Ch. 1

Saying Goodbye for the Best of Reasons?

My lord, I cannot take your soul." A tall male with raven black hair and shining crimson eyes said in a hushed tone. He stood in his usual butler attire - a simple black tailcoat, ash colored vest, white dress shirt with a black tie, and black pants and dress shoes - but clenched his gloved fists that hung at his side. His gaze was directed between a boys small feet. The silence in the air was enough to drive even the demon mad. Please, my lord, say something. But the atmosphere in the study remained still. He hated feeling this way towards a human, especially when it was conveyed to a child he contracted with. Slowly, the butler lifted his eyes to his master. His small, weak, irritating master. The boy just sat in his chair, the same chair he so often fell asleep in while doing his work. His blue-gray hair fell perfectly over his royal blue eye and his covered eye. Ciel face was making was one annoyance, anger, and, perhaps, confusion. Finally, Ciel spoke quite bluntly.

"That pleading distress in your eyes is revolting Sebastian. Now let's get this over with already."

Sebastian let the shock play all over his face. He couldn't believe the 13 year old was ready and waiting to die! The boy stood up from his chair and stretched is fragile, almost feminine body. Ciel wore a black vest with an electric blue, almost matching his eye, black shorts that fell just above the knee, blue knee high socks that matched his shirt and polished lack shoes. Once Sebastian whipped his face clean of emotion, he smiled his trademark smile, though it was only half-hearted, and bowed.

"Of course, my lord." He purred, fighting to not let his inner feelings display on his face. He reached for the black ribbon that hung around Ciel's neck limply, and began to tie it, after buttoning up his shirt. "I would assume the young master will want to look his best for this, no?" When he finished, to two shared a glance. Ciel was ready for this; Sebastian could see it in his eyes. The question was, could Ciel see Sebastian's unwillingness to kill his beloved master in his red ones? Too bad for Sebastian, his master isn't as incompetent as everyone thinks.

"We are going to do this Sebastian." Ciel commanded drily as the two walked out of the study and to Ciel's bedroom. "I don't want to hear that you cannot take my soul. We made an agreement 3 years ago, and, I am ready to give you my soul." They reached the Earl's room and entered in silence. Ciel went over to the bed and sat on in it; he crossed his thin legs, letting his foot bounce up and down impatiently, and his arms were propping him up on the white sheets. "How do we do this?" He asked plainly, clearly disinterested.

Sebastian waked up to him and knelt down by his bedside; the moonlight from the window shown in his demonic eyes as he looked at the boy.

"I wish to not bore you with the details young master. You seem to want this over and done with."

Inside his head he struggled again to not let his real emotions show. He was a demon for Satan's sake! And he should not feel the way he does towards Ciel! Whenever he was forced to carry the near weightless boy, he got feelings inside him, feelings that made his stomach knot up. He got nervous, though he was a master at concealing it, whenever Ciel demanded something from him that involved close contact. Like the times he had to teach the Earl to dance and when he dressed as a young lady to attend the viscount's party. And the worst was at night, when he bathed Ciel. Though he wore a stone expression the entire time, he knew his face turned red. If Ciel asked him what the matter was, Sebastian at least had an excuse that the water was steaming hot and he had many layers of clothing on. Suddenly, his master's voice broke his musings.

"Sebastian? What's gotten into you? Before you would have relished this moment. You've wanted my soul for so long, I could tell. But now --" He silently stared down at his faithful servant, his blue eye searching crimson for an answer. Well, he got one. Without warning, Sebastian had jumped on top of Ciel, who was trapped underneath his butler's body. The man was an arms length apart from his master, who lay beneath him with a look of shock on his face. Ciel's figure looked miniscule compared to his butler's.

Sebastian's black hair hung from his face, his pale skin and eyes illuminated in the moon. "Sebastian!?" Ciel said breathlessly, "Wha...what are you--" He was silenced by Sebastian's finger over his pink lips. His hand then, slowly, slide up to the eye patch covering Ciel's proof of their contract; he took it off gingerly, savoring the moment letting the iridescent purple join the royal blue.

