Title: The Rocket Man Calamity
Summary: Alternate version of the last scene of The Friendship Contraction. Just a quick one-shot.
Category: Humor (at least, I hope it's humorous)
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I do not own The Big Bang Theory or any of its wonderful characters. I just like to play around with them on occasion.
Author's Note: This was actually my husband's idea. I just ran with it. Also, this is my first ever fan fiction, and it is un-betaed, so bear with me.
The Rocket Man Calamity
Howard and Raj are in Howard's bedroom. Raj is standing in front of the bed and Howard is sitting in his desk chair in front of an open laptop. He is holding his phone. "Alright. Test my ringtone?" he asks and Raj calls from his own cellphone. "Rocket Man" begins to play as Raj bobs his head and Howard smiles. "It really is a good song," he says.
Raj responds, "Yeah, there's a reason he's Sir Elton John. They don't make you a knight for writing 'Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go.'"
Howard nods his head and says, "I downloaded a few other Elton ringtones too. I've got them set for certain people. Yours is set as 'Rocket Man' for now, but I'll change it later."
"Cool, dude. What are you going to change it to?"
"Haven't decided yet," Howard says. "I've got Mom's set to 'The Bitch Is Back.'" They laugh.
As if she knows they're talking about her, Mrs. Wolowitz yells from downstairs. "HOWAHD, ARE YOU COMIN' DOWN FOR BREAKFAST?"
"Speak of the devil," Howard says under his breath. He yells back at his mother, "MA, I TOLD YOU I HAVE A VIDEO CONFERENCE WITH NASA. I SAID DON'T BOTHER ME!"
"OH, LISTEN TO MISTA BIG-SHOT-ASTRANAHT!" she replies.
"YES, PLEASE LISTEN TO MR. BIG-SHOT-ASTRONAUT!" he yells back while absent-mindedly flipping through a notebook. Raj is still standing beside Howard's bed during the loud conversation, but he sits down when they hear the Skype call.
Howard sits up straight, his hands clasped in front of him, and answers the call. "Hey! Good morning!" he says to the astronaut on the other end of the line.
"Hey, Howard. Thanks for getting up so early," the astronaut says.
"No problem, Dr. Massimino."
Dr. Massimino smiles and tells him, "The guys here call me 'Mass.'"
"'Mass!'" Howard exclaims, "That's a cool nickname, 'cause force equals mass times acceleration!"
"Yeah, it's just short for Massimino," he says with a shrug. Howard looks embarrassed for a moment. Mass continues, "Anyway, the plan for this morning is to go over the..."
He is suddenly interrupted by Howard's ringtone. Raj is sitting on the bed, but he isn't the one calling. Howard panics when he realizes that the song playing is not "Rocket Man." He quickly rejects the call, noting to himself to call Bernadette back as soon as possible. "Sorry. My phone," he says while holding it up for Mass to see. Raj sits wide-eyed on the bed.
"What was that? Was that Elton John?"
"Yeah. My ringtone. It was my fiancée calling. Hm…" He doesn't know what to say now. "Again, I'm sorry about that."
Mass replies, "No problem…'Tiny Dancer.'"
Raj sits on the edge of the bed, barely containing his laughter. Howard looks at the computer with a pained expression on his face, clearly disappointed with his new nickname.
The End