Memories & Reality

This story is an origin story of Natasha & Steve's relationship in an alternate universe. Their worlds and lives intersect in an earlier life at the FBI Academy. It follows their journey and the consequences of their actions through the past to present day. Angst / Romance / Pain / AU.

I do not own any of this or any part of Marvel or the MCU

This is my first fanfic. I've enjoyed writing for a long time and found fanfiction a long time ago, so I finally decided to dip my toes in this universe that I love.

Chapter 1 - Remember

Present Day -

Steve stood in the kitchen of his apartment.

He was cleaning up after his dinner with his guests. He felt the tension in his shoulders as he finished loading the dishwasher and moved to wiping down the counters. As his hands circled over the same spot repeatedly, he was pulled away from his thoughts, "You don't have to clean up after us, Steve. We don't want to be a burden."

He lifted his eyes from the surface and took a deep breath. Dropping the rag on the counter, he shook his head and wiped a hand over his face. He was trying to be present. He really was. He gave a slight smile and turned around, "Not a big deal, Buck. I've been cleaning up after you our entire lives, what's one more night of it, right?"

When all else failed, resort to jokes and sarcasm.

"You know Steve, speaking of things that have been going on for our entire lives, it's good to see you can still be the little shit you always were. You're just not 'little' anymore," Bucky quickly answered.

Bucky laughed and smacked Steve lightly on the shoulder as he moved around him to put the leftover containers in the fridge. He closed the door and looked at his friend before continuing, "Seriously though, I appreciate you letting Wanda, Peter and me stay with you for a little while, but I don't want to interrupt your routine away from our job…or whatever it is you do here on your own all the time."

There it was. The slight hint of sorrow in Bucky's voice.

Steve clenched his jaw for a brief moment and let out a breath. He leaned back against the far counter and crossed his arms. "Buck, come on - don't start. You and Wanda and the little guy are moving to a new house, and need a place to crash for a bit. I would have been pissed if you wouldn't have asked. We work together, and now you and your family will be around me at night too which is great. But I don't need the worry from you – we have mom for that."

Bucky let out a small chuckle, "Well, she is the best at worrying about you."

"Oh, you're in that circle of constant worry too, Buck. Sarah Rogers doesn't discriminate," Steve answered.

Bucky laughed, "No amount of concern is too small for her Brooklyn Boys. But I've gotten a 'get out of jail free card' from her over last few years since tying the knot and giving her a grandchild to focus on – side perk of Wanda and I having Peter."

It was an innocent attempt at a light-hearted joke and nothing was meant it. Nothing at all.

Steven Grant Rogers and James Buchanan Barnes weren't brothers by blood, but were brothers nonetheless. They grew up as neighbors first, and then under the same roof when Sarah Rogers took James in at the age of five after his mother died in a car accident. Both men were born with the curse of horrible fathers. Both men grew up with the blessing of having Sarah bestow the love and devotion she did and still does in them. Both men were fortunate enough to have each other through childhood, their teenage years, their tours of duty in Afghanistan, and then their time to the present in the FBI.

Both men, for having such similar livelihoods were not living similar lives in present day though.

Bucky's path was one of light and hope and the way things should be. He married the woman he fell in love with while in the FBI, and now had a five-year old son named Peter with her.

Steve's path was one of just getting by and harsh realities. At work, it was hardly noticeable because Steve Rogers was damn good at his job, and could hide everything that was apparent right now through his hard work, his leadership, and pouring every ounce of himself into serving the FBI and his country.

It was hardly noticeable, but for those who knew him best, all it took was to be around him outside of work for a little while, like tonight. Bucky knew the time away from work that most people lived for, Steve now loathed. His thoughts were consumed by memories and shattered ideas of what should have been. So yes, the men that had been through everything together in their lives, found themselves on very different paths, but the brotherly love and friendship was still there.

