It often crossed her mind how she managed to get herself so far up shits creek.
Naively, she had believed every word Brandon Frank said, every promise that would never be fulfilled and every kiss that left her feeling weightless. How could I be so dumb, her inner voice would often scold. Brandon was that boy that the girls gawked at, the one every girl wanted and every boy wanted to be like, and he knew it too. It was worse case scenario when she found out she was pregnant, and if it couldn't get any worse, Brandon decided ever so kindly that their relationship needed to be put on a heart stomping hiatus. Never had she fallen so hard for a boy, and never was she so willing to do whatever it took to keep him. That was easily her biggest fault, she grew attached to him, and was even convinced at one point that he loved her. He loved her body, her hips, her breasts, but not her.
Kamilah snapped out of her daze when she heard the knock on her door, a second later her mother came in her room. Kamilah remembered six months ago when she told her mother that she was pregnant, and how her mother cried endlessly for a whole day. There was no one to console her because for the longest time her parents had been separated, but she really knew she killed her mother. After the tears, her mother went through a stage where she would belittle Kamilah for being a stupid careless girl. Truth was, when it came to Brandon, she was very stupid. Then her mother wrapped her arms around her, deciding it was best to help her through this hardship rather than badger her about it. "Are you okay honey?" her mother sat at the edge of her bed, her hand reaching out to touch Kamilahs seven month baby belly. That day, they had met with the couple who would adopt the baby after it was born, they were nice newlyweds who couldn't conceive due to the woman's health. Kamilah liked the couple a lot, they had good jobs. The woman was a successful New York artist who had her own gallery, the man was a lawyer.
"Yeah" Kamilah smirked and looked down at her stomach. "It's just going to be weird when all this is over. But I'm doing the right thing aren't I?" even she needed reassuring at times.
'Of course" her mother took her into a hug. "The baby will have a good life, I can guarantee you that"
"I know" Kamilah stood and searched her wardrobe, she was going to the mall with her best friend Ronnie who was the typical macho man, every town in Jersey had their macho man. "Ronnie and I are hitting up the mall, I want to buy that new Avenged Sevenfold CD"
Her mother laughed. "And that's my cue to go. I cannot believe you listen to that noise…its hardly even music Kami"
"I cant believe you listen to opera, that's just ridiculous mother" she laughed and took out a Marilyn Manson tee shirt and a pair of shorts. Her mother left and Kamilah changed quickly, soon, Ronnie was outside the house in his 2000 blue Hyundai. With the honk of his horn, she applied some lip gloss and left. "Be home by ten" her mother told her.
The mall was full, it was weird, and even though the line was long at the music store, Kamilah got her hands on a copy of the new A7x cd. They ate pretzels at Auntie Anne and shared a Italian ice from Rita's. Ronnie did his usual prowl, collecting few phone numbers and even setting up a date with a thin blonde girl that was in Kamilahs Calculus class. They spent an hour in the book store, leaving empty handed, but they always made a point to look anyway. "My dad is working late in the studio tonight, want to go by?"
"Ronnie" she began with a stubborn face. "Your dad doesn't think too highly of me in case you forgot"
"Yeah well in case you forgot, my dad is just a middle aged Guido who doesn't think too high of anyone. Not even my mother"
Kamilah first saw him from behind the glass of the studio, he was writing, a guitar in his hands. Ronnie quickly read her face and grunted, elbowing his father for attention. "Dad, Kamilah thinks this guy is hot"
"Well this guy is taken last time I checked" Ronnie's father responded. "Besides, she's a bit…" he searched for words, his eyes at her stomach, but instead he shook his head.
"Who is this guy anyway?" Ronnie and Kamilah asked in unison.
"Do you two live under a rock? Well, Kamilah it's alright because your not much of a pop listener but son…I'm ashamed" he gestured for the boy in the recording booth to come and he nodded, putting down the guitar. "This is Joe Jonas, of the Jonas three"
"Jonas brothers" Joe corrected and smiled. He shook Ronnie's hand and looked at Kamilah who was clearly expecting. "I'm Joe" he shook her hand trying to ignore the fact that she looked like she was going to pop any minute. Though pregnant, he picked up on her beauty very fast. Her hair was an ash brown with blonde highlights, and her eyes were hazel. Her tan was natural and her figure was stunning, even with the round weight on her uterus. "Kamilah' she said coyly placing a hand on her stomach. "And yes I'm pregnant, I'm not smuggling a beach ball under my shirt"
"You are a bitch" Ronnie laughed and followed his dad to his office, leaving them alone. Kamilah would definitely make him pay for that one. Definitely.
"If it makes you feel better, you don't seem bitchy, just a bit sarcastic" Joe sat down and quickly looked at her stomach before correcting himself and looking at her face. "Sarcasm is nice every once in a while"
"Too bad…it's a regular thing with me. Comes with the belly" she laughed. "Its okay to look"
"It doesn't feel right", he admitted. "But your boyfriend is lucky, you're beautiful"'
What was she supposed to say to that? Joe Jonas just called her beautiful, and though she had no clue of any of his music, she felt rainbows. Truth was, Joe was newly single, and he knew a pretty girl when he saw one, he also liked to give compliments. "Most people would say thank you' he joked.
"Thank you" she smiled and looked down, trying to remember the last time she saw her feet. "And though I wish I could say otherwise, there is no boyfriend" it was a sad thing to admit, but it was a true statement. With Brandon gone living his life as single, she was unsure how she felt about a lot of things. Taking a compliment seemed so uneasy.
"Wow"
"Yeah, nice to knock me up then call it quits huh" she was being sarcastic yet again but that statement was one that he didn't know how to react to. "It's fine, I'm not bitter"
"Good. Let me take you out then"
"In case your blind as a bat, I'm seven months pregnant and you're apparently a star. Wouldn't want your image to deteriorate for being seen with a preggers girl"
He smiled his killer smile, knowing instantly that he could get used to her. "In case you have not noticed, I don't judge"
They walked the Atlantic city board walk, it wasn't far from where she lived, maybe ten miles at the most. He was like an open book, which stunned her, she always viewed most pop stars as robots, trained to be this way or that way but he was real. Nothing he said seemed to be carefully thought out, and his responses didn't seemed characterized by an image for the press. He was real with all of his responses and reactions. Then, from afar, walking hand in hand with a voluptuous raven haired girl was Brandon. He saw her instantly, his eyes full of regret, regret that only she could read. "Why are you looking at that guy like you want to kill him?"
"Because I do" Kamilah responded. "That's the guy that knocked me up"