I like to watch her, but she doesn't know. Even if she did, she'd never say anything, because I'm Abed and I'm allowed to stare.

I know people don't like it. I know they think it's intense and unnerving. But if I stopped, I'd have to stop watching her too, and I don't think I can do that.

In a way, it's an odd catch-22. If I stopped, I'd be more normal - more appealing. But I can't, because then I'd miss all the little things she does. Her quirks and her habits. The way she taps the end of her pencil on the table. The way she subconsciously tugs at the tips of her hair. I can't miss those things.

She sits across from me at the study table and I watch as she bites her lower lip. She's studying for Sociology and I'm reading a book for my Film class. Except, I'm not. I'm watching her face as she carefully rereads her notes.

"Sup," Troy says as he enters with Pierce.

Troy and I clap our hands to our chests as he takes his seat at the table. I look up as the rest of the study group walks into the room.

"My boys did the cutest thing this weekend," Shirley starts to say.

I nod along as she continues her story, but I'm not really listening. Annie closes her notes and faces Shirley. I examine her face as she smiles brightly. Her eyes are wide as she listens and every so often, her mouth twitches slightly in reaction to something Shirley says.

"Awww…" says Annie when Shirley stops.

"Lame!" interjects Pierce, laughing to himself, "Am I right?"

"Knock! Knock!"

It's the Dean. I wave.

"How's my favorite study group doing?" But he's not looking at us, he's eyeing Jeff.

"Sooo….." He says, forcing himself to pull his eyes away. "I just wanted to make sure you guys are all coming to dance this Friday!"

There's a simultaneous groan.

I look across at Annie as she rolls her eyes and crosses her arms. I want to imitate her, so I can feel what it's like to be her, right now. So I can feel how she feels, and think how she thinks. But I don't.

"You can't be serious," exclaims Jeff.

"Yeah," Britta agrees, "How many have we had this year?"

Shirley makes a noise in protest. Her eyes are wide as she stares at the Dean. "I am not going to another dance."

"I'm giving out three elective credits."

This seems to change everyone's mind, as we all shrug and nod in agreement.

"What's this?" asks Britta as the Dean hands around three sheets of paper.

"Oh, Silly. Why, they're clues, of course!"

Troy stares at the Dean blankly, "For….what?"

"For the game."

"Like Jumanji?" I ask.

"No, Abed. Not at all like Jumanji," he says exasperatedly.

"Good," I reply, "I don't want to start turning into a monkey."

Troy's eyes light up. "Man, that would be so awesome!"

Jeff stares at him and shakes his head. "Now, what's this about a game?

You guys didn't think I was handing out the credits for free, did you? Oh, no, no, no, Jeffery. You have to win them."

We groan again.

"Teams of no more than three." He looks around at the seven of us and scrunches his face in concern, "You guys'll have to figure something out."

Troy and I look at each other right away. Our eyebrows raise in silent agreement. Troy turns to Annie, a questioning look on his face. I do the same, hoping to claim her before the others do. She blushes as she realizes what we want and quickly nods her head. We are a team.

Pierce looks back and forth between the three of us. "Hey! They've already formed an alliance. Quick! Who wants to be on my team?"

Britta quickly shakes her head. "Sorry, Pierce. I'm with Shirley."

Shirley nods in agreement.

"Jeff? It looks like it's you and me. We'll beat 'em all!"

"Whatever." Jeff doesn't look up from his phone as he replies.

"Ha! I get Jeff on my team! You guys are screwed!"

"That's nice," says Shirley.

Annie grabs a set of clues from the center of the table and reads them silently. Her eyes widen. She looks at me and then at Troy before standing up and grabbing her things.

"Come on!" She hisses, "Let's go home, we can't discuss this here."

I can see the determination in her eyes, it makes my heart beat a little faster. I know she wants to win. I also know that she doesn't need too - she doesn't have anymore electives to take, and winning the credits would be useless. But she wants it anyway.

I get up to follow her. I don't bother to check if Troy's behind me. I'm pretending that it's just the two of us, her leading me. She's walking quickly, but I speed up to walk beside her instead. She looks up at me and smiles.

I like to think that it's a special smile, one that she saves just for me.

Deep down, I know that it's not. I know that it's just a friendship smile, nothing more. I know that it's the same one that she gives to Troy and to Britta. I know that it's nothing unique.

But I like to pretend anyway. Because it makes me feel like these moments are special, like they could be part of something bigger, like we could be more than just friends. I like feeling that way. I like feeling hopeful.