A/N - Not completed yet i will try to update when ever i can. Feel free to tell me if i have any grammer issues i have been known to miss them sometimes.
Harm's house
Massachusetts
2 years ago
"Be careful Honey"
"Harm how many times have I made this trip"
"I know, but you never know. Just be careful"
"OK take care of Chris"
"When do I not"
"Well your going in the woods just be careful"
"Don't worry everything will be fine unless one of those bears come and steal our food."
"Harm there are no bears in that camp ground"
"It's Maine you never know"
"Be careful"
"Ok you better get going you don't want to miss you flight"
"Ok bye I love you"
"Love you too"
"Bye Mommy" Said Chris as he waddled over next to Harm.
"Bye sweetie"
Back to present
Navy housing
Washington DC
Harm was snapped out of his day dream of the last time he spoke to his wife by Chris coming out of his room.
"Chris you ready to go?"
"Yeah daddy let me just get Hammer"
"Ok" Harm grabbed his brief case and waited for Chris.
"I'm ready" Said Chris as he stood at the feet of his father.
"Ok Jump up" Said Harm as he leaned down and scooped Chris into his arms.
JAG HQ
Falls Church Virginia
7:00 AM
"Good Morning Colonel." Said Bud as he walked into the break room.
"Good Morning Bud. How was your weekend?"
"Good I was with little AJ most of the time ma'am"
"I have to come by and see him soon"
"Anytime ma'am. Did you hear the rumor that we are getting a new guy."
"Yeah I did and I hope it is true. I also heard though that it would be a few weeks before they found someone."
"Maybe they will send a temporary replacement to help with the load"
"I sure hope so. Well I have a ton of paper work with my name on it"
"Have a good day colonel."
"You too Bud"
As soon as Mac walked into her office her phone rang. "What now" she said to herself. "Colonel Mackenzie… yes sir… that is good news sir… when will he be starting?... that's great news sir. Do you know who he is… yes sir I understand procedure." Mac let out a sigh of relief upon receiving news that she would get some help while they find a replacement for Harm. "You would think this would have happened 3 years ago after the last guy was reassigned." She mumbled to her self while doing her paper work.
Harm arrived five minutes late as usual. He was so nervous that he almost couldn't make it to the door. Chris was fidgeting in Harms arms sensing how nervous he was made him nervous as well. "Come on Rabb pull yourself together." He mumbled to himself. He signed in at the front desk and then picked Chris back up and headed to the bullpen.
When he walked in every ones eyes were on him. The ones who didn't know him went back to work, but the ones who did stared in awe at a man they hadn't seen in years. Harm walked towards the Admirals office.
"Tiner I need to see the admiral"
Tiner recognized the voice talking to him, but he couldn't figure out why until he looked at the origin of the voice. "Yes si… Commander Rabb!"
"Tiner I'm already late."
"Yes sir" he got up and knocked on the admiral's door. "Sir Commander Rabb is here to see you."
"Send him in"
Harm walked in and stood at attention the best he could with Chris in his arms. "Commander Rabb reporting for duty"
"At ease, take a seat." Said the admiral as he put his glasses on the table and looked up from the file. What he saw in front of him rendered him speechless. He saw a little boy who was the spitting image of Rabb staring questioningly at him.
"Sir?"
"I'm sorry"
"This is Chris. He's my son"
"No kidding. He looks just like you"
"So I've been told."
"Hi Chris I'm admiral Chegwidden"
"Hi adminal"
"You can call me AJ"
"Hi AJ"
"Chris why don't you go play for a second while I talk to the admiral"
"Ok"
"He's cute Rabb."
"Thank you sir"
"Although I don't know if this world can handle to Rabbs"
"He is better behaved than me"
"Good thing"
"He listens to his superiors"
"That's good. Down to business. You will be helping the Colonel out with one case, a major one, and then there are a few other small cases that you can take from the colonel. She has a big work load."
