The Automotive Malfunction

'And I quote,' Amy continued triumphantly, 'Relationship Agreement, paragraph five, sub-section B. 'Either party is required to attend a family event in the company of the other, should that company be requested'. I'm requesting it now, I've put it in writing, and this time, you ain't wriggling out of it!'

'But Ammyy!' Sheldon whined, looking at her pleadingly. 'Wouldn't a re-organisation of the apartment now Leonard's taken the last of his rubbish to Penny's be a better way to spend the weekend? There's so much I could put out now there's room for it…' with that, he rushed off to his room and reappeared with a huge Doctor Who mega box set that could now fit on the shelves.

Amy folded her arms and fixed her boyfriend with a stern stare. Under other circumstances, she'd be quite happy to spend the weekend shut up in his apartment…if only…but there wasn't time for that now. She had to focus. He wasn't getting out of her other cousin's wedding.

'We can do that next week. This week, we are going to Twenty Nine Palms to attend Dana's wedding!' Sheldon looked up from his box set. There was the same tone in her voice that his mother had used when it was clear he was one step away from trouble, and it was hard to resist. Amy was hard to resist…

'Right?' Amy questioned, coming over to stand directly in front of him, looking up with those beautiful eyes, mouth set in a determined line that didn't detract from how soft her lips looked.

'Umm…' Sheldon managed, trying not meet her gaze, because that would only make the back of his neck hotter than it already was, but she knew she'd won, even before he gave up.

'OK, fine! We'll go!' he finished, exasperated. 'But I'm not shaking hands!'

Amy smiled. 'Thank you, Sheldon,' she replied, and moved closer still, tilting her head up to his.

Being this close to her set Sheldon's pulse racing to the extent that he briefly managed to worry about possible angina, before a gentle tug on his sleeve brought his lips down to hers, and then he didn't. He'd so missed this when he was away, although he wasn't ready to tell her yet. She was so soft, so warm, and he couldn't stop some tentative explorations around her waist and hips, resting just above the denim clad curve of her backside that tempted him so much these days… and that was a lie. It always had.

'Wow…uh…OK…' was all his normally articulate girlfriend could manage when they softly broke apart, her lips tingling and swollen, eyes dark yet bright. She'd been nervous the first few times, but somehow he made it easy to improve, and still feeling slightly giddy, Amy mumbled something about the bathroom and had to sit down for a while before she got her breath back. A more exciting thing had never happened – not only would she have a real, live boyfriend to take to Dana's wedding, she'd have the best boyfriend…she couldn't wait.

'And you've got enough gas, water, and a fully charged phone I assume?' Sheldon asked as Amy arrived to pick him up a couple of days later.

'Of course. Such measures are prudent in the desert,' Amy countered, taking a quick glance in the back to check that her tiara box wasn't squashed.

'What is your cousin doing living the in back of beyond anyway?' Sheldon asked as she pulled away, fiddling with her SatNav in an attempt not to look at the shiny pink fabric of her Maid of Honour dress , which she'd insisting on wearing, pulled tight over her thighs.

'Her fiancé is in the Marine Corps, and he's stationed there,' Amy explained, blushing slightly as she noticed the black suit her Bestie had helped him find just before the infamous YouTube incident. Was it wrong that she'd downloaded it so many times?

'Oh, well, OK then. I had an Aunt who lived out in the desert, near Amarillo, and we all had to go out there and visit once when I was back from college. For some reason my father thought it'd be a great idea to take me and my brother camping one night when we there…never again!'

'You don't like camping?' Amy asked, not altogether surprised.

'No, hate it. Amy, I had to sleep on the ground, with only a plastic mat and an old sleeping bag as protection from scorpions, snakes and Lord knows what else! And it's cold in the desert at night!'

'Oh, well…guess that plan's out the window,' Amy replied, almost to herself. No Backwoods fantasy with my Texan cowboy coming true for me then…

'I mean, what was my father thinking?' Sheldon wasn't really listening. 'I wanted to stay at Aunt Ada's with my mother and sister, and work on my thesis, but oh no, I had to 'go off with the boys' and eat beans and sausage cooked over a gas burner, which is not a good thing to eat in a confined space, and practically freeze to death!'

