I know that I haven't finished any of my other stories but this has been in my head for so long I just had to get it out. The new chaps for the other stories should be up soon, bear with me :) This was inspired by Blue's song - Sorry seems to be the hardest word.
Sorry
What I got to do to make you love me?
He stared at her numbly. She doesn't mean it, he thought to himself, she doesn't mean it. But the longer he stared at her the easier it was to believe that she did. He felt his mouth moving but there was no noise coming out. He was telling his body to move but it wasn't listening. All that he did hear were her words, running over and over in his head. All he could do was watch her rant and rave.
What I got to do to make you care?
"It's all your fault!" she screamed. "We got the scientist for the cure and you KILL HIM?! What's wrong with you? Do you just have to ruin everything? When I'm finally happy you just HAVE to ruin it! This is the second time that you've done this to me! I hate you! I hate you sooo much! Why don't you just leave me alone! I don't understand why you're still here anyway! How many times have I told you to go away and you've NEVER listened to me!"
What do I do when lightning strikes me?
He listened to her go on and on. It seemed to go on forever, he just couldn't make himself move. She wasn't there, she doesn't understand, he tried to tell himself. She didn't know what that man had done had done to us, all the pain and suffering that he had caused. He tuned in again to hear her last sentence. He never thought that his heart could ever break again....but it could.....and did.
And I wake to find that your not there?
"Just leave Alec. Nobody wants you here. All you do is screw everything up. Just leave. You'll make life easier for everyone."
What I got to do to make you want me?
The words took a while to sink in but when they did it seemed like he had magically gotten control of his body again. He looked at her one last time, then turned and walked away. He loved her. With all his heart he loved her. The girl who had turned his whole world upside down, who had given him a name and a purpose. The girl who hated him more than anything in the world. He loved it when she was happy, when he could see the sparkles in her eyes. So he did what he had to do, he left...to make her happy. Even if it would make him unhappy. He did it for her, he always did things for her. She just never realized.
What I got to do to be heard?
He had tried telling her. When Logan had called them over because there was a mission he wanted them to go on, he had asked who they were supposed to capture. Neither of them had answered, Max finally just said that it was important to her and so he had gone. When they arrived and he saw just who it was, he couldn't do it, he couldn't let this man live and so he had killed him. Max had just stood there in shock. Then she left the room and he had followed her out. They got back to her bike and that was when it started. She didn't stop yelling till they got back to Logan's apartment. Even then she didn't stop. He wanted to tell her why but she wouldn't listen.
What do I say when its all over?
He wanted to tell her how much he loved her. How her and Logan were just never meant to be. There were so many things that he wanted to do. Instead he had just walked out, left like she had told him to.
Sorry seems to be the hardest word.
He wanted to apologize but he wouldn't have meant it. And he only apologized when he was truly sorry for something.
It's sad, so sad,
That had been over three months ago. Three months of trying not to think about her, three months of dreaming about her and three months of running. He would move to a new city and leave before he got too attached to it.
It's a sad, sad situation.
He didn't know how many bottles of scotch he had drunk. How many women he'd slept with. Nothing seemed to matter to him anymore. Now that she wasn't there to make him care.
And it's getting more and more absurd.
He thought he saw her last night. That's how pathetic he had gotten. He was even halucinating about her. She was tied to his thoughts so thoroughly that it seemed like nothing could break her free.
It's sad, so sad,
He wanted to forget. He wanted all the memories to go away. It's not like he had any good memories with Max. Teasing her was fun, getting her all riled up was enjoyable but nothing special.
Why cant we talk it over?
Then why can't you stop thinking about her?
an inner voice said. He sighed, Because it's Max, because she is special, he answered himself.Oh it seems to me,
He stared morosely out the window. One thing he didn't miss about Seattle was the rain. He was part cat but the constant sunshine in L.A was getting to him. Giving him a constant headache.
That sorry seems to be the hardest word.
If he could make it up to her he would. He just didn't know how. He smiled bitterly, he was probably making it up to her just by leaving her alone. It was what she wanted, what she had always wanted, he sighed. He was nothing to her and he was never going to be anything so he might as well get over it.
