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Disclaimer: I don't own this, I am proud to promise you that the introduction of Bella Swan to the World was in no way to do with me.

I knew Sam might turn into a werewolf before he changed, we'd talked about it, one wintry night by the fire. He wasn't sure that he liked the idea of suddenly feeling forced to cater to someone's whims. We'd laughed at it, discussed it, finally deciding that it didn't matter, because he was in love with me already – or so he said – and he practically acted that way anyway. So it was all well and good, we weren't even sure that he'd change. He did. He rang me up, half-excited about the whole thing, half-frightened. He had never fit in too well, so he was eager to gain a pack, but scared to face the vampires.

That was one of the things I loved about him, he was never scared to tell me how he really felt about anything and everything, I went over, we'd already decided that I would be the first to see the wolf. I stood there in the doorway waiting, his brown eyes staring back at me, he changed back. It was all smiles and laughter.

"I told you I loved you." He said.

The wolf was supposed to pick the perfect person, he didn't feel any differently towards me, it was obvious to us then, that we were as in love as anyone could be. His feelings hadn't changed because I already brightened up his day by just being there. We were foolish and naïve back then, but happy. The World was perfect, the change hadn't changed him, not in the slightest, we still loved each other.

That had been the last test, the last obstacle. I lost my virginity to Sam that night. It was wonderful, full of whispered endearments. 'I love you, always and forever.' being the last thing I heard before drifting up to sleep. I woke to a golden morning, one of those rare ones (especially in Forks) where the sun glows through the curtains bathing the room in a gentle light. I showered, got dressed in the top that Sam bought me for my birthday and went downstairs. I felt great, amazing, I'd hidden it, but I had been just the slightest bit afraid that maybe the wolf wouldn't choose me, or that it would change Sam.

Then I saw it. Sam staring at Emily. My Sam, staring at Emily. My surrogate sister. Sam didn't even turn his head when I knocked a vase to the floor and it shattered. He just smiled vapidly at Emily like some kind of lovesick zombie. I bolted. Tree branches lashed at me. All I knew about where I was going that it was away. Away from them. Away from all of us, me, Sam, Emily, would have been better, and if there was a way to do that I would have done so.

It was the Black's house I ended up going to. I knew Jacob, was sorta friends with him, even though he was a year younger than me. If Sam had liked him, I probably would have been better friends with him, but if Sam had liked him, maybe I wouldn't have gone to Jacob. I don't know. It was Billy Black that opened the door to me, not yet in a wheelchair. I think he tried to talk to me, but I just went straight upstairs and started banging on Jacob's. He looked confused to see me, but no more than I felt. I think he said: "Hey Leah." before I pushed my way into his room. I could be wrong, he used to say that to everyone, 'hey' not 'hey Leah'.

I basically flung myself at him, and started crying harder than I already was. He took it well, he's a good guy Jacob. I was still crying when Sam turned up. Admittedly, with wolf speed, it probably wasn't that much later. He gave me his old smile, walked towards me, and for a minute, for a precious minute, I thought that I had just been paranoid because of the change, that he hadn't really been looking at Emily that way. Then he opened his mouth.

"Leah, you have to come back. Emily's really upset."

"Emily? Not everything is about Emily, Sam."

"You're being selfish, now come with me."

"What about me? What about us?"

"That doesn't matter, there is no us."

"I'm not going with you."

I backed away from him. Shaking my head. He was making a growling noise deep in his throat. And as I stepped away, he came closer, stalking me like prey. When I looked at him I couldn't see the man, I could only see the animal, a strange opposite to when he was in wolf form, and I could only see the man. Jacob got to his feet eyes darting between us. He moved between us, staring with terrified eyes at Sam who quivered with his eyes locked on me.

Werewolf speed, did Sam have werewolf strength too? I couldn't risk it. I placed a hand on Jacob's shoulder. Sam emitted a growl, this one slightly lower than the first. I tried to keep my breathing steady as I forced my feet to carry me forwards.

I hesitated as I drew level with Jacob. I half-turned so I could look him in the face.

"Bye Jake. I'll see you later."

"Bye Leah, you sure it's okay."

He looked between Sam and I. No it wasn't okay, in the slightest.

"Yeah Jake. I'll see you tomorrow."

"No you won't." Sam interrupted us, "you're staying home tomorrow."

Jake seemed to want to intervene so I said:

"I'll call or something."

I would have said more, but Sam had my forearm in a grip so tight it was all I could do not to cry out. He pretty much dragged me down their gateway, as we entered the woods he broke into a lope. He wasn't running as fast as he could, but it was still too fast for the emotionally drained, relatively weak human me. I was being dragged as much as I was moving on my own accord.

