Story written for the Fanfiction Challenge on The Looking Glass Forum. Trinity's black magic stolen unapologetically from Sydney Andrews. (And while we're on the subject of stuff from UC and TLE...) Also, keep in mind that I just wrote this and didn't edit it, so... A little leeway, please?
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Curse
By ZionAngel
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Ghost's attention shifted away from his discussion with Colt when a movement beyond him caught his eye. He found Trinity at the other end of the hallway, half hidden by a doorway and beckoning him inside. He stayed with Colt a few seconds more, letting their business wrap itself up, and went to her. She retreated a few steps back into the room, giving him leeway to enter, and motioned for him to shut the door behind him, lest anyone should walk by and hear their conversation.
"Trinity?" Her eyes were tired, despairing. Even afraid, and that terrified him, coming from her. "What is it?"
She terrified him further when she swallowed a lump from her throat, looked down, and said in a quiet voice, "I'm going with Neo."
He said nothing, only stood there in a dead silence, waiting for several moments for Trinity to tell him her news, before realizing that the words he heard had come from her lips, not his mind. Once that fact hit him, really hit him, everything in him shattered, and fell in pieces to the floor around him. "Why?" It was a suicide mission, whether they ever made it to Zero-One or not. None of them yet knew if the world would still be turning in the morning. "We need you here." But if it did keep on going, he didn't want to live to see it if she wasn't there to see it with him. "You can't go." He loved her, he couldn't bear to loose her. "You have to stay with us." It was hard enough, to love her with every fiber of his being and yet be forbidden to be with her, damned to be nothing but a friend to her. But to wake up every morning, knowing he could not at least have that sisterly love, would never have it again...
"You'll make it without me," she whispered, eyes closed and head turned downwards, as if she was praying that her words would become truth. "I have to go. He's going to need my help. And besides... I belong with him, not with you."
It was the irony of those words that hurt him most, more than their literal truth. He tried to think of something, anything, if he could just drag his mind out of this thick fog of pain and fear - of some way to keep her here, convince her to stay, or even, if he was forced, some complex and unbreakable knot he could use to tie her up here and take her back to Zion, where she would be safe with him. But he couldn't concentrate on anything else.
Finally Trinity lifted her head, and slowly, very slowly, opened her eyes to him. Maybe she hadn't been praying after all. Maybe she had cast a spell on him, with a bit of that Black Magic she was so widely rumored to possess, that he saw in her every time she put her life on the line for the world, an ungrateful world who would never know, never appreciate all she had done for them. Perhaps she bound him into silence, so he could not keep her from her duty... or her heart. "Ghost, I need you to do something for me."
I don't care, I don't want to hear it! He still could not comprehend anything, and he felt his mind shutting down, blocking out everything. This couldn't happen, it couldn't possibly - "What?" The last thing he wanted was to help her leave, but he loved her too much to deny her.
She pursed her lips together, gently biting down, and stared off into one of the dusty corners of the room. Ghost slowly realized that she had not actually looked into his eyes since he entered this claustrophobic room. Perhaps this was not so easy for her as he thought. Perhaps Trinity loved him more than he realized. "I... Morpheus... and Niobe..." She shrugged, just a tiny movement of her shoulders as she hugged herself tightly. " I can't do it. I thought I'd be able to but I just can't."
He knew better than to succumb to the urge to hug her himself. "What? What can't you do?"
"I can't say goodbye." She was retreating further and further into herself, into the protective shield she had cultivated little by little over the course of the last thirty-one years. It was so much worse, knowing how long it had been since she had needed it. "I can't talk to them now. Can't..." Her head swung from side to side, slow and methodical.
She was breaking his heart. He couldn't remember a time when she made him hurt more than he did now, seeing her strength succumb to this, after so many years of battling her way through every hardship and coming out better for it. The few people she kept close to her heart meant everything to her, the only things she really cared about in this world. They were her only weakness.
She took a deep, shuddering breath, and spoke with only a bit more strength than she had possessed a moment ago. "I need you to tell them, both of them... that I love them, very much, and that I'm..." She sighed, heavily, fighting to hold her control and composure. "...so grateful for everything they've done for me, and... I'm sorry I had to leave like this, but... I had to."
Anyone else, any other man, woman or child in the world would be wiping a stream of tears from their face by now. But Trinity - Thank God - remained Trinity, lifting her head to look at him. She bore that quintessential faith and love in her eyes, that spirit that kept her going. That spirit that made him fall in love with her, the very moment he saw her - and he would swear his life on that, even though he always professed that there was no such thing as love at first sight - fifteen long years ago.
Ghost was aware - vaguely, but enough to comprehend - of what he was doing when he took two short steps forward, wrapped his arms around her waist, and pulled her close enough for their whole bodies to touch when he kissed her. He never bothered to try and stop himself, and loved her even more when she did not stop him either. He just could not take it anymore. Endless years of one-sided love, and now the prospect of being forced to face the new world without her... He would never again be given the opportunity to tell her. "I love you, Trinity," he sighed, pulling away and resting his forehead against hers.
"Yeah," she murmured quietly, a sad smile on her lips. "Kinda figured." She shifted her arms to wrap them around him tightly. "I love you too, Ghost." And she really meant that.
But she didn't let him stay with her very long, and soon pulled away a few steps. She slipped a lock of stray hair behind her ear before she would look at him again. "Please tell them, Ghost, please. Tomorrow, when this is all over. Tell them, for me."
He nodded slowly. He felt as though she had used a bit more of that Black Magic to give him a tiny piece of herself, just enough of her courage and resolve to see him through. "I will." Trinity smiled peacefully, hugging him once more. She let him kiss her a second time, more gentle than the first.
But then she pulled away, opened the door, and left him alone in the darkened room.
As he stood there, the deep sense of loneliness seeping into his body and heart, it slowly dawned on him just what he had been asked, and more importantly, who was asking. Trinity was the strongest, most resilient, most powerful human being he had ever known. Her faith, too, was stronger than anything he could have ever imagined or believed, had he not seen it for himself. All she had to do was believe, to bless her own future with that Black Magic, and it would come true. She needed only to tell herself that she would return, victorious, from Zero-One, and in a few days' time she would return to a Zion that knew peace for the very first time, return to him. If she came back, she could tell Morpheus and Niobe these things herself, and she wouldn't need his help. But she did need his help, she had cursed herself - or maybe just accepted reality - by asking for it. As soon as she stepped off of the Mjolnir and into the Logos, he would never see her again.
