They were dead, they had died after a long struggle for life, and because of that, he wasn't angry. He didn't mind, that they have left him alone, alone, with his younger brother. The eleven years old child still didn't understand, what he mend, when he said that they were gone. He had been very sad to see his brothers smile , when he asked, when they would be back. And he couldn't bring it over his heart to say never. Instead he lied. He said that they are going to come back. But he never said when...
Life in the Beilschmidt-Family became hard after their parents died. Gilbert did everything to keep a daily routine for young Ludwig, but sometimes failed miserably. He worked hard, did everything for his school, but...
Life was unfair and because of the accident, their house was gone. And nearly everything else they possessed. But luckily he had found a apartment for them to stay. A small one-room flat, nothing to compare with their old house, but better than nothing. And it was near school, so, well, he didn't had to pay any more for Ludwig's bus tickets. Gilbert was now eighteen. He had to wait three years, before he could inherit the wealth of their parents. He had been so stupid... Thinking about the reason his parents changed their testament, he could beat up himself. It was all his fault.
It was his fault, that they sometimes didn't had enough money to pay the bills.
It was his fault, that his little brother didn't had a room for him alone.
It was his fault, that they had to think twice before buying something.
And it was his fault, that his brother had to stop his hobby to play soccer in the club.
Damn. And only he had been a rebel and his parents though to pay back by giving him the money when he was 21. He didn't took the threat serious. Normally parents won't disappear before the youngest was eighteen.
But his has to be strong, especially for little Ludwig.
Said boy was now sitting at his desk, writing something in his neat writing. Probably homework, but Gilbert was too tired. He had worked all night, went to his school, picked up his brother and went home. Not to forget that he fell onto the couch after arriving at home.
"Bruder, I'm finish. Can I go to Feli?"
Feli... Felicia.
That girl. For Gilbert, Feli-chan's parents were too good to them. Sometimes, he got Ludwig and that Italian girl and brought them directly to the brunette's home. There Ludwig would get an good meal, and sometimes they even let him sleep there.
He didn't though of his brother as a burden, but sometimes it was good that he didn't saw his older brother come home late, well sometimes he didn't even came home, and be totally exhausted. On those days Gilbert sometimes lost control over his emotions and cried.
Cried, because he couldn't give Ludwig everything he wanted, because it was unfair that he had so much time with them, although he was the bad child, and Ludwig only eleven years.
"Ja, you can. Viel Spaß!" he tried to answer as cheerful as possible.
He knew, that Ludwig didn't deserved all what happened. He knew that his little brother shouldn't lie on an old bed with very thin sheets that were cold at night. He knew that Ludwig didn't need to see his brother being worn out and fall onto the couch, with black shadows under his eyes. He didn't need to know that although he was full, that the older hadn't eaten anything just to give it to him.
Gilbert did nearly everything to make Ludwig's life as comfortable as possible. And Feli helped him with that, even if the Italian didn't knew.
The door fell close, and Ludwig was gone. He would phone if he stayed over night, so Gilbert closed his eyes again, just to get a small nap before doing his homework.
Only one year, then he would be finish with school and he would be able to look for a real job. And if he was 21, he would study. Everything was planned inside his head. From today to his 21st birthday.
The breath of the platinum-haired went slow. He was sleeping. But even in his dreams, the day haunted him...
"Schön! Then I'll leave!" he screamed at his mother, throwing the glass a the floor.
The woman had long silver hair, just like her son, but bright blue eyes. She seemed to be shocked by his outburst.
"You brat! Why did I gave birth to you? If I knew what would happened, I would have aborted you!" she cried, searching comfort at her husband, who was standing behind her and wrapped his arms around her.
"You know what? FUCK YOU!" the teen finally screamed and left the kitchen, leaving his mother crying and his father glaring daggers at him. When he ran up to pack his things, ha saw an frightened blond boy.
"Bruder?" he asked with tears in his eyes.
That wasn't his ambition. He didn't want his brother to cry because of his fights with them.
"Nothing. Don't worry, I'll be back in the evening." he said with concern and patted the hair of the younger one. This brought back a small smile on the others lips, and Gilbert had to grin too.
