My first Gone fanfiction! And also first non- D. Gray-Man one.
Disclaimers: I do not own Gone (Michael Grant does) or Viva la Vida (Coldplay does). And the 51 things format probably first appeared in Twilight, although I didn't read them. Sad how I don't own a lot of things here. But guess what guys, Caine Soren is MINE, ALL MINE. And so is Sam Temple. :) *Plague spoilers* Caine OOC
Sam and Diana's POV~
Caine is not allowed to steal Diana's clothes.
He should also stop trying to kill Sam.
It's getting on his nerves
and causing a lot of property damage.
Caine is not allowed to eat Panda,
because that's cannibalism,
nor is he allowed to eat real pandas
because they are cute and cuddly and endangered
but that's a different story.
Caine is not allowed to throw people at walls,
throw walls at people,
throw people at other heavy objects,
or throw other heavy objects at people.
On second thought, he is not allowed to throw things in general
with the exception of those huge bugs and Drake.
In fact, he is very welcome to throw the two mentioned above.
Although it is suggested that he doesn't smash a bunch of buildings in the process.
Caine is not allowed to say "Hungry in the dark" while sleeping
or doing other things in bed
because it's really getting on Diana's nerves
especially during the "other things."
Which reminds me, he is strongly advised to wear protection
and NOT make Diana pregnant.
Although it's too late for that.
He is not allowed to pretend to be Napoleon
and talk with a horrible French accent.
Caine is not allowed to sing in the shower
especially his altered version of Viva la Vida
(where he starts with "I soon will rule the world")
because he gets excited and starts to throw things.
Diana would like to remind him that her lavender bath salts are not in his way of world domination.
He is not allowed to sing anything else anywhere else either.
He is also not allowed to practice his evil king-of-the-world laugh.
Caine is not allowed to wear his school uniform for more than four days in a row.
He is not allowed to get drunk and rant about fearless leadership
in a terrible French accent.
Caine is not allowed to complain that Sam has better abs than him.
He is not allowed to sneak into Sam's territory
which forces him to wake up from his beauty sleep to fight with Caine.
He is not allowed to kidnap Astrid if he wins the fight
and must not steal Sam's clothes in the process.
Caine is not allowed to make out with random girls.
He is not allowed to succumb to the Darkness's voice
and randomly throw things
and possibly kill them all.
Caine is not allowed to steal Nutella
because Sam needs it to bribe people to stay on his side
which means the two of them will fight if Caine is caught
and cause a lot of property damage.
And besides, Sam really likes Nutella.
"Done!" Sam high-fived Diana. "Fearless Leader, you can see the list now."
Caine snatched it from his girlfriend and brother, with a look of contempt as he read it. Then his face lit up.
"OHMYGAWD SAM! I'M A FATHER! YESSSSSSSSS!" Caine did his evil laugh and swept Sam into a crushing hug. Then he started dancing and singing Viva la Vida while still hugging his confused rival.
Diana picked up the pen once again.
Caine is not allowed to suddenly hug his worst enemies out of excitement of having gotten Diana pregnant.
Okay, I seriously doubt Caine says "Hungry in the dark" during sex. Or that he sings in the shower. But it's fun to imagine that he does.
Reviewers get free Nutella and my love
~Frostyshadows~