'Sheldon, have you considered that your father may have been trying to bond with you?' she asked then. 'I'm given to understand such activities, analogous to hunting, fishing, sharing some form of alcoholic beverage, are all ways in which fathers and sons interact.'

Sheldon looked slightly sulky at that. 'Well, he didn't do a very good job,' but was uncharacteristically quiet for the next half hour or so. He'd never really considered that. He thought he'd just been obliged to do something he found boring and unnecessary.

The rest of the journey passed without incident, and following the service, during which Sheldon found his attention focused far more on the vision in pink by his side than anything they were supposed to be watching, all ended up back at some families' facility on the base. Dana had been rather surprised to see her cousin dressed as an unofficial Maid of Honour, and even more so to see her with an actual date, and a rather nice looking one at that, but she was too caught up in the excitement of the day to take much notice.

Later, as the band started to play, the insistent need to be closer to her became too much for Sheldon to bear, and, interrupting Amy's conversation with some distant relative, he pulled her aside.

'Sheldon! I was talking to Uncle Ron! He's come all the way from Colorado!'

'Oh.' He hadn't really thought this far ahead. 'Well…I just wanted to ask…if you'd dance with me,' he finished, more shyly than he'd intended.

His blush melted any annoyance she had, and, having sneaked glances at him throughout the meal, Amy couldn't resist.

'Sure,' she agreed softly, and felt him take her hand. As they danced, Sheldon noticed how the crystals of her tiara caught the light, and how she felt beneath the silky fabric of her dress. The skin above its scooped neckline looked quite pink, and he wondered if it was warm to the touch. She pressed in slightly closer then, and his senses were hit with the feeling of her pretty little breasts up against his chest. Amy flushed deeper as she felt his reaction, but he didn't let her go, and a similar feeling grew in her.

He barely let her go until the happy couple left, and they had to make their own way back.

It was dark when they set off, but Pasadena was only two hours away. Even so, as they passed a hotel on the main street, Sheldon couldn't help but remember something Amy had said to him once, when she was upset about the dress shopping debacle…What would it take for you to go in that liquor store, buy a bottle of hooch, and take me over to that motel and have your way with me? Probably less than he cared to admit, certainly after she'd danced with him all afternoon, and he shifted in his seat and pulled his jacket further over his lap in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

They'd been drawn into in an interesting debate on a series of lectures held at UCLA recently when Sheldon noticed a problem with the SatNav. It didn't think they were on a road.

'Amy, did you update this before we left?' he asked, attempting not to sound as accusatory as he would if it was Penny, or one of the guys.

'Of course,' Amy answered, slowing and stopping by the side of the road. 'There must just be no GPS signal here. We'll pick it up.'

She made to move off, but the engine sputtered and stopped.

'Amy, you said you had enough gas!'

'And I did.' Amy's response was calm, firm, and just what he needed to hear. 'There's even a spare can in the trunk.'

'Oh, OK,' Sheldon was relieved. 'Well, I guess we'll just call Triple A and get them to get us home.'

'Yeah.' Amy reached for her phone. No signal. 'Sheldon, do you have a signal?'

He fished his own out of his pocket. 'No…'

'Oh…' Amy sighed, and stared out at the empty desert under the night sky. She was expecting a tirade. She wasn't expecting what came next.

'Amy, you recall what I said about the desert at night?'

'Yeah.'

'OK.' He appeared to be gathering his courage to continue. 'Well then, get in the back, and put this on,' he finished, pulling off his jacket. 'You got a blanket back there?'

Smiling in the darkness, Amy did as she was told, gratefully wrapping Sheldon's jacket around her shoulders and pulling out a thick crocheted blanket.

'Now, we'll keep an eye on our phones to see if the signal comes back,' Sheldon said, trying to sound organised and efficient, but more focused on arranging the blanket over them both, 'but…keep warm, OK?'

