Evil always finds a way. That's the law we minions have known since the first of our kind dug out of the earth and decided to serve the sheer force that was and shall forever be called, evil. Yet there are times I, Gnarl, eldest or rather the more… capable, of minion intellects; have been at times confused by the sheer stupidity of our overlords. Of course I would never say this to one of their faces. After all, they are an overlord and prone to smashing or rather, slicing things. The better part is how at times I've been confused more over by the way that evil works. Oh well it was never my place to question such things. Evil is, as evil does. Oh; and how evil does…. It surely does. The best way to say how uniquely creative evil can truly be is by this one occurrence in my life. I've been around a long time yet this was my first time with this oddity, this unexpected twist in the will of pure evil. Though even I was so baffled by it, that was the will of evil and I suppose it was truly a worthy choice. The events that unfolded were rather… dare I say, EVIL?

Now how did it all start again?

Oh! Yes, it started…

The Overlady: Evil Knows No Gender

Written By: Pakkrat

(Disclaimer: I do not own nor have plans to take the rights of the creators of Overlord gaming franchise via Codemasters. The games however have impressed me a great deal and being in a particularly creative mood decided to do a story. In hopes of showing my appreciation to fellow fans of the great franchise. I hope you all enjoy and support the game series! Be a Overlord! Smash up cities, dominate and destroy all those in your path. Most importantly, smash fluffy animals… no matter how many elves in PETA may disagree, it's fun!)

The dark night had fallen over the graveyard of an under developed town called Spree. This place has been in disrepair since the events of five years past. With the hooting of owls on dead old trees and some refraining rummaging rodents along the less buried graves. There is more than these night beasts roaming these dark graves. Along the path in the grave is a lone lantern, dangling with a rod off the back of some small, robed creature. He shuffled along with a twitch of his long ears and whispered, "Give me my map…"

One hand reached behind him from four small figures like himself. They toothily smile as he unfurled the map and looked at it. Then he asks, "Gobbles?" The minion that he asked for came forward and did a salute. "Can you gimme a big smile?"

Gobbles was a bit confused, but he smiled before…

WHAP!

"This isn't the right map you idiot! This is a map to someone's hidden sweets in the kitchen!"

"Ahh…" Gobbles was whirling about on the ground his head spinning from the strike. "That where Gobbles put that. Hehe…"

A sigh and the robed figured rubbed his eyes. "Oh why, why must I deal with you babboons?"

"We not baboon, we minion."

"Difference is dually noted." He smiled then and crumpled up the map tossing it. "Well I have another means of finding our new overlord. Least one of us comes prepared." He turned about and asked, "You five just…" he frowned, then counts off heads, "One, two, three… four…" his eyes glare along counting again, "Where's Flow?"

The four other minions shrug and look about dumbly. Which not a surprise to the cloaked being. He growled a bit then strolled toward the area they came, "Flow! Flow you ragamuffin! Get up here this instant!" He stopped whispering, "Gnarl, you had to let the plant lover hold the shovels. Yes, perfect idea. Even if he is useless it's the fact you chose him. Blasted hindsight."

Now to be frank, though we're not. Flow was a unique minion. In truth he was seldom one to be respected among minion standards. Once in a dark age there is always some minion born with a tiny, weensy bit of good in them. They were never usually alive long yet when it happens it just happened. So they were often segregated by the populace. This was the same case of Flow. Originally, all minions are given rotten, revolting name yet when this minion was seen picking flowers his title had been turned to Flow. The poor bugger would never be the same.

Even now as he was sitting beside the most gorgeous of flowers he'd seen in his short minion life. When Gnarl finally screamed enough to make him perk up his ears. He just wasn't sure how to react. After all Gnarl was kind of scary. Looking to the flower he pulled out some then snagged the shovels getting rushed toward Gnarl. "Comin'!" Flow screamed as he fumbled with the shovels and trying to hide the flowers.

However it was only a twist of fate, and evil; the flower flew out of his hand whilst he tripped on a large rock in the path. Gnarl had turned to the voice of the minion to suddenly see this pink, fluffy flower with its golden inner bud a glow. His eyes wide in horror and mouth slowly gapping into the beginning of the words, 'Nooooo!' before, IT happened. The puffy thing went into his face, the pollen of its sweet scent and smell focusing into his facial expanse. Gnarl screamed as he tossed his head and stomped around.

Flow was cringing as he knew this is bad… not the good kind, but the kind where he's going to be laughed at or worse, beat with a mallet. When the other minions came and swiped off his face he screamed pummeling them with his own fists. "Bugger off! It's too late!" He shook his head, rubbing his eyes, "Gah! I've got this putrid mess in my eyes! It's burning everything!" He turned back to the others only able to make a faint image of them as blurs with ears, as well their eyes. "Bah, of course. This makes my night. I will…" he turned about, "Flow! Front and center!"