"I told you before, young master. I cannot take your soul." His voice sounded like silk in Ciel's ears, and he blushed mildly, turning his head to the side to avoid any further reddening. Sebastian lowered his face until it was an inch above his master's ear. "I do not want you dead. I want you to live, Ciel." At this,

Ciel whipped his head forward to face the demons. He was furious at first for his servant using his name, but that vanished when he saw the look in Sebastian's eyes. Longing, adoration, fear, hope, and so many other jumbled emotions spilled out of those crimson eyes. Another silent moment passed between Ciel and Sebastian before the demon pressed his lips against the boy's. Ciel, somehow, felt this was coming, and he accepted it with open arms, or, in this case, mouth. Then, all the unsaid feelings Sebastian had for his master, all the secret thoughts he had, were conveyed through that kiss. Both felt as if they were the only two in the world, and neither wanted this to feeling to be over. Ciel lifted his head off the mattress, leaning into the kiss, and Sebastian took this as a way to say, "Keep it coming." The boy slowly worked his arms around his butler's neck, their upper bodies joining together. Sebastian knew this wouldn't last much longer, so he savored this first, and probably last, kiss.

Eventually, after a few minutes of kissing, arms locked around each others bodies, Ciel pulled back to catch his breath. Sebastian had wished it could go on, that he could stay in that position forever with his young master. But that was only a fantasy, not a reality. He looked into the boys mismatched eyes and smiled warmly, like any person would do to the one they adored the most. Ciel only met that gaze for an instant before looking away, pale cheeks brushed with pink. "Please, Sebastian. My time is up. End my life and take your prize. Make it hurt. Make it reflect my life and the pain that I've inflicted while here." His small hands gently pushed his butler away, telling him the intimate moment they had just shared was history. Sebastian backed off of the bed, his eyes closed to hide his pain, and bowed.

"Yes, my lord." He pulled off the glove on his left hand, revealing his part of the contract. Ciel moved himself so he was leaning against the plush white pillows on his bed, awaiting his end. The demon sat on the end of the bed and leaned into his master. His face got closer and closer to the boy's neck, his left hand gently brushed Ciel's hair away from his eye so the two contract sighs were overlapping. His other arm worked its way around the boy's waist, pulling the Earl towards the demon. Slowly, gingerly, Sebastian closed his mouth around where Ciel's small, thin neck met his shoulder. His teeth broke the skin and sweet blood rushed into Sebastian's mouth. He began to drink the boy's soul, and the more he took, the more Ciel moaned in pain, though he was trying to hide any hint of weakness. He thought that was just like the young master, trying to play a stone hearted and faced adult even though he was a real child on the inside. The more Sebastian took the more he noticed Ciel's body becoming weaker and weaker. He was fading, and much faster than the demon predicted.

He didn't want to lose Ciel. That boy had showed him kindness that demons like him never came by. Ciel was an irritating, arrogant brat most of the time, but there were moments that only Sebastian witnessed that made him care ever more for the young Earl. And after the entire situation with Baron

Kelvin and his estate, Sebastian had seen Ciel at his weakest. For the first time, Sebastian felt like he truly had to protect the small boy from all his nightmares-made-reality. He hated feeling that way but he wasn't denying it. He cared so much for Ciel Phantomhive that he was willing to break the contract, a big no-no in Hell.

Suddenly, Sebastian released his master. Blood stained the boy's blue shirt and rolled down the corner of the demon's mouth. He laid Ciel back onto his bed carefully and stared longingly at him. His long eyelashes slowly parted and he stared back at his butler. The older man just smiled, got up from the bed and bowed, his crimson eyes sparkling. "I'm sorry my lord. But I truly cannot take your soul. I-" He paused for a moment to make sure he was doing the right thing for them both. "I must leave you now." And he turned to leave, coat tails trailing silently behind him. He could feel Ciel's eyes boring into his back.

"Sebastian..." Was all the child said, more for lack of words than anything else. He had no idea what was going through his butler's mind, no idea about the conflicts inside his heart. "When will you return?"

Ciel whispered, with as little scorn as possible, accepting-though not wanting to-that Sebastian couldn't kill him; that he was leaving and may never be coming back. The demon butler just kept walking and when he reached the door, he pulled it open and walked out, not giving his master an answer. He closed the heavy wood door quietly behind him and before he disappeared into the darkness of the mansion and beyond, he whispered, mostly to himself and maybe to that blackness itself.

"Until I can stop feeling this way towards you young master."

Sebastian Michaelis vanished from the Phantomhive estate.