"Listen…"
"Alfred."
"Yes, Alfred," Matthew added, thankful the man he hired over Craigslist had an easy to remember name, "you're going to see things at this get together, and in my house, that you don't fully… understand. I'm going to try and explain to you the situation, but… Just- don't panic about any of it, alright?"
Alfred paused. "What… exactly am I doing?"
"Let me show you."
.
Matthew positively could not have asked any other witch or warlock to come to his family reunion with him. Not only did his bloodline know every single magician anywhere ever, but… Well. Matthew was never a fan of any witch or warlock he had ever met. Still, his parents wanted grandchildren, or just the knowledge that their little Mattie was happy.
He felt like he was digging low by looking on Craigslist for a fake date, of all places, but Alfred held promise unlike anything he's ever seen. His ad was humorous and detailed anything and everything he needed to know- Matthew knows his parents would enjoy seeing him with someone as… spontaneous and sporadic as Mr. Jones. He was a simple human- but what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them.
Alfred was around the same age as Matthew, going to a local university, and working on the side at a fast food chain that Matthew happened to frequent. He never found Alfred strikingly unhandsome, which was good, and he wasn't too handsome, which was even better. Someone as quiet as Matthew wouldn't be able to grab someone extremely out of his league; his parents knew that much.
Matthew hesitated, before clicking the link on the ad and typing a quick message explaining Matthew's situation and a place to meet to talk more about the plan.
.
About twenty minutes into the "date," Matthew requested they go back to his place to discuss more secret matters. Alfred agreed, and the duo got into Matthew's car.
"If at any time you want to stop, turn around, anything like that- just say the word and I'll drive you back here to your car. I can't have your car in my driveway- I don't want others suspecting anything."
"Alright, Matt. Hey, speaking of, any nicknames you'd prefer? I'm assuming that since we've been together we'd be on a nickname basis, y'know?"
Matthew put the car into drive and headed out of the parking lot. "My family calls me Mattie. A lot of them. You can call me whatever you want, really." His reply got a thumbs up from Alfred, and after a few stoplights and turns, they arrived in front of Matthew's house.
Alfred whistled. "Nice house."
"Thanks. I did some magic and made it cheap and available to myself." Alfred started to get out, but Matthew stopped him.
"What's up?" Alfred asked, looking back at Matthew.
"Listen…"
"Alfred."
"Yes, Alfred," Matthew added, thankful the man he hired over Craigslist had an easy to remember name, "you're going to see things at this get together, and in my house, that you don't fully… understand. I'm going to try and explain to you the situation, but… Just- don't panic about any of it, alright?"
Alfred paused. "What… exactly am I doing?"
"Let me show you."
To Matthew, Alfred seemed fairly ignorant and… up in the clouds, for lack of better explanation. The duo got out of the car, and Matthew unlocked the door to his house. "Don't move past the entryway at first, alright?" Alfred nodded, a little nervous but more… excited than anything. He didn't see Matthew as a threat of any sort, and knew that his curiosity would keep him up at night if he turned back. Matthew opened the door.
Inside, millions of things were happening. The smell of coffee hit Alfred's nose, along with the smell of well-crafted breakfast foods. He could hear a vacuum, and as he stepped in, he saw it as well; running on its own across the carpet in the living room to the right. Matthew proclaimed a few words Alfred didn't understand, and his shoes changed to red slippers. A mug of coffee hovered into the room, pausing in front of Matthew. Matthew sighed, and plucked it from midair, taking a sip.
"They're simple charms- they don't stop unless I turn them off, which is a pain. Turning them off requires so many incantations that I just can't be bothered with." Matthew takes another drink, and sighs. "The coffee's good, though; would you like it? I'm not particularly thirsty." Flabbergasted, Alfred just nods, and takes the cup. Matthew watches him, shutting the door. "Well? You can drink it, it's alright."
Alfred does as told. Damn, that is good coffee. Matthew looks at him, moving a little closer.
"You can back out at any time, Alfred. You don't have to do this." Alfred shakes his head.
"No, no! It's just…"
"A lot to get used to?" Matthew finishes questioningly.
"Yeah… A lot to get used to. A lot."
Alfred kicks off his shoes at Matthew's request. "You can't change my shoes into slippers?"
"It's just a charm on my slippers to make them appear like actual shoes. Charms are easy; actual spells take a little more gusto." Matthew explains. Alfred follows him into the living room, both of them sitting on a pair of worn leather chairs facing each other.