Cowering a bit. Little Flow came closer humbled before Gnarl. "M'yes?" He winced as Gnarl raised his fist, yet never struck. He just let something drop from his fingers on a kind of chain. "What 'dis?"

"That, is a dark shard of the last overlord's gauntlet. Found when he perished." He turned to Flow though he is not sure it was him and not a bloody bush. "I want you to use it to find us a soul still trapped inside one of these bodies. A fresh body sometimes retains the soul of the deceased especially if they have some unfinished work on this plane." A wicked grin and he leaned in whispering, "Which means we can ressurect them thru the tower heart."

"Ooh…" Flow took the item and let it hang. He smiled as it shines, "Pretty shinny thing."

"Yes, but that's not what's important." Gnarl raised a finger, "The important part is the glow. As you see it is gray, most likely…" he frowns, "Is it gray?"

Flow looked to see it was a very dull gray glow. "M'hmm?"

"Good!" Gnarl turned to stumble into a minion whom tripped and fell into the bushes, "Ahh… Oh I wouldn't allow you to do this Flow if not for one thing." He turned back this time shaking a fist at a bush, "I'm not in the mood to smite you now. IF you do this correctly, I'll just leave you be and happily watch for our new Overlord to one day sacrifice you in battle. Hehe… yes, more fitting."

As Gnarl and the others go on some had snickered and point at Flow. Flow lowered his ears and sighed. "M'yes. I understand."

Walking behind he grabbed the shovels picking them up again, having a time with them. Yet worse he saw his flower… he shifts his eyes and took it once more after placing the gem on the chain in his mouth clamped tightly within his jaw. Following behind carrying all he had to now.

Gnarl followed behind a minion having his ear painfully pulled. While it whined, he said, "Stop your complaining Wurm! I'm just tugging along, get it? Heh…." with a tug that made the minion squeal, "That's a good one." He smiled wickedly, "Oooh! Even better, lend me your ear! Hah!" He was having such fun. Gnarl spoke up to them all. "I am so excited. Reviving a new overlord brings the giddy in me. Perhaps it's the fact I'm so thrilled since five years we've been without. With that last mishap…" the others stop, and Gnarl informs, "No time for that. The sun should be rising eventually and we'd be best not to be seen robbing graves." He admits, "Though, we are fit for ghoulish work am I right?"

The minions all but Flow cheer. Flow was now trying to shuffle that pretty flower into his loincloth. Yet was not successful with all these shovels. Gnarl heard the clatter and said, "Careful back there Flow. We need that crystal to find our overlord. You see, it will glow dark black over only the dark and wicked graves. Meaning the darker that stone glows the more evil our new overlord." Gnarl let go of the minion's ear to rub his hands with some delightfully evil manners. Long enough that Wurm rubbing his ear, suddenly grabbed the minion Gobbles and pulled him to Gnarl. Gnarl took that new minion who cried, but was ignored.

"The most important part is that the gauntlet fragment retains just enough energy to find us a new Overlord. So whatever you do, don't drop it Flow!" Flow smiled and went to speak an 'Aiy-aiy' but when his mouth opened the obvious happened. The crystal fell and cracked on the rocky path. He looked in a gasp as it did and a small energy seeped out from the stone! He grabbed it and held it in his hand dropping that flower… ohh… he whined and looked about. "Ah-ha! We're here!"

Flow looked up to the graves now left for some time. A large amount of them behind the city. Of course, that was to be expected. Flow ran over with the slowly seeping gem. "Flow, quickly hold out the gem. See where it leads us to the first trapped soul."

A nod, Flow let it dangle. Energy was seeping out faster when it did. Yet it was a glow now, first a light yellow, and red… it was changing many colors. Soon he realized how the more bright ones would be to his left so he hurriedly ran to the colors of darker kind. "This way! This way!"

"Wha-ah!" Gnarl is dragged by the other minions screaming and clattering along. "Wait! WAIT!!!" Yet he fell and growled while getting up. Luckily able to follow the loud heathens along. "Well? What color? Did you find one?"

Flow watched this gem it was sifting colors still. Yet it seemed darkest over this one grave. He looked down to the semi-fresh dirt then to the grave itself. It has no name, no title it was just a large block of stone. There is one thing that was written or rather carved crudely. The word was, 'Good riddance' and that alone was a good sign! Flow smiled while watching the stone again now it was back to the gray color. It was slowly sifting to some other color, lighter… no darker! Yes! Darker! Wai… no it's lighter… darker…..

