Disclaimer: I'll never own Kuroshitsuji.
Summary: He remembered ten birthday wishes. One shot, SebCiel, Post-season 2.
Notes (Warnings and such) : Well, Happy Birthday Ciel! Oh, and Yaoi warnings, if that is not clear enough. Oh, and mild cursing. Really mild, because I'm not such a big fan of cursing myself. Actually, it's just one sentence.
Ciel faintly remembered making ten prominent birthday wishes in his life. Five foretold his future, one that started everything, one that is meaningless and three that changed his life.
(Making a wish means you still desire something)
(I)
The earliest birthday Ciel could remember was when he was four. The memory was extremely vague; some parts are missing here and there, and he couldn't even remember how it all started that day. All he remembered was the dinner, the very nice dinner they had. His mother was very careful at choosing the menu that night, and everything on the table were his favorites.
There's also that very big chocolate cake that his mother specifically went out to buy for him that day, and it was very grand and beautiful, befitting to the heir of the Phantomhive family.
('Look mama, there's chocolate and cherry and really sweet cream!')
Ciel was very happy.
That was an understatement.
There were four candles on his cake, the boy had noted gleefully, that meant he was four years old now. He's a big boy now, so does that mean he can skip his baths? Does that mean he can skip his Latin and violin lessons as well?
('Why can't I skip them? I'm a big boy now!')
And with one big huff, he blew all the flames out.
He remembered wishing to own a toy company so that he could get never-ending toys.
(II)
His family celebrated his sixth birthday in France.
It was a small celebration, but the cake his parents had prepared for him was definitely worthy for the Phantomhive heir. It was amazing, delicious, and Ciel thought he could die happy just after eating that.
('Can we have that cake every single day for breakfast?')
And there were six candles on his cake.
The young boy had remembered too late; he blew out his candles before he managed to make a wish. He panicked for a moment (oh no, I wanted to make a wish and now I have to wait for next year), but his little mind soon made up with a child's logic. Surely making the wish a teensy, tiny second later means it would still come true, right?
He's only a little late after all.
('I wish…')
So Ciel clasp his hands and wished.
He wished that he will eat a much better cake in the future, although he wondered how anyone is going to achieve that.
(III)
On his eighth birthday, Ciel remembered he was furious.
His mother had gotten him a strawberry fruit cake that day; the cake he absolutely hated most because there were fruits in it and some were really sour and he HATED it.
And she got it for his birthday.
('Why didn't you order that chocolate cake from France, Mama! ')
Ciel threw a large temper tantrum, stomping his feet and all, and stomped back to his room. He left the candles to burn themselves out.
They were not worth wishing on.
('They are all so stupid!')
He remembered wishing he was older, just so he could order everyone about and get his own way without much fuss.
(IV)
Vincent Phantomhive couldn't make it to Ciel's ninth birthday.
At that time, he was on a mission for Queen Victoria. It was a long, messy and difficult mission, but his father managed to send his regards and a birthday present for Ciel. It was a small gun, perfect for a child's self-defense.
Ciel loved it.
The boy was young, but he knew what his father worked as. It made him proud to have such a father, and he thinks that Vincent is very awesome. After all, how cool is it to work for the Queen herself?
So that night, as Ciel at his birthday cake (chocolate, again) and blew out the nine candles with his mom; a small quiet celebration, and the Phantomhive heir knew exactly what to wish for.
He wished he would grow up to be a great man, just like his father.
(V)
Ciel's tenth birthday was supposed to be the happiest of them all.
After all, he finally had two digits to his age, and doesn't that make him very grown up indeed? He felt like the best child there ever was, so he announced exactly that to anyone who would hear it.
('It's my birthday today!' )
That night, after his birthday party, when he was tucked in bed, Ciel remembered thinking that, well, this is the first birthday he didn't have any wishes, because he was extremely happy and content right now.
(And the mansion burned, and there were screams and darkness and -)
It was only a month later that the broken boy remembered that he still had his tenth birthday wish. By then, he was so hurt, fragile, crushed and he hardly believed in wishes anymore.
(They dragged him, as an unwilling sacrifice and he screamed -)
He wished someone would save him.
(VI)
Ciel would never admit it, but one of the most memorable and weirdest birthdays that he kept treasured in his heart was his thirteenth.
His servants devotion, plus Elizabeth and Aunt Frances attendance was flattering.
They remembered his birthday, and celebrated for his existence. That meant the world to him (whether he admits it or not), although Ciel can't help but think that it was futile of them to celebrate it. He was about to die anyway.
(He wished Madam Red was here)
The cake looks ridiculously destroyed, although it could still be eaten. So, for once, in the span of three years, Ciel dropped his facade, and smiled.
