Fiona could feel her hand shaking, her grip on the cheap wine bottle loose, and she feared she might drop it. She sat it down on her coffee table, loudly, and stared at it. She watched it, and waited for it to tell her what to do. Then she realized it wasn't going to give her answers. Where are my flashcards? Thrown away, no doubt. Three months sober means you can work through this on your own, she thought. But that's why I'm miserable.

She ran off a list in her head, wringing her hands and keeping them busy so she wouldn't reach for the bottle. She thought about turning on the TV, but that was stupid. She could call her mother, or her therapist... Not Holly J. Definitely not Holly J. But her mother and her therapist wouldn't be there for her. It wouldn't be the same. She wasn't upset because she wanted to drink. Hell, she didn't even really want to. She was just alone. Back to square one, back to how she felt when she first moved in to this wonderful condo; absolutely alone.

Pulling her phone out of her pocket, she sighed. She was at a stand-still until she decided or couldn't decide. Until something miraculous happened, she was stagnant. She scrolled through her contacts, and stumbled upon one; Eli Goldsworthy. Her "only friend at Degrassi." Shouldn't it make sense that she could call him? It was only a little after eight, of course she could. She called.

"Fiona?"

She cleared her throat, trying to disguise her voice. "Hey, Eli."

"Hey." He sounded distant, unfocused.

"Would you like to..." She sighed. "Will you come over? Please?"

There was a pause. He was thinking. She crossed her fingers. "Do you need me?"

"Yes!" she whined, leaning forward. "Please, Eli?"

"Of course," he said without hesitation. "I'll be there soon."

Fiona ended the call with a small smile on her face. Oh, Eli. The strange little goth boy who had more problems than Fiona had outfits. Suddenly she remembered the bottle on the table, which obviously had to be hidden. He couldn't know that she was so close to falling apart again. No, he was simply going to be her shoulder to cry on, minus messy details. She grabbed it and decided to hide it under the sink in the kitchen. She went into her bedroom, thinking it might be a good idea to change into something more casual, and eventually ended up putting on the simplest things she owned; a soft, relaxed pair of cropped blue pants, a cozy purple shirt with some graphic print, and her slippers. She even decided to put her hair up into a messy bun. She didn't see the need to dress up for Eli, she wasn't trying to impress him. She sat down on her bed and took some deep breaths before she heard the bell. He's here, she thought, panicking for only a moment. She rushed to the door to let him in, opening it slowly.

Eli stood awkwardly, one hand behind his head. He wore simple clothes; simple skinny jeans, a simple black shirt, and his hair was simply messy. He had rushed over, worried about Fiona 'needing' him to come. He considered that she may have relapsed and been drinking again, or that she had suffered some sort of fallout in a friendship, or had some problem with Charlie, her ex girlfriend. Either way, he was worried about her. Fiona smiled and motioned for him to come in. She led him to the couch and allowed him to sit first. She stood in front of him, wondering how much he actually wanted to be there. "Thank you so much for coming, Eli... Are you thirsty or something?"

He shook his head and returned her smile. "No, thanks. Are you okay?"

Fiona sat down beside him, half tempted to lean onto his shoulder and sob, but she maintained her composure for now. She didn't want to completely fall apart, she didn't want to tell him anything, and she certainly didn't want him to knew she was collapsing, relapsing, breaking down. But He seemed worried. The way his eyes were fixed on her almost made her want to tell him. "Well, I..." She felt a catch in her throat, and her lip quivered, but she continued. Confession time. "Well... No. No, I'm not. Not at all."

She turned to him, tears welling up in her eyes, and covered her mouth. She shook her head. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."

He chuckled, and put a hand on her shoulder. "Fiona, it's okay to cry."

"Not in front of you!" She blurted out, instantly letting her head fall onto his shoulder afterward. That was it, and she knew it. The mask was off. She couldn't change it now. "I mean, I know you know I'm a mess, but I didn't call you over here so I could cry at you." Actually yes, I did.

"You didn't?" He smiled, allowing her to lean on him. "Even if you did, that's fine, too."

She sniffled, and smiled, patting his arm gently. "You're... a good guy, Eli."