FZZT!

That sound was strange. Especially when the gem was black now… just all of a sudden. He then realized it was because the energy in it was gone. He whined as his ears droop… oh no. Yes, there is a soul but…

"Well Flow!" Gnarl stood behind the minion as he was turning sadly, ashamed of his failure. "What color is the stone?"

"…." Flow held it in his hand lowering his eyes. "No color…"

"None?" Gnarl, still blinded seemed to think, "Hmm… is it dark?"

"Very…" He whimpered, but then heard laughter.

Oh so loud was Gnarl as he was careening his hands before turning about. "Get the shovels! Dig you imbeciles!" He heard them cheer and begin the dig. Gnarl strolling back away from the site. "This is perfect. The darkest ever! I can only imagine how evil this overlord must be… what does the grave say?"

"Good Riddance!" called the minion who only now was straightening out his poor ear. Gobbles really hates that he has such long ears…

"ARE you serious?" Gnarl was just about to scream while jumping out of his skin. "Oh! That is splendid! I can only imagine the evil that this person commited! What if it's a mass murderer! We haven't had one of those in a long time." He frowned, "Ask Harley… poor new born will never be the same again…"

Flow was trying to tell them the truth. He wanted to say it was broken, that he broke it. Yet when he realized all the digging and Gnarl's excitement. What was the point? They have a new overlord! That's all that mattered! Heh, he even grabbed his shovel and got to digging after putting the gem in his mouth again. If he told the truth, they would only beat him… laugh, whatever.

This way it was not a big deal.

~~~~~~

It took a few hours. When the work was done the sun was just rising. Luckily the body wasn't buried deep, in fact it was close to the surface. They must have either been in a hurry, or just didn't care. It was a blessing for the minions though. Then Gnarl ran his fingers over the casket. "My word…" he traveled head to toe, counting off the distance. "This fellow is rather big… if he fits this whole thing. About 7 foot. Heh, we lucked out…" He turned to the minions but… in reality, it was a small flock of buzzards. "Okay boys you know the drill. Up and at'em!"

The minions looked confused but got the idea. Mostly smirking and snickering as he was now telling the buzzards to move it or loose it. The five grab random areas and heave, finding the large lord was HEAVY… boy was he. Eventually they got him up enough to move him from the shallow grave and out onto the road.

It was just about then Gnarl was tugging the head of one his minions, to be clucked in the head himself. He ran screaming as they pecked him before flying away. Gnarl wasn't at all amused… but the minions, they were. He growled and ordered them, "Forward to the tower gate. We don't have all day."

They were off on the march to the gate. Flow happen to be at the head of the casket and when they were back on the road to the gate he noticed his flower. A smile, he perked his ears… but he can't stop to just pick up a flower. Then he thought about it… and… a smirk, he 'fell' with the casket after the flower. Then hurriedly scooped it into his cloth. The stem hung across his waist as minions Gobbles and Wurm laughed and point, dropping the casket on another minion's foot whom screamed while hopping up and down.

They now all laugh at him instead. Until Gnarl snapped, "Get your hands back on that casket, and hurry it to the gate! The first one that doesn't in the count of three…" they didn't wait and it lifts again. Gnarl smiled and gave a turn to the gate "That's more like it." He laughed to the sound of some grumbles, "Oh come now. You all know it's for the greater evil."

The next they all were on the portal and vanish in a light of magic. All except Gnarl whom sighed dreamily. "I just can't wait for our new overlord. I bet he's a vicious, ruthless tyrant." He spat, "Unlike that last mistake we had…"

~~~~~~

The tower, place of evil the domain to darkness! This was the heart of the evil work these minions did so enjoy. Even if it was a wee bit… out of repair. The signs of large boulders that have torn thru the walls of stone, and some fire damage did incline thoughts it was less than what it could have been. Even some areas broken down and shattered thru the years.

The minions appear with the casket and set it down panting a bit now that they are home. Gnarl sighed when he instantly stepped into some rubble, stubbing his toe with a minor irritation. "Yes… well we need to clean this place up."

"Not enough minions…" warned Wurm, who was already wiping his brow with another minion's ear. That's before that minion whapped him one, and the sharing of slaps ensued.

"Well not yet." Gnarl smiled back though, "When we awake our master then we'll retrieve the brown hive from the garbage out back." He strummed his fingers on the lid, "The only place those damnable lord of the land didn't look for it. Of course, to assure the survival of our kind many measures needed to be taken. Things were just all out of control. The death of the last overlord was far too open to knowledge." He sighed, "Leaving a nice gap for our dark forces."

