A/N: Eh. I don't know. I felt like writing a one-shot. I know I should be working on RMA or something, but I really don't feel like it right now. XD Basically, I took a few themes off of some people's 100 themes list, just to get some ideas to write, and this happened to be the result of one of them. This theme was based on 'fever.' It gets a little bold at the end, but there's nothing too extreme about it.

Hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own SP.

Warnings: Kyman. A sick and dominant Cartman. ;D

He grabbed another Kleenex from the nightstand on his bed, blowing his nose noisily into the fabric. Being sick totally sucked.

Feeling like crap, not being able to move out of bed all day long... it was the worst thing in the world. The only plus was getting to miss school, but with as bad as he felt, it was almost not worth it at all. And that was a stretch for Eric Cartman to say.

Still, he skipped school and class all the time. Only, he did it when he was fine; not when he had a fever of a hundred and two. It was much more worth it then.

His mother had insisted that he stay home today, too. At first he was totally against the suggestion that he stay in bed all day, but as the day wore on he was beginning to agree with her.

He sneezed again, head throbbing as he flopped it back against the pillows. Groaning, he made a silent promise to himself to never go to a fucking arcade again. Retarded sick brats...

There was a light knock on his door. His ears perked up at the sound, though he figured it was just his mother checking on him again. God, he swore if she gave him any more of that goddamned medicine, he would-

"Come in." he said in a hoarse voice. He grabbed his scorching throat with one of his clammy, cold hands, thinking that it would make him feel a little bit better. It didn't.

Much to his surprise, the person who opened the door and walked in wasn't his mother. In fact, it was probably one of the last people he wanted to see at the moment.

"Wow, dude, you look pretty damn bad." Kyle chuckled lightly as he closed the door behind him. He eyed Cartman in the bed carefully, almost feeling for him when he saw his red nose and the tissues scattered all over his bed.

Cartman cleared his throat and swallowed painfully before he addressed Kyle. "What do you want, Jew?"

Kyle winced at Cartman's rough voice, walking over and setting down a small stack of books on the desk across the room. He pulled a few papers out of the top book, setting them to the side. "I'm just bringing you the homework that you missed-"

"You know I'm not gonna do it." Cartman argued weakly, clearing his throat again.

Hesitantly, Kyle turned around and smirked at Cartman, though he was more on the verge of frowning at his state. "I know." he nodded in acknowledgment, "I know you're not. I just thought I would, you know. Just in case."

Cartman blinked at this, perplexed by Kyle's odd behavior. There was no way that he would bring him homework out of his own goodwill. Something must have forced him to do it. "All right, who forced you to do this?" he asked, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Stan." Kyle answered without missing a beat, picking up the books that he needed. "The teacher asked for one of us to do it, so we had a rock-paper-scissors match and I lost. So here I am, and here I go." he walked towards the door, ready to leave. "See you later."

Cartman grunted, about to let him leave before he blurted out a, "Wait, Jew." When Kyle turned around to listen to him, he continued very painfully, "Is my mom still here? I need more tissues."

"Hm?" Kyle hummed, tilting his head, "Oh, no. She was leaving as I walked up. She let me in before she drove off."

"Oh." Cartman mumbled, looking towards the window. Goddammit, that stupid whore! What in the hell was she thinking, leaving him at home sick to fend for himself?! He needed more tissues, dammit!

Kyle, waiting awkwardly through Cartman's silence, watched as he seemed to get angrier and angrier. Feeling for the poor guy, -since he was always caring to everyone, including Cartman when he was actually decent- he decided that he might actually try and help him out for once. It's not like Cartman could really try anything on him now anyway; not in this state."Uh..." he started in a slow, unsure voice, "I can get some more for you if you really need them."

Cartman immediately cringed, looking at Kyle like he was crazy. There was no fucking way that he was going to let this stupid Jew mother him! That was just wrong! He would be acting like a total pussy if he let Kyle do anything for him! "No way, Jew!" he exclaimed, tossing the covers off of his aching body. "I can get them myself."

To prove his point, he swung his legs over the edge of his bed and braced his hands on the bed in order to lift himself up. He stood with ease, but was only stable for a second when his head went completely light. His vision began to blur instantly and he had to close his eyes, which only caused him to stumble. Goddammit, he got up too fast! Fucking dizzy spell...

Kyle noticed Cartman's awkward stumbling and immediately rushed over to help him. "Dude, hold on!" he barked, grabbing hold of Cartman's shoulder as he tried to hold him still. "You're too sick. Sit down." he commanded, guiding him to sit back down on the mattress.