So, when Bucky just mentioned jokingly that Sarah had Bucky, Wanda, and Peter to focus positive energy on as a grandmother, he really didn't mean anything by it. But he knew Steve's brain was diving down a rabbit hole of thoughts that consumed him when work couldn't. He knew that Steve started thinking to himself along the lines of, 'Well it's good Mom has you to feel positive about, because she can't feel that way about me.'

Worry crossed Bucky's eyes again as he looked at him. He wanted to change the subject because dinner had been active with Peter's five-year old antics. It had been a nice distraction for everyone, but for most importantly, Steve. So, he tried to lighten the tone again, "Come on Steve, I didn't mean anything by it. Peter gives our mom and all of us plenty to worry about – the kid's squirrelly behavior is going to be the death of all of us."

Steve smiled in a way that Bucky knew was placating him and shoving aside the undertones of their conversation, but it was better than nothing. He responded to Bucky, "I know Buck, no harm foul. Seriously, I'm really glad to have you, Wanda, and Peter here with me - for however long you need. It'll give me a chance to seriously up my Uncle Steve game."

But the worry in Bucky's eyes shifted to sorrow as he watched Steve leave the kitchen. Bucky sighed. It was night one and wanted to allow his friend his space, so he let Steve be and retreated to find his family down the hallway.

Steve poured himself a glass of whiskey and walked over to his living room window. It overlooked the twinkling lights of New York City. The lights mesmerized him as he stared out into the night. The amber liquid caused a slow burn down his throat as he heard Wanda, Bucky, and Peter's voices fading into the background in one of his spare bedrooms.

The edge of his eyes began to burn mildly as he continued to stare at those lights. He focused on a weather tower beacon in the distance as it blinked green tonight. His vision narrowed and he could only see blinking green anymore. His thoughts blurred, poking at a history he didn't want to visit tonight. He had kept his memories at bay during dinner, but as the green lights turned on and off in the distance, he fell into a trance as he spoke to himself following the pattern, 'Flash one, two, three…flash one, two, three.'

A vague memory of a weather rhyme from his childhood came to mind: 'Weather Beacon white as snow, down the temperature will go. Weather Beacon red as fire, temperature is going higher. Weather Beacon an emerald green, forecast says no change foreseen. When colors blink in agitation, there's going to be precipitation.'

'Weather Beacon an emerald green, forecast says no change foreseen.'

That line repeated in his head each time the blinking light reflected off of his eyes. The poking at his past that was occurring moments ago caused a crack. Suddenly a tidal wave of memories rushed in, and every attempt to keep the past where it was – in the past – was useless. He swallowed as thoughts flashed to another life. That tidal wave now flooded his senses with images of smooth skin, fiery passion, red hair, and emerald eyes.

He thought of her.

He remembered feeling the stare from those eyes, and now that image burned more in his mind than the scotch did in his throat just a moment ago. A warmth crept up his face as his memories continued their assault. Another flash of light. Another blink of green, and suddenly that warmth turned to pain and anger – it always did.

The anger and sorrow tainted those warm memories from long ago. Another 'Flash one, two, three,' and an overwhelming feeling took over as everything began to haunt him. He imagined her staring at him from the night sky, blinking along with each flash.

"Are you okay, Steve?"

He thought he was hallucinating.

Was he hearing voices?

He shook his head, and the trance was broken. He blinked a few times and rubbed his eyes. Snapping away from his memories, he was sucked from the rabbit hole he was falling down again. All of a sudden, he felt Wanda's hand on his shoulder. 'I may not be hearing voices, but damn if I don't feel a little crazy sometimes,' he thought to himself. Steve let out a soft laugh as he touched the cold glass on the window, realizing it was his sister-in-law who had just asked him if he was okay.

Compared to where he was a few seconds ago, his return to reality felt like being doused with ice water.

Trying to convince her everything was alright, Steve mumbled, "Yeah, just tired, Wanda." It wasn't the whole truth, or anywhere remotely close to it. But it wasn't a lie either. He was tired. And in a moment like this, he looked it and felt it, all the way to his bones.