The minions were lowering their heads to the thought of it all. Yet Gnarl perhaps getting a sense of their concern drove them back with slapping his hands together three times. "Alright you puss-spewing scum willowers! Let's get the work of evil in order! Take the new Overlord to the tower heart!"

Cheers of the coming of their overlord was great to hear. Gnarl grinned widely as they were off down the stairs to the heart. Yet he heard screams, and falling… sliding… "Oh, I forgot we're still missing that third step…"

They moan and grumble as they all fell fairly roughly. Yet the overlord and his casket were all intact. Now they gleam in pride as Gnarl skillfully made his way to the glowing magical orb at the center of this lower chamber. It was churning with the great magical power… it had been hidden many times yet today when the time was right they revived it to the coming of a new overlord. Since they needed its magic to radiate the body and revive the fallen being. That is the plan at least. The way to do it relied on the jugs of water they had hanging above the heart glowing now with magic. Gnarl asked, "How bright is the glow?" He sighed rubbing his eyes. "Damn flower… I'll probably be blind in one eye for some time." He shrugged that off though, "Not really a big deal we only need one eye to serve evil."

The minions turned up and say, "It pretty glowy color."

"That's perfect. Than let's pull it down and get the bath ready." They move the coffin toward a watery area of the lower chamber. It was here they once held the blues. When they return, they can absorb that magic. Yet for now the important part was to set the master in this water and pour in that water now infused by the heart. When it was done, the water was a glow with magic. Gnarl seemed pleased as if feeling the magic. It did give a nice feel to the old, dark bones.

Leaving up the steps Gnarl tells, "Well then we'll wait until tomorrow. When our master is awake it'll be time to get him properly seated in our kingdom. To mayhem, mass genocide and who knows what else he'll like! Oh, I can't wait!" His hands all shook, "Look! I have goose pimples!"

They all were up in the main hall before any realized Flow was still at the bottom of the steps. He looked at the casket and looked to his flower. A small smile and he shrugged. The crystal showed a soul was in that body. That he knew. The fact they are good or evil, wasn't so sure. What he knew was evil had an overlord. Tomorrow, their overlord will be awoken. Then all will be…

"FLOW!" Gnarl screamed down, "Get your posterior moving! Since it's your fault I'm only working with one eye you have to be my personal eye dog. Now move it, so I can find my beetles."

Laughter was his cue. A sigh, and Flow looked back only one more moment before swiftly getting down and digging a small hole. Where he hid his flower for tomorrow. "Get you water soon. Got to go, see you soon!"

He was off. The next day would be very eventful. None of them wanted the master to see a complete mess. Not like this at least. So cleaning and perperation was important especially at the throne of the dark one. Even if it was chipped and broke, the nice design of a minion was perfect for this early matter.

~~~~~~

The following day. It was time, time to see the new master. Every minion waited at the top of the steps jumping and chewing their nails. The five were so anxious. Flow even had a small glass of water for his plant. Yet they await Gnarl who entered with a patch over one eye. He sighed a bit upset, "The worst of my days. One bad eye and now I'm otherwise worse for look." He shrugged that one off. Gnarl smiled his nefarious smile while looking among the five eager minions. "Okay boys… time to introduce ourselves to evil!"

The group hurried down all excited. To find as they turn to the watery area of the blues there was no one. The coffin was busted open! This is a good sign, yes. However where was the overlord? Sure enough a rustling was heard. Gnarl turned first and saw someone bent over near the very entrance they had passed. Where a long haired being had somewhat turned to them with glowing yellow eyes.

"Master have evil eyes…" whispered one pleased minion.

The master stood, his mighty back rippling of muscle. A strong set of shoulders showing this was not a pushover considering he stood rather tall.

"Master also have big mighty arms. Hehe… good!"

Though, Gnarl has been watching with a smile. His… smile, had kind of fallen in a slacked jaw while the master turned around. His hips were more wide than any normal overlord… as well was his chest seeming a bit bigger and rounder along the pectorals. Gnarl watched as their new overlord was standing a few steps away.

"The master have…." Flow blinked, "Uh…"

Gnarl, asked simply, "Flow, that you?"

"M'hm?" He smiled before Gnarl yanked his head, "Owwie!!!"

"WHERE the hell is my crystal?" Gnarl snapped as the little minion was looking for it. He winced as he was given it his hand shakily clasping the gem. Opening it slowly he whispered, "Please don't be… be…"

Sure enough it was broken… energy gone. His little, evil eye twitching as he asked, "How long has there been a crack in it?"

"Uh…" A little bit of a gulp, Flow says, "It be broken since… last night." He nods, "After it did glow."

"Color?"

"…." a skiddish, weak whisper, "No color…"

"Heh, because it was broken?" Gnarl's eye twitching as his head actually turned without his body to the little minion. Then a tick of his head whilst he asks, "That's what you meant wasn't it…?"

"Uh…" A nod, "Yes…"

"Ah…" Gnarl slowly turned up to the large woman who looked at them confused. She was wearing to his distaste a light jerkin outfit. She was some kind of adventurer, or lowly peasant? Who knows… who cares? She was a damn wench. Walking around her and to the stairs he left up into the main chamber.

It was finally Wurm whispers, "You think he…"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

"Oooh…" the four others say behind little Flow. "You in trouble!!!"

"Me know…" A sigh, Flow looked down sad as his ears did droop, "Me know…" Although, it was a surprise when he saw something colorful in his eyesight. Looking up the master was bent down offering him the flower. This, made him whimper, "Oh, me hope not too much trouble."