"They never found a replacement?"
"They did but he was reassigned and no one has gotten around to finding a new guy. So Mac has been stuck with it all and now they are searching. It took me forever to convince them to send you here to help."
"Does the colonel know it's me?"
"No I just found out 5 minutes before you arrived"
"Good thing I was late"
"Yeah still have not fixed that problem."
"Nope"
"Glad to have you back. Dismissed."
"Aye Aye sir." Harm scooped Chris up and then walked out of the office and headed for Mac's office.
"Daddy"
"Yes Chris?"
"Was that your boss?"
"Yes it was"
"Where are we going now?"
"To see Colonel Mackenzie."
"Who is Colonel Mackenwe?"
"You can call her Mac. She is my former partner."
"Oh ok"
Harm approached Mac's door, took a deep breathe, and then knocked. "Enter" he heard from the other side and walked in. Her head was buried in a file and she didn't notice it was him who walked in.
"So you must be the new gu…" she said as she looked up from the file. "No not new"
"Hi Mac"
"Harm. Is that your son?"
"Yeah how did you know?"
"He has your eyes and looks just like you"
"Oh well this is Chris"
"Hi Chris I'm Mac"
"Hi" he said as he clung to his father.
"How old are you"
"Five" he said while holding up one hand. Chris relaxed a little and loosened up his grip on Harm. Then he flew Hammer into Harms head. Mac laughed.
"Oww"
"Put me down Daddy"
"Ok just don't break anything"
"Yes sir"
"Cute" said Mac as she watched Chris play with his plane.
"I see you got him into flying"
"Hey what can I say?"
"Ok so about this case"
"I don't know anything"
"Typical. Ok well a Marine was murdered in her home on the base after being sexually assaulted. The main suspect as of now is her ex, who is also a Marine."
"Any other suspects?"
"Yes a few. She made a lot of enemies, but alibis have been established for a few."
"When are we going out to the base?"
"We have an appointment tomorrow."
"Ok"
"I'm sure you have a lot to do before you can start on this case."
"Yeah tell me about it. How about we go out to lunch"
"Sure sounds good"
As he stood up he put his hand on the desk and Mac caught a glimpse of his wedding ring. A little piece of her heart broke. She was too late. Although when she saw Chris she figured he had a wife, but seeing the wedding ring just made it all so real.
"Chris time to vacate this office and head off to mine"
"Aye Aye Sir."
"Do you want to walk?"
"No carry me"
"Ok jump up" Harm leaned down and Chris jumped into his arms. Mac watched him and had to smile. She could see that Chris was his life. She had never seen a smile like that on his face before. He was truly happy when he was with Chris.
Harm headed to his office. On his way through the bullpen he saw Bud and Harriet and decided to go say hi. First he went in his office to put the file he had down and then he went to see them, but when he came back Harriet was gone.
"Commander Rabb?"
"Bud hey"
"Who's the little one sir?"
"My son Chris"
"Hey Chris I'm Bud"
"Hi"
"Cute kid sir"
"So what brings you back?"
"I am the temporary fill in until they get someone else."
"Oh well it is nice to see you again and we should get together before you go back."
"Ok just tell me when and where"
"Yes sir"
Harm went back to his office to finish up the paper work he had. He put Chris down so he could play. Harm hated paper work and couldn't wait to actually investigate something.
"Daddy?"
"Yes buddy"
"What are you doing?"
"Paper work"
"Can I help?"
"Sure come on up here."
"Ok" Chris climbed up in Harm's lap and watched everything he did. He was fascinated by his father's work.
"Buddy can you hand me that folder right there near hammer"
"This one?"
"Yeah"
"Here you go"
"Thank you"
"What is it?"
"That case I'm working on with Mac"
"Oh. Where will I go when you investigate since the sergeant isn't here?"
"Do you remember Skates?"
