Warning: Character Death.

Racing Wheelchairs

march 2020

We're going to be racing down the halls of our retirement home in wheelchairs.

That had been one of the things Eddie had said when he gave her the promise ring at age seventeen. Patricia had laughed hard at the image of them racing in wheelchairs and gladly accepted the promise ring, smiling wildly as she did. And then they had kissed and hugged and reminisced.

Life had been good. Life had been so good.

Patricia laughs at the memory now too, wiping tears from her eyes as she looks down at his photo, memorizing him like she had every night since it happened, telling herself she'd see him soon enough. Maybe not now, but soon. Soon enough, they're going to be racing wheelchairs up there, in heaven.

She did eventually move on from Eddie, just like everyone had said she would. Her new boyfriend's name was Max, with brown hair and brown eyes and tan skin. He didn't look anything like Eddie, and that was on purpose. That had been the initial reason Patricia had chosen him as a boyfriend- because he could be her distraction from Eddie. However, over time, she had come to love Max for more than being her needed distraction- he was a great guy on her own, and several days, Patricia felt as if he didn't deserve him. At first, she had been using him to get over her ex-boyfriend.

No, Patricia shakes her head, holding the picture frame tighter. Eddie wasn't her ex. Some part of her would always regard him as her boyfriend, no matter what had happened. To everyone else though, she couldn't say that. She couldn't tell them how she really felt, because if she did, she'd be sent to therapy. So, to everyone else, she was completely moved on. They didn't know that she pulled out his picture every night and stroked his features through the glass. They didn't know how many tears she had shed when she was alone. They didn't know that sometimes, she took out the promise ring he had given her- that had miraculously survived the wreckage- and put it on herself and just pretended that he would be walking through the door anytime now.

"Who's that?" Max's voice makes her jump on the bed. She hadn't wanted him to know about Eddie- Eddie was hers and hers only, a little piece of her that she could keep entirely to herself. But she tells him anyway, because it would feel wrong lying about Eddie and saying he was some distant relative. Eddie deserved more than that.

"My boy- ex-boyfriend," Patricia says, not turning around to face Max, clutching the photo so that her knuckles turn white.

"You're looking at pictures of your ex-boyfriend?" Max remarks, a little enraged. "Wow, Patricia. You know, I honestly thought-"

"He's dead," she gulps painfully, trying to sound emotionless as she speaks in monotone. Her voice is barely a whisper, but Max falls silent at the words and she continues, "He died six years ago, March 23rd, at 2:03 PM. He's dead."

And then she hears a slow breath exit her current boyfriend as he wraps his arms around her from behind. "I'm so sorry," he whispers in her ear, and she lets a teardrop fall on the picture, rolling down the glass.

"He was eighteen," Patricia mumbles. "He didn't deserve this."

"Nobody does."

"We were fighting," she says, placing a gentle kiss on the photo. "We were in his car. I took off the promise ring he gave me and I threw it at him. I told him I hated him. I told him I hated him."

"Patricia, you don't have to talk about this."

"And then…poof! The car crashed."

"Patricia-"

"The car crashed."

"Pat-"

And suddenly she screams, probably scaring him, turning around and punching Max in the chest as he holds her tight. She tries to hold it all back, but she can't, she just can't. "He was eighteen. I loved him! He told me he would love me until the day he died, and now he's dead! He's dead!" And suddenly she was crying harder and harder, hyperventilating, telling Max to 'let her go' as he keeps a firm grip on her waist.

"Patricia, you have to calm down. Let's think about something else, okay?"

"I haven't thought about something else in years," she whimpers. "Every day, it's about him, it's about Eddie."

"Patricia, breathe."

"I'm breathing, you idiot!" she screams, before finally surrendering and crying into his chest as stereotyped. She can feel his hand stroking her back, and he's whispering something in her ear but she doesn't know what. It can't be anything important though, so she keeps focusing on Eddie.

It's you I want to be with, Doofus. Always was and always will be.

Max is still murmuring in her ear, placing gentle kisses on her forehead. She's calming down the slightest, enough to sit up on her own. She opens her mouth to speak but Max stops her before she has the chance.

"Patricia, honestly, we don't have to talk about it."

"No," she shakes her head, determined. Max can't just know half of the story. He needs to know everything about what happened, and she's going to tell him. "I'm going to start after I woke up in the hospital bed. Right when the nurse told me." She looks to Max, who nods, squeezing her hand tightly to comfort her. "Okay, so when my eyes finally opened…"

march 2014

six years earlier

Everything was blurry.

