."
Kratos nodded.
Lloyd let out a sight, "As much as I hate to admit it, seeing you fight, it made me realize… I have a lot more to learn before I become strong. Strong like you."
Kratos looked up at the stars. Strong? Could Kratos really claim that he was strong? Hadn't he succumbed once again to the will of Mithos? Hadn't he abandoned his goals once Anna was lost? Wasn't he still now, deceiving his own son? Kratos sighed.
"Strength is more than just physical," Kratos replied.
Lloyd looked at him curiously, "How so?"
Kratos glanced at the brunette boy before continuing, "There is strength of the heart. That strength is what motivates you to grow strong physically as well."
"What was your motivation to grow strong?" Lloyd asked.
Kratos found himself speaking before he could stop, "The idea of peace; the feeling of debt; the desire to protect my family…. But it's gone now."
His voice trailed. Damn. He had said too much. But it was true: first, he fought for peace, to unite Tethe'alla and Sylverant; then he fought for Mithos out of retribution for being unable to protect Martel; and then he fought for Anna and Lloyd, so they could live… once he failed in that, well, he lost his motivation. He had lost his inner strength; he had become stagnant.
Lloyd seemed to dwell only on the last reason, "Whoa!" he stated alarmed, "You had a family?"
There was now getting out of it now, Kratos sighed and lifted his hand, annoyed, to his head.
"Yes. Once."
"What happened to them?" Lloyd asked. His voice was sincere, but still laced with curiosity.
Kratos looked at the stars once more.
"They're dead." He stated bluntly, "Killed by…" he didn't want to lie, so he stretched the truth, "Desians."
Lloyd turned and glared at the sand below, "Desians." He tightened his fist into a tense ball, "Damn!" he pounded his fist into the rock he was sitting on, raising his voice as he did, "Why do they do such terrible things to humans!"
Kratos remained silent. He stared at the boys balled up fist and watched as it relaxed and melted, his hand opening to softly lie on the cold stone.
My mother too…" He stated, "was killed by Desians… but you already knew that."
There was a silence that descended upon the two men. The wind picked up, blowing the sand in
soft silver smoky strands that glided across the plains.
"That is why…" Lloyd started again, "That is why I want to become stronger. I don't want anyone else to end up like my mother or the people of Iselia. I don't want people to suffer. That's why, I have to get stronger. I want to protect them… those people, especially…" Lloyd turned and looked to where the fire was glowing in the distance of their small camp… his voice trailed. Kratos waited for him to finish, but he did not.
"I lost my motivation to fight when my family died." Kratos explained, "I fought for nothing; everything became empty. I have yet to truly grown since that moment."
Lloyd looked up at him curiously, "You aren't getting stronger?"
Kratos shook his head, his eyes closed. He then turned and looked at Lloyd.
"But you, Lloyd, You will grow stronger. You have a motivation; you have the desire to protect."
Lloyd looked down, tightening his hand once more into a fist.
"Yeah," he declared, "I will get stronger. I am going to find what my inner strength is and grow."
Kratos smiled, though Lloyd did not see as it was obscured by his hair and the shadow strewn over his face.
Lloyd looked up at him beaming.
"You, too, Kratos. You find a new motivation. That way you'll get stronger too."
Kratos was slightly taken aback, but his face remained flinty as the young man beamed at him.
"If you don't, well, then I will get stronger than you." Lloyd lifted his hand casually behind his head, scratching is slightly as he did, letting out a small laugh, "And that would just be weird.
Kratos smiled again, this time Lloyd was able to see a slight glimmer of it.
"All right," Kratos concurred, "Let's grow stronger together."
Lloyd smiled and turned his gaze back to the stars. Kratos followed his example. They remained silent, each lost in the glow of the stars. Kratos, once again, slid a side-glance at the boy next to him. Lloyd, simple Lloyd, completely unaware that years ago, they had this exact conversation – just with less words.
Grow strong, Lloyd. Kratos thought as he turned his gaze once again to the stars. His thought continued, I will attempt to grow as strong as you.
The stars continued to glitter throughout the night, the only witness to the promise reaffirmed.