"Yeah from the Patrick Henry your old ship"
"Yeah well the Patrick Henry is in port right near here and she offered to watch you on the carrier while I'm at work"
"Really!"
"Yup and I have another surprise for you"
"What is it?"
"Today after work I'm going to bring you to see the f-14 that I fly"
"Can I sit in it?"
"Of course"
"YAY!"
"What's going on in here?" asked Mac.
"Daddy is taking me to see his F-14"
"Sounds like fun"
"What can I do for you?"
"Lunch"
"Oh wow what time is it?"
"12:01 and 15 seconds"
"I still want to know how you do that"
"I count"
"Sure. Chris are you hungry"
"Yeah"
"Ok then let's go"
Harm put one last signature on the paper he was reading and then he was read to go. Chris was very excited and couldn't stop moving in Harm's arms.
"Chris do you want to walk?"
"Ok" Harm put him down and took his hand so he wouldn't run off.
"Which car?" asked Harm.
"I have my vette so let's take yours"
"Ok"
They arrived at Harm's SUV a few minutes later. Harm buckled Chris in the back and then hopped in the driver's side and they were off. They went to a little place down the street that a lot of military personnel go for lunch. It took them about five minutes to get there and then another five to be seated. It was a small but cozy restaurant. The tables were circular and had four chairs. Harm and Mac sat across from each other and Chris on the other side of the circle.
"Hi I'm Tom can I get you anything to drink?"
"I'll have water. Chris what do you want?"
"Coke"
"Ok"
"And I'll have a coke too"
"Still don't eat healthy there Mac"
"Nope I see Chris doesn't follow in your footsteps"
"Not at all he hates all vegetables except green beans"
"What a good boy"
The waiter returned with there drinks quickly and they ordered there food. Chris and Mac had a burger and Harm had a salad.
"So I see he likes burgers too"
"Yeah I have to buy meat now"
"Ha maybe you can even have a burger"
"No Chris tried that once"
"What a good boy"
"Don't encourage him"
Chris watched them go back and forth and laughed.
"What's so funny?"
"I don't know"
"Be careful with Hammer don't knock your drink over"
"I won't daddy"
"Ok. So Mac how have you been?"
"I'm good. A lot of work that is all I do is work"
"Nothing fun?"
"Nope nothing"
"Yeah the marines keep me busy"
"What exactly do you do?"
"Umm well it's complicated"
"Harm"
"Ok I train them in rules of engagement and file paper work and defend them if they get in trouble. It is like sea duty only on land and with a ton of jar heads"
"Sounds like fun for a squid"
"Oh yes"
"What about the little squid"
"He is with the Marines"
"So he is a little Jar head"
"No a little fly boy"
"He does have that grin"
Chris' glass was about to tip over and Harm instinctively grabbed it before it spilled. Mac caught a glimpse of his wedding ring again. She really wanted to ask him, but she wasn't sure if she should or not. Oh the hell with it she thought I'll just ask him. "So Harm are you married?"
Harm looked away from Chris and down at the floor. Mac saw the pain in his eyes and wished she hadn't pried. "No I was but she died in a plane crash two years ago" He said more to the ground than to her. He quickly composed himself and looked back up at her.
"I'm sorry I saw the ring and"
"No don't I'm fine really."
She could see that he wasn't fine, but they were on shaky enough ground as it is there was no reason to push and hurt him more.
"Daddy"
"Yea buddy"
"I dropped Hammer"
Harm leaned down and picked it up. "Here you go."
"Thank you"
They got there food soon after and finished the meal in almost complete silence.
JAG HQ
Falls Church Virginia
12:45 PM
Mac, Harm, and Chris walked into the bullpen with fifteen minutes left of there lunch break.
"Sir, Ma'am" yelled Bud
"Yeah Bud" they both said in unison.
"Harriet and I were going to have some people over tomorrow night would you like to come?"
"Sure Bud sounds like fun, but I really must get back to the paper work so I can get to court on time."
"Ok Ma'am. Sir?"