"So… You're a wizard?" At the question, Matthew laughs.
"I'm a warlock. Warlocks are born into magic, while wizards are taught."
"I could become a wizard, then?"
"I mean, yeah, but it's a lot to take in and stuff, y'know? You would have had to start very young."
"Oh… Well- what should I know?" Alfred puts the finished cup of coffee down on the stand next to the chair he's in, and sees it float up and away, presumably back to the kitchen to get washed.
"Hm… my parent's names are Arthur and Francis. They live on the opposite side of the state. Going over there will require a road trip. How much money will you need?"
"I charge 5 dollars an hour, 25 dollars a day. How long will this trip be?"
"I dunno… four days to a week?"
"Cool. Um… am I going to pretend to be a warlock too, or…?"
"Yeah," Matthew nodded rushedly, "That's the plan, yeah."
"What'll happen when your family asks what sort of spells I can do?"
"They… most likely won't- but... Damn, that's a good point. I could charm you? So you can perform minimal tasks? But that has to be consensual."
"Matthew. If there's any chance of me doing fucking magic, I want in."
Matthew started making preparations.
.
"We are leaving the day after tomorrow, is that okay?" Matthew asks later that night, after a casual questioning between the two and what they were comfortable with. Alfred admitted that this wasn't his usual family gathering- not only with the magic stuff, but with more than one day in mind.
"Yeah, that's fine!" Alfred exclaims, putting his coat back on and sliding into his sneakers.
"Oh- almost forgot!" Matthew pulls out his phone and opens up his contacts app. "What's your number? So I can let you know of any changes in plans or anything."
"Oh- here I can just put it in!" After a few moments of fumbling between each other's phones, numbers were exchanged and Matthew drove Alfred back to his car.
.
The next day passed by uneventfully. Alfred couldn't stop thinking about Matthew and the world he had found out about because of Matthew; Matthew couldn't stop thinking about what would happen if his parents found out he told a regular human about their lifestyle.
Their sleep was restless.
.
Matthew drove to Alfred's house early in the morning. The drive was supposed to take seven hours.
"You have everything you need?" Matthew asked, surveying Alfred's apartment. It was run down and a little messy. It looked like Alfred had tried tidying it up before Matthew arrived.
"Yep!" Alfred said, slinging his duffel bag over his shoulder. Matthew watched as Alfred gulped down a bowl of cereal and put it in the sink, rinsing it off before leaving it there.
They exited the living space, Alfred locking the door before they moved towards Matthew's car. Inside, Alfred was surprised to find a tray of donuts and a thermos full of coffee. "I sometimes have trouble staying awake, especially while driving," Matthew admits.
"If we need to, we can switch off drivers," Alfred adds, but Matthew shakes his head.
"I don't think you'll know how to drive this." He shifts the car into a gear Alfred doesn't recognize, and the car takes off, going down the road and eventually… rising from it. Matthew presses a button on the middle console.
"Your car can fly? What if others around us see us?" Alfred asks, horrified.
"The button I pressed adds invisibility to our car. No one can see us." Matthew laughs a little. Alfred takes a donut.
"So, estimated arrival time?"
"One or two in the afternoon, possibly."
Alfred did his best to settle in. He watched tiny cars and trees zoom by. "Can they hear the car?"
"Technically, yes, but it fairly quiet, and sounds like other cars. Besides, if we go up high enough, they can't hear us."
"… Do you have a radio?"
"Aux cord and a CD player, as well."
"Good thing I brought my phone!"
The drive (flight?) is made shorter by Alfred's classic rock.
.
"Okay, okay- I spy with my little eye… something yellow!"
"The sun." Matthew rolled his eyes, smiling gently.
"Nope!" The donuts were gone, both of them eating about six. There was still coffee, though.
"Hm…" Matthew looked around, both inside and outside the car. "The trees?"
"No…"
"Are you sure it's not the sun?"
"Yes, Mattie!"
"I… think I give up."
"It's… your hair!" Matthew guffaws at that.
"My hair? I'm blonde, not yellow!"
"Saying blonde would've given it away!" Alfred argues. The two laugh for a few minutes; the drive is smooth and the land is passing beneath them effortlessly.
"What are your parents like?" Alfred asks.
"Francis – Papa, in my head – is very soft and flirtatious. He's told me multiple times about the wild nights and people he's dated. He likes to cook and sing songs! He was the more… nurturing father, compared to Arthur. Arthur's a lot more stern and bossy. He's very stubborn, and while he's bad at cooking and singing, he's better at sewing and making tea. He likes being called Dad. I was always more partial to Papa, but… Arthur's fun to talk to, y'know? They're both huge crybabies. They bawled when I moved over here." Matthew finishes, glancing at Alfred. "What about you?"