Steve looked at her, and she briefly saw the swirl of emotions in his eyes. The pain, regret, sorrow, and anger – she'd seen it too many times. All of it. She knew those feelings and memories had momentarily infected him…again. Everything flickered away quickly though, when they both heard Peter laughing, and then yelling at his mom to come read him a bedtime story.

Wanda smiled and squeezed his shoulder, trying to show some comfort. "You know how much we love you, Steve. And you know how grateful we are for everything you do for the three of us, but I just worry sometimes you will never let go of the past. You deserve to be happy."

Still feeling chills from his snap back to the real world, Steve let out a large breath but didn't respond, so she let it go for the night. She gave him another warm smile before going to Peter's room and just said, "Get some rest, Steve. We all have a big day tomorrow and need it."

Steve downed the last of his drink in one gulp. He thought about having another but decided against it. His eyes moved one final time to that green light.

'Forecast says no change foreseen.'

He wiped the small beads of sweat from his hair line and rubbed his eyes again, trying to rid himself of the burn the light had caused. He tapped the window a couple times with his fist, ran his hand over his beard, and groaned to himself. Wanda was right. He needed to get to sleep. Tomorrow morning would come soon enough, and he had an earlier start than usual with the team. Reluctantly, he turned away and withdrew to his bedroom.

12 Years Ago –

It was the night before Steve's first day at the FBI Training Academy in Quantico, Virginia. He stared at the clock in his hotel room and saw it was 6:37 pm. "Damn," he sighed. He was both nervous and impatient for the morning to come. He just wanted it to start. Now. He tried watching TV and tried sketching in his book, but he was restless. He knew he'd drive himself mad if he stayed put for the rest of the night, so he decided instead to go for a run outside the hotel.

He was walking through the lobby in his sweats and saw a few people over by the bar, his brother being one of them.

"Steve, come over and meet everyone who's as crazy as us to be joining The Academy," Bucky yelled at him. Steve smiled and thought to himself, 'It's not even day one, and Buck already has a crowd of people around him.'

He walked over to Bucky while a man who stood by Barnes, stepped forward to shake his hand, "Hey man, name is Sam Wilson. You must be this guy's friend. Does that make you responsible for him?" Bucky faked being offended with a scoff, and Steve chuckled.

In one statement, he could tell this guy was going to be a welcome addition in his life. Steve said, "I can assure you, I take absolutely no responsibility over his words or actions."

Bucky tried to respond, "What the heck is going on here? I'm innoc…"

Sam cut him off though, "Don't worry, I've caught onto the fact that Barnes here is all smoke and no fire."

Steve smiled and responded, "He doesn't leave much to mystery, does he? Name is Steve. You here for the start of training tomorrow?"

"You bet. A bunch of us are just having a few drinks to relax and get to know one another. You should join us." Sam answered.

Bucky laughed, "All right, if you two are done having your fun at my expense…Come on Steve, kick back and have a couple. If anything, we can do a little digging through people's alcohol buzz and do some reconnaissance on our future classmates."

Steve rolled his eyes, "Thanks guys, but I'm going for a run. Trying to calm some nerves before the storm, you know?" Sam laughed and nodded, "You go running while we're all drinking – I can tell we're going to have to keep up with you."

Bucky added, "You have no idea, Wilson. Come on Steve, don't be a grandpa." Steve smacked his shoulder as he was taking a drink, almost causing Bucky to spit.

"Punk," Bucky laughed.

"Jerk," Steve answered, "This grandpa is going to run circles around you tomorrow, Buck. But I promise, I'll join next time."

Steve introduced himself to everyone else in the bar area. There was a Wanda, Loki, Tony, Maria, Thor, Bruce, Rhodey and a few other people that he'd have to work on remembering names and faces to later.