Amy snuggled in closer to him. Slowly, by degrees, the skin on her previously bare arms warmed and she glanced up at Sheldon, who appeared to have slight trouble with his breathing.

'Sheldon, do you have a cold?'

'Does it sound like I do?' He should have been more worried than he was. 'It's possible, but I don't think so,' he added, mentally cataloguing any potential symptoms. No, not a cold. Just one of the things I get around you.

'Oh. Good.' He could almost hear her smile, and her shift in position only made his breath come shorter still.

'You know, we went on vacation once, up in the mountains,' Amy murmured after a while, deeply conscious of the feel of Sheldon's thigh against hers. 'I was eight years old. First time I'd ever seen snow…first time I'd ever been that cold…'

'I never saw snow as a kid either,' Sheldon replied, although the proximity to his vixen made it hard to think of anything else. 'I did in the Arctic though.'

'Oh yeah, you never told me about that,' Amy said, wondering why.

'Yeah, and you know…?' He seemed to be struggling to say something.

'What?' The question came as a single breath, soft and husky, that made his palms sweat and his trousers tight.

'Blankets, protective clothing…aren't actually the best way to conserve heat.' His cheek brushed against Amy's hair then, and he felt her shiver in response.

'No? Then what is, Dr Cooper?' Hearing his formal title on her lips was one of the most evocative things he'd ever heard.

She felt his breathing speed up again, coming in short, sharp gasps. 'Well, it's actually, umm…bodily heat…'

Amy blushed and she felt her own breathing accelerate. 'Uh…isn't that what we're doing now?'

'No…when I was there with the guys, we found it was best to be…umm…not wearing any…'

'Any what?' Her question was no more than a whisper.

She felt a deep tremble go through Sheldon's body hard up against hers. He wished he hadn't said anything, while at the same time trying to cope with his mind reeling at the thought of it. It would be OK, wouldn't it; if it was survival…he had to look after her…paragraph 7 said…and social convention…

He took another deep breath. How to put this?

Closing his eyes, he decided on the direct approach so often favoured by Amy herself. 'Clothes.'

'Oh…' Amy let out the rather more shaky breath she'd been holding. 'Uh, you did that?'

'We did.' In spite of himself, Sheldon couldn't help but smile at her just then. 'And up until I saw Missy give birth, seeing those guys…you know…was probably one of the more disturbing moments of my life, especially when they sat on various surfaces without proper protection!'

'Wow, Howard naked on your spot must've brought it all back,' Amy replied sympathetically, gently reaching out to run her hand down his arm, and trying very hard not to let her imagination run away with her.

Her touch brought him back to the present, and the possibility of a very different naked body squeezed next to his…

'You know,' Sheldon began, his pulse racing as his eyes met hers, 'what with your core body temperature running slightly below average, maybe…we could try…just as an experiment…?'

In the darkness, Amy's eyes opened wide. Is he really suggesting we…?

Her voice shook as she replied. 'Sheldon, are you saying you want us to…take our clothes off?'

'Umm…' He couldn't think any more. There were so many reasons why this wasn't a good idea, but right now, he really couldn't understand them. It was hard to say it though, even so, and reached for his jacket. Amy gasped as she felt Sheldon gently slide it from her shoulders, suspecting his action articulated his reply better than his words could.

'That's a little cold,' she whispered, slightly in shock.

'Yeah…' Sheldon was staring at his girlfriend. Shaking himself out of his trance, he continued, trying to sound professional.

'It's cold because we haven't finished yet. Now, I need that silly little jacket you had under it.'

Amy smiled, and pushed her chest out gently as she pulled the scrap of pink satin free and dropped it beside her. Even in the dim light, she could feel Sheldon's gaze on her bare shoulders, pale and almost luminous in a single shaft of moonlight.

'So what about you?' she asked, trying to sound braver than she felt. She reached out, and lightly ran a finger down his tie, causing him to shiver and blush. 'Is this coming off?'

