Author's note - I should have introduced myself earlier, with my first story, but I didn't think of it! Just a note about my stories, and what to expect from them.
I don't write anything with explicit language or themes. I do not write slash, and I do not write any language that we wouldn't hear on the show. My stories are also complete when I post them, because I personally hate waiting between chapters, so I don't feel the need to make others wait either!
I hope you enjoy my efforts.
PrairieLily
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Title - Breaking Up is Hard to Do
Rating - T, for mild language
Disclaimer - McGee, Abby, Palmer, Ducky, and Gibbs are not my characters. Jasmine is my creation.
Summary - Palmer finds himself in the middle of a spat between Abby and McGee
Level of completion - Done like dinner!
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Timothy McGee stood at the range, goggles on and ears protected, waiting for the go-ahead to commence firing. He popped the clip into his weapon with a satisfying snap, and glared at the target in front of him.
Palmer.
What he wouldn't love to do to that little twerp in the gym.
He'd have him for lunch, then spit out the leftovers.
Yeah, that'd be sweet. Pin him to the mat and hold him there until he cried Uncle, and then, maybe then, he'd think about letting him up off the floor.
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Earlier, in the lab
Abby glared at McGee. It didn't take much for him to piss her off these days. They had just reverted to "off-again" the previous week and they were both still feeling a little testy with each other.
Abby's usual sharp tongue cut McGee like a knife, but he had learned not to take what she said to him during these moments of annoyance to heart, and had learned himself, the most effective way to fire the acerbic retorts back at her.
At the moment, they were giving each other the silent treatment, having reached a stalemate. They spoke to each only when someone else was in the lab, and a more professional sort of behaviour was called for.
Gibbs tried to ignore their attitudes, because for the moment, at least, it wasn't affecting their work.
But the moment their little spat started to cut in on the quality of their job performance, he'd roll their heads faster than they could blink.
McGee looked up as Palmer entered the lab, with evidence jars in hand. Palmer looked around nervously, recognizing all too well the look of "give me an excuse" that he was receiving from McGee. Abby seemed smug, realizing the animosity that McGee sometimes harboured towards young Palmer. Suddenly, she was struck with an inspiration.
If this didn't pick McGee's ass, nothing would.
Anyway, maybe Palmer might surprise her. Who knew what tiger lurked beneath the lamb's exterior?
She was an adventurous woman. She was certainly willing to find out.
"Hey Jimmy," she said sweetly, "What are you doing tomorrow night?" McGee's eyes narrowed at her slightly. He knew exactly what she was up to. The trick would be to not show any reaction. Well, minimal reaction. Okay… so the trick would be to not kill Palmer on the spot.
"Uhhhh…" Palmer stammered. He looked nervously at McGee. Here was a spot he never expected to find himself in, in a million years.
On the one hand, his crush on Abby was hardly a secret. Being asked out by her was something of a fantasy come true. He should, for all intents and purposes, be ecstatic.
On the other hand, he had already seen the wrong side of McGee's temper. Granted, physical confrontation wasn't necessarily one of Timothy McGee's stronger qualities, but when it came to hand-to-hand combat, Palmer knew that he was no match for the bigger man.
Palmer rather liked his anatomy to remain right where God had intended it to be all along. Anyway, he hated to be the one to make Ducky have to assemble another meat puzzle.
Finally, he decided to suck it up. If he died having Abby ask him out, it wasn't such a futile death, was it?
"Nothing really planned, Abby. Why?" Palmer wasn't sure but he could almost swear later on, when he thought back on it, that he heard McGee growl.
"I've got tickets to this concert," she said. "And I had plans for dinner first, and some clubbing afterwards. You game, Jimmy?" she asked, sidling up to him.
McGee decided he'd better get the hell out of Dodge, before he did something he'd hate himself for in the morning.
He turned on his heel, and walked out.
Abby glared at the closing lab doors smugly, then turned her attention to Palmer. "Well?" she asked expectantly.
Palmer cleared his throat. "Sure, why not?" he finally said, smiling weakly.