Patricia reached up to rub her head, thoroughly surprised when she saw an IV implanted in her hand. Her eyes soon become accustomed to the harsh white light, and she looked around curiously. She was in a hospital- everything was white and machines were beeping and the smell of disinfectant coated her. The figures turned clear and she saw everybody- KT, Fabian, Mara, Joy, Jerome, Alfie, and Willow. She grinned slightly at them all before looking around for Eddie, because surely if she's in a hospital, Eddie would come visit her, right?

It was then that it all came back.

Eddie. Car accident. Eddie. Car accident.

The nurse walked in before she had a chance to ask anyone where her boyfriend was. The nurse smiled slightly, but it was a sad sort of smile, and Patricia frowned in return, shifting in the bed.

"Lay still," the nurse commanded, fluffing her pillow. Patricia noticed her demeanor though and was quick to question.

"Where's my boyfriend?" she growled, but the nurse blinked stupidly. "My boyfriend? Eddie? Eddie Miller?"

"There's no easy way to say this, Ms. Williamson," the nurse bit her lip and Patricia's world stopped. She had watched enough television shows to know what was coming next.

There's no easy way to say this, Ms. Williamson.

"But Mr. Miller died one hour ago."

"You're lying," Patricia murmured after a minute full of held breath, grasping at the white sheets with shaky fingers. Eddie wasn't dead. He couldn't be. He was strong. He was brave. He wouldn't have left her like this.

The nurse spoke softly, "His last words were 'Tell Yacker I love her.' I presume you're Yacker, am I correct?"

"You're lying," she growled, struggling to get up until the nurse pushed her back down. "He's not dead, you hear me? He can't be dead! Let me see him! He's probably just pulling a prank or something! He's not dead!"

"Ms. Williamson, I understand you're upset-"

The tears sprouted, "He can't be dead because he told me he would be with me! He told me we'd race our wheelchairs in the retirement home! He's not dead!" Patricia thrashed in the bed, fighting the wires so that she could get up. The nurse panicked, holding her down, and then gesturing to Jerome, Alfie, and Fabian, who rushed to Patricia's side to get her to stop moving.

"It'll hurt more if she keeps moving," the nurse warned, placing a hand on Patricia's shoulder. "I know-"

Patricia batted her hand away, "Get away from me! All of you, leave! Eddie is not dead!"

Fabian began talking, looking sympathetic, "Patricia-"

"I said leave!" Patricia pointed to the door, tears staining her vision. "Go! Now!" But she didn't say anything else, because at that moment, she collapsed into tears and everything turned blurry once more as she tried to compose herself. Alfie patted her back in comfort and Fabian tried to say something about how 'Eddie would be missed' but that didn't help at all. She screamed and shouted and sobbed, eventually running out of tears. The last thing she did was throw up, right before fainting. The world turned black and everyone faded away, everything faded away.

And she welcomed it.

march 2020

"I had no idea," Max admits quietly, kissing her cheek and holding her close once more. Patricia nods, wiping her eyes frantically again. "I'm so sorry." And Patricia clenches at the word- she hates that word. What will that word ever do? Will it bring him back?

"I was so scared to even get into a car for months," she says, composing herself and tracing a finger on the photo frame. This was the only photo she has left of him- she had smashed the other ones a while back in a fit of rage, and she regrets it to this day. She wishes she has more physical memories of him- things he'd given her, pictures of them both. But they didn't even take many pictures together when he was alive- she didn't like having her photo taken, but Eddie had always been able to make her smile and then discreetly captured it with his camera.

But now? Now, it's just Max, who strokes her hair and the two stay there for the rest of the night, staring at the picture of Eddie in silence.

march 2021

one year later

They're fighting.

Patricia is trying so hard to keep everything together because she's scared of doing this again. She hasn't gotten in a car with Max for a while, afraid they'll start a heated argument and he'll crash just like Eddie had years ago.

"What if I died, Patricia?" Max yells once at dinner, looking upset. He hasn't even touched his food- always a bad sign- and Patricia's heart stops for a minute before she murmurs.

"Don't talk like that."

"Would you hold my photo in your hands and talk to it constantly?"

Patricia's eyes began to water- he wasn't talking about this with her, he wasn't comparing himself to Eddie. He had no damn right to do such a thing. "I-"

Max sighs, glancing over at Eddie's photo, which has become a staple in the living room. They both know what Patricia does at nighttime- she gets out of their bed and sneaks down to see the photo once more. He's followed her a couple times and he's honestly questioning their relationship now- the question he just asked stands. But she looks so vulnerable that he soon lowers his voice, "I don't know, sometimes, Patricia. I get what happened. I'm sorry for you, okay? But you're obviously stuck in the past." Patricia's eyes clench shut at the statement and it pains him, but he continues. "Maybe we should take a break. Just until you…" he trails off.

