Chapter One: Anything You Can Do
7:20pm
"Man, that didn't go as smoothly as I was expecting," Dean Winchester flopped onto the washed-out green duvet covering the uncomfortable motel bed. A large purple bruise was starting to form about his right eye and his muscles ached to high heaven.
"I didn't think it went too bad," his brother, Sam, sat down at the wobbly table, "I mean, you messed up that binding spell but everything turned out okay."
Dean leaned up on his elbows and looked at his brother through tired eyes, "I'd like to see you do better, Sammy!"
Sam sighed, "I'm just saying, you didn't do it perfectly, that's all!" He rubbed his forehead, trying to keep a long overdue headache at bay, "Everyone makes mistakes."
"They do?" The trench coat-wearing angel who had been standing in the corner of the room silently finally spoke up. He cocked his head to one side and wore his usual, confused expression, "I don't believe that to be a true fact. If by 'everyone' you mean, well, everyone then-"
"You've never made a mistake?" Sam snorted and looked to his brother who simply rolled his eyes; he was used to Castiel's odd ways by now.
"I don't-" before Castiel could finish he collapsed to the floor in a pile of coat and tie. Sam got to his feet to see to the angel but he too passed out. Dean sat upright, utterly confused, and felt a wave of fatigue grip him solidly,
"Son of a-", he too was out cold.
4:32am
"Ohh, my head," Dean rubbed his face and slowly opened his eyes; he was sprawled on the floor and his skull felt like someone had used his head as a baseball. His eyes drifted across the room to where his little – 'little' being a word rarely used to describe Sam – brother lay. Dean scrambled on all fours towards him and started to shake him,
"Sam? Sammy, wake up!"
Nothing. Dean ran a hand through his own, strangely product-free hair and got shakily to his feet. That's when he saw it; his body was lying on the bed unconscious. Was he having another out of body experience? Because that would be so inconvenient.
"Ah, crap."
Suddenly something extremely unexpected happened; his body opened it's eyes and looked at him, straight in the eye. Dean wasn't going to wait around to see what beasty had decided to inhabit his handsome self and so he dived for it, landing on top of it like a trained hooker.
"Cass?!" Whatever was in Dean's body squeaked in surprise, "What the hell are you doing?!"
Dean stopped abruptly and stared, bewildered, into his own eyes,
"'Cass?' What the hell are you talking about?" he raised his fist, ready to punch, "What are you? How do you look like me? Shifter? Demon?"
"What? I don't know what you-" the Dean on the bed stopped; he had moved one hand behind his head and was pulling on the ends of his hair. He continued down his neck as though searching for something, "Did someone cut my hair?!"
"What?" Dean tightened his fist, "You mean my hair!"
"Wait a minute," Dean #2 pushed the real Dean off the bed and squinted at him, analysing with his eyes, "Dean? Is that you?"
"Look you son of a bitch, I don't know what you are but you had better stop looking like me right now or I will-"
"Whoa, wait, Dean! It's me, Sam!" The thing wearing Dean's body held up his hands in defence, a pleading look on his face.
Dean narrowed his eyes; it was uncanny how his own body seemed to be moving like his brother usually did. Right down to the pitiful crease between the eyebrows. He poked the face in front of him and breathed,
"Sam? Why do you look like me?"
Sam, in Dean's body, shrugged and gestured to his brother, "You don't exactly look yourself."
The eldest Winchester's mouth gaped open and he made a b-line for the bathroom; he looked into the cracked mirror mounted on the wall and his hands started to poke and prod at the face he was now wearing,
"Oh hell no! Why do I have to be the freakin' bird man?!" Dean analysed Castiel's features carefully and, as he was about to inspect the angel's ground floor, heard a groan come from the other room.
When he returned to the main room, Sam in Dean's body, was crouching beside his own lanky body as it began to stir. Cass opened his eyes and blinked into what he thought were Dean's, which were a little closer than he would have liked.
"Does my nose really look like that?" Sam reached for his own nose but Castiel sat up and pulled away from him. He looked over to where Dean was standing and bolted to his feet, knocking into the table in the process.
Once he'd regained his composure he pointed to Dean, who he assumed was some sort of shape-shifter, and spoke in the same hushed tones as he usually did, except this time it was Sam's voice that came out,
"What creature are you?"
Dean rolled Castiel's eyes and Sam spoke, cringing a little as his brother's deep tones emerged from his mouth,
"Cass, he's not a 'creature', its Dean."
Cass turned to look at who he thought was Dean, finding it odd that he had to look down on him,
"I don't understand. Who does that make you?"
Sam slumped in Dean's smaller body and sighed, "Sam. I'm Sam."
Dean stepped towards the now extremely tall angel, Cass' coat swishing behind him, "Its true, Cass. He's Sam, I'm Dean and we've all somehow been 'Skeleton Keyed'." Both Sam and Castiel looked quizzically at one another, a silent question hung in the air and Dean was forced to explain himself, "You know, like the film! With John Hurt and that blond chick!"
"I see," Castiel wore Sam's face in the angel's usual expression; eyebrows furrowed, eyes narrowed and held out his large hands, "I will see what I can do to resolve this. Give me your hands."
The brothers did as they were told and held out their hands above the angel's. After almost a minute of utter nothingness, Dean became restless and cleared his throat purposefully,
"Not to rush you or anything, Cass, but is something supposed to be happening?"
Castiel opened Sam's eyes and frowned, deeper than usual, "I do not understand."
Dean chuckled, a sound which was quite odd in the angel's voice, and won himself an accusing look from his brother, "What? It's funny hearing that in your voice, Sam! He's like Robo-Sam!"
Sam's lips twitched up at one side and he turned back to look at Cass, not used to having to look up to see into someone's eyes, "So what's the deal, Cass, can you fix us?"
"No."
"'No'?" Dean tried to look big as he scowled up at Cass in Sam's body but he'd lost even more inches on his brother now that he was in the angel's body, "Can't you just 'zap' us back to normal?"
"Even if I had my powers, I-"
"Wait a second, you don't have them?!" Sam gaped.
"Perfect!" Dean sat down heavily on the bed, "So I'm stuck in Columbo's meat sack for the rest of my life!" He scratched absently at the stubble on his chin.
"When we switched I think that perhaps we swapped our abilities too," Castiel chose to ignore the reference that he once again did not get.
"So you're saying, because Dean is in your body, he's got your angel powers?" Sam looked horrified.
"I'm afraid so."
Dean looked up from where he sat, "Okay, great!" he got to his feet and raised his arms out, "Show me how to work this mojo!"
Castiel and Sam exchanged concerned glances.