Your name is Dirk Strider, and you are now totally alone.
You`ve just managed to chase away the only person you even care about any more, now that everyone else has moved on, and now you`re all alone.
Jake left ages ago, when he realized that he loved Jane more than me, and then went off and married her. And of course they had to be totally fucking happy, and have kids and stupid shit like that.
That`d hurt, and it still stung today, but you`d begrudgingly accepted it, and although you never hand out with them anymore, they know they have your acceptance.
Roxy had followed in her mother`s footsteps, and had become a world-renowned author, respected and feared by many for both the Lalonde name and the macabre magic that she also supposedly possesses.
Her drifting away had been gradual, and much less painful, as you had parted on good terms. But you still felt that dull pain in your chest whenever you thought about her.
And now Dave is gone too.
The last person you actually gave a shit about is gone now, all thanks to you being a fucking terrible guardian.
You think back, wondering how it would`ve gone if you`d done something differently.
FLASHBACK/LINEBREAK
You were hanging out in your room, catching up on My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
You`d not been able to indulge in this horse glory for a few weeks, due to conflicting schedules. But you finally had a day off, and were watching the episodes you had missed on Netflix.
Just when you finish watching the episode with Babs Seed, who is a total bitch, you get to thinking.
'Dave would never betray me like that, would he?' You don`t hesitate. 'Nah, he`s not that kind of dude. He`d never turn his back on his big bro!'
You smile, assured by the knowledge that your brother definitely loves you.
And then the man himself waltzes right on in.
"Bro," He whines. "There`s no food. The fridge is filled with your stupid swords again! Where`s the fucking cake from yesterday?"
"Ate it." You say with a smirk.
"All of it?" Dave asks incredulously.
"Yep. All of it. And it was delicious."
"Bro! That was my fucking birthday cake! John`s dad made that especially for me!" Dave clenches his jaw.
'He`s showing more emotion than he usually does.' You note silently.
"Why are you so upset about it? It`s just a fucking cake." You narrow your eyes slightly behind your shades.
Then it seems that something snaps in Dave. "It`s not just the cake, Bro!" He yells. "It`s you, acting like you`re entitled to all of my stuff, and acting like a fucking jerk all the time!"
You raise your eyebrows in mild surprise at his outburst. "Whoa, Dave. Are you on your man-period or something?"
He clenches his fists. "Do you see what I mean? You`re doing it right now! You`re being a total asshole!"
You sigh. "Why are you taking all of this so personally? We`re brothers. We do this kind of shit all the time."
"I know that, Bro." Dave growls.
You look at your brother for a few moments. "This isn`t about the cake. You wouldn`t get this angry over something so trivial. What`s really wrong, Dave?"
Dave folds his arms across his chest, and looks away. "I just... I think it`s stupid that I still live with you."
You raise an eyebrow. "What? Why would that be stupid?"
He sighs, and his arms return to his sides. "Because I`m nineteen. I`m too old to still be living with my brother!"
You stare at him quietly for a moment, before saying, "Don`t Jade, Rose, and John still live with their guardians?"
He sighs. "Well... yeah, but they`re... it`s different with me, okay?" Dave looks back at you. "I`m a Strider. We Striders are different than others. Better, I guess. That`s what you taught me."
You scowl slightly. "Don`t throw that shit back in my face. I said those things to make you feel better, and although they may be true, you can`t you that as a valid excuse. I won`t allow it."
Dave narrows his eyes at you, and his jaw clenches. "You hold no authority over me, Dirk." He called you 'Dirk.' Not Bro. "You aren`t my dad. In fact, you aren`t even my real brother!"
His words are like a slap to the face. Your mouth hangs open a little bit, and you just stare at him.
Eventually you get a hold of yourself, and you stand, visibly stiffening. "That`s a fucking low blow, Dave. I fucking raised you, taught you everything you know. And then you go and say shit like that."
Dave falters a bit at your anger. "I-I didn`t-"
You sneer at him. "Yes you did, you ungrateful little shit." Your fists clench and un-clench. "You meant every fucking word."
Dave`s anger seems to grow as well. "And what if I fucking did, Bro?" He challenges. "Would you kick me out?"
You meet his glare for a few moments, before reining yourself in and putting on your mask of indifference. "No." You say simply. "But do you really just want to be strangers?" You question. "If that`s what you want, then okay. Whether you like it or not, I`ll always try my best for you, but if you won`t even-" You pause, shake your head, and chuckle dryly. "Then we can go to acting like we never knew each other."
You slide your glasses off, and look into your own reflection in his shades. "But you should know something." You gently grasp his shoulders. "No matter what you do, you`ll always be my bro. If you choose to stay or go, I`ll be there if you need me."
Dave stares up at you, red eyes still hidden behind his glasses, but eventually he looks away, and shakes you off of himself. He turns, and folds his arms again, but now it looks more like he`s holding himself. "Then... I guess this is goodbye. I`m already packed and ready to leave. John and I decided to move into an apartment near our campus."
You stare at him silently, before putting your arm around him and leading him to the living room, and sitting him on the couch.
"I`ll get your bags for you." You tell him, and go into his bedroom.
He`s taken down his posters, gathered his clothes- everything.
You grab his stuff, which has been stuffed into suitcases and duffel bags, and carry it down to his car.
You return to your brother, and find that he`s standing in the middle of the living room, something black clutched in one hand, and his laptop case in the other.
He looks up as you walk in, and takes his glasses off. "Since I`m leaving your life now, I have to make so that you`ll never want me to come back." His voice wavers, but he continues. "I don`t fucking need you. You`re an asshole and a jerk and just such a fucking piece of shit. I hate you so much, you have no fucking idea. And you`re the worst brother ever. I mean, who makes their kids fight with them all the time? And don`t even get me started on your-" He is silenced by your hug.
As he`d been telling you how terrible you are, you`d just walked on up to give him a goodbye hug.
He sags into your embrace, and lets you hug him.
And you let him go just as quickly as you hugged him. "You`d best be off."
Dave looks at you quietly for a while. Finally he asks, "Will you be okay, Bro?"
You shake your head. "No. But eventually I will be. Just..." You smile at him. "Don`t be a stranger, okay?"
He shakes his head. "I won`t be. I promise."
You open the door for him. "Be safe out there, kiddo."
Dave grins. "If there`s one thing you did, it`s teach me about safety." You aren`t sure if that`s sarcastic or not, but you figure it probably is.
So you smile back, and then close the door behind him once he`s out in the hall.
BACK TO THE PRESENT
You kind of lost yourself there for a while, and now find that you`re standing at the door, your hand on the knob as if you`d just closed it, although you did that a while ago.
So you step away from the door, and you realize something.
You didn`t chase him away, did you?
He`s just growing up.
And... growth is good, right?
Yes. Growth is most definitely good.
So... why does it feel like the end of the world?
You can`t help but think of Dave when he was a kid.
The Dave that loved you so much, and who he looked up to.
You were his role-model, his hero, even.
When did those days go away?
You can still hear the door closing, and the knowledge that he won`t be here with you anymore finally, truly sets in.
"Dave?" You ask the empty air.
Silence.
And you know that, even though he`ll come and see you, and although you would never admit it to him... you were going to miss him so much.
