I would like to thank my very bestest friend ever Xandistra who co-wrote this with me. Read her stories for some more amazing comedy. Also, please read my other fanfiction Her Darkest Hour for more strange fanfiction-ness.
IMPORTANT: DO NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY! EVER! OR ALL YOUR FRIENDS MAY DIE!
Disclaimer: I do not own the awesome amazingness of the Hunger Games.
Katniss Everdeen age 3:
"IMMA FARTIN IN DA TUB!" I yell loudly and laugh extremely obnoxiously until my dad comes in and glares at me. "IMMA GUNNA POOP IN DA TUB!"
My dad runs to grab me. "NO NO NO NOOOO." But I can't hold it in and just as he gets me out, I let it go. It's like a giant stream of poop that never stops coming out.
She giggles as it gets all over him. "DADDY IS MESSY!" She yells and laughs very, very hard and my dad puts me on the potty, but it's too late now. All my poop is gone and she just claps her hands a lot as he goes to clean it up. But then he slips and his head on the floor and his hair gets in the poop. "YAY! DADDY'S COVERD IN DA POOP!"
"How can one kid poop so much?" Daddy asks and she grins.
"CUZ I'M A POTATOE!" She announces, flapping her hands around in the air. "I'M DA BEST POTATOE EVER!" Then her daddy gets up and cleans up the mess, trying not to breathe because it smells so bad. But he can't because he passes out from the stench which smells like death took a crap in the bathroom.
Luckily, he came to and put a gas mask on before calling poison control to come clean it up. "But, sir," they say, "We don't clean up poop."
"BUT THIS IS EXPLOSIVE DIARHHEA!" He yells, "GET THE FREAK OVER HERE!"
When the poison control arrives, they clean it up. All this gave Katniss' father enough to blackmail her for anything in the whole world!