After that, he went into his room, grabbed his keys, wallet and phone and left. On his way to the front door he called his buddy Francis.
"Hey, Frenchy! Wanna hang out a bit.?"
He went over to his car, and opened the door.
"Sure. But I can't drink. License is in danger, y'know? No problem, will be there in a sec."
Shortly he raised his middle-finger toward the kitchen window and drove off.
Later that evening he was shocked to see the fire-fighters and the ambulance in front of their house. There was smoke, people with uniforms running around and some other random people. He parked at the near and ran towards the action. When he saw the rest, of what he had called home, he ran to the officers who were talking to the neighbours. One pointed at him, and the officer walked, notebook in his hand, to the trembling teen.
"Wha- What happened?" he stuttered.
"Gilbert Beilschmidt?" he asked without emotion.
"Ja, w-wo ist mein Bruder?"
The officer didn't understand his German ramblings, but Gilbert was too shocked to actually notice that.
"Sir, please calm down, everything will be explained."
He stopped panicking for an moment, before grabbing the officer.
"WHAT HAPPENED! I WANT TO SEE MY BROTHER! WHERE MY PARENTS?" he screamed.
The other man pointed at the ambulance, and Gilbert ran, without answering.
He watched into the car and saw his brother, unconscious and wounds on little arms.
Gilbert woke up panting. The memory too hard for him, he raised from the couch and went into the kitchen. Gulping down a glass of water he noticed his phone.
"A text from west." he muttered, picking up the device.
~I'm sleeping at Feli today. I didn't wanted to phone, because I could have woken you up.~
He sighed. At least his brother had gotten something to eat. He knew, that inside the fridge was nothing. He had to go to the store again. But he still hadn't gotten his check. Today was Friday. So there was no school tomorrow. But work.
Gilbert worked as a waiter in a good restaurant. He always got his money on time, and would he have been alone, it would have been also enough, but they were two.
He chewed on his lip. Three more years. Then Ludwig won't have to suffer any more.
With a glance at his watch he saw that it was 6 pm. Time to get ready for work. He quickly took a shower, brushed his teeth and changed his clothed. An 6.30 pm. he was ready and went off.
"Ve~ Ludwig, I hoped you like your food!" the Italian girl happily chirped when they walked up to his room.
The blonde only nodded, but for the brunette he was too quiet.
"Ve~ what is wrong?"
He only shook his head and sighed.
"It' about Gilbert. I don't know how to help him." he said quiet.
For a moment Felicia stopped in his movement.
"Why? Always when I see him he's happy!"
There was no point in talking to Feli. She didn't understand their situation. Nobody did.
"Drop it. Maybe it'll will go away by alone."
Then Feli grinned. Something must have come into his mind.
"Ludwig, you wanna come tomorrow to my game? It will be fun and I want you to watch it!" he chirped.
Sadly, Ludwig nodded. He hated it to watch someone play soccer, since he had to stop. Of course, sometimes he played with his brother, but it wasn't the same.
"Sure, why not."
It was four o'clock when Gilbert arrived at home. He felt exhausted. His back hurt and it was heavy for him to keep open his eyes. With a glance at his cellphone he saw an missed call. From Francis.
If he would call back, Francis would be drunk or having sex at the moment, so fuck it.
Instead he searched for his keys and opened the door. He yawned and every movement pained him.
With a soft click the lights went on and he was happy to see the couch. He stumbled a few steps before falling on it, not caring that he should take a shower or change his clothes. He was so tired, not caring for anything.
"Sleep, I want sleep!" he groaned while he hit another light switch.
"So, Beilschmidt is the name, huh?" the man who maybe was going to rent them the apartment frowned.
Gilbert nodded. He needed something to sleep in for him and his brother.
"You have no job, are a student, and have no parents who would pay for you if you don't can, why should I rent you my apartment?"
Fuck. Why did it always ended like this. He didn't want to give his brother into a orphanage, so he just said the truth.
"I don't want the government to take my brother away. Isn't that a answer enough?"