"Until I what?" Patricia remarks bitterly. "Get over him?"

"Move on," Max says, patting her hand gently. "Patricia, you need to let him go. Do you think Eddie would want you to be like this? He'd want you to be happy, wouldn't he?" Patricia nods, looking up at Max.

"And you think breaking up with me will make me happy?" Her voice cracks involuntarily and she wonders what happened to the girl who always claimed she didn't need a guy. But that was before she even had a guy- and once she found the love and affection a boyfriend gave her, she didn't want to go back to that girl who was so independent that she pushed everyone away. But this time, Max is pushing her away too as he places one last kiss on her lips.

"Patricia, I've tried for a year. But you'll never love me the way you love Eddie. And I can't take that," Max whispers, and Patricia gapes at him in shock. No, he can't be leaving her. Not like everybody else.

Not like Eddie.

march 2021

She goes to the graveyard that night, making her way to his tombstone carefully.

She's not expecting someone else though.

And when she does finally make out that the figure is Mr. Sweet, she softens. The past few years, she's been so caught up in her feelings that she never considered his. Mr. Sweet would understand what it felt like, and it was that which propelled her to step forward and kneel next to him, placing the flowers down with shaky hands.

"Hi, Mr. Sweet."

"Patricia," the man looks surprised, and she can see the tears in his eyes. "I didn't expect to see you here." Patricia shrugs in response, turning her attention back to the tombstone.

"I miss him so much," she whispers, tracing her finger over the inscription.

"As do I," Mr. Sweet mutters, and the two fall into a comfortable silence. Eric finally clears his throat, "My son loved you, Patricia." She freezes in her spot but lets him talk, toying with the promise ring, which she had put on once more just to reminisce. "He talked about marrying you, proposing to you. I told him not to rush into anything. He wanted to get serious with you, settle down with you. I told him to wait."

She bites her lip, deciding it's time to say something to him. "He loved you too."

Eric shakes his head bitterly, looking wistful, "No, he didn't. I left him when he was younger, and it's my biggest regret to this day."

Patricia shakes her head too- he's got it all wrong and he needs to know that. She had always known Eddie loved her, and that knowledge made it all a little better throughout the years, counteracting the fact that the last thing she said was that she hated him. "You should've heard him talk about you, Mr. Sweet. You were his idol." And suddenly they're both standing up, and Patricia's wrapping her arms around Mr. Sweet. They stand like that for a while, until Eric breaks down into her shoulder. Hearing his sobs makes her cry too, and soon they're both crying, simultaneously comforting each other.

"Ms. Williamson?" Eric finally chokes out.

"Yes?"

"I understand we had our differences, but I would've been delighted had you turned out to be my daughter in law."

And it was those words that cause her to smile. A weak, watery smile, "I would've been delighted too, Mr. Sweet."

march 2022

one year later

Max looks up at the sound of a knock on his door. He had long since moved out of Patricia's and he's shared apartment, but it was no secret that he still had feelings for the girl. He sighs, putting down his book and looking outside his window- it's raining, why would someone come visit him? Nevertheless, he opens the door.

Patricia.

She's holding flowers and looking down. Max ushers her in wordlessly, and it's only after she's bundled up in a blanket and holding a mug of hot chocolate does she start talking.

"I came to say I'm sorry," she mumbles, taking a sip before locking eyes with him. "You were right. I was stuck in the past. Maybe I always will be. I've been working on it though, trying to find some closure." She looks down once more. "And…and I miss you. Eddie…he's always going to have a special place in my heart and you can't change that. He's always going to be my first kiss and first boyfriend and the first guy I ever loved. But…I want you to be my second," Patricia says, handing him the flowers and watching him curiously.

"Yes," Max says, wrapping her in a tight hug, not caring that she's sopping wet. He understands and he's just glad she made an effort for him. It's all he could've asked for.

march 2023

one year later

She still holds his photograph sometimes. Not as often, but sometimes. Max and she are engaged now, but she still plays with her promise ring once in a while. Today, she's holding it in front of his tombstone.

"I hope you don't mind I said yes," she mutters. "I don't think you would though, slime ball. Because Max is right: you'd want me to be happy, yeah? So, if you can see me, Eddie? You weasel, I'm getting married. But…I'll always love you too, you doofus. Always have and always will." She sighs- where would she be right now if Eddie was still alive? Would they be married, with kids? Would they have broken up and gone their own way? She would give anything to see him again, to bring him back.

But she can't, and Patricia's come to accept that. Eddie would be happy for her, if not a little jealous. He did always get jealous easily. Tears spring from her eyes but she's gotten so used to the feeling that she doesn't even wipe them away, just traces that inscription over and over again.

