Title: Restart
Warnings: Yaoi, AU, angst
-}[RESTART]
It was really strange.
He felt...blank. Like somehow he had woken up from some dream, that he had just now realized that he was living. He let his eyes droop, and soon he found himself at the computer again.
A smile broke across his face, he logged into the game, fingers flying across the keys in recognition.
[S]: Be Gamzee Makara
The curly haired boy soon became immersed into a whole new world, he was motherfucking amazed. His blue eyes reflected the lights on the screen, instead turning a deep purple as he traveled further into the game.
He knew he had to find the other troll, he needed to regroup and talk to the other lovely boy he met all those years ago. Soon Gamzee frowned as he encountered a group of enemies, quickly whipping out his sylladex in order to avoid the fight. He continued this routine until he could barely keep up, he really wasn't in a mood to fight. Soon enough after hours of searching he tired out his troll, Gamzee would die from fatigue if he continued any longer-
Purple eyes widened as he spotted another enemy in the brush, "Motherfuck!" Completely unprepared for a fight Gamzee could not flee, so he sighed and awaited his death to come-
The enemy let out a howl and its life bar drained, someone had killed it.
Gamzee was still alive, be very weak, and he maneuvered in order to see his savior. A smile graced his face, and he could barely keep his heart still.
"hEY ARE YOU OKAY?"
Excitement shot through his veins, heart singing at the appearance of the other troll, the feelings so intense that he even fucked up on his typing quirk, "I'm fine thanks to you. i MeAn I'm StIlL dYiNg BuT i CaN tOuGh It OuT."
The two characters interacted on screen, and soon the troll named Tavros was healing Gamzee. Quickly Tavros then teleported the two of them into his hive, trying to restock Gamzee's inventory before they would leave to the dangerous world. Gamzee simply looked around, this was actually the first time he had ever been into Tavros' hive.
[S]: Space out like a high motherfucker.
It really had been years that the boys had know each other.
Gamzee had met while playing alone, he never had built a team, mainly because everyone was leaving Suburb and moving onto WW7. He would play a lot, and at ungodly hours too, his parents were never really there to say anything.
Anyways, so he had come across the other troll player, and soon he just started hanging around him. They clicked, and soon they created a team together. Tavros was always on around 6pm and never missed a day of playing. Gamzee would be the last one to sign off though. It was getting harder nowadays, Suburb was changing and the game was starting to glitch up. Shit would start re-spawning, and the teams were being ripped apart. Inventory would disappear, all in all the whole game was falling apart. Gamzee didn't know when it would be fixed but he hoped it would be soon, he didn't know if he could fucking take it if he lost connection with Tavros.
"uHHH,,, .i THINK WE'RE ALL SET,"
Gamzee pulled from his trance and sighed, "cOoL tHeN, lEaD tHe WaY mOtHeRfUcKeR. : O)"
The set off into the bright world, the trees and scenery already beginning to fuck up into oblivion. Gamzee laughed, instead opting to pull up a chat.
terminallyCapricious [TC] began pestering adiosToreador[AT]
TC: HeY TaVbRo, I'M JuSt aLl uP AnD WoNdErInG If wE CaN MeEt uP
AT: uHHHH,,, i'M NOT TOO SURE ABOUT THAT,
AT: bECAUSE MY DAD DOESN'T LIKE UHHH,, ME MEETING ONLINE FRIENDS
AT: sORRY,,, ):{
TC: NaH BrO I UnDeRsTaNd, I JuSt tHoUgHt tHaT MaYbE SiNcE We wErE AlL Up aNd bEsT BrOs tHaT We cOuLd mEeT Up aNd sTuFf
TC: )O:
It had always been like this.
Sure the two boys had been talking to each other for a while now but he had never seen Tavros in person, and honestly the teen was curious. Tavros said the troll was modeled after himself but Gamzee couldn't get the right mental image. He kept seeing Tavros as his troll self, he sometimes thought that maybe he was a troll in real life, hiding behind a computer screen with his giant horns.
It had certainly been an amusing thought.
But really the conversations they had were not so shallow, it wasn't just idle talk, Gamzee had actually gotten personal. He really didn't know why he felt so comfortable with Tavros, but he had let out all his anger and frustration, his doubts and worries, all the while Tavros had been there, talking back. It was the first time someone was with him, here he didn't feel so alone. Even at school, even though he had tons of friends he had felt the cold chills biting at his insides, they couldn't understand. There were very few people he could actually trust with his inner turmoil, he just couldn't say the hurt he was feeling.
He finally noticed his misty eyes, lights and colors swirling and mixing, it was beautiful-
AT: uHHH,,, gAMZEE?
AT: i'M REALLY SORRY,,, pLEASE DON'T BE MAD AT ME,,,
AT: gAMZEE,,, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU,,, I NEED YOUR HELP
AT: bUT UHHHMM,, i DON'T WANT TO BOTHER YOU OR ANYTHING,,,
He wiped his eyes, and let his fingers run across the keys,
TC: It's cOoL BrO, wHaT Do yA NeEd hElPiN' wItH TaVbRo?
AT: uHHHH,,, .i THINK I'M IN LOVE,
[S]: Be the shy boy in love.
It was pathetic really.
It was a tumulus mess of teenage hormones, but he couldn't help but allow himself to fall. It was almost like a movie, except without the happy ending. His eyes had always looked through the crowds, pushing through the passer-bys, he could barely keep breathing.
He appeared, his smile brightening the whole room.
