Chapter 1

Closing the door behind the miffed cab driver Meredith Grey watched him walk back to his car, silent the whole way from the airport his friendly questions hadn't even reached her as she'd stared out hungrily at the passing scenery. She'd noticed every little change whilst lost in memories that for so long she had refused to remember or wallow in. Three years since she had closed this door for what then had been the final time but then fate came into play deciding it was time for her to face the past she had run across the country to her cousin in Boston from.

She moved through to the kitchen, a rare smile lighting her eyes as they took in the mess, so welcoming so familiar that tears burned the back of her throat

"Home… "She breathed into the silence.

Three years ago she had ran, ran away from Finn the man whose love she could never return. From the hospital that she loved and the friends who had became her family, but mostly from the man who haunted her nights only to disappear at sun rise. The man who had broken her who she would love till the day she died but who would never be allowed to shatter her world again.

Richard's call had caught her in the middle of a busy shift to destroy the world she had built up for herself and her son Cameron, with the news of her mothers admittance to Seattle Grace and downhill spiral it had brought her back as little else could.

"Meredith! Your back... Your home" Tripping over his own feet George embraced her holding on for that little bit longer.

"Move over Bambi!" Pushing him out of the way Christina embraced her "You're my person…"

"I'm your person…" Breaking apart they laughed as Izzy moved forward

"I'm glad your back, well not about your mother of course but just glad your back!"

Sat around nursing coffee they filled her in on the gossip all purposely avoiding one mans name,

"You did bring Cameron though right?" It was George who asked his eyes having not left her face once in the past ten minutes

"No he's back in Boston."

"Good because McBaby in the same city as McDaddy McDreamy and McWife… Wow now that would be one hell of a McMess!"

"Christina…" All three shouted.

"Oh shut up, you were all thinking it but Bambi and little Miss Sunshine didn't have the guts to say it."

All three laughed as Meredith beamed

"It's good to be back,"

Dr Derek Shepherd found the Chief stood in the doorway of the private room his eyes set on the motionless figure hooked up to all the machines.

"How's she doing?" he asked his only answer a somber shake of the older mans head

"I've rung Meredith Grey…" Chief Webber turned in time to see pain fill the eyes of his old friend before the shutters came down once more bringing back the empty laughter less look they had all gotten used too.

"I thought you might."

"Might what?" Dr Addison Shepherd asked from behind interrupting what the Chief had been about to say, whilst she pretended not to see the slight flinch as she rested her hand on her husbands shoulder.

"I was explaining to Derek that I've advised Meredith Grey to come,"

A sour look passed over Addison's face "Well, now won't that be cozy the ex girlfriend coming home, I know lets invite her over."

"I have patients." Derek brushed past his wife his body tense as he moved off down the hall seeing nothing or no one but the smile of the girl who had walked out of his life but not out of his heart. Her memory was every where all over the hospital, every time he went to Joe's she was at the bar, scorched into his brain so every time he closed his eyes it was she he saw.

Everyday of the last three years he'd tried to make his marriage work tried to recapture what they had lost but for him and for everyone else to see his heart just wasn't in it. He loved Addison for what they had once had and she'd forgiven him for sleeping with Meredith at the prom but he wasn't in love with her the way she deserved to be loved. He let out a bitter laugh at the thought of the name he'd been christened with in his first week here "McDreamy" those days seemed little more than a dream now and he was stuck in a nightmare.