Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings. But, I am currently selling portable Legolas shrines over the internet, and plan to purchase the rights to him as soon as I make enough money. AHAHAHAHA! Watch out Leggy! My brilliant plan is working!!! Remember, they're only $49.99! Order yours today!

Rated PG for: mention of the word sexy'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Fellowship Visit Earth

One day the fellowship (minus Boromir cause he's dead & Gandalf because well, just because) were strolling through Fangorn, when all of a sudden Legolas shouted. With his special elf eyes of specialness, he saw an odd glimmer in the air. As he ran over to the glimmer, the rest of the fellowship followed grumbling.

"Look guys! It's a hole in the air!" he exclaimed.

"Oh wow, big deal," said Aragorn. "We're on a schedule here! Galadriel's party starts in two hours you know. I am not missing out on free Pepsi just because of some stupid hole in the air!"

But Legolas was not listening. He had seen a Herbal Essences billboard through the hole and his mind was made up. Before anyone could stop him, he leaped through the hole.

"Wait for me!" yelled Gimli and followed after the wonderful prince of Mirkwood.

Aragorn was shaking his head. "No, there is no way I am going through that hole."

Frodo peered through the hole. "Woah! There's a giant can of Pepsi!"

"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go!" cried Aragorn.

"Does it come in pints?" asked Pippin. "I like pints."

The remaining members of the fellowship climbed through the hole.

Now, Gandalf could've warned them about the dangers of other worlds, if he was there, which he clearly wasn't, or else he would've warned them, and they wouldn't have gone through the hole, once they heard about the terrifying rabid fangirls. But since Gandalf wasn't there to warn them, they went through the hole.

Anyway, moving on..

BEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!! Unfortunately for the fellowship, the hole was right in the middle of a busy street. EEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKK!!! They all screamed like girls and amazingly managed to dodge angry cab drivers and rabid fangirls to arrive at the base of the Herbal Essences billboard, which Legolas was now attempting to scale.

"Legolas, NOOOOOO!" yelled Aragorn. "It's just a picture!"

"I know that!" Legolas yelled back annoyed. "I'm not stupid like some people!"

"Then why are you climbing that sign?"

"Because it might tell me where to get some of that shampoo."

"Ohhhhhh," said the fellowship dramatically.

"What's shampoo?" asked Aragorn.

"Well that explains a few things," said Sam.

"But there's some in that window over there across the road," said Merry.

Legolas stopped immediately, gracefully jumped to the ground, and ran across the street (shooting arrows at cars along the way) all in about five seconds.

"Wow, he's definitely got the urge," commented Frodo.

"What?"

"Don't ask."

They followed Legolas into the Great Clips across the street. They found the hair stylists drooling over Legolas's long, silky smooth hair and fighting over who got to wash it. But as soon as Aragorn walked in, they stopped.

"Oh my god, what is that thing?!"

"Too much grease!"

"MUST GET RID OF GREASE!"

They all pounced on Aragorn and forced him into a chair.

"Somebody help meeeeee!!!" he screamed as a man in a pink shirt with a strange accent that sounded very similar to Sam's started dumping shampoo on the ranger's head.

"Trust me, you'll thank us one day," said Legolas.

After about 3 hours of hard scrubbing, the hair stylists managed to get about 1% of the grease out of Aragorn's hair. "That's it! We give up!"

The hobbits, dwarf, and Sexy Elf all burst out laughing.

Aragorn looked murderous. "This is NOT funny!" he yelled, making them laugh even more. Pippin fell on the floor and rolled into the shelves of hair products, causing it to fall over on top of him. (Fool of a Took!) The fellowship ran out before the hair stylists could even move.

"That was close," said Gimli.

"Yeah," said Pippin, "Where do we go now?"

"Let's go there!" said Frodo, pointing to a brick building with a big yellow sign that said Best Buy'.

A/N: Please review. This is my first fan fic and I would really like to know if I'm any good or if I should forget about writing and focus on something I'm actually good at.

Oh yeah, If you're wondering why I describe Legolas as being so wonderful all the time, which you're probably not but I'll tell you why anyway, it's because my friend and I have started a cult- oops, I mean society called SPET (Society for the Protection of Elvish Titles) because Legolas is not given enough credit as being the PRINCE of Mirkwood in the LotR books. So far, we only have 3 members, but e-mail me if you're willing to join and maybe we'll start a petition or something. YAY! GO LEGGY!