Title: Wand
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Just a humorous, possibly offensive drabble. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Genre: Humor
Time Frame: Whenever
Status: Standalone (To be Continued?)
Disclaimer: Sorry, this is all Warner Brothers... I mean J.K. Rowling... coughs
Author's Note: I just thought of this and it yelled at me to write it. Dun hurt me.
The site he witnessed terrified him more than any encounter with Voldemort.
The scarred wonder ran down the stairs, away from Dudley's room, as fast as possible, scarred now in another sense. He ran smack into Uncle Vernon who quickly stepped back and got red in the face as if Harry had contaminated him. He made as if to brush off the 'Essence of Harry' off him, idly wondering if he could market that as cologne. "Essence of Vernon" . . . All the ladies would love it. Putting aside those thoughts, he barked at his nephew.
"What's gotten into you, boy?" He said this nastily in the "What have you done wrong NOW?" sense, not a caring sort of way at all.
"Well..." Harry began hesitantly, "Dudley was... playing with his wand."
"What?" roared Vernon, thoughts of cologne long gone "My boy does not do any of that magical nonsense, do you hear me?!"
"It wasn't that kind of wand..." Harry muttered.
Uncle Vernon turned purple.
Author's Follow-up: If you dun get it, you dun wanna! XD
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Just a humorous, possibly offensive drabble. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Genre: Humor
Time Frame: Whenever
Status: Standalone (To be Continued?)
Disclaimer: Sorry, this is all Warner Brothers... I mean J.K. Rowling... coughs
Author's Note: I just thought of this and it yelled at me to write it. Dun hurt me.
Wand
The Boy Who Lived decided that he needed a shower. On the way down the
hall to the guest bathroom (naturally the worst one) he heard some
bizarre sounds emitting from Dudley's room. Intrigued and hoping to
catch Dudley in trouble for once, Harry peered in.The site he witnessed terrified him more than any encounter with Voldemort.
The scarred wonder ran down the stairs, away from Dudley's room, as fast as possible, scarred now in another sense. He ran smack into Uncle Vernon who quickly stepped back and got red in the face as if Harry had contaminated him. He made as if to brush off the 'Essence of Harry' off him, idly wondering if he could market that as cologne. "Essence of Vernon" . . . All the ladies would love it. Putting aside those thoughts, he barked at his nephew.
"What's gotten into you, boy?" He said this nastily in the "What have you done wrong NOW?" sense, not a caring sort of way at all.
"Well..." Harry began hesitantly, "Dudley was... playing with his wand."
"What?" roared Vernon, thoughts of cologne long gone "My boy does not do any of that magical nonsense, do you hear me?!"
"It wasn't that kind of wand..." Harry muttered.
Uncle Vernon turned purple.
Author's Follow-up: If you dun get it, you dun wanna! XD