Disclaimer: Wish I did but I do not own the Saiyuki Boys or any other Saiyuki related character. I just own this fic.

Warning: Gojyo's body part and related apparel

While You Were Sleeping

It was a quiet, uneventful evening. Sanzo smoked a cigarette; Goku was hungry; Gojyo dreamed of bobbing breasts and Hakkai maa maaed away at all provocation. Nothing portended any change until it was time to brush their teeth and go to bed. But fate wouldn't let them off with a much deserved restful evening. This time, instead of the usual hoard of self proclaiming physically and intellectually superior youkais--who should know better than to run bare handed and in t-shirts and shorts into exorcising guns, chains with a scythe at one end, an elongating stick and blasts equivalent to nuclear explosions-- a one man(?) replacement, cunning and equipped with only a miniscule weapon, was to wreak havoc on the unsuspecting foursome.

"There's only one room tonight at the inn Sanzo," said Hakkai in his perfectly level tone. "I'm afraid we're all sleeping together in this room."

"Ahh......" Sighed Sanzo. He took a deep drag of smoke and stared out the window.

"Yay! We're bunking together." That ejaculation was from Goku. He intercepted Gojyo as he was about to go to the bathroom and two grappling with each other ---until Sanzo walked over and ended matters, quickly and effectively as usual.

"Maa maa," sweatdropped Hakkai.

After hours of preparation for bed which included drawing straws for who should get bathroom privileges first, a game of twister for who should sleep on the bed and all around wrestling matches over who should get bathroom privileges and the bed since everyone agreed that violence was the only way to ensure fair play, peace followed and soon, the sound of rumbling reverberated throughout the room like a giant chainsaw, courtesy of Goku and Gojyo in somnial cacophony. Sanzo's hand kept twitching for his gun.

Suddenly, without warning, the enemy struck.

First target: Gojyo. With razar sharp accuracy and precision, it alighted on Goiyo's forearm, aimed its weapon, braced its superbly aerodynamic body, pierced the delicate skin and...................sucked............................his.......................................blood.

Gojyo had no chance. Possibly because he felt nothing. So subtle was the attack that during the whole process, Gojyo even used the same arm to scratch one side of his sculpted rear with the enemy still attached.

Next target: Goku. The enemy, a little heavier now alighted on an exposed and delectable looking thigh. As it did with Gojyo, with great subterfuge, it struck the target without giving him a chance to fight back. Goku just mumbled in his sleep and dreamed of spooning out the inside of a red water melon.

Next target: Hakkai. The enemy was weary now. But two more targets awaited punishment from his 'sword.' And if anything, it would accomplish its mission or die trying. It forced its wings to carry itself to the target's neck and began operation. Ha! How fortuitous. By the texture, composition and overall sanguinity of this blood, its recognized a rare concoction of type A and type B. Good soldiers were always rewarded in this way. The enemy sucked and sucked.

Finally, the final target. Dragging its blood-laden body, the enemy tried to find a good area of landing place. It seemed that this target was hardest to infiltrate. The covers were flung over every advantageous landing space and the only exposed part was the upper region of the face. It alighted on the highest point and aimed.

Sanzo couldn't sleep. Apart from sharing a room with his 'servants,' two of them snored loudly enough to rattle his brain . He covered his head with the blanket but found he couldn't breath. He had to at the least let his nose through. He tried to fall sleep and almost succeeded until he heard a whirring sound, distant at first, piercingly clear and then alarmingly near. He shot open his eyes.

The enemy had infiltrated last target. After completion of this mission, it would ask for leave to visit the nearest swamp, find a mate and spawn a couple of hundred offspring to form its own platoon. It got ready to take off-- but found itself staring up at two giant, purple orbs. Then a flash of silver and a deafening blast and.......

.....Gojyo felt something hot slice across his shapely butt, tearing through his much laundered, one of a kind, beloved leotard. He leapt up and stepped on...

.....Goku was blissfully dreaming of cheese when a foot slammed into his mouth. He gagged and rolled over onto...

.....Hakkai scratched his neck. Maa maa, it was itchy. Greatly agitated he was about to get up when he was assaulted by what he believed was youkai. He gathered his Ki and aimed at...

.....Sanzo had never been so alarmed in his life. To wake up to face those beady eyes, the long, sharp, red nose. They reminded him of his Aunt Edna or would have if he had an Aunt Edna. In any case, his reaction was to shoot wildly.

The enemy barely made a get away through the open window. From what it could hear, there was a battle going on in that room with a succession of those deafening blasts, screams of pain and demands for compensation for torn underwear.

But let that battle wage on. It had won the war.