"I think I'm moving on, Eddie," Patricia whispers quietly. "But I'll never forget you."

june 2023

She catches Mr. Sweet's eye as she walks down the aisle and he smiles. They've definitely become a lot closer since the incident in the graveyard, and somehow, he's turned into a father for her, regardless that she never actually became his daughter in law.

But that night, she doesn't think about what Eddie would say if he were here. Some part of Patricia tells her he would approve, that he'd think Max was good for her. So that night, she kisses Max and she reconnects with all her old friends, who look proud of her for finding someone else and getting on with life.

That night, she lets herself be happy.

march 2083

sixty years later

Patricia shifts in her wheelchair, looking over at Max, who's snoring next to her. She laughs as he begins drooling, and she looks out the window nervously. The past years have been great- Max and she had two kids and both were happy with their lives. Their kids didn't know about Eddie- Patricia kept his photo hidden now, not wanting to resurface the grief. Sure, the two children often wondered why their mother looked tearier than usual on March 23rd, but Max had just carefully pushed them away from the subject every time. It was better that way- and besides, even without knowing exactly what had happened on the date, Patricia's kids always comforted her on that day. They didn't need to know why she cried over March 23rd- they had never known Eddie, what would it even matter to them?

"Hey," a voice whispers in her ear, and she looks over to Max, who's still sleeping. "Yacker! I'm over here!"

Eddie.

Patricia turns to see Eddie next to her, grinning and looking like the same teenager she once knew. He looked unhurt but is in a wheelchair anyway and a smile falls on her face at the sight. She reaches out to touch him, under a trance, but as her hand brushes him, it passes through. He's not real- it wouldn't be plausible that he was, but she had let herself hope. She had been foolish to let herself hope.

"Don't think about that," Eddie laughs, watching Patricia pass a hand through him once more. He looks over at Max, and turns to Patricia. "He's your husband?" His smile was bittersweet but he did indeed look happy for her, just like she had guessed he would.

"Eddie-"

"I'm happy for you, Yacker," Eddie says, turning solid and intertwining their fingers. No one else seemed to see him, but Patricia grins at their clasped hands. He still isn't real but at least it feels like he's actually there once more. "I miss you, Patricia."

"I miss you too," Patricia rasps. She thinks of shouting at him for the torture he's caused, but she doesn't. This moment is too precious to waste fighting. Every moment they had together was too precious to waste fighting, and she had learned that only after he died. All the best life lessons only came after he died, actually.

"You are so strong," Eddie whispers, pressing his lips to her hand. "I love you so much. I'm waiting for you, you know. My dad's already up here with me." Patricia nods, remembering Mr. Sweet's funeral, remembering how much emotional turmoil she had gone through, even though she knew his time had to come soon. "I watched you."

"You stalked me? Wow, Krueger."

Eddie laughs and her heart aches- how many times has she wanted to hear that again? "I've always been watching over you, Patricia."

"I don't hate you," Patricia mumbles, getting teary eyed. Eddie wipes one of her tears away and gives her a soft smile.

"Don't cry, okay? I'm not used to it. You're too pretty to cry."

"Still a sap, I see," she laughs slightly, squeezing his hand tighter, as if it's a lifeline. She's old and wrinkly and sagging everywhere, but somehow, Eddie still finds her wonderful. "I love you."

"I love you too," Eddie replies instantly, looking over at Max once more. "He's a lucky guy."

"He's wonderful," Patricia says thoughtfully, thinking back to their years together. She can't help but love him too, because he's everything she's ever wanted in a guy. Then again, so was Eddie, and though it seems wrong, some part of Patricia knows that if Eddie was still alive, she would've picked him over Max. But he's not, so she just says: "I treated him terribly for the longest time because I was too sad over you and he still took me back. He means a lot to me."

"I'm glad," Eddie kisses her cheek before tearing apart from her and shifting in his wheelchair, turning to her. He smirks and she just knows. Eddie's come for one reason, and that reason is to keep his promise. "Ready, Yacker?"

And she grips her own wheelchair too, and soon they're racing down the halls, laughing crazily and trying to pass each other. Patricia throws her head back and Eddie beams at her, picking up his pace. She outstretches her arm to whack his shoulder as she'd done so many times when they were dating, and he catches a glimpse of her wedding ring and then the promise ring he had given her, roped around her neck on a chain. Patricia accelerates and he laughs too, trying to catch up.

They all tell her she's crazy, pointing fingers at the old woman, who's laughing while riding fast in her wheelchair. She's constantly looking to her left, as if she's looking at someone, but everyone dismisses it: she must be going insane.

But Patricia can't bring herself to care, because Eddie was right:

We're going to be racing down the halls of our retirement home in wheelchairs.