I, Emiya Shirou, am currently facing a very dire situation.
This situation is something that could put the Holy Grail War to shame, in terms of cruelty, confusion and desperation.
This situation, if not handled properly, could potentially be more deadly than facing a horde of vampires at once while taking out several demons hell-bent on spreading the plague at the same time.
This situation, if not analyzed properly, could turn me into a "Sealing Designate" and put me on the war path with the Association, thus likely to make me a fugitive for the rest of my life.
This situation is, in my opinion, as disturbing as finding out the abuse Sakura experienced from her family, more dangerous than having Berserker coming after me, more shocking than finding out about Kotomine Kirei being the instigator of the Fuyuki Fire, and perhaps as unsettling as finding out that Archer was my possible future self!
So what is this situation that would make me feel I would rather do the Holy Grail War all over again?
"So Shirou, care to explain?" Those words cut through my heart with dread as I turned to the person who said it.
I am currently standing in the courtyard situated close to the Clock Tower of London. It is a pretty big courtyard which the students, the faculty and occasional visitors used to hang out or to travel to each other's dormitories or other buildings of the Mage's Association. It is also a way for the mages to travel to the typical streets of London for a dose of normality via several pathways nearby. Needless to say, this place gets a lot of traffic in the day time.
Which is why there are some people standing around seeing me backed into the wall of the closest building around like a cornered animal, while being faced with an opposition like none other.
In front of me, with her raven hair down, dressed in her casual red dress, black jacket and wearing the smile that is making me sweat in my boots, is the heir of the Tohsaka Clan, Rin. She was standing casually with her hands on her hips, but the pressure being exuded from her coupled with her patented "Tohsaka Smile Number 1" pretty much sets off every alarm in my body, telling me to get away from her. Fast.
On her right, dressed simply in her white shirt and blue blouse, with her blond hair tied up in a bun, is the heroic spirit in human form, Saber. Her stance is simple, with her hands clasped gently in front while she stood still, but the frown that is on her face and the glint in her emerald eyes is the proof that she is not amused at the situation.
On Rin's left, a lady whom you could not help but notice due to her extravagant clothing and personality, the woman who has gained many nicknames in her life: "The White Swan", "The Hunting Dog of the Ring" and "Forklift Lady"; She is Luviagelita Edelfelt or Luvia, as she insisted her friends to call her. She has one hand on her hip and the other cradling her golden drill curls lightly, her smile almost rivaling Rin's in intensity.
Then, located a little on my left side, dressed in a simple white dress and a light pink jacket, with her purple hair trailing behind her and her eyes looking at me almost tearfully as she clasped her hand in front of her, is my long-time friend Sakura Matou, who apparently came to visit me.
Next to her, with her trademark jacket and jeans that complement her tomboyish looks while still maintaining a feminine touch with her now longer brown hair, stood Ayako Mitsuzuri, her raised eyebrow and smirk showing that she is loving the absolute discomfort I am experiencing.
A little behind them, are three girls who I became acquainted with during my time in London. The first one is the spitfire redhead, Arianna Thomson, a specialist in the Fire Thaumaturgy from Scotland, dressed in her signature red dress with frills and knee high black boots, and her famous frown that speaks volumes of the situation.
The second one is the quiet librarian girl who has an affinity with the Wind Thaumaturgy. A fellow Japanese that barely reached my chest in height, with her black hair tied in a small bun, dressed in a simple white shirt and black blouse, with tears threatening to flow out behind her spectacles, is Nagisa Yumi.
The last one is my classmate who has a rare affinity with 'Nature'. With her blond hair trailing to her hips and in her light green clothes that complement her pale complexion, is Anita Fenson, who is currently giving a cute, but very angry pout at me.
Oh but that's not the crazy part. I mean, having these women around me is bad enough, but it's still not crazy yet.
Why, you might ask?
Because on my right side are the two most unlikely people to appear at all in public, much less in the same place at the same time. The first one, dressed in her white clothes, black pants and brown boots, with her light brown hair tied up in a ponytail and a right glove, is Barthomeloi Lorelei, otherwise known by everyone as "The Queen of the Clock Tower". Currently she is looking at me with a frown and a rather visible tick mark on her head, her left hand grasping her patented weapon tightly to the point one could hear the handle straining from the exertion.
The second woman, standing next to her, is perhaps even more outrageous to be around. Dressed in her trademark white shirt, blue jeans and brown shoes, with a brown jacket to handle the cold and her red hair trailing in the wind, stood the user of the Fifth Magic, Aoko Aozaki aka the "Blue", with a teasing smile that seemed to agree with Ayako in terms of seeing my discomfort.
I gulped a little harder than normal as I stand before this selection of girls, feeling like I'm in front of a shooting squad after being sentenced at a trial.
A shooting squad made of Gandr, Excalibur, Fire, Explosions and other painful attacks, that is.
What is with this line-up of girls all of a sudden?! What did I do to deserve this, and why the hell does this situation seemed to resemble something straight out of an eroge game Lord El-Melloi II plays during his spare time to study Japan's culture?!
Wait a Damn Root Minute! When I think about it, there are a few people in the world who would not mind seeing me in such a situation. Considering one is stuck in Fuyuki, the second is dead during the Grail war, and the third is currently in the afterlife, waiting to be incarnated again in order to kill me, there can be only one person left. And considering the location we are at, that had to be the guy!
And I was right; situated in the building a little far back behind Lorelei and Aoko, at the window located at the third floor, I could spot with my Reinforced eyes, the figure of a certain old man who was not bothering to cover the smug look on his face as he enjoys the situation I am in. He was lightly clutching his side as he laughed uncontrollably at the expression on my face.
Faced with such overwhelming odds and the prospect of long suffering from that old man, under the watchful eyes of the passer-by and for some odd reason, looks of jealousy from some of the male students, there was only one thing I could say. That much I decided as I throw back my head after taking a deep breath and let out my frustration with these words.
"DAMN YOU ZEL-REEEEETTTTCCCCCCCHHHHH!"
"""SHIROU EMIYA!"""
Damn it, how in Root's Name did I get into this damn situation?!