He frowned again and looked through the papers. The boy was only eighteen and desperate.
"Fine, fine. I don't really care why, but if you pay late, I'll throw you out!"
Three months later...
The phone rang, and little Ludwig answered.
"Beilschmidt?"
"Here the owner of your damn apartment, gimme your brother!"
Even before Ludwig could called for the older, he stood next to him.
The younger handed him the phone ant waited.
"I know, I'm late. I'll pay you when I have the money." Gilbert said quiet.
"Good. That better be in the next three days, or else..."
"I know, you'll throw me out."
Gilbert awoke from the sound of an unlocking door. Inside the frame stood an wet Ludwig.
"What happened to you?" he asked, noticing the state of the younger.
"It rained when after Feli finished her game. I walked home." the younger explained calm. It was already 5 pm.
He had been sad, that Gilbert didn't answered the phone, but he thought again after anger nearly swelled up. Maybe Gilbert had been working late and was tired. Or he was still working. And the younger understood. He understood their situation.
"Why didn't you called?"
He could hear the exhaustion in his brother's voice. He nearly did everything to make things easier. He always was quiet when Gilbert slept, he never was mad at him when he wasn't able to buy something or when he had to walk home, he always did his chorus.
"I did."
For Ludwig, it was a simple answer, for Gilbert it broke again his heart.
He rose from the couch and moved over to the younger and hugged him from behind.
"I'm sorry."
He bend down to the younger, now facing him an
He didn't cared that he was getting wet, the only thought in his head was, what for bad brother he was.
"Don't mind. I know you're tired. And I can say that you still are. Better sleep a bit."
Gilbert but his lip. In those six months, Ludwig a matured too much. He wasn't any more a happy child, he had become to an small adult, who had lived nearly through all bad things that could happen.
"I'll make it up to you, promise?" he held up his little finger.
"Pinky swear" he grinned.
Ludwig smiled, and brought up his finger too.
"Pinky swear." he said happily.
Gilbert's eyes watched the hand of the younger. There were scars, from the fire and suddenly the older felt sick. He knew, Ludwig still had scars on his arms, although they had faded a bit. He looked up again and smiled a sad smile. Ludwig grinned too, before falling into Gilbert's arms. He hugged him in an bone crushing ways
"I'm so happy to have you!" exclaimed the younger.
"Me too, me too. And together we'll survive, ne?"
"Ja."
Two weeks later was Ludwig's birthday. Gilbert frowned on his way home. First, it was Ludwig first birthday after their parents have passed away, second, what should he buy him.
He had a little money saved up for the little one, but giving him some money won't do it. He drove through the shopping district, hoping that the shops would give him an idea. But he got no inspiration. But then he passed it. The shop, the thing he would buy... Yes, that was a idea!
Ludwig smiled when Feli gave him the badly wrapped gift. He opened it carefully, not wanting to rip the paper and grinned. It was a book, but not only a simple book. It was a book about how to educate a dog.
"But Feli, I don't have a dog!" he laughed.
"Yeah, I know, but I know you like dogs. Maybe your brother will buy you one if you ask him!" Feli chirped.
She didn't noticed, how Ludwig's expression saddened.
"I don't think he will, he don't like animals." he lied.
Even Feli saw their situation, he didn't liked to admit it. He wasn't ashamed, but...
It was hard for him to tell: He won't, dogs cost money and we don't have any since our parents died!
He had lied to Feli from the beginning. He told them that they were travelling around the world, and Gilbert didn't want to take care for the house. And luckily, Felicia was stupid enough to belive.
"Maybe, maybe not. But well. Fratello is waiting for me. I have to go. See you, and Happy birthday!"
The tanned girl ran off and left Ludwig alone. He stood there, waiting for his brother to pick him up, but he didn't came. Frowning he dialled his brother's number, only to hear the voice mail.
He let his head sink. Again his brother forgot him. But at least it wasn't raining. He walked down the streets and while he was thinking, memories from before came into his mind.