A few minutes later, he excused himself and left the lobby. He smiled as he heard everyone clinking their beers and laughing and thought to himself, 'Next time,' but right now he had to clear his head.

It was chilly outside, so Steve put his hood up when he started jogging towards the trail connected to the hotel parking lot. He adjusted to the air outside, and his nerves settled after a couple minutes into his run. He started thinking about everything that had led him to this point.

His thoughts travelled to his childhood with Bucky and getting into fights with neighborhood kids and classmates. They fought against jerks and bullies as kids, and lacking the money to consider other options of going onto college after high school, they signed up for the military to fight against jerks and bullies as American Soldiers.

It was deeper than that though. That was the simplified version they could joke about and tell people when they had to summarize their similar decisions in life. The synopsis of their life. The reality was somewhere in the mixture of the men who developed from unfair circumstances bestowed upon them as children.

An accident that stole Bucky's birth mother away, and a coward as an excuse for his father who left when he was born could have taught James Barnes that life was against him. That he could cheat his way through to try and get ahead because no one else could be relied on.

Illnesses that plagued Steve through his early years, and an abusive drunk of a father whose liver finally gave out causing his death when the boys were seven, could have taught Steve to be angry and bitter towards everything. It all could have caused him to repeat the cycle of violence and abuse like so many others fall prey to with similar points in their history.

But the difference in their lives is they had the example of each other. And most importantly, they had Sarah Rogers teaching them good in a world of bad, to trust and rely on one another, and that they always had a choice. No matter how dark it seemed at times, they always had a choice to try and do better.

Several minutes passed as Steve's pace increased along with his breathing. He saw a wooded area ahead to the left at a fork and took it. Feeling the beats of his steps, his mind shifted from his past to the present again as he focused on the morning and everyone he just met back in the hotel lobby and bar.

He took in his surroundings of overarching trees and could feel sweat forming at the base of his neck and his forehead. He took a second to look up at the stars and all of a sudden, he felt his body jolt forward. He slammed into something, and his body went tumbling to the ground. His hands braced his fall, but he scraped his palms as he went into the dirt on the side of the trail.

Steve yelled out, "What the hell?"

He stood up to turn around and see what he tripped over. He was shocked to see that it wasn't a something that he ran into, but a someone.

Steve shook his head and wiped the dirt off his sweats and hands as best he could. The sting from his scrapes quickly numbed as he walked over to the other hooded figure on the ground. He said, "Sorry man, I must not have been paying close enough attention to the road." Steve realized he was wrong again, for the second time in a minute.

This wasn't a something, and this wasn't a man.

He looked down as the person below him stood, revealing a petite and feminine form. She removed her hood as she wiped some dirt from her knees. She looked up to him, revealing her vivid green eyes, as she smiled and said, "Well this is the most painful run I've been on in a while."

Steve was speechless. He looked at her with his mouth slightly open. He tried to mumble out something but was unsuccessful. She ran her hands over her knees again from where she had fallen and said, "Hey, I was just kidding. I have a high pain tolerance, so no worries."

Steve noticed how her lean figure in her black running gear made her look like a silhouette in the moonlight. The color of her hair drew his eyes to her face. She shook out her ponytail and red locks fell down past her shoulder. She took a couple of leaves out of her hair and grinned at Steve's wordless face and said, "Name is Nadia. It's been nice…running into you." The playful tone finally snapped him out of his trance. He tried to appear calm even though he could feel his nerves firing on all cylinders as he responded, "Steve, name is Steve."

She smiled again at him, and those same nerves seemed to seep out of him as he felt tension in the air. His attempt of being calm was vanishing, so he took a deep breath. She continued, "So are you at the beginning or end of your route?" Finally finding words, he responded, "Uh, I'm not sure I guess. I didn't really have a plan tonight. I am just trying to burn off some energy and time before the morning."