"Oh, well… I dunno." Alfred answers sheepishly. "I didn't know my parents. I was a one-night-stand kid, and my mom died in childbirth. I grew up with my Grandpa George! He taught me how to do real manly stuff, basically- I can survive in the wild and barbecue things and he would spoil me rotten. He always said that he felt like he was born to care for me."
"He's… not around anymore, I presume?"
"Ah, nah… Croaked a few years back. Old age."
"That's rough." Matthew admits.
"Yeah, it wasn't the best- you just carry on the best you can, y'know?"
"Yeah."
Alfred turned the music up.
.
"We're here!"
"Oh, thank god- I need to pee so bad!" Alfred groaned. The car came to a halt, landing on the ground smoothly.
"Be careful going in there! Right now it's just Arthur and Francis-"
"Okay!" Alfred grabbed his duffel bag and bounded up the steps of the fairly old looking house. He knocked and the door opened instantly- though no one was there.
"Uh… Hello?" Alfred asked. The house creaked in response. Alfred's hair stood on end. "M-Mattie, I don't think there's anyone-"
A huge thunderous boom echoes through the house, causing Alfred to shout in surprise. Liquid oozes from the walls, spiders crawl on the ceiling, and anyone else would have known that it was a cheesy prank.
Alfred, however, had the daylights scared out of him. He surprised himself by not pissing his pants. Cackling ensued from all around him, until he saw a smaller, scrawny man slide down the railing of the balcony stairs.
"Hah! I really got you!" He shouts, voice lilting with a thick accent. Alfred's near tears. "So you must be Alfred! I'm Andrei." Alfred, calming a little, looks over the stranger. He has reddish-blonde hair and… glowing crimson eyes. Alfred blanches, and Andrei notices.
"What? Never seen a vampire before, kid?" Alfred's eyes widen- he didn't even think about that!
Thankfully, Matthew enters the threshold, carrying his bag. "Andrei! When did you get here?" He turned to Alfred. "I'm so sorry Al- the bathroom is to the left down the hall. No one else should spook you." Alfred nodded and continued on his rush to the toilet.
"Cute boy you have there, Mattie. I was surprised when Arthur told me you finally found someone." Andrei winked. Matthew rolled his eyes.
"He's easily frightened- you better be glad he didn't pee his pants or else you'd be cleaning that up!" Matthew's voice was stern, but he still gave his Uncle Andrei a hug. "Where's Lukas? I know you two are never apart for too long."
"Lukas! Come down here!" Andrei shouted brightly. There was the sound of fabric moving, and Lukas appeared next to Andrei, a coy smile on his pale face.
"Sorry. Didn't wanna introduce myself quite yet- I thought I could give him an extra scare." The toilet flushes, and Alfred appears, wiping his wet hands on his pants. He moves to stand beside Matthew, a hand reflexively resting on Matthew's hip. Matthew leans into the touch.
"Al, this is Andrei, and this is Lukas. They're both Dad's friends."
"Oh, hey! Nice to meet you!" Alfred shakes Andrei's hand reluctantly, before turning to Lukas to shake his hand as well. "Are… you a vampire, too?"
Lukas chuckles. "God, no. Andrei's the only vampire warlock ever."
"It's a pain," Andrei admits, rolling his eyes.
"Where are the dad's?"
"Francis is in the kitchen, Arthur went out on a grocery run."
"Matthew!" A voice calls from an adjacent hall, and a mid-height, blonde man appears in the doorway. He rushes forward and gives Matthew a big hug. "Oh, it's so good to see you! And this is Alfred?"
"Yeah! Hi!" Alfred greets, and is swept up into Francis' arms and kissed on both cheeks.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Jones."
"T-the pleasure's all mine!" Alfred replies, turning a shade of red and adjusting his glasses.
"Are you two ready for lunch?" Francis asks. Alfred's stomach growls, causing laughter from the others.
"I made hors d'oeuvres!"
.
The group eats – except for Andrei, who gets a glass of animal blood – and small talk ensues. Alfred claims that he came from magic but was raised a human, since his parents died, but his grandfather told stories about the magic community that he learned from his wife. Alfred made sure to mention that his grandfather was a human, while his grandmother was a witch, to see what their reaction would be.
"My… That's quite the predicament."