Cartman growled, shaking his head and glaring at Kyle as the dizziness subsided. "No, I'm not! And don't touch me, you dumb Jew! I don't want to get any sicker than I already am! It sucks the way it is!"

"I won't give you a fucking disease just by touching you, dumb ass." Kyle growled back, almost shaking with anger at Cartman's pure stupidity. Before he could let Cartman retort back, he quickly left the room, grabbed a fresh box of Kleenex from out of the bathroom and returned, shoving it roughly into Cartman's hands. "Here." he said loudly, "I hope you're happy now."

Cartman merely 'humphed' in reply, yanking a tissue out of the box and blowing his nose into it. Kyle cringed at the obscene way Cartman blew his nose, scrunching his own nose up in disgust. "Dude, can't you do that a little more... politely?"

"Not for you," Cartman smirked, throwing the tissue somewhere behind him. Feeling a little bit better than he did before, he made another move to get up off the bed, intent on redeeming himself in front of this Jewish retard. "Now, if you'd excuse me, I'd like to get a drink."

As soon as he tried to stand up again, Kyle shook his head and rolled his eyes. "Retard," he muttered under his breath, "Don't you fucking learn?" Though he knew this wasn't probably going to end well, he made no move to help Cartman. He could fall on his ass all by himself.

This time, however, Cartman did a little bit better with keeping himself stable. Because he made sure to get up slower, he wasn't hit with a dizzy spell...

...until he was right in front of Kyle.

The light feeling in his head hit him like a shot to the chest, and he nearly doubled over as he ungracefully lost his balance. Before Kyle had time to react, Cartman was falling on top of him, sending the both of them crashing to the ground. And it wouldn't have been so bad if their lips didn't press together in the process.

Too stunned to budge an inch, they both laid there; sprawled out on the floor; Cartman on top of Kyle; their lips pressed together gently. Kyle's mind was screaming at him to pull away, but for some reason his body wouldn't listen. Cartman, on the other hand, was too busy mentally beating himself over the head for falling in front of Kyle again to notice their awkward... position.

Cartman soon moved his tongue to lick his lips in preparation to cover up his mistake, but forgot that they were still pressed to Kyle's. It instead managed to brush against Kyle's lips, causing the boy to let out an involuntary moan at the action. Kyle's body freaked at this and decided to do a complete one-eighty on him, crushing Cartman's lips harder against his. His hands reached up and tangled in Cartman's soft brown hair, bringing them even closer together.

What in the hell was his body thinking?! It was like... it was like it had a mind of its own!

As Kyle pressed his lips harder against his, Cartman responded in the same manner, knocking Kyle's hat off of his head and threading his fingers through curly, red locks. Kyle groaned again in response, so he took this chance to slip his tongue experimentally into Kyle's open mouth. The reaction he earned was stellar, and it caused him to fully straddle Kyle so he could dominate him completely.

When they both found themselves running out of air, they pulled away from each other, panting from the sheer heat of the moment they just shared together. Kyle stared back up at Cartman with glazed eyes, panting like he had just run a mile; his cheeks were flushed almost as much as Cartman's feverish ones. A devilish smirk formed on Cartman's face when he noticed this, and he leaned in to capture Kyle's lips once again.

"C-Cartman," Kyle stuttered, the feeling of Cartman's body heat mixing with his making him lightheaded. He could only imagine what Cartman was going to do to him now. Somehow, though, he didn't exactly mind. Still, that didn't stop him from protesting. "Y-You're gonna get me sick."

Cartman merely chuckled at this, reveling in the feel of a certain Jew squirming underneath him. He grabbed both of his wrists in one of his hands, pinning them above his head with ease. "You think I care?" he whispered huskily as he descended on Kyle's lips, shutting him up for good.

Maybe getting sick didn't suck so bad after all.

So there you go. Just a short little story that hopefully satisfies the Kyman fan. XD I hope. It's up to your imagination what they do next, whether it's naughty or nice. And this probably won't be something that I continue since it was just something I came up with real quick to get the writing out of my system. There's another one that I wrote that I may post sometime later, even though I think it's pretty much a fail. I took a few themes from different people, too, so there may be that many more to come. We'll see.

Anyway, let me know what you thought of this! Was the idea good or not? Too long? Too short? Was the kiss hot or not hot enough? Should I do another one-shot or should I just stick to the longer chapter stories that I normally write? Anything goes~ ;D

I hope you enjoyed it! Until next time,

-Soul