"Stephano... I think we've lost him." Mr. Chair announced quietly, green eyes watching the lantern flicker lower and lower as time spent searching ticked by.
"No, really? God damn Mr. Chair, you are really good at pointing out the obvious, aren't you?" Stephano replied, turning back to glance at the petit brunet.
"Lay off, Stephano. We're all tired and he probably wants to go to bed. What if Pewdie just left for the night?" Piggeh growled, jabbing Stephano in the ankle with his hoof.
Stephano looked down and rolled his eyes, kicking the rotting pig halfway down the corridor. Piggeh landed with a fleshy 'plth' and rolled over, stopping for a moment before transforming back to his human form.
"Stephano? What the actual fuck?" He growled angrily, charging at full speed towards the golden man.
Stephano sidestepped him, allowing him to slam right into an unsuspecting chair-human.
"OW! Guys, please stop!" Mr. Chair whined, grabbing at his ribs.
Piggeh rolled off of him and helped him up, now boiling with rage.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Chair." He said, putting his hands on Mr. Chair's shoulders. "Are you alright?"
Mr. Chair nodded, and Piggeh turned to face Stephano.
"Why you gotta be such a bastard all the time?" Piggeh asked, flailing bandaged arms in frustration.
"Why you gotta be such a slutty moron all the time?" Returned Stephano, mocking the tone of Piggeh's voice.
"I will fucking trample you!"
"I will slice you into bite-sized porkchops!"
"I"ll melt you in the fireplace!"
"I will feed you to The Bro!"
"Go ahead. Try it. I dare ya, Goldie."
"Fucking bring it, Porky!"
Mr. Chair cringed as the two began throwing punches. Stephano kept his sword sheathed, so he knew that this was just another meaningless quarrel. The bros could only stay together for so long without fighting. Mr. Chair knew that the fight wouldn't get serious, but nonetheless he still longed for someone that was a pacifist like himself. He knew of a few people who weren't as violent and impulsive as Stephano, loud and in-your-face like Piggeh, or attention deficit and hyperactive as Pewdie.
He was snapped out of his thought by sudden shrill shrieks. Mr. Chair turned to his friends to see that neither of them had faltered, their fight hadn't skipped a beat.
"Bros!" Mr. Chair hissed, trying to get their attention.
More shrieks came from the ballroom down the corridor, yet the fight continued.
"Bros!"
Nothing.
"BROS! STOP IT!" Mr. Chair shouted, shoving the two apart.
"What?" Stephano hissed, still glaring at the pink-haired bro he had threatened to kill.
"Someone's in trouble!" Mr. Chair pointed out, just before more screaming was heard.
Stephano's eyes widened, rage suddenly gone.
"Pewdie!" He gasped, then took off down the corridor towards the ballroom.
Piggeh and Mr. Chair followed close behind, running in right behind him as he burst the door open. The grunt had cornered someone, eliciting screams of terror from them loud enough to wake the dead.
"Leave him alone!" Stephano growled, drawing his sword and getting into a defensive stance.
The Bro turned, reptilian eyes dull and emotionless. He let out a loud groan and came closer, limp leg dragging behind him. He raised his awful claws and lazily swung at Stephano, who easily blocked and took a stab at the beast's chest. The Bro growled and swung at Stephano again, but missed by almost a foot.
"This it too easy!" Stephano remarked, pulling his sword back out and watching as the bro sluggishly limped away.
"The fuck?" Piggeh huffed, turning to Stephano, who merely shrugged.
"It gave up?" Stephano guessed.
Mr. Chair turned to the corner to see a small teapot, shivering violently.
"Are you alright?" Mr. Chair asked, holding a hand out and lightly patting the small porcelain table piece.
The pot transformed into a man with hazel eyes, causing Mr. Chair to stumble and fall onto his back.
"I'm fine. Thank you." The man said, showcasing an English accent.
Mr. Chair couldn't help but stare. The man had hazel eyes and olive skin, with shoulder-length light brown hair tied back in a ponytail. He wasn't very muscled, but had a larger frame and bigger build. The vibe that the man gave off was strange. His voice was soft; almost hypnotizing.
"Allos, I am Stephano." Stephano greeted, kneeling on one knee. "You are?"
"Thomas." The tea pot introduced, taking Stephano's hand and giving it a shake.
"And these two gentlemen are?" Thomas asked, looking from Piggeh to Mr. Chair.
