Title Trying and Waiting
Author Uozumi
Genre Romance
Rating PG-13
Disclaimer I do not own nor claim to own this. The characters, ect...contained within are not my property. This is an act of fandom and I do not make a profit from this endeavor.
Summary Someday she will kiss him. Luffy/Nami.
WARNING Implied rape from years past. Nothing graphic, explicit, or specific.
Note Yes, I know I've promised the other side to Private Moments, but this just popped into my head and is screaming to be written. And yes, I know that the language is somewhat ambiguous, but I'm not referring to sex here.

Trying and Waiting

It had been three months and still she flinched away. Her arms protectively over her, she averted her eyes. "Sorry."

"It's okay," he told her. He always told her that.

"No, it's not…" She shook her head, her posture withdrawing slightly as though she was trying to make herself as small as possible and angle herself as far away from him as possible.

He looked away from her, used to it now. The breeze from the sea ruffled his hair, his straw hat down his back from the gust. This had been going on for many nights for a very long time now. They had been trying up on the open deck in calm weather where surprisingly their crewmates would never find them.

"Luffy…" her voice died and she closed her eyes, taking a few shaky steps towards him. Stopping, she watched him worriedly. This was the pair without their masks. Nami was unsure and cautious, Luffy patient and understanding. She was supposed to make the first move even if it would take several more months.

The first time they tried had been in his room when she returned his hat. She had come so close to kissing him, close to expressing her thanks for what he did for her, but she had violently distanced herself across the room and then burst into tears. Luffy hadn't known what to make of it and tried to walk towards her, but she only shrieked and threw a nearby object at him. Later she had explained it to him and said that she still wanted to kiss him, she just never wanted to try it bellow the deck ever again.

So here they were now above the deck with a small sliver of a moon setting early late at night.

"Don't move," she instructed. It was an idea of hers. If he didn't move, maybe it would be okay.

Luffy clutched the railing and waited. The last time they had tried, they had come very close but at the last moment, she had jumped back and left him on the deck alone. He knew that could happen again, that was how most of these nights ended. Luffy was a naturally impulsive and childlike person, but somehow he fought from kissing her first. He wanted to, but she had to be the one to call the shots. He didn't want to compromise their friendship because he was tired of waiting. Somehow, he always managed to keep his mental capacity at seventeen rather than seven in these situations.

Her lips came very close. He could feel her breath right on him, but then she backed off and was several paces away from him. She kept her body angled away and didn't look at him. She opened her mouth to say something. She had tried letting him kiss her and now she had tried kissing him but always she panicked in the end. She knew that she might be physically free of her former crew but she wasn't mentally free, not yet if ever.

"I…" she finally spoke, her voice trailing before returning, "can't."

There was silence. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. Some nights he would say something consoling or as consoling as he could manage and other nights he would say nothing.

"It's not you," she said, repeating a sentence she had said many times to him. "It's not you," she said it quieter, not really to him. Then she turned towards the stairs that led down to where her room was. "Good night."

"Night."

Luffy didn't watch her go down the stairs and simply looked out at the water. Part of him screamed that she would never kiss him and he should just go for it, but another part, the louder part, told him to keep waiting. Luffy hated waiting, but he was stomaching it for her.

The End

Ah…yes, 1:00 and I have to get up in six hours…If this seemed OOC, put them into the situation and then think about it. Luffy has shown that he isn't always insane and Nami has shown us that she has scars from Arlong, so that's why I think that these characterizations are justified.

Uozumi