First Kiss by EdenAdvance
DISCLAIMER: Earth 2 and it's characters don't belong to me; I made no profit and no copyright infringement was intended.
Julia was lying on her cot, trying to sleep, but failing miserably.
She kept thinking about Alonzo, what he had said to her. Everything he had said had been true. Her mind was waging a new war now, one that could change the outcome of the first war. First she had had no reason not to betray the group, although she didn't like her mission. Now there was Alonzo, he had kissed her, and she had kissed him back. She had done something that surprised her. What if he really loved her?
Who was she fooling, he was just searching for a new girl, not that there was much choice. But wasn't he doing things, helping her, listening to her?
"Let me help you with that."
She sighed, still not sure what to do with the situation. Reilly was pushing her, contacting her more often. With Alonzo's leg healed, she had more time on her hands than before. She thought back, analyzing her situation, the way she had learned to, the way the Council had taught her.
"I don't know how to thank you..."
"You should take credit for who you are..."
"Then I need to do this..."
Had he kissed her as a way to thank her?
"What did that kiss mean to you...?"
"I'm glad it happened and I enjoyed it.... and I care about you..."
Did he really care about her? He did say that he didn't know what came after caring for her and that it was the truth. And she had told him a lie...
"What did that kiss mean to you?"
"It means we made a mistake."
"ONE kiss? Haven't you ever kissed a guy before?"
"Yes."
She hadn't kissed a guy before, all the guys she knew were afraid of the consequences, her mother and the Council. The Council did own her... or was that a lie too? Didn't the Council make her? Had they told her lies for 25 years long?
"Nobody made you Julia. No matter what they did to your genes." He had said.
He was right about all the other things though; she did feel miserable, because she couldn't explain her feelings about him. And she had brushed him off, saying that she couldn't think of them, she had better things to do. After he had sat down again, she walked back to her tent, hoping nobody would see her tears.
Now, she was still in her tent. The tears had stopped a while ago, when she started analyzing things... and Alonzo. She cursed herself. Why had she ever kissed him?
:: Because you wanted it:: the tiny voice in her head said.
"You surprise me..."
"I'm surprising myself actually."
She had never dared to kiss a guy before, not that she ever had the occasion. When Alonzo had stood behind her, she was afraid, afraid of the things he was going to do, afraid that she couldn't find a reason not to kiss him back. But when he kissed her, all her thoughts had fled from her mind. When she could think rationally again, she had gone to him, trying to tell him about her situation.
"I was put here for a reason..."
She had hoped he would understand what she had meant, hoped that he would ask about the reason. But no, all he could think about was her, what she thought about that kiss. That one kiss that changed her mind when Reilly had contacted her again. She hadn't answered, hoping that Alonzo would understand her and that he would help her, trust her. Bess was right, she did need someone to trust. Her mind switched tracks, wondering how Bess had known about her and Alonzo.
:: Maybe because you stared at him for an hour?::
She got up from the cot and walked to the tent flap. He was still sitting there, on the same rock. Was he waiting for her? Waiting, hoping she would change her mind? If it was true, how did he know that she didn't mean a thing she had said, that she had lied?
She closed the tent again, but didn't move. Should she go to him? Should she tell him about Reilly? Last time she didn't had the guts to tell him. Slowly she opened the tent again and took a few steps in his direction. She looked around, hoping no one would notice her, standing in front of her tent. Slowly she took some more steps towards Alonzo. From his point of view, he couldn't see, since a view trees hid her. Just a few more steps, then he would be able to see her. He was still looking away, up to the sky. Was he thinking about his days as a pilot? She took some more steps.
"Alonzo....?"
© 1999, written by EdenAvance.