'Yes,' Sheldon replied softly, almost sitting on his hands to stop stroking her hair back from her shoulders. The same glimmer of moonlight made her tiara glisten, and it struck him, for some reason, he wanted that to stay on. Even if everything else came off…

'OK…' Amy licked her lips nervously, and, deciding this was what Penny would do, attempted to ease the knot of Sheldon's tie loose and whip it free with a flourish, but couldn't manage it. It was stuck.

'Umm, little help here,' she asked, somewhat embarrassed.

Sheldon smiled. 'Dr Fowler, are you telling me you can't tie a tie?' He reached down and slid the knot free himself. As he flattened and folded it neatly before storing it in a pocket, he asked, 'So, when you turned up in that…schoolgirl…outfit, who tied your tie?'

Amy smiled. So you remember that, Dr Cooper? 'It was pre-tied,' she explained, blushing as she watched his every move. 'It was Irene's – I found it like that in a box of clothes I inherited after the unfortunate gas incident.'

Sheldon nodded. 'Oh. Well, maybe you need some lessons then.' She glanced up at him, and caught the flash of emotion he was trying to hide. And what do I need those for? Amy's question shone in her eyes. She dropped her gaze then, fixing on the buttons of Sheldon's shirt.

'And what about this?' she asked, tentatively reaching for one. She was both more nervous and more excited than she'd ever been. She wanted to continue, to go as far as they could, and was afraid that she'd go too far, that they'd go too far, all at once. Sheldon looked down at her, knowing that she was most likely aware of his erratic, rapid heartbeat under the thin cotton, and was both terrified and damned if he'd stop now. Instinct led him to reach a clumsy arm around to her back, and she gave another delicious shiver as his fingertips brushed her zip. He would have pulled it too, had he not remembered his manners, fighting for control under a deepening fog flooding his brain.

'Amy?' he asked, her name sounding as soft and gentle on his lips as always. 'Are you OK?'

She nodded. The sound of the zip as it was pulled ever further down her back was the only sound to break through their shallow, laboured breathing that was already slightly misting the windows, until Amy gave a little yelp, and Sheldon jumped back, afraid he'd done it wrong, done too much.

'Amy, what's wrong?' he asked anxiously. She returned a somewhat rueful smile.

'It's OK, Sheldon, just my hair got caught.' Still rather more self-conscious than she was in her numerous fantasies, Amy used her free hand to brush her long, straight mane of hair forward while her other held the top of her dress in place. As her hair spilled over her half exposed bra, Sheldon moaned a little and the almost painful ache he felt further down intensified, tempting him to tug the dress from her restraining hand.

'Come on,' he found himself insisting, one hand on hers. 'That's a variable. We can't have variables,' and gently pulled the bunched satin free. The shock hit a few moments later, although Amy had a way of considerably dulling its effect. With anyone else, the mere thought of such closeness would be unthinkable, but his first sight of Amy's lace encased cleavage half hidden under her hair only pushed him further. She was close enough for him to feel how fast her breathing was, how the fabric alternately loosened and strained with each breath. They stayed close together for a moment, both needing to adjust to the sudden intimacy, and then Amy's fingers were on Sheldon's shirt.

Emboldened now, encouraged by his continued presence and touch, Amy worked the first couple of buttons free, and then stopped.

'Is this OK?'

The simple question confused him. It shouldn't be, but it was. Sheldon nodded his response, and soon, his shirt was lying, folded, over the front seat.

'And what about this?' Amy asked again, aching herself now, playing with her bra strap. 'Another variable?'

He couldn't answer that. Speaking involved too much thought right now, but she moaned slightly, arching her body into his as he slid the strap from her shoulders. She felt how his hand shook tracing the material across one breast and guided it down to the clip between them. Amy sat back, and, keeping her gaze on Sheldon now, let it fall.

