"Welcome to the Avengers, Peter Parker. Spiderman, am I correct?"
"U-Uh...Yes sir! And you-y-you're Iron Man!"
"Call me Tony."
"Yes sir!"
"And don't call me sir; it makes me feel like a general. Ick."
"Um, uh, yes s-Tony."
"That wasn't so hard wasn't it?"
"N-no, not really..."
"Ah! I sense that you want to ask a question!"
"..."
"Fire away, kid. I can answer almost any questi-"
"CanIpleasehaveyourautograph?"
...
"What."
"Can I have your autograph? Please please please, pretty please with-"
"Okay, okay. You can have your autograph. Now, do you have a piece of pa-"
"Here."
"...Well then. To Mr. Peter Parker, may you have the spiderest life ever. Would you like Iron Man or-"
"Both."
"From Iron Man, slash, Tony Stark. Here you go kid. Hope you like it."
"I will cherish it with my heart and soul."
"You go do that."
"I will never wash my hand again."
"..."
"Oh god, my hand touched Tony Stark's."
"Peter, are you okay?"
"OH MY GOD, TONY STARK TOUCHED MY FOREHEAD."
"Uh..."
"I AM NEVER WASHING THIS HEAD AGAIN."
"Peter-"
"TONY STARK JUST SAID MY NAME. OH MY GOD."
"Er..."
"AHHHHHHHH!"
Thud.
"Tony? I just heard something from - what the hell is that?"
"I had nothing to do with this, I swear."
"Is that the new kid?"
"Yes Steve."
"Oh god."
"'Oh god' indeed. Do you realize what just happened?"
"What?"
"I just killed Spiderman."
"..."
"This'll be all over the news tomorrow. Or tonight. With my luck, probably tonight. Definitely tonight."
"Oh Tony."
"I know. What a tragedy."
"Aw, you're being senti-"
"I mean, this is going to be horrible for my reputation! Can you just imagine what it'd be like?"
"Just ignore what I just said."
"What?"
"...Get him over here. I'll get him to the clinic."
"What were you going to say?"
"Absolutely nothing, Tony. Just keep your mouth shut for the rest of the decade. Please."
A/N: Simply because I was bored, and simply because I was bored enough. Fanboy!Peter always gets to me, though. I mean, he was such a nerd and a total awkward dork. He was my first superhero crush, so now I give him a superhero crush on my superhero crush NOW. Which happened to be Tony Stark, so...also, Steve. :3