So this is my first story on Fanfic. I hope you like it. The story takes place during Mockingjay after Katniss saw Peeta's reaction to Delly. Please tell me what you think.
Katniss POV
I wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. My blankets are strangling me because of my thrashing about that I do almost every night. I just had another horrible dream about being in the games again. As I lay there staring at the ceiling the first thing that comes to my mind is how Peeta used to hold me on the train at night and what a comfort that was to me. I set up and reach into the drawer that holds some of my memories. I search until I find the silver parachute that still holds the pearl that Peeta gave me on the beach in the Quarter Quell. As I lay back down I roll the pearl around in my fingers and on my cheek. What I would give to be back in that moment on the beach with Peeta. I finally decide that I want to see Peeta again. I know I can't get close and feel the warmth of his body next to mine; I am reminded of that by the pain I still feel in my neck from when Peeta tried to kill me. But I feel sure that if I can just be near him than that might be enough.
I quietly get up, slip across the room, and pull on some pants before I silently go out the door. I look up and down the eerily lit hallway. There must be safety lights that always remain on. Since I can neither see nor hear anyone, I quietly make my way down the hall. I stop at each intersection and look both directions and listen for voices. I occasionally pass someone in the hall but we just look at each other and continue on our separate ways. I am guessing they are people with late jobs that are just returning to their homes.
I reach the elevator and push the button. As I silently wait I listen for noises. Finally after what seems like an eternity the door slowly open and I step inside. I push the button for the hospital floor. I don't even have to think about it since I have been in there so many times as a patient or been there to visit both Prim and mom. They both work long hours at the hospital.
When the elevator reaches the hospital floor the doors slide open and I stand there not making a noise. I begin to second-guess my self. I have not seen Peeta since Delly went it to see him and he began screaming horrible things about me. I shutter as I step off the elevator. I stand still for a moment as I regain my composure. Nothing will happen I tell my self. I won't go in the room with Peeta just in the observation room where he will never know I am there.
I slip down the hall past the rooms of different patients. All I hear is the occasional groan or the movement of someone shifting positions in bed. Even those noises make me jump or freeze in mid step.
I finally come to the observation room and stand at the door for a while. What will I see when I go in. I know they have been trying some form of rehabilitation, but I don't know what that entails. I finally decide that not matter what Peeta looks like or how many wires he is hooked up to I have to see him. I put my hand on the knob thinking it may be locked but when I begin to move it turns easily and the door slowly begins to open. I open it just wide enough to peek inside and see that no one is inside.
I slip through the small opening and close the door behind me. I stand froze for a moment and just look around. There are computers and papers everywhere. Then I turn to window that looks into Peeta room. I cringe a little as the flood of all the horrible things he said about me returns to my memory. Could I really be that horrible, then I remind myself that it was the memories that the capital altered that made him think that way.
I step up to the glass window and look inside. All I see is an empty, white room with a bed in the middle where Peeta is strapped down. He is lying there so still that I almost wonder if he is still alive. As I watch him I see his chest slowly rise and fall as he breathes deeply. I just stand there watching almost wishing I could go in there and lay on the bed with him. He seems so calm and gentle that I could almost forget that he tried to kill me. As I watch I focus on his breathing. This relaxes me and almost makes me drift off to sleep.
I almost fall over, but I catch myself. I look around the room and see chairs pushed up against the back wall. I pull a chair up to the window and sit down. I pull my feet up and hug them as I continue to watch Peeta.
The next thing I now I am jolted awake by a lot of movement. I see Peeta thrashing in the bed, pulling on the restraints with all his might. I stand up and press my hands against the glass. I realize he must be having a nightmare. I know how real they can seem to be. There is nothing I want more than to run into his room and wake him up and then hold him close and reassure him that it is all just a dream that none of it happened or at least that it is over. A small tear slides down my cheek as I feel some of the pain he must be feeling. I have more than once relived many of the horrible things that happened in the arenas. I have more than once watched tributes die over and over again. I push on the glass knowing all too well that there is nothing I can do but watch and hope he wakes up soon.
After a long time of thrashing and pulling on the restraints he jolts awake. He lays there stiff as a board with sweat running down his forehead and eyes wide open. His eyes seem to scan the room as if trying to remember where he is. I can see he is breathing rapidly and his body is very tense. I can only imagine what he might have dreamed but then maybe I have no idea. I know and experienced many of the same things but the Capitol never tortured me and I have no idea of what he saw or heard during those weeks that we were separated.
After a while he seems to realize where he is or at least that what he just experienced was only a dream. Then he just lays still and stares at the ceiling. I understand because after I have woken from my nightmares I usually do the same thing because I fear that if I close my eyes the images I want to forget will come flooding back and the dream may continue. He seems to relax a bit and I sit back down on my chair. I close my eyes and feel myself drift off to sleep. All the tenseness and heartache have made me tired.
When I wake I look at the clock and see that it is nearly 5:30 a.m. I better get back to my room before most people wake up. I'm sure the doctors will be coming to check on Peeta soon. I remember how they always woke me up early when I was in the hospital. I stand and take one more look at Peeta who seems to be sleeping or at least resting peacefully. I press my hand to the glass and silently promise to come back soon.
Please tell me what you think.