'Oh, Amy…' Every instinct he had was telling him to push her back now, to be over her, make her his. There were, however, certain logistical issues to be resolved, namely the excess of dress fabric currently pooled around Amy's waist. Unable to resist it, Sheldon brushed her bare waist before grabbing a handful of shimmering satin.

'Loose the frock, little lady,' he commanded, his accent suddenly marked. Amy shifted a little, and pulled the remainder of her dress from her body, along with her shoes. The ache inside her flared and burned almost unbearably, and she was so very wet. All that kept her from being naked before him were the tan tights of Irene's she'd pulled out that morning, and some very damp lace. She wouldn't be Sheldon Cooper's girlfriend though, if she didn't challenge him back. Her hand was on his chest then, snaking down. He moaned and twitched at her touch, stopping on the smooth leather of his belt.

'Your turn,' she proposed, a dark shine to her eyes. 'No variables.'

Her challenge was a provocation, and he couldn't back down. Some control had to maintained, however. He pushed her back gently, and, struggling in the confined space, gratefully released the strained button behind his buckle and let himself free. Amy smiled as she noticed him pick the trousers up and fold them, even now, and then widened her eyes in shock as she felt his weight shift over her and press into her. Amy wasn't expecting it to be quite…well. It brought home the reality of the situation, and she shuffled back slightly.

'Amy?' Sheldon felt her pull back, and was grateful for the visual clue. It was hard enough to interpret expressions, although hers were easier than most, but this said clearly that something wasn't quite right. It wasn't easy to think straight, even so, with their breath now condensing on the cool windows and his heart pounding as her body rubbed against his.

'What's wrong? Did I do it wrong?' Amy smiled in spite of herself. That was love, from Sheldon. He'd hardly even contemplate the possibility in front of anyone else, much less ask the question.

'No, not wrong,' Amy snuggled back up to him and pulled the blanket over them. Warming one another once again, Amy felt brave enough to continue.

'Sheldon?'

'Yeah?'

She took a deep breath, not sure if she'd regret it. 'Not tonight. I don't want…everything…tonight. Not yet.'

'Not coitus?' He had to be clear on this.

'No,' she admitted, gently tracing a pattern on his skin.

Sheldon let out the breath he'd been holding. He should have felt relieved, and partly did, but there was disappointment there too. He hadn't expected such reticence from Amy, or how hard it would be to…calm down…but honestly, she was right. Maybe there were other things they should do first…

'Sheldon?' Amy asked then. 'Are you OK?'

He smiled, and pulled her closer. Leaning down, he caught her lips in a kiss that for all its tentative beginnings deepened into an intense caress that seemed to burn them like a brand. Amy threw her arms around him, slightly pushing him back now, and moaned into it as she felt Sheldon's hands on her back, in her hair. Her hands mirrored his, and she wondered at how different his short, neat haircut felt to her own as she fell in love with this man, all over again.

They slowly parted, their skin now bathed in a fine sheen of sweat. Sheldon felt himself shiver as her eyes caught his and said so much more than her words ever could. The words spilled from him almost before he even realised, but he knew they were true.

'I love you, Amy Farrah Fowler.' Suddenly she was in his arms again, pressing her breasts into his chest as she held him tight. She was an octopus, but he didn't mind. He never had. Her next words sent a surge of heat between them as a hot blush possessed his body.

'And I love you, Sheldon Lee Cooper.'

They stayed together, holding each other close, for quite some time. After a while, their breathing slowed, and their eyes grew heavy. It wasn't an easy place for such a tall man to sleep in, especially one usually so particular about where things were done, but somehow, with Amy, on the back seat of her car, almost naked, he did. They stayed close, under the blanket, until the first glimmer of dawn lit the sky. Dozily reaching for her clothes, Amy's hand chanced on her phone. There were numerous missed calls, and a signal as clear as the rising sun. Hurriedly shrugging on her bra and pulling on her dress, Amy knew she ought to call someone to rescue them now, but maybe…she could at least wait until Sheldon woke up…Quite what Penny and Bernie would say about the footprints on the roof come Girls' Night though…who knows?

The End