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What do I do to make u want me?
She watched the pain flare up in his eyes as she took out her anger at him. She was angry at him for killing the sccientist, angry at Logan because he found the scientist and angry at herself for being happy that the scientist was gone.
What I got to do to be heard?
After he had left she had gone to the space needle. She needed to think things through. She didn't know why she was happy they didn't get the cure but she was ashamed that she was. Things with Logan were just....she sighed. She didn't know how things were with him. They were two different people, leading two different lives. Lives that would have been better off if they had never coincided.
What do I say when it's all over?
She had gone to Alec's apartment to try and work things out with him. She hadn't known what it was with the scientist that made him to that but she knew that he had to have had a good reason. He wasn't a cold blooded killer, he wouldn't do it for no reason. She knocked and opened the door to be faced with darkness.
Sorry seems to be the hardest word.
At first she thought that he was out but as her eyes took in the space around her she realized that that wasn't true. He was really gone.
It's sad, so sad,
She had sat on his couch and cried her eyes out. She couldn't believe that he had actually left. He had left her. She never thought that he would do that. He was always someone that she could count on to be there, even though she would never admit it to him. He looked after her, he always did.
It's a sad, sad situation
And now he was gone and it was all her fault. She had told him to go. She had told him things that just weren't true but he had obviously believed her. He believed that she hated him, that she didn't want him here.
And it's gettin more and more absurd.
She had gone to all of their usual haunts, Crash, the Space Needle and TC. But he wasn't there. He had really left.
It's sad, so sad,
So she had taken off on her motorcycle. She didn't know where she was going she just drove. She was hoping that he hadn't gone far but after three weeks of driving around she had gone back. He was a soldier and if he didn't want to be found, she wouldn't be able to find him.
Why cant we talk it over?
She spent her days delivering packages. The days just seemed to blend into one another. There was nothing there to drag her out of her depression, no hazel eyes to get lost in. No smirk to wake her up out of whatever daze it was that she was in. She realized now, he wasn't just some idiot who was there to annoy her, he was a friend that she cared about. A friend that she loved. A friend she was IN love with and she had told him that she hated him.
Oh it seems to me,
Another month dragged by and she couldn't take it anymore. She set out to look for him again. This time traveling to sunny California hoping that he would be there. She moved around looking in all the bars but finding nothing.
That sorry seems to be the hardest word.
Then one day she saw him as he drove by on his motorcycle. Wind rippeling his hair. She followed him back to his hotel and was now standing at his door.
Sorry
He opened it and stared at her in shock. He was obviously not expecting her. She opened her mouth and said the one thing that she had wished she could say to him in three months. "I'm sorry."
What do I do to make you love me?
He didn't reply. He couldn't believe that she was here. She had looked for HIM. She had come all this way for HIM.
She looked at him apprehensively. She knew that a sorry wasn't enough to make up for all that stuff that she had said to him. She just hoped that it was enough for a new start. She didn't know what else to do, she was just standing there drinking him in.
What I got to do to be heard?
"What are doing here Max?" he asked, tiredly. Now he was over the shock he felt the pain of her words like she had just said them all over again. He thought he had wanted to see her but now she was here he just wanted her to go away.
What do I do when lightning strikes me?
"Please come back Alec. I...I need you," she whispered. He stared at her impassively. She didn't know what else to say to him.
What have I gotta do?
"Please Alec. We all missed you. I missed you," she continued when he didn't say anything.
What have I gotta do?
"Please Alec. I'll do anything you want."
When sorry seems to be the hardest word.
"I'm sorry."
She looked down unable to face him anymore. She wanted to hear him speak but was afraid of what he might say. He might say no, she thought to herself and felt herself begin to panic. She looked up again and said, "I love you Alec. More than anything in this world and I want you to come back. Please."
He heard her say the words that he most wanted to hear and yet found himself unable to reply. He was scared, scared that if he did go back the same thing would happen all over again.
He didn't know what to do. He didn't think he could handle her treating him like that anymore.
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