"Sure sounds cool"
"Chris can come too"
"Ok what time?"
"Arrive around 7 and we should eat at like 7:30 maybe. Is that alright?"
"Yeah that's fine. I usually eat around then"
"Ok see you then sir"'
"Bud where is Harriet I haven't seen her all day?"
"Umm sir I think she is angry with you because you disappeared"
"Some things just need to happen and well that is something I needed to do. I still have some time left before I must get back to work and I can explain to you why I left if you are mad at me too"
"Ok sir. I am not angry with you but maybe I can help Harriet" Bud followed Harm into his office and took a seat.
"Chris here is Hammer"
"Thank you daddy" Chris looked at his father and then got an idea. "Daddy"
"Yes buddy"
"Do you have any paper?"
"Yeah here ya go and here is a pencil"
"Thank you" Chris ran off to draw a picture and play with Hammer. Harm watched him play and smiled remembering when he used to do that with his toy plane.
"Sir you are good with him."
"He reminds me of me when I was his age."
"I always knew you'd be a great dad"
"Thank you Bud. Well mine as well start from the beginning, but you have to promise me that you will keep to yourself except well you can tell Harriet some of it just not everything"
"Yes sir I promise"
"Ok well a lot of people already figured this out but I am in love with Mac and have been since I met her. That is what I don't want people to know. Anyways we have been dancing around the subject of 'us' for a long time. If I am ready to talk to her she isn't ready and if she is ready than I am not. I will say that I am the one who mostly walked away and I can't figure out why. Well the Admiral told me a day ahead of time that I would most likely be transferred because they needed me in Mass. I went to talk to her because I didn't want her to find out when I was leaving. The truth is I went to tell her how I feel but we got in a huge fight after I said because she thought I only wanted her when one of us was leaving. I told her that I loved her and that I would give up my career and stay here to be with her, but she was upset and angry. She pushed me away. The next day I received my orders and I left. I couldn't stay here because it was too hard for both me and Mac. I was a mess. I hadn't slept the night before and my heart was in pieces. In Mass I was a depressed, drunk mess. I just wanted to dig a hole and die. Then I met Kelly and I fell in love with her. I never stopped loving Mac and I don't think I ever will, but something about Kelly. I loved her. She got pregnant and we got married shortly after. I wanted to call all of you but I just couldn't. If I went back I would never heal and go on with my life. Even while I was with Kelly I was a mess and broken, but I was happy in most ways. Then my son was born and I had something to live for. He is all I have. Two years ago Kelly's plane crashed and she died. I knew I had to go on for Chris so I pulled my self together for him. I wish I could have kept in touch, but all of you are connected to Mac and it would have been like pouring salt on my open wounds. It was just too hard and I had to focus on Chris. Now I am here and my life is good."
"I am sorry about your wife"
"Its ok Bud really I am fine."
"Isn't hard for you to be here now?"
"Yes, but I do what I am told and me and Mac are fine. It was hard for me to come here though knowing that I hurt all of you."
"Sir I am not sure why you told me all of this but I promise not to say anything"
"Bud you are one of my good friends and I trust and frankly I needed to talk to someone."
"I am always here sir"
"Thank you Bud"
Meanwhile in Mac's office
"Ma'am can I talk you for a minute?"
"Sure Harriet anytime"
"Thank you ma'am"
"Have a seat. What can I do for you?"
"Aren't you mad at the Commander for just leaving like he did?"
"A part of me is and a part me understands why he left."
"I guess I am mad because I don't understand why he left"
"Me"
"Excuse me Ma'am"
"The night before he received his transfer orders he came to my house. He had been told unofficially about the transfer and wanted to tell me before I found out other ways. I was upset, but not at him. Then he said what I have always wanted to hear from him; something I never thought he would say to me. He said I love you Sarah. I felt as if he would only say it when one of us was leaving and I yelled at him. I was hurt and angry and I wasn't sure what was going on. So much had happened in such a short period of time. Then he told me that he would give it all up for me and stay her just to be with me. He apologized for taking so long to realize how he felt for me, but he said he was willing to give up everything for me. I told him to leave and pushed him out the door. I fell apart that night. I wish I could go back, but I can't."