She shook her head in agreement, "I always run at night. There's just something about it that makes me feel alone, but in control you know?" Hesitating for a moment, she continued, "So Steve, what's on your mind that's making you have too much energy?" They both began walking along the path together. He was on high alert and his senses took everything in. The chill in the air returned from before, but he felt warm. He could hear their soft footsteps hitting the ground. And he could smell a hint of his sweat mixed with dirt, the night air, and the scent of cinnamon from her hair.

It was like he drank three energy drinks, and they kicked in at the same time. He needed to snap out of this immediately if he was ever going to appear somewhat normal. "Sorry. Nadia, right? This is the part where I respond to you and act like this was a normal meeting between two people."

She looked up at him as he continued, "I'm starting in a training program tomorrow morning, and I just want it to be here. I hate waiting, and now it's like the anticipation is driving me crazy. So, I needed to get out and run some of it off. Am I making any sense?" Steve started to feel more like himself as she answered, "Complete sense. Anticipation can be…unpleasant at times. It's good to keep your body and mind busy."

They both relaxed and found their conversation flowing smoothly as they continued to walk beneath the night sky. He asked what she was here for, and she said she was in town visiting some people. She asked what his training was for that had him so nervous. He corrected her, he told her he was more excited than nervous and confessed it was for the FBI training program. She joked and acted serious at his confession, "Are you going to arrest me for obstruction of the running path?"

He laughed, "You know, I'm not aware of that specific violation. So, I'll let it slide…just this once."

There was a pause after ten minutes of walking and talking, and Steve felt the tension between them return. His pulse increased a little as she stopped walking. She turned her head to look into his eyes and raised her hand to his cheek. Her thumb grazed his skin. That tension turned to electricity because they both felt a spark at the contact. Her lips curved into a smirk, and she moved her hand to the side of his head. She pulled a small piece of grass from his hair from when he fell and said, "Souvenir to remember me by I guess."

She moved to give the blade to Steve, and he finally felt some confidence form as his lips curved upward. His hand lingered at the contact. His fingers moved against her palm as if he was reading it, and saw goosebumps appear on her forearm.

'Thank God I'm not the only one feeling this,' he thought to himself.

He picked up the grass and broke the silence, "I'll have to keep this as evidence from our crash." They stood there in the quiet, and his gaze drew from her arm to meet her eyes. It felt like minutes passed, but in reality it was only seconds. She looked away briefly and bit her lower lip as she said, "I guess this is it." Steve wasn't sure what she meant. He was breathing nervously and saw her doing the same. His mind raced at the thought of kissing her.

"What?" Steve started to respond.

"I guess this is it," Nadia said again. She pointed at the hotel sign, and Steve realized she was talking about their walk being done because they were back at his hotel. "Yeah, I guess it is," he said as she smiled, "It was really nice…bumping into you tonight, Steve."

He could feel his Adam's apple moving and the saliva forming in the back of his throat as the buzz in the air picked up. Steve realized he didn't like the thought of parting ways so soon. He tried to continue the conversation a little longer, "It was the best run I've had in a long time." A nervous laugh escaped her lips as she nodded her head. She raised her hand to give a single wave as she turned and started walking back on the path. All he could think of was how he missed her already.

'How is it possible I could miss someone I met only 30 minutes ago?' Ugh.

He was speaking to himself again. He might not have a clear answer to the question, but he knew he didn't like the feeling of her turning away. His courage from before turned into determination to make their 'run-in' last a little longer.

"Coffee?" Steve blurted out. Nadia turned around with her lips curved as she watched this handsome, broad shouldered man be reduced to a single word vocabulary.

"Coffee? Yeah, it's…it's something, isn't it?", she responded. Steve shook his head and got a grip, "No, I mean coffee. As in, would you like to grab some with me? I'm not ready to hit the hay yet, and I'd like to continue our conversation…If you want."

