Author's Note – Although I'm not a member of the Smart Groups list, I saw the challenge posted up here at I've followed the guidelines outlined in other stories to respond to that, but mainly just because of the challenge of doing such a restricted story while still getting across a message that isn't commonly found in Hogan's Heroes fan fiction.
This story references 'The Crittendon Plan' but could take place at any time before or after the episode itself. A few words have been altered to make it a true triple threat story. Three characters have speaking parts. Crittendon is referenced heavily.
I actually really liked the Crittendon character and felt he wasn't given enough credit. So this is my answer to that. The length is exactly three hundred words.
"Anything interesting?" the officer asked, pausing beside one of the men.
"Another coded letter from that crazy bloke about the geraniums," the soldier reported, fishing the envelope out of the stack beside him. "Any special instructions?"
The officer sighed, holding his hand out for the letter. Crittendon was the reason he was at this tedious posting. "I'll take it," he said. "I'll make sure it gets upstairs."
"Can't you leave it here a while, Wing Commander?" the soldier asked. "These always make for a bloody good laugh, sir."
"I said I'll take it," he repeated firmly, taking the letter from the young soldier. "It's an official communication."
"Officers must get a bigger mail allowance," a neighbouring soldier commented. "Me brother's in a camp and hardly gets to send any letters out. It's not fair. We enlisted have families too."
"Back to work," the officer ordered, walking up to his desk at the front of the room. He waited until the soldiers were back at their work, then slid the letter into his pocket. The enlisted weren't the only ones who laughed at the letters; the officers upstairs enjoyed them just as much.
But the officer never let them get upstairs. Crittendon might be the reason he was at this post. But Crittendon was also the reason that he was still alive. And he'd take a tedious posting and a permanent limp over death any day.
Besides, the officer knew two important things.
He knew that his former CO wasn't just an eccentric gardener who'd gone more than a little stir crazy. Crittendon honestly believed the geraniums would help boost morale. And the letters were his way of trying to help the war effort from behind barbed wire.
And he knew something else.
Officers weren't allowed to send any extra mail.