Again, he laughed, and kicked off his shoes. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She nodded. Fiona hadn't originally intended on talking about it, she just needed to be comforted. When she called him, it was more about just having someone to call, having someone who could show up. It was about having someone who would be there, like Holly J had, or Charlie, or anyone in the world but Fiona. But now that he was here, what was she supposed to do? She wouldn't be lying if she said she was expecting him to not show up. She reached for the tissues on the coffee table, but Eli leaned forward and grabbed them for her instead. She smiled to herself; he was so sweet. She sniffled. "Will you hold my hand?"

Without question, Eli took hold of her hand. She felt another tear roll down her cheek. "I'm alone, Eli. Like, really, really alone, and lonely. And Holly J is graduating, and my family is in New York, and Charlie has a new girlfriend, and I'm just so... solitary! It's all my fault, I know it is. It's just me... I've done this to myself. And next year, I'll have no one. But I deserve it! I just..."

Eli interrupted. "You'll have me."

Fiona looked up at him, expecting him to be smiling, but he wasn't. His face was completely serious. He squeezed her hand. "I'm not going anywhere." And then he smiled. "I promise."

Dabbing her eyes with a tissue, Fiona curled her legs and rested completely against him. She sighed. "What about you, though?"

"What about me?" he asked with mild confusion.

She looked up again, into his green eyes. His eyes were beautiful, glorious. "What if I can't be amazing like you? What if... I'm not as good a friend? What if I'm not always there for you?"

Eli smirked. "Do I have to write you a play?"

They laughed, and Fiona tucked some loose hair behind her ear. If she deserved to be so alone, how did she get him? Obviously, before she had worked on the play with him, she wouldn't have given him a second glance. Sure, he was handsome, appealing, but not the kind of guy you'd look at too long, especially if you don't even like guys anyway. The way he presented himself did not read, in her opinion, one of the sweetest boys you'll ever meet. She gently nuzzled his shoulder. She couldn't remember the last time she had someone with her like this; a shoulder to cry on, beautiful eyes to stare into, and unconditionally kind. She smirked. Too bad I'm a lesbian.

And of course, Eli was thinking the same thing. How many guys would want a gorgeous girl like Fiona curled against them, pouring her heart out, holding their hand? He counted himself lucky, and hoped it would last. Because even though he wasn't the one hurting right then, he needed this, too. The companionship, the feeling that someone was thinking of him, or would think of him. He enjoyed being able to be there for someone, especially after he had let so many people down. All he had done lately was shock, scare, and disappoint everyone. It was a refreshing change to be a comfort to someone, especially the one person who seemed to matter the most right now.

She closed her eyes, feeling tired. "Do you want to watch a movie or something?"

Eli shrugged gently. "If that's what you want, sure."

"Okay." Fiona started to shift, but stopped, and sunk back into where she was before. She sighed, laughing a little. "I don't want to move."

"Well then," Eli said, reaching for the TV remote, "Let's find something not horrendous on TV."

Fiona scoffed. "Impossible, Mr. Goldsworthy." She readjusted against him again, this time allowing a yawn to escape her soft, pink lips. She still had a thin layer of gloss on from when she had done her makeup less than three hours earlier. She opened her eyes, gazing up at Eli as he searched for something to watch, some kind of background noise. Despite her original impressions, his "different-ness" had finally grown on her. She was beginning to greatly enjoy his dark hair, skinny jeans, and buckle-covered shoes. She didn't even mind his chipping black nail polish. Quickly, he glanced down, and she looked away, completely embarrassed, but he just smiled. Suddenly, Fiona began to sit up straighter, leveling herself with him. "Eli..." she said softly, and as he turned his head to respond, she kissed him, pressing her lips against his with little force.

After a moment or two, he pulled away, looking more puzzled than ever. "Fiona, you're... I was under the impression I wasn't your type."

Fiona smirked, staring at her hands. Eli still hadn't let go. "Why does there have to be a type?" She looked back up at him, nervously. "Why can't we just like who we like?"

Eli smiled. "There's no rule saying we can't."

"Alright then," Fiona said quietly. She slowly moved her free hand up and rested it on Eli's shoulder. Again, she leaned in for a kiss, and he didn't reject her. She almost found it strange that kissing Eli, a boy, when she was so sure she didn't like boys at all, made her happy. He had soft lips, soft hair, and he was there for her. Right when she needed him, he was there. And he wasn't going anywhere. So Fiona disregarded her label as she continued to kiss Eli Goldsworthy, her only friend at Degrassi.