"The name's Percy. Call me Piggeh, though." Piggeh said, arms crossed over his chest.
"My name is Mr. Chair. Very nice to meet you." Mr. Chair said, smiling his sweet little smile.
Thomas smiled back then turned to address Stephano. "I'd like to thank you for defending me from the monster. I would have done so myself... but that really isn't my nature."
"Ah, it is not a problem. The Bro Army is a friend to all in need." Stephano said with a grin, giving Thomas a friendly pat on the shoulder.
Piggeh rolled his eyes at the cliche line, stepping forward and crouching in front of the peculiar brunet.
"So, what are ya? Not a barrel, are ya?" Piggeh questioned, getting a little to close to him.
Mr. Chair pulled him away, giving Piggeh a quick death glare.
"No, no. The barrels aren't my kind of people. Rather violent fellows, are they not?" Thomas replied, putting a hand up to retain space between himself and Piggeh.
Stephano scoffed. "Understatement of the fucking year, bro. Those sons of bitches make our lives total hell."
"Eh, Stephano? Might I ask that you refrain from such language? I find it a tad bit inappropriate." Thomas requested.
Stephano nodded, looking to Piggeh in disbelief. Piggeh rolled his eyes.
"So, Thomas, when did you get to Brennenburg?" Mr. Chair asked, changing subject.
"Well, it seems that I was kidnapped during my vacation. I've been her for about two weeks or so, but I have no way of being sure. I'v been trying to escape the clutches of evil, as until I met you kind chaps, I've only encountered brutes. One moment I was packing my bags to head back to Manchester and then the next everything went black. When I awoke, I was in terrible pain and somehow... able to take the peculiar form of a teapot?" He stated, saying the last part like a question.
"Yeah, that sounds about right." Mr. Chair sighed. "You're fine one moment, but then you end up cold, confused, scared, with a huge gash in your leg, and half chair." Mr. Chair added.
"So, Chair is not your surname?" Thomas inquired.
Mr. Chair halfheartedly laughed. "It is. I guess the barrels have a sick sense of humor, right?"
Thomas nodded.
"We should get you somewhere to rest up, no? I am sure you're very tired." Stephano cut in, holding back a yawn. "Merde, I myself am exhausted."
"I have a chamber already, thank you very much. I may have needed saving once, but I am not some helpless git." Thomas stated, an underlying cold tone barely hid by a lighthearted smile.
Stephano bit the inside of his cheek. "Well then, find us if you need us. We'll be patrolling for most of the night, so we'll be around." He sighed, standing up and offering a hand.
Thomas stood on his own and brushed the dust off of his trousers, then looked down at Mr. Chair, offering help up. Mr. Chair took his hand with a nod of thanks. Stephano pulled Piggeh up and then waited for someone to say something else.
"And perhaps you could come on an adventure or two with us?" Mr. Chair asked.
Thomas' face lit up. "Oh, yes. That would be splendid. Goodbye, now!" He chirped, rushing off abruptly before anyone could get another word in.
Mr. chair, Piggeh, and Stephano all began back down the corridor, all pondering the encounter. Mr. Chair found himself curious of the man, while Piggeh wasn't so sure, and Stephano just let it slip his mind. There were more important things to worry about. It wasn't too important, right?
A/N
Pocky: So, here's the deal. This story is gonna be (insert final number of chapters here) chapters long. I may or may not finish, depending on what you bros think. I don't know how many OCs are going to end up in here, so we'll just have to see. Alright, Stephano?
Stephano: Pocky's story uses characters, such as myself, owned by Pewdiepie. Piggeh, Mr. Chair, the other bros, and myself, are all property of Felix Kjellberg. She does not own us.
Pocky: Darn. *looks down* I do, however, own Thomas. Bwahahahahahahahaha!
Thomas: Ello, dearest bros! *waves*
Mr. Chair: *smiles and waves to all of you*
Piggeh: *winks at you bros* Yeh!~ *death glares at Thomas*
Pocky: Oh! Btw, I have no beta. I apologize in advance for mistakes in this story, or any others.
Stephano: Before Pocky forgets, a special thanks to zZzScytheWielderxXx! She's an ultra special bro that gave that cretine *points to Pocky* the idea for this story. Credit to her for the outline of this plot. *blows kiss to zZzScytheWielderxXx*
Pocky: STEPHANO!