"May I ask why you rejected him?"
"I was scared. I waited so long to hear that and I had become accustom to not hearing it. Then all of a sudden he said it and I thought I was dreaming and I didn't know what to say. I just did what I always do."
"Do you love him?"
"Yes I do" she responded before she realized what she had said. "You can't say anything to anyone."
"Yes ma'am"
"And no match maker"
"I would never ma'am."
"Ok thanks"
"One more question. Why don't you just tell me how you feel?"
"Right now I think I am lucky if he will be my friend"
"I still think he should be lucky if you'd be his"
"See the thing is though I pushed him out the door and I made it impossible for him to stay here. Harm may be brave and courageous in his tomcat but in his life he isn't he wants to make the people he love happy first and then himself. That is why he never stopped my wedding all he wanted was for me to be happy. He walked away because I made it too hard for him to stay here so he did what he does best he leaves. Usually he just tries not to mention it but in this case he had to leave."
"Oh sounds like the Commander. So who is the little guy he has with him?"
"His son Chris, I can't believe you haven't met the little guy. He is so cute."
"I'll make sure to stop by before I leave or sometime before he leaves."
"Colonel" said Tiner as he stepped into the office.
"Yes Tiner"
"Sergeant Tucker is here for you."
"Ok but since when do you work for my office too?"
"He walked in to ask where your office was"
"Ok send him in"
"Yes ma'am"
"Thank you colonel." Said Harriet as she walked out of the office.
After work Harm took Chris to the Patrick Henry. Chris had tons of fun and Harm loved being back on a carrier. Chris loved the F-14 and loved sitting in it. Skates took a picture of them in the cockpit together. Chris is sitting in Harm's lap and they both have huge grins on there faces. After they left Harm immediately got the picture developed and put the one of the both of them in a picture frame so he could have it on his desk.
The next morning Harm dropped Chris off with Skates and then headed off to work. When he got to work he and Mac went to the base to talk to the suspects. They got back an hour before they could go home. They went over the case in Harm's office.
"The medical report says she was tossed down a flight of stairs and…"
"Oh how cute"
"What? Being thrown down a flight of stairs is cute. Are you sure you're not crazy?"
"No Harm, the picture of you and Chris in the cockpit."
"Oh yeah that is from yesterday"
"That is such a good picture of you two."
"I have an extra picture if you want one"
"If you don't mind"
"No I have like six. I'll bring it to Bud's tonight"
"Is Chris coming?"
"Yeah I don't leave him alone all that often and well especially not here because well he can't stay with the Marines"
"Staying with Marines, good teaching him early whose boss"
"Yeah right. He loves the sergeant though"
"That's cute"
"They call him there little devil dog. They gave him some camouflage; he looks so cute. Wait I have picture" he pulled out his wallet and showed her the picture of Chris and the sergeant.
"That is so cute. Is that the sergeant?"
"Yeah"
"Does he go to kindergarten?"
"No he missed the cut off date by two weeks."
"What is the date?"
"You have to be five by August 30th and he turned five on September 14th"
"Wow that is strict"
"Yeah that is why they are called mass holes"
"I've heard that before" she said with a laugh.
"Speaking of the little man I have to go pick him up."
"Oh wow time just flew by"
"I'll see you tonight"
"Ok bye"
When Harm pulled up Chris was so excited. He ran over to the car before Harm had fully gotten out of the car.
"DADDY!" yelled Chris.
"Hey buddy" Harm leaned down and picked him up. "How was your day?"