~~~~~~

After a while of his own time with cursing and snarling. Gnarl returned to say, "Okay, let's deal with this mess before…"

He returned to see his minions who for the most part he'd forgotten. Were scrambling all about with…

"HEY!" He snapped as they were fastening the cape onto the back of this woman. "Take that off… before…"

Surely, he was surprised. As this female Overlord stepped down from a perch they had given her. They had just set the last part of her outfit being that iconic helmet over her head. Even with her long, brown hair falling across both the front and back of her chest. It was so intimidating with her strange, yellow eyes glaring down at him. All of her body was covered with the subjective overlord styled armor that was perfectly collected. Even the right handed gauntlet now glowing with a energy of the overlord. He had not expected this…

Walking around her twice as she kind of eyed him while passing. Gnarl's grin had grown rather wide. Sure, it's a new take on things. A little more to get used to. Yet in all his days it was never really the merit of what one looked like. It was the imposing figure that matters in the sight of an Overlord. Gnarl stood finally at the front of her and gave a nod.

Yet… "We need armor for her boobies."

Gnarl frowned as he admired her jerkin pressed out from the armor over her shoulders and arms, as well legs and pelvis. Yet the fact did remain none of their armor will properly nest her breasts. "Well for now we need the reds…" he sighed, "Oh what a day. Knowing that those old fellows are not near us." He looked to Flow, "For a mistake this could work though…"

Flow was smiling with his flower. Gnarl glared angrily, and the minion hid it behind his back with a smile and wave. Before running out of sight.

Still he had to admit when looking up at her. She's perfect for the size and form. Very well… this will do.

"Hmm," he raises a brow. "What about the junkyard?" He looked to one of his minions. "I mean after all. There is a great deal of metal there. Gibblet!" He smirked, "You're fairly handy with a hammer. How about we work out something with some of the spare metal out there?"

Gibblet, whom lately was just kind of lazing about. Finally stood up and blinked to his closer pal Gobbles. "Me? You don't mean Gobble?"

Gnarl shook his head. "No, no! I saw you smash those rats and then, tie a dead one to a stick! That Rat-flail idea was classic!"

"Oh…" Gibblet had not known that any saw his toying around. "Okay."

"Well then!" Here, Gnarl slammed a fist to his palm. "You heard me! We need to get our new master into proper attire! As well get ourselves the brown hive!" He looked about, "We've got to hurry! The tower has been in such disrepair, many things have to be fixed, opened and finished!"

As the minions were going on trying to think what to do next. The entire group including Gnarl stopped and turned fast to this sound. It was a… whine.

Gnarl looked confused. Then heard the strange, strong yet definitely feminine voice ask this odd, unexpected question.

"Who… am I?"

There is a silent pause at the shock of hearing the voice. Till now all their masters have been not only men, but the voice of pure evil! A voice that was greedy, hungry and devoted to the act of wicked deeds.

This was different. It was somewhat innocent and just, the female voice is so different!

Gnarl slowly looked at his feet. Eye still one in a patch, it would show both of them scanning for an answer. Then with a naughty grin he tells her.

"You are the Overlady." A nod, "And we, are you loyal minions."

The five behind him bow as he did a slight nod. They giggle and laugh like kids, as each turned over to the other. Though what she asked next was a bit unexpected.

"Uh, why?"

"Well…" Gnarl had not expected this one. He just shrugged and said that which came to mind.

"Because Evil always finds a way."

(Thanks. Hope everyone likes this story. Tis only Chapter 1. You'll see I'm using a lot of stuff actually from Overlord. Not to say this is genuinely supposed to be the same story or anything. There will be a lot of differences and original stuff. Mostly, because I liked thinking all this stuff up. Next chapter coming soon. I hope everyone likes it so far. ^_^)