Ludwig loved to be with his mother. Always, when they visited her sister, he could play with the dogs, while Gilbert was killing Roderich. He loved the canines, their fur really smelled good if you took care of them. His aunt had one German Sheppard. Ludwig loved to play with the dog. It always pushed his wet nose into his cheek and licked his face, leaving and disgusting trail of saliva, but the blonde didn't mind. He loved dogs.
But thinking about his aunt, why didn't she took them? He knew that she hated Gilbert, but did she really hated him so? He shook off his aunt from his mind and continued walking.
Gilbert was warned when he heard keys. This was going to be the best surprise for Ludwig, the beast only had to hold still.
The younger entered the apartment and froze. In the only room stood Gilbert, holding a puppy to his chest and grinned.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" he shouted and handed him the pup.
Ludwig first thought that it was a stuffed toy, but when it yelped and moved he realised, it was real. A real small dog. And it licked his face.
He watched the animal, then his brother and felt his eyes watered.
"Bu-but Bruder! I-I don't..." he didn't find the right words.
"You don't want him? Okay, then he's mine!" he snatched in a playful way the dog from him and fell backwards on the couch.
"Hmm, what to name you? Ludwig, help me! I don't know how to name my dog!" he laughed and let the puppy on the floor.
"Gil!"
As soon the dog left his hands his brother was lying on him, crying.
"You didn't had to! I mean the money! And-and..."
He stroke the blonde hair and hugged him.
"I don't care. It was some money I saved up for you. Come on, name him!"
The blonde looked up from his brother's chest, only to see that Gilbert had also brought an dog-bed and two bowls for water and food.
"Berlitz" the younger murmured.
"What, I didn't hear you!"
"BERLITZ!"
And both burst out laughing. It was the first time they laughed like that, after their parents died, and for Gilbert at was the best moment in his whole life.
"Damn, I knew I am awesome!" he grinned, only to hear Ludwig stop.
He watched his brother, but suddenly he cried again, and not only some wailing, he really cried.
"What, did I say something wrong?" he was afraid that something was wrong.
But Ludwig shook his head.
"Since Mutti and Vati died, you never said the you were awesome. And, I want them back!"
He held his younger brother a hard as he could, hoping that his tears wouldn't start falling to. It was right. Since their death, he didn't even thought of that word. And now... It was like before. The brothers were laughing and Gilbert praised himself.
He held the younger tighter, and tried to calm him.
"I know, me too." he whispered.
Years later...
Gilbert Beilschmidt couldn't have been happier. Today, well, today was Luswig's graduation and he couldn't have been prouder. Seven years. Sevens years have passed since that faithful day, and still. They had managed to live the first three years and after that they had gotten the money. And after that, live became easy again. But, well.
Ludwig was now eighteen, a nearly full grown man and not more the cute child he used to be. He had just gotten his graduation as a full straight A-student, and he already gotten the response from the university. He wanted to study history and politics, and not like his older brother economy. Yeah, one years after that day Gilbert went to university and studied economy to get a better job. It became harder after that, but two years later the lawyer gave them the papers.
He was now a full grown business man, but when he was with his brother he let out his goofy site. Like now.
Ludwig slowly moved to him, Feli right behind him.
"I knew I was awesome enough to raise you right!"
He smacked his brother on the back, earning an glare from the blond.
"Stop being an idiot!"
"Stop being an stick in the mud!"
They both got a laugh from Felicia now not more Ludwig's best friend, but lover. She sneaked up her hand to Ludwig's just to hold his and gave him an kiss on the cheek.
"Ve~ Ludwig. Be a little nicer to your brother." she laughed, earning an angered look from the blond.
"Kesese, even your girlfriend thinks your to harsh with me! Come, let's go for a drink and celebrate you!"
They walked to the car, and directly Ludwig had to grin when he saw the dog. They had three now, Berlitz, Blackie and Aster, and all three were wiggeling their tails.
So many things had changed, but all to the positive. Gilbert had a great job, Ludwig a great graduations and a beautiful girlfriend. The only thing they missed was a girl for Gilbert.
"Gilbert, I want to visit our parents before going out, 'kay?"
"Sure bruder, I'm sure they'll be proud."
And Feli gave him a kiss.