"Awesome, I helped skates and then she showed me some of the other planes and I watched some take off"
"Sounds like a great time"
"It was"
"Thank you skates"
"Anytime sir he is a fun little boy. Reminds me a lot of you and he has that look that you have when you watch a f-14 take off"
"Aviator in the making"
"I would have to agree sir. Same time tomorrow"
"Yeah if it's ok"
"Of course I'll see you tomorrow buddy"'
"Ok tanks"
"Your welcome"
"Bye Skates"
"Bye Sir"
Harm and Chris left the base and headed back to Navy Housing because they needed to get ready to go to Buds for dinner.
"Are we going to Buds tonight?"
"Yeah we are I just got to change out of my uniform"
"Ok daddy"
They arrived back at there living quarters around 6, Harm had twenty minutes to get ready. He took a quick shower while Chris played on his lap top. He got dressed in a pair of jeans and a white t shirt and then wore a black fitted jacket because it was getting cold out. He made sure Chris had hammer and then they left.
When he arrived everyone was already there because he was late again. No one was quite sure how to act around him and some were very surprised to see him walk in with a little boy, who had a striking resemblance to Harm, in his arms. It didn't take long for everyone to find out that Harm had a son.
Dinner was ready shortly after Harm arrived. Everyone sat around and talked except Harm did not say much, which was very unusual for him. He always has something to say. Everyone there noticed how different he was and they all wondered what had made him change.
Mac watched him intently trying to figure out who he was. It dawned on her that she really didn't know him anymore. In many ways he was still the same old Harm, but in other ways he was a total stranger.
After dinner they all went in the living room or the stayed in the dining area and talked.
Harm went in the living room and sat on the couch. Chris stayed with Harm the entire time. Usually Chris will go around and talk to people, but he sensed his father nervousness and stayed with him. He sat in Harm's lap and flew hammer around. Harm watched him and joined in the fun if no one was talking to him.
In the kitchen
"Hey Mac"
"Hey Sturgis I didn't even know you were here"
"Oh thanks"
"I'm sorry I have a lot on my mind"
"Did you see Harm?"
"Yeah why?"
"He seems different"
"Well he has a son and he has gone through a lot"
"Yeah I noticed the son, but he is so quiet"
"Well I don't know he hasn't said much to me either"
Harm walked up behind them "Mac"
"Yes"
"Here is the picture I almost forgot"
"Oh yeah thank you"
"Harm" said Sturgis"
"Sturgis"
"How have you been?"
"Good and you?"
"Good"
"I didn't even know you were here"
"Mac said that too, am I invisible?"
"I wasn't really paying attention to who was here, but Mac has no excuse"
"Hey that's not fair! Why do you get off so easy?"
"Because I am Harm"
"That's not a reason"
"Ok I'm going to leave you two to your madness"
"It is to a reason right Chris?"
"No when I say that I still get in trouble"
"Ha see he's on my side"
"Fine you win"
Mac smiled. "Thank you Chris"
"Your welcome" said Chris as he laughed at the two of them.
"So how is Chloe?"
"She is good. She should be up again. She misses you."
"I miss her too. I'll make sure to come down here when she is here to say hi"
"Ok"
"MAC!" Yelled Harriet.
"I'm being called."
"You better go help her Marine"
Mac went to see what Harriet needed and Harm went back to the living room.
"What Harriet?"
"Can you kill that spider?"
"Are you serious you called me to kill a spider. I thought you were like dying or something."
"I hate spiders and I was sure you could kill it"
"Where is it?"
"There." She said as she pointed at it.
"Ahh that is big. I need something to squish it with."
"Here use this shoe"
"Isn't that Bud's?"
"Yeah but just kill it!"
"Ok" Mac squished it and then threw it on the trash. "Is that all"
"No"
"What now"
"Harm"
"What about him?"
"Don't you think he looks good in that white t-shirt?"
"Harriet"
"Mac"
"Ok fine he does, but you're married."