(There were candles and that meant wishes and -)
He had wished never to be alone ever again.
(VII)
There was no celebration on his fifteenth birthday.
Instead, Ciel watched as a group of very familiar people stopped by a gravestone. A woman with blonde hair broke down and cried, her wails ringing through the air. She was accompanied by a purple haired male, and a blonde haired man. The three of them cried as though as they are trying to outdo each other.
(Elizabeth, Finny, Soma, everyone…)
Behind them are Bard and Meyrin. His former servants are working in Elizabeth's house now, and Prince Soma had become a close friend to his former fiancée. The reason why they, as a group, visits his grave for two years straight now.
The truth never came out, and they really thought he died.
Ciel felt bad, knowing he lied to them purposely, but it was better this way. It's better to cut off all relations now then later, considering his current situation.
('Happy Birthday, my lord.')
('Don't lie; it's not a happy day at all.')
Ciel was supposed to be dead.
He wished he could meet them again, just so that he could give them a proper goodbye, an explanation. He wished he could have celebrated his birthday one more time with them.
But dead people don't celebrate their birthdays.
(VIII)
On his fiftieth birthday, something changed.
This eternal existence of his...He had come to realize it was far too lonely for him to continue like this, alone. So alone, even with his constant companion by his side, never questioning, never asking for anything, but …
(He's so lonely that it's driving him mad)
It took more or less fifty years to break him down, to make him do what he wanted to do tonight.
So on that night, he clasps his hand and wished hard, for the first time in decades. He wished, and wished, because, if this works, then perhaps he won't be so lonely anymore.
(The silence is killing him inside)
In front of him is a small chocolate cake, a testament to how far he had changed over the years. How the mighty have fallen.
(Years ago, he would had demanded something big, something grand)
There were no candles, because candles remind him of the fire so long ago, and four decades couldn't possibly erase his fear of them. Fire had destroyed everything, every single thing, and Ciel loathe the element.
He wished for strength, strength to do what he needed to do, something put off for so long. Then, he takes a deep breath, and turned around, meeting the eyes of his companion.
(The contract on his right eye throbbed)
Ciel says sorry.
(IX)
On his hundredth birthday, the little human-turned-demon can't help but think of how his life has turned out so far.
Everything had turned out so different, so unexpected.
He could feel a wry smirk on his lips. Everything was different from what he expected. He lived when he is supposed to die. He became an immortal even when he was supposed to cease to exist forever. He will never grow up; even if that was the very thing he was pretending to be as.
His pride is somewhat humbled now, although not much, it was prominently different. He acted more human than he was one, which is pretty ironic in itself. He was finally living his life when he was supposed to be dead.
(And his demon became his guardian angel)
If someone had told him he would have fallen in love with a demon when he was human, Ciel would have told that person to fuck off and go die, manners be damned. Back then, it was equivalent to loving your incoming death.
(I love him)
A century later, he couldn't be sure. A hundred years brought about massive changes, and Ciel had no doubts that the old him would laugh and scoff at the new him.
Not that that matters anymore.
So on his hundredth birthday, Ciel made an odd, odd wish, one he never thought of ever making.
He wished Sebastian would love him back.
(Sebastian kissed him that night)
(X)
It's his two hundredth birthday today.
Or twentieth, as his facebook had updated him on. That fake number stared up at him from the IPad in his hands, and Ciel closed the digital gadget with a snap.
It's his birthday today. That meant a wish.
He can't believe he remembered that.
Ciel knew it's ridiculous, but after some successful wishes, he can't help but thinks that either Sebastian has mental powers (well, they could feel each others emotions through the contract now), or that the wishes were actually working.
So he wished. He clasps his hands and wishes.
(I wish…)
The chocolate cake is in his IPad (an odd app, but they have an app for everything nowadays) and Ciel wished on it. Oh, the real cake is coming home after this (Sebastian's baking it especially for him), but for now, this is sufficient.
He wished to stay with Sebastian forever.
(I love you)
When he opened his eyes, he was greeted with a bouquet of white roses; his favorite flowers. There was a beautiful ring in the middle of the white flowers, a simple band with a pretty blue sapphire, circled by small diamonds. It reminds the little demon of their contract.
Ciel stared.
Sebastian smiled.
(Those ruby red eyes, glittering, glimmering, shining with happiness, so beautiful, so-)
"Marry me?"
And Ciel thinks that he doesn't need those birthday wishes anymore.
(∞)
The absence of wishes means your life is complete.
Author's note: Happy Birthday Ciel! The story says I publish this in 13th December, but where I live, it's already 14th, so yeah. Oh, and I hope you guys enjoy the short story. :)