She looked at him for a second and shrugged her shoulders, "Sure, I like coffee too, Steve. Just promise me you won't run me over when I'm holding a hot cup though. Blades of grass, leaves, and dirt are a lot easier to shake off than burning liquid." Steve relaxed and laughed, jabbing back at her, "Hey I think I got banged up a little worse than you did Nadia, but I promise. I'll be careful around you."

They walked across the street to a coffee shop that was still open. It was empty inside as they both ordered their drinks. They both ordered black, regular house coffee and smiled at each other, noticing the similar tastes. Steve said, "No need to dress something up when it's great the way it is."

She nodded in agreement as she tried to figure out where to sit. They found a corner booth, so they could have some privacy from the teenager working the counter. A teenager who actually didn't seem to care at all about them and went in the back and began watching TV. They were alone.

Steve sat on one end of the corner booth and Nadia was at the other end. As they started to drink, the warm liquid seemed to calm them both. Their fluid conversation from before started back up again. Nadia talked about random topics like the music playing in the coffee shop and some friends she planned on seeing while she was here. Steve talked about his two tours of duty and how the form of law enforcement he was joining tomorrow just seemed to fit. He talked about Brooklyn and about his Mom and Bucky. Nadia saw the light in his eyes and heard the love through his words and said, "Family is everything." Steve agreed.

They had been talking for over an hour, and their bodies had slid closer together in the booth. Their thighs were almost touching.

The electricity that seemed to dissipate over the last hour through conversation, returned as they both looked down at their close proximity. They stopped speaking as their eyes met, and it was like two hot wires coming close together.

The spark was there again, and it was palpable.

He looked down to her lips as her breathing became heavier. She returned the glances at him and everything stilled around them. This dance between their eyes continued for several seconds until Steve broke through the fog.

He reached down and grabbed her left hand with his right and felt warmth spread up his arm and into his chest. For the second time tonight since they met, she grazed his cheek with her fingers. She leaned in close enough to smell his aftershave and deodorant. Mirroring her, he cupped her cheek and that scent from before, cinnamon, mixed with coffee and each other's sweat, was enough to make him feel intoxicated.

This build between them should not have felt as drawn out as it did. They hadn't even been in each other's orbit for a full evening. But sparks and attraction, and lust if they were being completely honest, don't require lengths of time to form. All of it was there instantly, and the connection formed in their conversations only enhanced everything. So, even though it had only been a couple of hours, it felt much longer to get to the breaking point where one of them finally acted.

Not being able to hold back any longer, Steve leaned down and found her lips.

A soft moan escaped from the back of her throat as she felt his mouth on her. He pulled back for just a moment when he heard her to look at her. Maybe it was to see if this was okay. Maybe it was because he needed another second to collect himself…because sounds like that were going to drive him mad. Looking in her eyes, he saw the desire he felt and watched as her pupils darkened.

The first kiss was tentative. The second one was fearless.

It quickly deepened, and he responded with a low groan. Circling around her waist, he pulled her closer so their bodies were pressed against one another. Torsos twisted and chests turned in the booth, but there was nothing awkward about it as his mouth pushed hard against hers. He buried his free hand in her thick hair and closed any remaining distance between them sitting how they were.

She moved her hand to Steve's upper body. Anyone could have seen how strong he appeared at first glance. You would have to be blind not to notice. But being this close to him, having her fingers linger against his chest, and only having his clothing separating the feel of his skin from her, well this was something entirely different. She could feel the muscles tense under her touch as a warmth radiated between them. Her hand skimmed upward until her fingertips were grazing the bare skin on his neck.

His grip tightened around her tiny waist as her lips parted, granting him access to her entrance. She became overwhelmed at the feeling of his warmth, his grip, his lips, the feeling of his tongue against hers.

All of it.

She pulled back and looked over his shoulder for a second. The next moment happened so fast that he didn't even blink before their positions changed. She moved her legs toward him and lifted herself up to straddle him. Her hips pressed flush against his stomach, and her ass drove down into his thighs as he let out a louder groan than before.

