Whispers. Lies. Hot breath next to his ear. Bitterness on his tongue. Memories. Fear. That traitorous voice inside his head. Heavy guilt crushing his chest. Madison.Sapphire eyes behind closed eyelids. The gentle thud as her body hits the ground. Shaking as he climbs out the window, apologies flowing from his lips. Body numb as he climbs up the building, collapsing on the roof with silent tears streaming down his face. He owes it to her to stay hidden, like she asked. He promised. The coldness sinks its hooks into his skin and does not let go. Small lumps of rocks dig into his back, sharp and painful. Grief still weighs down his heart and hopelessness clings to his bones. (I will never go away).He felt pathetic. (You are.).Can't breathe. Something is pressing down on his chest so that no oxygen (She was your oxygen.)gets to his lungs. Clenching his eyes shut. Force the whirlwind of emotions down and lock it up. Calm down. Thumb pressing into his wound, fingernail cutting the tender skin. Blood spills down his wrist and drips onto the floor beneath him. Red stains white - blood and innocence.
She is dead. (Your fault. Yours...).Taking a deep breath. Holding it in until his chest hurt. She died because she loved him, a coward who lies and runs from everything. Like he was doing now, pulling himself up in a daze and stumbling towards the metal door. Not caring about the blood on the roof; not caring about the red stains on his shirt; and not caring about the tear tracks on his face.
Asriel.He stops dead in his tracks, unmoving. I know you can hear me.Start running. (Why not give up?).Don't panic. (Panic…).Wrench open the door and half stumble down the stairs, blood still trickling down his wrist. Bumping into walls and staggering down the hallways. Murderer.No. (That's not true and you know it.).Get out. I will always find you.Out! Please! Get out, (No.), go away… Coward. You don't deserve her.
Grip the railings tight, squeezing with all his strength. Pain. He is rushing through the doors and sprinting away. No one pays him attention. (And they won't until it's too late. That's how you win affection).His back is against the wall of a random alleyway and he is panting hard. He easily blends in with the darkness around him until he is merely a shadow in the background. Dizziness. With ears ringing and eyes distant (Stay with me)he slid into a crumpled heap on the ground. You will pay.On his knees with hair in his face (Black like the Darkness, like the Night)and gunpowder lit within his veins he tasted poison on his lips as the ground rushes up to meet him the final time.
You killed her.
(Never wake up…)