"Caroline?"
Caroline pushes herself up off of the desk, startled by the sudden sharp call of her name. She stares at her best friend and tilts her head in reflection of Bonnie's. Bonnie looks almost sympathetic, her lips are curled down in a worried frown and Caroline smiles as best as she can.
"Sorry, I zoned out."
Bonnie nods and straightens herself up. "You've been doing this since last week, Care. Are you okay?"
"Of course I am," Caroline says, picking up her pen and scribbling a few random words in her notebook.
"If it's because of Tyler," Bonnie starts softly, worry edged in her voice.
Caroline slams her knee underneath the table and curses, only to be shushed by the librarian. She sends a glare to the peculiar old woman and stares back at Bonnie, ignoring the concern.
"It's not Tyler," she says, waving her hand in dismissal. "I'm totally over that ship."
"It hasn't been that long, Caroline. If something's bothering you, you can-"
"-Bonnie, I'm fine!" She all but hisses.
Bonnie stares down at her book and nods solemnly. "Sure, Care."
Caroline frowns, the smallest bit of guilt running through her. She smiles and nudges Bonnie under the table. "Where's Elena anyway?"
xx xx xx
It's been two weeks since they said their farewells to Katherine - but not so much as sympathetically as Stefan did. It's been two weeks since she saw Tyler properly, since he even acknowledged her. It's been two weeks since Bonnie told her her dad was around sometimes - that he was proud of her. It's been two weeks since she wondered why on Earth her father would even be proud considering she just did something that not even she's proud of.
Caroline sighs and holds the bottle of bourbon close to her chest.
Yeah, two weeks since she slept with the big bag hybrid; and that is definitely something she hadn't admitted to anyone. Not even Stefan.
Not even Elena.
God how would that go down?
Caroline takes a large swig of the drink and shuffles closer to the tree she's currently hiding under. She lets the bottle fall from her mouth with a pop and a suck and winces at the harshness it brings to her throat; but she doesn't mind, because it's better than knowing.
It's much better than coming to terms with the fact that she's pretty much fading away.
She's pushed away everyone - Elena, Bonnie, Matt, Tyler. Klaus.
"You'll never have to loath the darkest parts of yourself that care for me in spite of all I've done. I just want you to be honest with me."
"I will go and never come back. I promise."
"Good."
Caroline groans and takes another sip of her drink.
Good? That's what she thought at the time - no more Klaus. No more feelings. He'd been gone from Mystic Falls - from her life - and she was fine. She has been fine, but then he comes back and he ruins it all. He demands to know her feelings and she's not sure she can admit them to herself, let alone admit them to him.
But she does.
She tells him she's not scared of him anymore, she's scared of the feelings she has - and the things she wants. The fact that even through everything - Jenna, Tyler, Stefan, Damon - she still wants him. She still loves him - but she won't admit so much. Even though he's a monster.
Then what does that make her?
Weak?
Yes, she's weak. She's weak because at the sight of him she finds herself drawing back, putting up a wall that he will constantly smack into if he even tries to compliment her - because she cannot handle his generosity. She cannot fathom the fact he is only nice, and kind, and genuine when he's around her. She cannot handle the fact that even though he bit her - technically, twice - she still finds herself wishing she could be with him - forget everything, and just go.
Explore with him.
Love him.
But she can't.
Especially not now, because she's sent him away, and he promised - and he always keeps his promises - that he will never come back. Not until she's honest with him. So she is, and he goes, and that's it.
That's it.
He's gone.
Forever.
Good.
But what if - no, that's stupid, Caroline - what if she finds him? Does it still count? Does it technically break his promise? But didn't he promise forever? That he would be her last, no matter how long it took? Does that still count?
Or is he really never coming back? He's never going to let her show up on his doorstep and show her the world. He's never going to show her anything, period, because she sent him away - ruffled, post-sex and panting - she sent him far away, with no hopes of returning.
He gave it all up for her - Tyler, Katherine - and she sent him away.
And now she's regretting it because, yes, she can finally admit to herself that she loves him. Of course she loves him. He's been the one to protect her, to fight for her. He gave it all up, just for her. To Klaus, she is his first priority, she is no second best. She is his first choice. For once in the 18 years she's been on this Earth - dead and alive- she has finally found someone that puts her first.
And then she goes and sends him away.
After 'hot hybrid sex' and a very much heated confession of her feelings.
Not in so many words.
Caroline tips her glass to the sky and grimaces as she takes another swig.
Bottoms up to scandalous sex that'll never happen again, because she goes and pulls a Caroline and royally fucks up.
Good.
Well, ladies (and gentlemen?), it finally happened. We got what we wanted and they kissed, they had sex, they did the dirty deed and Caroline finally admitted her feelings for Klaus - sorta. But, honestly? I didn't like it. I honestly hated it. There was no romance, there was just a quick fuck and I think Julie just wanted us to get off her back, so she gave us what we wanted and she's closed it at that, but WHAT HAPPENED TO FOREVER? TO 'I INTEND TO BE YOUR LAST'? Now it's 'I'LL LEAVE FOREVER'!? What?! Julie, no. We wanted FOREVER. We want ROMANCE, and LOVE, and KLAROLINE. Not a quick romp in the woods. THANK YOU for having her confess that, yes, she does have feelings for him, and THE SMILE - Klaus' goofy grin and Caroline's obvious loved-up glow after she kisses him - but please, don't end it there, it's not enough. You let Delena happen, Stelena, Kalijah, Steferine, ALL THAT, but why can't we have Klaroline? FOREVER? Let them explore each other, let them love. God. I don't know. Hope you enjoyed this little piece. It got my emotions out - thank you, Julie, for royally pissing off the majority of the Klaroline fans with your 'hot hybrid sex' and the fact that - to you - that's IT. Thanks. Review me your thoughts.