"So he is looks good"
"I'm going back in the dinning room. Call me if you're attacked again"
"Ok"
Mac looked for Harm and found him back in the living room. No one really talked to him tonight other than the Admiral. Mac walked over and sat next to him.
"What did Harriet need?" He asked as soon as she sat down.
"For me to kill a spider"
"Spiders ew I'm glad she didn't call me"
"Who would have thought Harm afraid of spiders?"
"It's true"
Silence, with nothing left to make fun of each other for that is all that was left between Harm and Mac. After years of knowing exactly what the other was thinking now it was like they didn't know each other at all. Mac sat there for another minute and then got up and left him with Chris were he seemed most comfortable.
"Mac"
"Yeah Sturgis"
"What is going on with you two?"
"Nothing"
"That's just it"
"Don't worry about it everything is fine"
"No its not"
"Ok well maybe not"
"I suppose no one is going to tell me anything"
"Sorry I don't want to bury myself any deeper in this hole"
"Ok?" he said very confused as he watched her walk away.
Harm sat on the couch for a little while longer. No one really talked to him other than AJ because no one knew what to say. Most of his time there was spent thinking and watching Mac, who was obviously not enjoying her time here. Chris had fallen asleep in his lap so he decided it was time for him to leave. He picked him trying not to wake him and went to find Bud.
"Bud"
"Yes sir I mean Harm"
"I'm going to take off. I got to get him home"
"Ok then I'll see you tomorrow and thanks for coming"
"Thanks for having me."
"Bye sir"
"Bye"
Harm said good bye to Harriet and then headed home. Chris was still asleep when he got home.
Back at the party everyone felt bad because they weren't sure how to act around him. They felt bad for not saying a lot to him. He was different now and they all felt like they didn't know him anymore.
Mac sat in the living room staring out the window watching the rain begin to fall. She blamed herself for the way Harm was feeling; if she had only listened to him.
Two weeks later
The replacement had been found and Harm was heading back to Massachusetts in the morning.
"Chris"
"Yeah daddy"
"Do you have everything?"
"Yeah I'm gonna keep Hammer and Ralphie with me"
"Ok I'm going to put this in the car. I will be right back"
"Ok can I sit in front?"
"Yeah"
"Ok"
"I'll be right back"
"Ok I'm gonna draw a picture"
"Ok buddy"
Harm loaded up the car and then headed back up to Chris.
"Daddy"
"Yes"
"Can you play your guitar?"
"Sure"
Harm got his guitar and sat on the couch with Chris and played. Chris fell asleep and Harm put his guitar on the floor. He laid down on the couch and fell asleep with Chris in his arms.
Mac needed to talk to Harm before he left. It was only nine thirty and she figured he would still be awake. When she got there his door was open a little. "Harm Harm Harm what if I was a burglar." She said to herself. She walked in quietly so she would not wake up Chris or scare Harm. The light in the living room was on and she walked over towards it. She walked around the corner and saw father and son sleeping on the couch. A smile crept across her face as she watched him. They looked so cute. They were a great pair. His guitar was on the floor next to the couch. Hammer the plane and Ralphie that bear were on the table silently watching them sleep. She wasn't sure why this image made her so happy, but it did.
Harm's eyes fluttered open and he woke up slowly. He shifted himself making sure not to wake up Chris that's when he saw Mac.
"Mac hi" he said sleepily.
"Hi I'm sorry I didn't know you would be sleeping. I can leave."
"No you don't have to just let me put him in bed"
"Ok"
"Have a seat" He said as he cradled Chris in his arms making his way to the bedroom. He came back a few minutes later. "What can I do for you Mac?"
"Umm"
"Are you ok?"
"Yeah I am fine just not used to seeing you in sweatpants and a hoodie."
"Hey you walked in my house while I was sleeping."
"I'm sorry but Harm in sweats"
"Shut up wait till you have a kid."
