Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and I most certainly don't own the Nine Inch Nails lyrics involved in this fic.
Warnings: Slash, fangirl!Hermione, and the naughty words that are in the lyrics.
Harry Potter had thought that the most embarassing moment in his life had been hidden well in the past, along with old fan mail and silly crushes on girls. His 25th birthday had proven that, in fact, there were things that could surpass getting caught in a broom closet with several Hufflepuffs in various stages of undress. Indeed, The Bubble Orgy fiasco of '97 (what he preferred to call it, should he be forced to mention it out loud) now seemed more like a naked romp through fuzzy flowers rather than the naked romp through leering faces it once had been.
Granted, this new and improved embarassing moment had been followed by the best sex he had ever had in his life. He wasn't sure if his bruised ego could win the battle over his sated apetite at the moment. He glared at Draco Malfoy, who was lying, in all his naked glory, in the direct middle of the bed, asleep and snoring softly. Draco's leather pants hung over a chair in the background, gleaming tauntingly in the moonlight. Harry flinched at the memories. He could still hear music from the living room, which meant people were still awake, still talking about it, probably sniggering at what they correctly assumed had gone on in his bedroom.
A little warning light should have gone off in his head when, a few days earlier, he had been browsing some muggle stores with his boyfriend, who, upon entering the electronics section, immediately insisted they buy a Karaoke machine. Harry had calmly reasoned that Draco didn't even know what a Karaoke machine was. Draco had, a little less than calmly, explained that he wasn't a fucking idiot and was perfectly capable of reading boxes. Harry had quickly conceded.
Of course, he had endured just the tiniest bit of trepidation when Draco had suddenly started to show an intrest in muggle music. Still, Harry tried not to assume the worst. Until that fateful night where he had been unceremoniously shoved into his apartment to be greeted by a dozen beaming faces, half of which were already drunk. Granted, he had known that his friends were throwing a surprise party for him from day one.
After the initial cheers and drinks being shoved into his hands, he was lead to a chair to open presents. Hermione thrust a package at him eagerly. He rolled his eyes as he unwrapped the paper to reveal a red velvet corset with black lace and matching panties. Everyone laughed heartily and Harry, who was at that point too tipsy to worry about blushing, smirked up at her.
"I love it. But this doesn't mean you're getting a picture of me wearing it."
She petted him affectionately, "We'll see, darling."
Ron sidled up to him next, with a package that looked similar to Hermione's.
"You're not getting a naughty picture of me, either," he started before his best friend could say anything.
"Why not?" Ron whined, "we could make a fortune on Ebay!"
Harry happily gave him the finger as he tore the wrapping paper away. It was a Gameboy.
"Those things are amazing, Harry. Hermione gave me one for Christmas, remember? It's bizarre how you control the little pictures moving around!"
The warm, fuzzy feeling of being in the company of good friends and good alcohol was starting to set in. He hugged his two best friends in gratitude and proceded to open the rest of the presents, noting that it appeared Draco was saving his until last.
After awhile it seemed that Harry had finally conquered the pile of presents. Then he spotted Draco, over in the corner, fiddling with the Karaeoke machine. A knot of fear began to form in his stomach.
Draco cleared his throat as everyone turned to look at him, "Attention citizens: what you are about to witness may be unsuitable for small children, so could somebody please make sure Weasley covers his eyes? Now then, I believe the rest of you may need another drink, for good measure and to help this go down easier, " at this he looked at Harry, "You, Potter, may need two drinks, in rapid succession. Oh, and Happy Birthday."
And the music began to play. Harry groaned, but nobody could hear him over the bass. Draco, in a surprising display of vocal genius, began to sing.
"you let me violate you
you let me desecrate you
you let me penetrate you
you
let me complicate you
help me I broke apart my insides,
help
me I've got no soul to sell
help me the only thing that works
for me,
help me get away from myself,"
Harry almost wished he didn't know the words. Admittedly, Draco was looking quite hot in that dark green button-down shirt, and The Pants. Those incredibly tight leather pants that at that very moment were defying all laws of physics and slowly sauntering toward him.
"I
want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the
inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
my whole existence is
flawed
you get me closer to god"
Some people gasped. This seemed to encourage Draco as he approached Harry and sat on him in a rather unorthodox manner. Harry, who at present was being straddled by a very determined blond in leather pants, could only whimper. Draco pushed him by the shoulders further into the chair and continued, almost panting the lyrics now.
"you can have my isolation,
you
can have the hate that it brings
you can have my absence of faith,
you
can have my everything
help me tear down my reason,
help
me its' your sex I can smell
help me you make me perfect,
help me become somebody else"
Harry was catching fleeting glances of people in the background. Fred and George were howling with laughter. Ginny was smirking behind her hand. Hermione was dangerously close to drooling. Draco weaved his fingers into Harry's hair and pulled him close, their lips touching. He could feel the heat of the other man's breath and was in awe of the almost agonizing passionate fury in his eyes as he made for the chorus again.
"I
want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the
inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
my whole existence is
flawed
you get me closer to god"
Draco was slowly dragging his hands down Harry's body, his fingernails digging in just enough to cause shivers to erupt down his spine. When they hit their target, it was all Harry could do to keep from leaping out of the chair. Draco smirked as Harry's hips bucked, slightly, and he leaned down to bite his neck, singing into his ear.
"through
every forest, above the trees
within my stomach, scraped off my
knees
I drink the honey inside your hive
you are the reason I
stay alive"
All was quite for a moment, and then a loud cheer resounded through the apartment, though Harry barely heard it over the buzzing in his ears. Draco stood and obliged them all with a bow.
"Thank you, you're too kind. We're here all week! And now, if you all wouldn't mind diverting your attention elsewhere so that we can sneak off to play illicit games in the bedroom..."
Harry choked on the beer he had been chugging. Mercifully, Hermione had offered to make everyone mixed drinks in the kitchen. Draco grabbed a fistful of his shirt and dragged him into the bedroom.
As Harry landed on the bed a sudden thought occurred to him and he began to howl with laughter. Draco frowned.
"What's funny?"
"It's just, " Harry managed, through fits of hysterical glee, "how are you ever going to get those pants off?"
Draco rolled his eyes, "leave it to Potter to ruin the moment. Actually, I guess it would be the ideal time to explain the origin of the pants to you. I bought them from Snape."
Harry gagged, slightly, "Leave it to who to ruin the moment?"
Draco continued, ignoring him, "they're charmed so that only you can take them off."
"Why?" Harry asked, intrigued.
"Because they're your birthday present."
Harry's eyes became very wide, "you got me leather pants for my birthday?"
"No," Draco replied impatiently, "I got me leather pants for your birthday. They only work on me. I put them on, and Bam! Instant sex god! Not that I'm not one already, mind you, they just make the foreplay a great deal more interesting, as you have already witnessed."
"Wow," Harry breathed, "nice present. I mean- hot present, uh, thanks..."
Draco blinked as Harry babbled incoherently for a moment. Then, "what the hell are you waiting for? Take my pants off so I can-"
"Fuck me like an animal?"
"Precisely."
They exchanged wicked grins and went on to make an inconcievable amount of noise. The next day they would find out that neither of them had rememberd to put a silencing charm up. But, Harry figured, after having recieved a lap dance in front of his friends, having been overheard making lewd sex noises was nothing to get his red velvet panties all in a twist about.