a/n: I'm working hard on getting all my requests filled before the end of the month, and I've found that a lot of the ones left over are songfics, so bare with my while a spit a few of these. To be honest, after the instense plot filled chapters I went through with 'Time of Our Love' these quick oneshots are a nice relief and I find that they are sometimes more intense emotion wise than random songless one shots. After all, it's still Delena which is what we're here for right? Happy Reading.
Dedicated to vamplover2011 (sorry it took so long hun)
If you ever leave me, baby,
Leave some morphine at my door
'Cause it would take a whole lot of medication
To realize what we used to have,
We don't have it anymore.
There's no religion that could save me
No matter how long my knees are on the floor
So keep in mind all the sacrifices I'm makin'
To keep you by my side
To keep you from walkin' out the door.
Damon knew that this was coming, had been expecting it for a few weeks now. How could he not? It was in her eyes, in her touch every time they'd made love. Her doubt, her fear, her hesitation…it's like she wasn't even trying to hide it from him anymore. There was a storm raging outside as inside this room, the thunder clapping loudly outside his window. The window crashed open from the wind, the sound of rain even louder now. He cursed, threw the sheet off him, nearly off the bed and stalked around to her side. He couldn't care less about shutting out the storm right now, there were more important things to deal with.
She refused to look at him, just kept her eyes on the floor, on her panties as she wiggled into them. When she finally stood, he slipped his finger under her chin and forced her to meet his eyes. There was a flash of lightning and he saw the momentary flash of her guards down before the room was dim again. "Don't leave."
Her heart broke into a thousand pieces at his words, the tone, the look in his dark blue eyes. They were always dark after they'd made love. Yes, that's what they'd just done…again. "I have to."
"I don't want you to." He gripped her arms in his hands tightly, pulling her against him as thunder clapped. They were both completely bare except for the panties she'd managed to find.
He should have ripped those too.
"This isn't right Damon." She whispered, trying to step past him, but he held her in place, his eyes suddenly a flashing light blue- the hottest part of a fire.
She knew she ignited something dark inside him and visibly shivered, but she didn't try to move away again. The wind roaring outside wasn't exactly scaring her from going, but she could use it as an excuse to stay if she needed it to. "How can you possibly say that after all this time?" he took in an unneeded shattering breath, stepping them both closer to the bed.
Her knees bent a little when she met the mattress, but she stayed standing. If she got back into bed with him, she knew this would be over. Knew that she wouldn't be able to leave and it would take more time to work up her nerve to leave him, to leave this ridiculous dance she'd been putting them all through. "You know how I feel." Her words chocked in her throat and she tried to force it to clear. "I don't love you."
"You're lying." He shook her, desperate for some of the sense to find her again. She'd come here hadn't she? She was the one that appeared out of nowhere in the middle of the night and seduced him. On a stormy night like this, if he remembered correctly. She'd been soaking wet, her hair dripping all over his rug. She'd pulled off her jacket and rushed to him, kissing him and telling him everything he'd been so desperate to hear since the night she'd told him his love for her was a problem. "You can't take those words back."
She'd said them, she knew it was true…and maybe she didn't regret the truth behind them, but she did regret telling him. "You know this isn't right Damon."
The honesty in her denial was painfully right, and that is what hurt the most. He knew that he didn't deserve her, that she deserved better…but he couldn't let her go. He just couldn't let her go. "I've given up things to be with you Elena, I've tried to be the better man for you…and still- you're still going to just leave me here in a bed where the sheets smell like you? In a house where every room has heard your moans. Do you honestly think that I could live in this house, in this body that you've kissed and scratched and loved, without you?"
The near desperation in his eyes had her resolve breaking a little and she held him, needing to comfort him, needing to make that look on his face go away. "I'm sorry."
Damon wasn't sure what it was about her that made him constantly put his head and heart on the chopping block, but he did it one more time. "I love you Elena, please…please don't leave me."
'Cause there'll be no sunlight
If I lose you, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds
My eyes will do the same, if you walk away
Everyday it'll rain, rain, ra-a-a-ain
Elena sighed, pressed up on her toes and tilted her head to kiss him. Their lips slanted over each other's smoothly, a wonderful primal dance they'd been perfecting. Damon clung to her, held her and pressed her back onto the mattress as thunder clapped again. He moved her up against the pillows, tasted the soft lines of her neck, the hard curve of her shoulder, the salty skin beneath her breasts and down to her hips. She was more delicious than any blood he'd ever tasted, more tempting than the sunlight he knew that he wasn't meant to walk in. If she ever left him, he wasn't sure what his life would be like without the sunlight he needed so desperately to survive. He bent down to kiss her, even as he felt the first tear slide down his face.