Travis felt his breath leave him, completely awe struck by the boy across the hall. Soon the crowd swallowed him whole, he was gone again, leaving behind emptiness. Brown eyes finally pulled away, quickly refocusing on where exactly he was, soon he found his breath again.
Gabriel would never see him.
It was just never meant to be, and Travis wondered how he could allow himself to get lost in the emotions. The two would never meet, they weren't friends. Gabriel had been put on a pedestal, and Travis could only watch and admire. He would never get a chance to talk to the eternally happy boy, he meant nothing to him-
Sometimes Gabriel would turn away for a moment, and his whole smile would fall, tears glazing his blue eyes.
Travis was honestly surprised when he came into the bathroom that day, only to find Gabriel hunched over the off-white sink, soft sobs passing through his lips and echoing off the walls. He had come in there to clean up some wounds he got, he never expected this. Gabriel looked up, locking eyes with the intruder, his blue eyes piercing and angry.
Travis felt his heart ice over, every nerve began to die over, he was terrified.
Finally a smile replaced the hate, and Gabriel reached over, "Here...let me help you out..." Travis pulled away, blushing hard from the sudden contact, "I-I'm f-f-fine, I c-can fi-ix it m-myself-f." He mentally cursed himself for becoming so skittish, his stutter had come out worse than it really was. Gabriel continued to smile, but let him go, "Okay. I guess I'll see ya then."
With a finally wave Gabriel left and Travis wondered if he really had seen him crying just a moment ago.
[S]: Become immersed in your fantasies about Gabriel.
Wait, that would defiantly never happen, he would never stoop to your level just to hang out.
[S]: Notice Gamzee's pestering.
TC:ReAlLy tAvBrO?
TC: ThAt's mOtHeRfUcKiNg aWeSoMe bRo
TC: WhO ArE ThEy?
TC: TeLl mE AlL AbOuT It bRo
TC: I CaN'T MiSs a mIrAcLe lIkE ThIs
[S]: Become an interested motherfucker.
In all honesty Gamzee was interested. Tavros had never said anything about love, and Gamzee was always sure to never say anything too weird. He had always thought that Tavros had maybe, felt something towards Gamzee, that they could maybe start something...
AT: uHHH,,, yEAH I AM,
AT: iT'S,,, sOMEONE I SEE AT SCHOOL a lot
AT: uHHHH,,, I JUST
AT: .i DON'T LIKE FEELING THIS WAY
Gamzee felt a smile creep up on his lips, his chest swelled with Tavros' orange text, it was just so much like him.
TC: No nEeD To wOrRy bRo
TC: LoVe iS A MoThErFuCkInG MiRaClE
TC: AnD ReAlLy, I ThInK YoU CoUlD GeT AlL Up wItH AnYbOdY YoU WaNtEd tO
TC: HeLl i wOuLd gEt tOgEtHeR WiTh yOu iF I CoUlD
Gamzee wanted to smack himself, so much for not creeping out his bro.
AT: uHHH,, tHAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU TO SAY
AT: .i DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO REACT TO THAT
AT: uHHHH,,,, bUT YOU DON'T UHHHH,, uNDERSTAND
Gamzee furrowed his brows, he sometimes hated how Tavros would always bash on himself.
Soon he remembered all that Tavros had shared with him, how he felt so lonely and lame, his self esteem was 6 feet under, and it fucking hurt Gamzee. Some of the thing Tavros would say about himself were all lies, it was sad to see the boy's self-loathing. He had tried to get Tavros out of that rut, if anything Tavros was the exact opposite of all the hateful words.
Tavros was beautiful and perfect and Gamzee just wished that he could have him.
Gamzee fucking dreamed about the shy boy, tried to get an image of how he was, to know exactly they would look together, he wanted to be able to finally see his love. It didn't even matter how he looked like, he would still be the same old Tavros. A hazy memory came to the surface, There was once two poets who lived far across the land from one another, and soon they had met by chance. There was no physical confrontation, but simply a sharing of words and syllables, they had read each others work. Soon letters were being sent, and the two fell in love.
Gamzee sighed, the story had struck a nerve in his chest, he wanted to have his affection returned, he wished that Tavros would go and see him. He just knew that this was different, that this was love, Tavros was everything to him.
They finally met in person, but by then they had already fallen in love, and soon they found their own world, filled with the best things in life. Of course life wasn't perfect, but they had somehow used those poems and words to communicate, they could never be separated.
Gamzee bit his lip, if anything he was used to being alone, and soon he felt tears escape his eyes.
He would let Tavros find love.
TC: jUsT gO fOr It BrO, i'M sUrE tHeY'lL lIkE yOu BaCk
The screen got blurry, and Gamzee could barely contain the wave of feelings, he was doing this for Tavros.
It wasn't until one of them became blind that it became an issue, and soon one was left all alone. The blind one wallowed in his home, his love had set eyes on another and finally left him.
AT: uHHHH,, .i GUESS I COULD TRY,,,
The blind poet desperately tried to use his words, but he could not see, he had no way of ever writing his poems again...
TC: It'Ll Be FiNe TaVbRo.
Gamzee wasn't sure if he was saying it to himself or to Tavros.
TC: : O)
AT: tHANKS GAMZEE
AT: }:)
adiosToreador ceased pestering terminallyCapricious.
Gamzee stared at the screen with confusion, but the he found himself kicked out, the game was logging him out and everything.
[S]: Become Gabriel.
He sighed, he wished he had more time with Tavros.