"Poor Harm is tired"
"Yeah he wakes me up at five o'clock every morning. He wants to go see the marines"
"A Jar Head in the making"
"Yeah like I would let happen. Anyways I'm sure you didn't come over here just to make fun of me"
"No I came to apologize"
"Ok you lost me for what?"
"For what happened before you left."
"Don't Mac"
"It is my fault that you are so left out here and that no one knows what to say to you."
"Mac don't. I am glad for everything that happened after that night"
"What. I basically ruined your life here"
"No if you had not said everything you said then I would not have Chris"
"But"
"No I don't regret anything well almost but that is not the point you should not blame yourself. I did what I had to do and I am sorry that I had to do but it is my fault that no one here knows me anymore. I have a wonderful son and I love him more than anything. I could not imagine my life with out him. I am nothing without him." A tear ran down Mac's face. "Don't cry please. Everything happens for a reason. I did what I had to do and you did what you had to do. I hate being an outcast here, but I would not go back and change anything that happened except maybe when I broke my arm."
Mac laughed at his last statement. "Good I made you smile. You look so pretty when you smile."
"That was so random"
"I'm sorry but I hated when I broke my arm."
"And how did you do that?"
"I was drunk and fell down some stairs. That's when I met Kelly. She dragged my drunken broken ass to the hospital."
"Drunk?"
"Yeah I drank a lot when I first went up there"
"Oh"
"I don't drink anymore not even casually"
"That's good"
"I stopped when I fond out that Kelly was pregnant and I realized three was more to live for."
"I see"
"Chris is everything to me"
"That is obvious to everyone and I am sorry for how they act around you"
"Mac it isn't your fault. They are mad at me and I understand why. If I were in there shoes I would be mad too. There is no way for any of them to understand why I did what I did."
"DADDY!"
Harm ran into the bedroom with out a moment's hesitation. Chris was crying and shaking. "What's wrong buddy?"
"I had a bad dream that you left and you were never coming back"
"It's ok come here" Harm scooped Chris up into his lap and held him tight. "I would never leave you I promise"
Chris' tiny body clung to his father for dear life. Even after he had fallen back a sleep he would not let go of Harm. Harm walked back in the living room with Chris in his arms.
"Everything ok?"
"Yeah just a bad dream"
"I should go its getting late."
"Ok but you don't have to"
"No I should you have a long drive a head of you."
"Ok then"
"Bye"
"Mac get your six over here and give me a hug." Mac smiled and gave him a hug.
"Keep in touch fly boy"
"I'll try"
"I understand either way"
"Thank you
"Bye Harm and tell Chris I said bye"
"Bye Mac and I'll tell him."
Harm and Chris got up early and left. Harm had really only said good bye to Mac other than the quick good byes at work. He knew they would be mad at him for just leaving, but if he went back he wasn't sire if he could walk of from them or Mac again. He thought that he had moved on from Mac, but seeing her again brought all the feelings back to the surface. He couldn't do it all over again; their relationship was too complicated. He had to face the fact that it would never work between them. On top of all the pain he missed Kelly more than anything; even after two years it hurt just as bad to be alone. He just needed to go he told himself get on the road and forget everything.
Chris was wide awake by the time Harm was all set to go. Harm went through a mental list of things he had to do before he left and he was done with all of them.
"Daddy"
"That's what I forgot the little jar head I knew I was forgetting something" he said as Chris came out of the living room.
Chris laughed at him not fully understanding what he said. "Here you almost forgot Ralphie"
"I would never leave him behind. You ready to go"
"Yeah"
"Ok then we're off. Do you have Hammer?"
"Right here"
"Good wouldn't want to forget him"
Harm took Chris' hand and they walked to the car. Harm put a few things in the back and checked to make sure everything was in place. Chris got in the front seat and waited for Harm. Harm got in and they were off. He paused at the entrance for a second contemplating whether he should turn left and go to the JAG HQ and said goodbye. 'No it's not worth the pain' he said to himself and turned right and headed North to his home.