Elena felt it drop onto her cheek and brushed it away, wondering if she'd started crying without realizing it. Then she felt the tremble in Damon's lips, the soft, worried hesitation in his touch and she held him closer. She rarely ever saw Damon like this; weak and needing her and she knew that if she was going to leave she had to do it soon. It wasn't fair to either of them if she stayed, made love again and then left.
I'll never be your mother's favorite
Your daddy can't even look me in the eye
Ooh, if I was in their shoes, I'd be doing the same thing
Sayin' "There goes my little girl
Walkin' with that troublesome guy'
But they're just afraid of something they can't understand
Ooh, but little darlin' watch me change their minds
Yeah for you I'll try I'll try I'll try I'll try
I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding
If that'll make you mine
Damon knew how fragile Elena was, and even though their time together had made her stronger, there was a very real girl inside this woman that needed love and comfort just as badly as he did. She tried hard to fight it, even harder to admit it even existed. She didn't want to need him, she didn't want to need anyone because she'd learned over time that the people she needed simply left her. First, her parents had left- not of their own accord then she'd watched Isobel burst into flames, only to have John sacrifice himself to save her. Stefan had left, come back and then stomped all over her heart. She was only defending herself by refusing to let him fully in to her heart. In her own twisted way, it was the best way she knew to keep him around. To keep someone from leaving, fate had taught her to keep them at arms length; well Damon couldn't live like that and he wouldn't for one more minute.
He would continue to work his ass off to keep her here, keep her his…but he would not let her leave until he knew for certain that the reason she was going was because she didn't love him anymore.
'Cause there'll be no sunlight
If I lose you, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds
My eyes will do the same, if you walk away
Everyday it'll rain, rain, ra-a-a-ain
Oh, don't you say (don't you say) goodbye (goodbye),
Don't you say (don't you say) goodbye (goodbye)
I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding
If that'll make it right
Damon tore her panties this time, smoothing his hands over her hips to soothe the sting of pain she'd hissed at when he'd roughly removed them. Then he bent and kissed it better, as if he was kissing away all her pain. "Stop." She whimpered, her fingers in his hair; tugging him closer, pushing him away.
Was there really any better metaphor for them? "No." he shook his head and slid her down on the bed. "I won't stop, and you don't want me to."
She didn't, he was completely right but even as he kissed lower she tried to convince herself that she should go. "I should go." She said quietly, gasping as the first sweep of his tongue against her clit had her immediately writhing beneath him.
"No." he dipped his head again, drawing out more moans from her, distracting and pleasuring her until she was an inch from her sanity. "I want you Elena, and I'm not going to stop until I have you."
She sighed in relief when he stopped, just moments before she came. Her legs were shaking, her arms like jelly as he kissed his way up her body. "Forever."
'Cause there'll be no sunlight
If I lose you, baby
There'll be no clear skies
If I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds
My eyes will do the same, if you walk away
Everyday it'll rain, rain, ra-a-a-ain
Elena nodded, knowing that if Damon Salvatore wanted something, he was going to get it. There was no denying this man anything- especially if she wanted the same damn thing. There were no rules that said they couldn't live happily ever after…so why was she so damn afraid of being with him? Of making everything they were to each other honest and public? He wasn't going to leave her, he'd promised that. Their tongues tangled as he slid into her, the perfect feeling of safety and home enveloping both of them. His fingers dug into her hips as he moved with her, feeling her final submission in the kiss, in her touch. He knew she'd wanted to leave, but for the moment at least he'd convinced her to stay. "I love you." She whispered between kisses, holding him tightly.
"I know." He pressed his lips to her throat, his fangs scraping the sensitive skin and she tilted her face to the side. "Ready?"
She nodded, her nails digging into his shoulder as he pulled out completely, lightning flashed, showing the pearly points off. She shuddered, not afraid- just desperate to have more. He thrust back into her tightly as his fangs bit into her. "Damon." She moaned his name, her hips moving more quickly against his as they rode out the final few seconds together.
"I love you too." He whispered, peppering kisses against her shoulder. "Promise you will stay."
"I promise." She sighed when he rolled over and pulled her tight against his chest. "I won't ever leave you Damon."
It was a few minutes after she'd fallen asleep next to him that he noticed the storm had calmed down a little. The rain had stopped, the thundered quieted and for a moment there was peace. He felt the calm, relished in it, but just as the wind ruffled the branches of the trees outside, he wondered if it was all actually over for good. Elena shivered, mumbled something in her sleep and moved closer to him.
a/n: so, kinda bittersweet like the song. With the way they have Delena going on the show, I just know that when (if) they finally get together, it's not going to be perfect. I guess my writing is reflecting that a little and I apologize, but a song like this kinda calls for a fic with the same mood. Up next: scene-to-shot fics