Dimly something occurred to me, I was right about the werewolf strength, I would have several deep purple fingermark-shaped reminders of that strength for weeks to come. It won't be so bad, I told myself. The best point for that argument was that Emily cared for me, and that Sam having imprinted on her wouldn't like to make her unhappy by harming me further once we got back. The second best point was that Emily had never expressed any interest in Sam, and even though he had imprinted on her, she certainly hadn't imprinted on him. I could hear Emily wailing as we neared the house.

Sam literally ripped the door off its hinges and shoved me inside. There was a foreign, dangerous dark gleam in his eyes. It scared me, badly.

"Go apologise to Emily."

I walked inside tentatively.

"Em." I called out.

"Em, it's Leah, I'm sorry."

"What for?" She laughed almost bitterly, "you haven't done anything."

I glanced back at Sam who casually stepped until he was standing right behind me. What was I supposed to be sorry for? He shifted even closer so that his front was pressed up against my back. After everything, all I wanted to do was melt backwards into his embrace and have everything be okay again.

"For everything," he growled into my ear. "Tell her you're sorry for everything."

"I'm sorry for everything Em, absolutely everything." I repeated a tremor to my voice.

"Are you sorry that my Mom died?"

"Yes Em, I'm sorry for that."

"What about my Dad's death, are you sorry for that too?"

"That too."

My voice was little more than a whisper. Did Em really blame me for all that.

"I don't want you to be sorry."

Sam's hand wrapped itself just a little too tightly around my throat. He squeezed it momentarily, just to prove he could. I was absolutely shaking by this point.

"Don't be sorry," she repeated. "None of it was your fault."

"Get her to come out." He hissed in my ear.

"Em, please come out."

"Why?"

"So I can see that you're alright."

It shocked me to know that in part, that was almost the truth, I did want to know that she was alright.

"Is Sam with you."

I paused, Sam obviously wanted me to say no, but she'd see the truth soon enough.

"Yeah, Em. He's here, we both are."

"Are things better with you guys now?"

"A little, it would help if you were here to mediate."

I heard the bathroom lock click, then a jacket was dumped around my shoulders and Sam's dark eyes were on me again. I didn't move.

"It's to cover up the bruises. Zip it up all the way."

My numb fingers stumbled over the simple task, finally managing to get the zipper to rest just beneath my chin. Emily pattered down the stairs, still somehow beautiful despite the tear tracks. Emily could be beautiful through anything, unlike me. Although with the way Sam simply didn't seem to register me anymore, there was very little point in me being beautiful. She eyed the jacket.

"So you two aren't angry with each other anymore?"

"Of course not, Leah felt cold so I lent her my jacket."

The words and the cheerful tone in which he spoke them made me feel cold. I shivered. Emily's eyes were on Sam as he spoke to her in the far corner of the kitchen. Away from me. I couldn't blame her, afterall, I dated him for years. A dark little voice in the back of my mind whispered that I would still date him now if he asked me. I sank into an armchair having left the kitchen. I'd never realised that Emily was so into him. Not that she would have told me, knowing that I like him too. Emily's good like that, but it doesn't stop it hurting. My Emily and My Sam, thew three of us always had gotten on rather well together. But before it was me and Sam, and Emily. Now it was Sam and Emily, and me, Leah. It was a very lonely feeling knowing that three is a crowd, and that you are the disposable one. Laughter came from the kitchen, it belonged to both of them, but the tears that fell in the living room belonged to me and me alone.

Later that night Emily came to me whilst I was asleep, or pretending to be.

"Leah."

I pretended not to hear her.

"Leah, I know you're awake."

I made a muffled moan and rolled over slowly, so that I could hear clearly, but if it was something I didn't want to talk about I could still pretend to have been half-asleep and not remember come morning.

"Leah. Leah, why did you break up with Sam?"

She leant down to shake my shoulder.

"Please Leah. This is important, you are okay with me dating your ex-boyfriend aren't you?"

I obediently pulled my head out from under the covers.

"Yes, Em. I'm fine with it."

"You don't sound fine with it. Are you sure."

"Of course, I'm just tired."

She left with a sympathetic smile.

I wasn't fine with it. I wasn't fine with it at all, but what was I supposed to say, that Sam was going to propose at the start of the Summer holidays. Next month. We wouldn't have be able to get married for a while because of her age. That at the moment, despite loving Emily like a sister I hated her. Hated her for stealing Sam. Hated her for being so nice about it so that I couldn't hate her some more. Hated her for not knowing that I was lying and that my heart was breaking. I rolled over again and pushed my forehead against the cold wall. Then I cried. Crying is supposed to get the pain out of you, but the pain didn't vanish and I couldn't stop crying. I cried so hard that my head ached and I ran out of tears so I just lay there sniffling, then I cried some more.