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McGee tried not to stew too long over the incident in the lab. After he had vented his frustrations at the range, and realized that too many of his shots were a little too far south of the chest area, he decided that perhaps his time was better spent elsewhere.
He sat at his desk in the squad room. When he really thought about it, he realized how ridiculous it was to be possessive over a girlfriend who wasn't even his girlfriend any more.
Even though, that had never stopped said girlfriend from being possessive over a boyfriend - namely, him - when he wasn't even her boyfriend any more.
Well, what was good for the goose, was good for the gander.
Then, he was struck with an idea.
He knew who he could take to that concert.
Someone he knew almost better than he knew himself. And Abby really knew only the barest of details about her anyway.
He grinned to himself, green eyes alight with diabolical glee, then picked up the phone.
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"McGee, are you freakin' nuts?" Abby asked him, rolling her eyes.
"Maybe. Maybe not. But as a gesture of good will towards Palmer, I'd like to show him that I harbour no ill will against him for going on a date with you when our relationship isn't even cold in the grave yet. It's a free country and you're a free woman. You can do whatever the hell you want. I don't really care."
Abby wasn't buying that for a second.
"So let me get this straight, McGee. You want to double date with me and Palmer?" McGee smiled sweetly at her. "My, my. You do get it. Yes, that's exactly what I want. I'd love for you to meet Jasmine. She's a very special young woman."
Abby sneered at him. "How young, McGee? You been taking lessons from Tony or something? Can she at least vote?"
"I assure you, she's over 21. She can drive, she can vote, she can legally get into a club."
Abby thought a moment. She knew that McGee wasn't as resilient as this, and knew that seeing her with Palmer would definitely stick in his craw. That alone would make it worth the trouble.
"Fine then. Dinner is at 6:00. Meet you there. Don't be late."
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Palmer stood in front of his mirror. He squinted at his own reflection, considering if he really did need his glasses or not. Finally, he opted to keep them. It might avoid some awkward moments.
He thought about Abby. He really liked her, but even he had to admit, sometimes her attitude left much to be desired. No wonder McGee couldn't seem to make a decision about her.
Well, he'd give it a shot tonight anyway. This was her idea, after all, not his. If nothing else came of it, that'd be okay. Perhaps he'd see a side of Abby that would solidify his feelings for her one way or the other. Hey, tonight could be a definitive moment for him.
He checked his watch, then turned and walked out of his bedroom. He adjusted his hair one last time, at the mirror by the front door, then left the apartment.
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The silences seemed awkward.
Maybe it was just the lingering tension between Abby and McGee.
Jasmine didn't seem to be bothered by it. In fact, she seemed to take it in stride.
How long had McGee known her, anyway? They acted like they'd known each other, well, forever.
Abby was unusually subdued. She sensed the closeness between McGee and this woman too. She didn't like it in the least. It was cutting into her satisfaction at rubbing McGee's nose in Palmer's presence.
Palmer himself was unsure about Abby tonight. Maybe his mind's-eye had romanticised Abby somewhat. She wasn't really what he expected. In fact, he wasn't really sure if he wanted to persue a second date with her. He felt, at the same time, both disappointment, and relief.
Maybe it was just McGee's odd presence. Or maybe Abby was like this all the time, when she was in a vindictive mood. Which seemed to be all the time, of late.
So he did what he could with it. He turned to Jasmine.
"So, you say you're from…?" he asked her. McGee smiled ever so slightly, something that was not lost on Abby.
Jasmine smiled sweetly. "Same town as Tim. I've known him my whole life. It's been great having an excuse to come visit him."
Abby glared at her, firing visual daggers. McGee sat back, smiling smugly to himself.
"Oh?" Palmer said. "I understand you have an interest in medicine?" Jasmine smiled at him again. Damn, this guy was cute. Smart, too. And a fellow med-student. Why hadn't Timmy told her about this guy before, anyway? She might have to give him hell for that later. She could see herself going out with this guy again. And again. And again…
"Yeah, I'm actually in my second year of pre-med," she said, picking up her drink and sipping delicately. "I'm working as a paramedic while I do that." Abby rolled her eyes, moving her lips ever so slightly, silently repeating in a mocking manner, "I'm working as a paramedic." McGee cleared his throat to suppress a laugh.
