Disclaimer: I don't own nothing. Believe me, if I did, I wouldn't be here makin stories, I'd be selling them.

Notice: I have bad spelling and grammer. If I am pressed for time, then … well lets just say that you will be able to tell if I was.i will try to catch my own mistakes, but I am only a sad excuse for a human. That being said, if you don't like my views, tough luck. I am athiest. If I had to lean to any religion of my own it would be satanism or something cause I dislike my own species. I will try to think of what random religions think and enter it into my stories. Also, if I am starting to sound smart in any given expenation, then I am either making shit up, or it's a theory that I have. So bear with me.

Summery: this will be of random scenes in no specific order in which you don't see too, often if at all.

Signed, VR.

"speak"

'think'

"inner speak/speak with some kind of demonic voicejutsu"

'… see previos only instead of speak, it is think'

Seriosly people, I hope this is not the first fanfic you have ever read, if so read somehing else because people reading my story should not need the guide. This is the basic stuff.

Show time!

666

Team 7 has been waiting for Kakashi to get to their traing ground for the last two hours. It has been three weeks since they started doing missions daily because they don't have a social life. So they would meet at training field 7 at 8 am, wait for three hours for their sensei to show, do chores for the next two hours until one pm, lunch (need I say more?), more missions from 2pm to 5pm, go home, sleep, repeat. It was around now that naruto was wandering 'why do I even bother showing up on time if Kakashi-sensei doesn't? shouldn't I just get here like five minutes before him so his lame excuss isnt so bad from waiting?'

An hour later, Kakashi arrives.

"YOUR LATE!!!!!" rang through out the clearing by two diifferent people. They paused in their yelling to see if he had a good excuse this time.

"Mah, sorry, I got lost in a good book of porn."

Cue face fault.

666

It was the day before the acadamy exams and naruto walked into the acadamy in high spirits.

'maybe today Sakura-chan will finaly go out with me!' thought the naïve fool. But it was not to be. Sakura was still on her period.

"hey Sakura-chan! Will you go out wi-" he was cut off.

"NO! I HAVE HAD IT WITH YOU ASKING ME OUT! WHY WONT YOU GO TAKE A HINT? WHY DO YOU THINK I KEEP ASKING SASUKE-KUN OUT? FOR MY HEALTH? I FUCKING HATE YOU! YOU ARE ALWAYS IN THE WAY! LEAVE ME ALONE!" screamed Sakura.

Naruto was heartbroken … for a second. "FINE, I DIDN'T WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU ANYWAYS YOU SCAMP! IT WAS ALWAYS A JOKE YOU LITTLE BLOODLINE BITCH. I BET SCREWED ALL THE OTHER GUYS WITH BLOODLINES ALREADY AND THE ONLY REASON YOU WANT SASUKE-TEME IS SO YOU CAN COMPLETE YOUR STD COLLECTION. IM GONNA GO WITH HINATA AND MAKE LIKE BUNNIES." Yelled naruto before grabing hinata and going into the teachers lounge.

666

Kakashi had another meeting with the other jounins. This time to talk about the chunin-exams.

"I Yuhi Kurenai nominate team 8 for the chunin selection exams." Stated Kurenai.

"I Sarutobi Asuma nominate team 10 for the chunin selection exams" stated Asuma.

"I Hatake Kakashi … nominate tea-" Kakashi was cut off as Naruto bursts in, without realising they arent alone, and says the following.

"Kakashi-sensei, I just found an easy way to remember your name. I broke your name down and it sounds like "cock-ass-he". Pretty cool huh?"

Everyoone stares at naruto. "Did I interupt something?" asked Naruto.

666

'Sasuke-teme has been a jerk ever since I can remember, well I finaly have a chance to do payback. Tenfold.'thought naruto on the day of the first task of the chunin exams. After getting dressed and ready for the day, naruto left his apartment for the test center which just so happened to be the acadamy.

(room, genjutsu and fight happens the same, I just too lasy.)

"glad you all could make it, if one of you didn't come, than you would be turned away." said Kakashi.

They went in to a room full of glares. Teams 8, 10, Gai, and everybody else have already gone in. team 7 was the last to enter. Ino was on her way to glomp Sasuke when naruto shouted bringing the entire rooms attention too team 7. " MY NAME IS UZUMAKI NARUTO, NEXT HOKAGE, AND IM GONNA BEAT EVERY ONE OF YOU. BUT RIGHT NOW I AM THE NUMBER ONE PRANK MASTER IN KONOHA. HERE IS MY BEST PRANK EVER."

After that was said, naruto ran behind Sasuke making everyone stare at him allowing them to think he chickened out and is hiding. When all of a sudden, naruto pantsed Sasuke in front of all the chunin hopefulls and only one thing was running through Sasukes mind when he felt that sudden breaze. 'shit, I knew today was the worst posible day to try going commando.'

666

After the inari incedent Naruto left the house to train but fell asleep in a clearing. Haku had just finished gathering half of he herbs he needed when he saw a bird. It flew over and landed on an orange hill. 'wait, orange?' thought haku realizing that since hills arent orange, then it most be that shinobi. He woke the shinobi up.

Naruto woke up to see a pretty girl standing in fron of him. (skip conversation) after helping out the girl, she started to leave before calling out "by the way, im a boy."

Haku loved doing that to people but was caught off guard by what happened next.

"EW. You're a guy? What are you? A crossdresser? "

"No."

"I bet your gay but since you couldn't find any other gay people too hook up with you started cross dressing so guys could look at you or think perverted thoughts."

'what do I say to that? It a lie, but it would make sense if I saw somebody else doing it' thought haku.

"That's weird, later you fairy." And Naruto left.

Haku left the clearing thinking '… that is the last time I dress up like a girl.'

666

So, did you like it? Please review. Comments and concerns will be dully noted and, for the most part, ignored. This is my first fanfic although it realy cant be considered one. I never understood why, at the bottom, authers put RR. Which stands for read and review. But logicaly, if they put it at te bottom, then most people have already read it. So why put the red part in and not just the review? Must be some tradition I don't know about. But whatever, as I always say, (and I made up this saying by the way. So no stealing.) whichever way the wind blows your swing. R&R. finished at 6:33 am 3/6/08.

Vampire Retribution.