"God, Nadia," he whispered.

He didn't know if a rational Nadia would act like this, but he knew a rational minded Steve Rogers would not be making out and groping a woman he just met in a coffee shop. And all the night before he began his training for the FBI. His mother would smack him upside the head if she saw him. Bucky would buy him a shot and encourage him. But the idea of being rational was fleeting and was gone in a second. He was having trouble thinking clearly as he stared at her.

She gave him a devilish grin to indicate they were still alone and spoke into his ear, "Just us still."

He could feel heat coming off of her, both from her body and from her thighs surrounding him. He wrapped both arms around her now, spreading his fingers across her hips and lower back.

She felt his grip harden as she moved her lips to his neck.

Their chests were heaving and their breath felt hot against each other's skin. He could feel a warmth form between her legs, and she felt his growing reaction beneath her. She moved away from his neck and looked straight into his eyes. She wanted to see the response she elicited from him.

Biting her lip, she rolled her hips down and pushed into him.

He could feel a grunt in the back of his throat that he stopped through a clenched jaw, and he instantly gripped the back of her head. Tilting her head back, his lips connected with the column of her throat. Her eyelids shut, and she moved her fingertips down his shirt, low enough to dip underneath the fabric, finally feeling the warm skin of his stomach.

The feel of her body pushing against him, her neck beneath his lips, her hands on his stomach, it was too much. He felt like he could black out from the bubble they were in.

The bubble burst.

Suddenly, they both heard the bell from the entrance ding. A group of teenagers came in laughing and yelling to the person who was working, who seemed to be their friend. They continued talking loudly as Steve and Nadia pulled back from one another. She removed herself from his lap and reluctantly pulled her hand away from his stomach. Their eyes met as Steve tried to hold onto her hand as all the warmth that had enveloped them was being sucked away.

She blinked several times before wiping the sweat from her neck and forehead. She ran her hands over her sweatshirt, smoothing the rumpled fabric, before taking a deep breath and blushing at him.

Leaning over, she kissed Steve on the cheek and said, "I am sorry, but I have to go."

Steve blinked and tried to come out from the haze his head was in. He looked at her and was confused as he felt her hand slip from his. She slid out the other end of the booth and briskly walked out of the coffee shop. As soon as Steve's brain caught up to what was happening several seconds later, he ran out to find her.

He looked around for the woman he just had an indecent, public display of affection with. But she was gone.

He stood in front of the coffee shop for a couple of minutes trying to grasp what just happened. He didn't know her last name. Hell, he didn't even know where she was from or what her number was. He collided with her a little over two hours ago. And in that time, she had gotten under his skin and had invaded his sense of rationality. He thought he had done the same to her.

And now she was gone.

His frustration and disbelief rose as he wiped the beads of sweat trailing down his face. He could still smell her and taste her lips. Another moment passed, and he shook his head and laughed in disbelief at himself and the situation.

"Jesus Rogers, what the hell is wrong with you?" he said out loud. He couldn't stop thinking about her, but his focus was slowly returning.

Tomorrow, he started this exciting new journey. Bucky would be there, everyone he met earlier would be there, and this was something that he had worked hard for. So, no matter how frustrated he might be, his goals became clearer in his mind again. He was going to get his ass back to his hotel room to get a good night's sleep before the start of his first day of training.

Steve walked back into the hotel lobby and heard the group of people he met earlier along with Bucky, laughing louder than before.

"There he is Sam!" Bucky yelled. Sam stood up and asked him if he had a good run. Steve responded, "The best," and huffed out a laugh. He walked over to Bucky and patted him on the back, "Make sure you get some rest because tomorrow will come soon." Bucky raised his beer and grinned, "See you in the morning, Steve."

Steve returned to his room and took off his shirt and pants. He fell heavily on the bed in a pair of shorts. He leaned over to make sure the alarm was set and fell asleep to images of red hair and green eyes.