"What's so funny, McGee?" Abby said to him suddenly. McGee shook his head. "Nothing, why do you ask?"
Abby scowled at him. He held back an urge to stick out his tongue at her.
"I have to go make a call," McGee said, suddenly. Oh no, Abby thought. You're not getting away that easily.
"You're such a jerk," she hissed at him, away from the table.
"I'm a jerk? Who asked that little pipsqueak out on a date right in front of her ex, less than a week after we broke up? Sometimes I swear your sensitivity is buried deep in your big toe."
"Well, I wouldn't have done that if you weren't such a…"
"Jerk. I know. You've covered that." McGee levelled a steady neutral look at her.
"Maybe I wouldn't be such a jerk if you could make a decision about us one way or the other, Abby. You know I'm not like most guys you've dated. I'm not allergic to commitment. I'm not scared of the "L" word."
"Well, then, why the hell don't you ever SAY the "L" word?" she cried, frustrated beyond all reason.
"Because the last time I tried to tell you how I felt, you ditched me faster than I could blink, that's why!"
Abby looked up at him. Damnit, he had a point. She really really hated when he did that.
She glanced over at the table. Palmer and Jasmine seemed to be getting a little bit cozy.
"Look at that," she said. "Your date stole my date." McGee grinned. "Yeah. Cool, isn't it?" McGee didn't really hate Palmer. Unless he started sniffing around Abby, that is.
Abby looked up at him, trying to suppress a smile. Finally, she gave up. "We're both jerks, aren't we Timmy?" McGee sighed and nodded. "I'm willing to make amends if you are," he said. Abby smiled at him, this time not even trying to stop it. "Why not. C'mere you big jerk," she said, reaching up and pulling his face down to meet hers.
Ah, the fights might be grand, but the making up part… was just the sweetest thing.
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McGee and Abby returned to their table, hand in hand, fingers interlocked. Jasmine looked up and grinned broadly.
"Hey Timmy. About time," she said, winking. Abby looked up at him, confused.
Jimmy looked up as well, not sure what to think. He and Jasmine had just been ditched. Not that he really minded, if he thought about it. He was really digging Jasmine, and he wasn't sure, but he thought maybe she was digging him, too. Anyway, he had to work with both Abby and McGee. If they were happy, everyone was happy.
And his anatomy had nothing to worry over… and Ducky didn't have to worry about unnecessary caseloads.
McGee cleared his throat. "Abby, I know you've met Jasmine. But I don't think you know the whole truth about her." Jasmine looked over at Abby and winked.
"You know how we've been having fun, but not really, you know, close, like you'd expect two people on a date to be?" Abby frowned. She hadn't realized it until now, but he was right. Something was definitely hinky there.
"Meet Jasmine McGee. My baby sister. Palmer, have her back at my apartment by midnight or you're a dead man. You know I can kill you. Don't mess with a big brother."
Palmer laughed in spite of himself. He was so relieved he couldn't believe it.
The date with Abby hadn't turned out like he'd expected. But Jasmine… well, not only was she not spoken for by McGee, but she was his sister. He got along fine with McGee when Abby wasn't in the picture. And Jasmine shared common interests with him. Including the interest of going out on another date…
He'd have to remember to thank McGee and Abby later for this. He couldn't put his finger on it, but he had a feeling about Jasmine.
"I will have her back before midnight, Agent McGee," Palmer solemnly promised.
Abby and McGee smiled at each other. "On second though, Palmer… take your time. In fact, I'm sure she can sleep in your spare bedroom. No need to drive all the way across town, out of your way, just to bring Jazzy home." Palmer grinned, and Jasmine giggled. McGee broke his gaze with Abby and looked squarely at Palmer, his previous burning animosity now replaced by a friendly sparkle in his eyes. "But I will be dusting my sister for fingerprints in the morning. Just so you know." He winked at them as Abby giggled, then took McGee by the hand and dragged him out of the restaurant, and to his car.