Things I'll Never Say
AN: Kay, so I was listening to some Avril Lavigne and I realized 'Things I'll Never Say' is like such a perfect song to describe Ron and Hermione. So I set it on a day when Harry was on a date with was with Cho Chang.
Just Read. And maybe listen to it as well later
Things I'll Never Say by Avril Lavigne
I don't own Harry Potter otherwise Harry wouldn't be SO angsty.
I don't own Avril Lavigne because she's too cool for me.
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I'm tuggin at my hair
I'm pulling clothes
I'm trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
Hermione stared at her reflection in the mirror, not sure if she had everything perfect. She ran her hairbrush through the stubborn curls and once again attempted to pull it back but the curls sprang out again. As they tumbled Hermione threw her brush across the room in frustration.
She checked her clothes again. Plain blue muggle shirt, muggle jeans and plain trainers. Should she change them or change the colours? A lavender shirt? A skirt? Or would this be fine?
She took deep breaths and tried to calm down as she thought about the weekend. It would be her and Ron alone in Hogsmede. Harry would be with Cho Chang so there would be no one else with them. Oh does he even like me that way? Screamed Hermione in her head.
She went to mirror once again and just tugged at her hair in frustration. She grabbed her jacket and walked downstairs.
I'm staring at my feet
My cheeks are turning red
I'm searching for the words inside my head
Ron scratched the back of his neck nervously as he saw Hermione come down the stairs. He looked down at his feet to avoid her gaze. If he saw those brown eyes one more time he might do something he regretted. She didn't like him that way and their friendship would be destroyed if Hermione knew how he felt.
He felt the blush on his cheeks as she asked him if he was coming. He was so stupid, she thought he forgot. He hastily agreed and helped her with her jacket. He wished he could be this close to Hermione all the time. But that would never happen.
Should I tell her she looks nice? Or maybe ask her if she did something with her hair? Maybe she's looking for something deeper? What should I say? He thought bothered.
I'm feeling nervous
Trying to be perfect
Cause I know you're worth it
You're worth it, yeah
Hermione smiled at Ron nervously. They had gone to Hogsmede alone before, but after the Victor Krum incident, Harry had always been with them. Maybe the idea that Harry was with Cho was making her think this was a date, it wasn't though. Hermione wished it was though.
I know I'm not beautiful enough for Ron. That's why this is only a friend thing, thought Hermione. I wish I was perfect enough for him. He's amazing. She blushed and brushed the hair away from her eyes.
If I could say what I wanna say
I say I wanna blow you away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight?
If I could say what I wanna see
I wanna see you go down on one knee
Marry me today
Yes I'm wishing my life away
These things I'll never say
Ron wished he could tell Hermione how he felt. He loved the way she helped him no matter what. He loved her soft brown hair and her lightly tanned nose. She was so smart and beautiful and he would love to hold her tight by the fireside on cold winter evenings. But if he told Hermione how he liked her, she'd reject him and the trio would become Harry caught between Hermione and him.
Am I doing any good?
It's just a waste time
What use it to you
What's on my mind
If it ain't coming out
We're not going anywhere
So why can't I tell you that I care
Hermione bit her lip as she and Ron walked into Honeydukes. She tried to 'oo and ah' at all the new toffee and chocolate but she saw Ron look at her oddly. Maybe he knew she was acting like she was totally into sweets. When she tripped over a display of caramel he asked if she was okay. If she told him why she was so clumsy he'd just laugh but there was a slight chance he felt the same way. She just shook her head and looked away sadly as she though how stupid she was.
Cause I'm feeling nervous,
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you're worth it,
You're worth it, yeah
As they entered the Three Broomsticks Ron looked over at Hermione. He was trying to be a gentleman but he knew Hermione suspected something. When she tripped in Honeydukes he had tried to help her up but she looked at him and then got up herself. Maybe she saw something that told her how I feel about her; she probably is trying to tell me she doesn't like me back. But I'd give her the world if she asked for it, she's that special but maybe I'm not.
If I could say what I wanna say
I say I wanna blow you away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight?
If I could say what I wanna see
I wanna see you go down on one knee
Marry me today
Yes I'm wishing my life away
These things I'll never say
As she and Ron sat in the Three Broomsticks Hermione held back the urge to lean up against Ron. It would only complicate things as he surely didn't like her. No matter how many daydreams she had of them having a happily ever after like Cinderella. She knew from the beginning she started liking Ron that it was just a dream. If only he'd really say he loved her.
What's wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I've got nothing to say
Ron looked over at Hermione who was sipping her butterbeer. Maybe he could tell Hermione, but when he opened his mouth his brain wouldn't co-operate. Nothing but a little squeak came out and he promptly shut it. She probably thought he was nuts but maybe he was.
Cause I'm feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you're worth it
Cause I know you're worth it,
you're worth it, ya
Hermione shook her head. Ron had probably started to tell her she was acting oddly today but had stopped himself. She had tried to act polite and interested but he probably sensed something. She was more tense than usual. If she ended up kissing Ron by accident she'd never live it down, so she had to control herself. She was doing this for the friendship she and Ron shared, she loved him but he loved the friendship.
Yes I'm wishing my life away
These things I'll never say
Ron wished he could just pick Hermione up and kiss her and tell her what he felt. He wished he could tell her how beautiful and smart she was. He wished he could tell her he wanted to be more than friends. He wished a lot of things that he could never tell her.
If I could say what I wanna say
I say I wanna blow you away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight?
As she and Ron walked back to the castle Hermione sighed. If she had told Ron how she felt maybe the day would have been better. If he had liked her back and given her a huge kiss, things would have been perfect. She could show him how many hugs she could give and they would spend every second just talking to each other without a worry. If had been the word she had used all day.
Things would have been perfect IF she said something.
If I could say what I wanna see
I wanna see you go down on one knee
Marry me today
Yes I'm wishing my life away
These things I'll never say
Ron and Hermione both wished they could say how they loved each other. They both wanted to say how they felt and how they saw the other. They both wanted to say the words locked inside their hearts. But both thought they were being silly. They were scared to speak up: to say the things they'll never say.
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Islay12: GOSH!! Ron and Hermione are so oblivious and I hope I illustrated it here! Also thank you 2002 Avril for your song!!